Chapter 4

I was furious. Like beyond pissed livid. At Zane. At Izzy. At my fucking cousins if it was true. I somehow BS’d my way around Coach Riojas and barely even remembered sitting through sixth period before I was headed to my last class. Grabbing a seat by the back window, I dropped my stuff in the seat beside mine for when Izzy arrived. Just like the rest of the damned day, guys fist-bumped me as I confirmed I was with Izzy as girls either looked pissed off or discouraged at the news. I just struggled to keep the bite out of my voice now. I hoped Izzy was getting this shit as bad as I was. Well, not really. But fuck was I pissed at her if she’d kept that shit from me.

At the same time, I didn’t trust Zane as far as I could throw him, so I was giving her the benefit of the doubt. The issue was…why the fuck would Zane lie about that when I could just ask her?

I was outright scowling when she walked in, and her brow rose. With effort, I schooled my features. The rest of the damn school didn’t need to know if we were about to be in a fight, but fuck if I didn’t still feel the steady tick in my jaw. I pulled my bag down so she could sit, and she tucked her hair behind her ears, worry in those bright green eyes.

Apparently, my poker face sucked.

“Are you okay?” she whispered.

Why? Tired of fucking lying to me?I shoved the thought back before it could slip out and bit the inside of my cheek. I shook my head instead. Lisa came in then, a smirk forming on her face when she saw the tension between us. Fucking pain in the ass. I seriously had no clue how I’d messed up with her. Twice.

Leaning over, I wrapped an arm around Izzy’s neck, pulling her close. Her breath hitched as I tucked my nose to her ear. To others, it would look like I was giving her a kiss, when instead, I whispered, “We’ll talk after class.”

Izzy swallowed at the grate in my voice, and I felt like an ass. I placed a kiss on her temple and sat back, not looking over again the rest of class.

The second the bell rang, I was out of my seat, and Izzy scrambled to follow. I draped an arm around her shoulders, just to keep Lisa from getting any stupid fucking satisfaction, because I knew the chick would find a way to throw it in Izzy’s face the second she sensed trouble in paradise. But Izzy knew something was wrong. I could tell from her stance. She was stoic, almost shaking with worry written across her face as we headed out to my truck. I helped her in, but the second my door was shut, I couldn’t hold back anymore.

“Did my cousins do something to you the other night?”

Izzy sucked in a breath, the sound all I needed to hear to know it was true. “What?”

I shook my head, now royally pissed by tenfold. “Don’t fucking lie, Izzy. Not anymore. Not about this. I had to hear it from fucking Zane!”

She jumped when I yelled, and her shoulders dropped, tears immediately prickling her eyes. “I’m so sorry.”

My heart dropped at seeing her tears, but I wasn’t ready to let it go. Not yet. Not this. Not after all they’d already done. Why doesn’t she trust me?

I shook my head and started the ignition. We needed out of this parking lot before any more eyes were on us.

The ride home was silent, aside from Izzy’s sniffles. Each swipe at her eyes was like a knife to my gut, but this didn’t feel like something I should just let go of. We couldn’t start off like this, hiding things from each other. It might be ugly, but we had to deal with it.

“Are you ever going to say anything?” Izzy asked when we finally pulled up in front of my house.

I hopped out and went around for her door. “Let’s go in.”

Grabbing our bags, I followed her inside and up the stairs to my room, where I dumped our things by my desk. Izzy stood awkwardly at the center of my room, the house still silent and empty aside from us. It was about to get loud.

I watched her hands shake as she tucked her hair behind her ears. She clutched them over her stomach and then at the frayed ends of her skirt at her sides. I was just trying to figure out how to start.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“How much do you know?”

The fuck? “Does it matter?!”

Izzy grimaced. “No, not really. You’re right. I hid it.”

“Why, though?! After everything we’ve been through together. After everything they’ve done, why didn’t you trust me enough to tell me?!”

“It wasn’t that I didn’t trust you. It was…”

“It was what?!” I begged when she paused.

“It was terrifying, okay?!” Izzy finally yelled back. “The last time they did something, you pulled away! I saw it! I watched you retreat, and it was weeks before you had anything to do with me again! So as soon as we get together, they pull something again, and I’m just supposed to run and tell you?!”

“Yes!” I stepped towards her. “That’s what you do when you’re in a relationship! You trust the person you’re with and tell them the truth, not hide shit! I fucking love you, Izzy, so of course I’m not going to pull away!”

She gasped, both of us freezing at my words.

“You love me?”

I took a moment to breathe, needing in that moment for it to be true. Knowing that it was. “With everything.”

She flew into my arms, our mouths tackling, tongues tangling. My hands were already reaching for her thighs when Izzy jumped and wrapped her legs around my waist. She tugged at my shirt behind my shoulders, her hands bunching the material as I fell atop her on the bed. I grabbed my shirt, yanking it the rest of the way off with one hand, and buried my lips into her neck, dragging kisses along her pale, smooth skin.

She grabbed my face, pulling me up so that my eyes met hers.

“I love you so freaking much. With everything.”

I growled at the way she copied my words, something inside me roaring with her declaration, and I devoured her mouth with mine as her hands found the button of my jeans. She yanked them down my ass, her hands reaching under my boxer briefs to grab my balls, and I groaned.

“Fuck that feels good.” She grinned, continuing to rub as I fumbled with the wrap on her top. “The fuck?” I finally grumbled, and Izzy laughed. Her hands left me to untie the knot, and I wanted to complain at the loss, but the second the knot on her top was pulled free, she let it fall open, revealing the black lace of her bra.

My mouth fucking watered, my hand instantly finding and cupping over the lace. Lifting her lower back with one arm, I reached with the other to pop the hooks free, pulling the lace and her shirt from her flesh. I ducked down, my lips taking in a rosy nipple, and she moaned, our movements becoming frantic once again. She quickly shoved down her skirt, and my fingers hooked under her panties, sliding them down her long legs before we tossed her clothes to the floor.

Desperate, aching, needing her, needing the connection between us again, I cupped her breast, trailing down her stomach with my tongue. She wiggled on the bed below me, her breaths short and fast, the signs all showing me that what she felt was good, but she pulled at my head before I could reach my destination between her thighs. I looked up, finding insecurity waiting for me in the mossy depths of emerald green. The tiniest shake of her head had me pulling back up, and I crawled over her, my own eyes asking her questions.

“I just…not that. Not yet,” she whispered. Without missing a beat, I swept her up in another kiss, my fingers slipping between her folds instead, and I groaned. She was so wet. Just like last time.

I pumped my fingers, my thumb rubbing fast circles over her clit until Izzy had to break our kiss with a gasp, her breaths now coming out in pants. Her eyes met mine before closing, and her head tossed back in my pillow before her body stiffened, her core spasming around my fingers. I kept moving, letting her ride out her orgasm until she finally grabbed my arm.

“God, you’re good at that,” she panted, and I smirked, pride swelling in my chest.

I got up, kicked off my jeans, and reached into my nightstand drawer for protection. I’d meant it when I’d promised her. Even if she was on the pill, we were taking every precaution we could. The second I rolled it on, Izzy pulled me back on the bed, and I hooked her knee over my arm before thrusting inside.

“Oh, my God,” she groaned, and I moaned, dropping my head over hers. A small piece of me had worried last time had been too good to be true. That it couldn’t be that amazing again, but just one second inside her, and I already knew that this was us. We were this good. That this girl was meant for me.

I pulled out and thrust again, setting a rhythm, matching my pace to hers as Izzy rocked her hips. I watched her, the delicate dip in her throat as she swallowed, the way her eyes closed when she grew close, how her hair spilled across my pillow. She was perfection. My fucking princess. She was mine.

I was forever fucking hers.

I grabbed her breast, thrumming gently over her nipple, and Izzy cried out with her orgasm, her back arching from the bed with her release. As soon as she was done, I let go of her leg and sat back, pulling her hips into my lap, and just like last time, it only took a few short strokes for her to come again. Noting that for later, I grabbed her hand when she reached for me and pulled her up over my lap.

“You like this move, huh?” I teased, and Izzy just smirked.

“Shut up and fuck me.”

Holy fuck, that was hot.“Yes, ma’am.”

I grabbed her hips, thrusting upwards as she pushed down, and damn if it didn’t feel fucking amazing. We met each other, Izzy clutching my shoulders as I matched her thrust for thrust. When she was getting close again, she grabbed my hair, yanking my head back, and she smashed her mouth against mine, using me to cover her cries, her pussy clenching my cock so hard I had to try not to come. I forced myself to ride it out, throwing her back on the bed again when she finally finished, and hooked her leg over my arm once again, letting her ride wave after wave until I couldn’t hold back anymore, collapsing over her in a final release of my own.

My breaths were still coming in fast pants when Tucker rolled off to the other side of the bed. He splayed a hand over his heart, his own breaths rapid, and then pulled me over so that I was now draped over his chest. He pressed a kiss to the top of my head, and I smiled, everything in me feeling it down to my toes. He’d meant what he’d said. And holy mess, had I meant it when I’d said it back.

It was several minutes of lying in contented bliss before I dared to speak, Tucker’s heart beating steadily beneath my ear. I was riding on air, but as the minutes ticked by, the euphoria slowly stepped back to let the dread seep in. We’d only touched the surface of what we’d needed to before.

“We should clean up.”

Tucker’s fingers were playing lazily with the ends of my hair by my back, but he stilled with my words, as if sensing everything I already knew was coming after.

“You’re right.”

I pushed off his chest, and he rolled out of bed, heading to his desk for a tissue. I watched as he worked the condom off into the trash.

“You can take the bathroom first.”

I nodded, noticing how less awkward this was now than our time before, and scooped up my clothes before darting through the door at the corner of his room into his private bathroom.

There was a pedestal sink with floating white shelves above the toilet that matched the white tile on the floor and shower. It contrasted nicely with the navy-blue walls he’d picked out when his mom had remodeled back when we were ten, the same color he’d painted his bedroom. Normally, it would feel too dark to me, but all the splashes of white balanced it out well. There were even black, white, and orange basketball pictures on the wall, a nod to his dream.

I quickly cleaned up and got dressed before taking a look in the mirror and groaned. My hair was a mess. Talk about bedhead. Knowing Tucker wouldn’t care, I borrowed his comb, doing my best to release the knots and get the strands to lay mostly straight again.

Once I was done, I slipped out to give Tucker a turn and dug through my backpack for my makeup bag, touching up what I could and putting on a fresh coat of lip gloss. I was just putting it away when Tucker came back out.

I went to sit on the edge of his bed, and he spun around his desk chair, sitting there to face me. A part of me ached at the space between us, but it was necessary. For this, at least.

My stomach was in my throat. Ryder warned me not to share, but technically, Zane was the one who blabbed. There was no way out of it now. It had been killing me to keep it in in the first place. If I was honest with myself, the reason I told Tucker earlier was more reality than any threat from Ryder.

I cleared my throat, knowing I had to start. Trying not to let my voice shake.

“I had just gotten done with my talk with Zane when Annie texted. Someone grabbed me from behind and threw something over my head before I could answer.

“I was shocked at first, but I fought to get free, thrashing and kicking, but he was too strong. He threw me in the SUV, and I scrambled for the door, but it was locked. I never stopped kicking. I’m pretty sure Ryder should have a good bruise on his head from where I kicked it into the window. Probably even a few more on his body from my heels.”

My eyes stayed on Tucker’s lap as I spoke, unable to meet his gaze. Afraid of the withdrawal I might see. Even after what we just shared, it plagued me.

“He got mad after that and grabbed my legs, yelling at me to stop. That’s when I knew who it was.” My voice sounded monotone. Robotic. It was creepy even to myself, but I had to check out to retell it. Even though nothing really happened, the terror of the unknown that night had left a scar.

“Ryder threatened me, made me swear that I’d never tell you about it. To never tell the cops or anyone about it. About anything he’d ever done with me. To me. He said I’d wish that was all he’d ever done if I told. The look in his eyes, the way he pinned me down…” My throat started to close, and I had to look away, my fingers clutching Tucker’s comforter. I took a deep breath through my nose as a few tears started to fall. “He was so rough. I was so terrified.”

I took another breath. “Micah was driving. He did warn him, I guess, when he started to get too rough, but you know Ryder.”

“He didn’t listen,” Tucker interjected, his voice like steel, the protector rising to the surface. I knew that tone, but never had I heard it so intense before.

“No, he didn’t. He kissed me, really rough, almost bruising, and grabbed my wrists.” My own hands mimicked the movement. “And yanked them above my head. It was then that Micah slammed on the brakes and yanked Ryder out of the car. It wasn’t supposed to go that far from what Micah said. He was just supposed to warn me off. After that’s when David and Zane showed up, and you pretty much know the rest. David got me out, and Zane dealt with them. We headed back right after.”

I stopped, the room silent and still. But holy mess was it filled. With tension. With anger, hurt. With everything screaming between us. What I’d give to be back on that bed in his arms again.

Another tear slipped down my cheek, and Tucker reached over to swipe it away with his thumb. “Are you okay?”

Finally meeting his gaze, I could see the concern in his eyes, the pain he felt for me, but oh, the anger that simmered behind the surface.

I held his stare. “I have to be.”

His jaw ticked, his swallow hard, and he dropped his head, everything in him tense for several moments before he looked back up. My heart clenched, and I looked back down, his reaction too much.

“Why didn’t you tell me? Fuck,” Tucker grated. He slammed his fist on his desk, and I jumped. I looked over, seeing all of the anger, frustration, and hurt pouring across his features, radiating down his entire form. “Fuck.” His head dropped, and he gripped the back of his neck. “Fuck, I know why you didn’t. I know he threatened you, but…seriously, fuck!”

He jumped up and stormed towards his door. My eyes flew wide. “Where are you going?”

“To deal with this shit!” He slammed the door behind him.

Shit.I raced to follow, but by the time I flung open his door, he was already halfway down the stairs. I stopped at the top. “Tucker! Wait! Please!” If he went, they would know I’d told.

“It’s fine, Izzy. I’ll deal with it,” he barked, throwing open the front door.

Jenna stepped back onto the front porch, surprise on her face as Tucker rushed past. “I’ll be back late,” he tossed over his shoulder as he hopped in his truck, tearing out of the driveway.

With a hand to her chest, Jenna stepped inside. “What in the world? Oh, Izzy,” she said when she spotted me. Her eyes trailed up from my legs, along my clothes, and lingered on my hair before taking in my expression and the tracks of tears on my face. She set down her purse and opened her arms, and my tears finally began to freefall. Rushing down the stairs, I flew into her arms.

“Oh, sweet girl. What’s my son done now?”

“Nothing. I swear. It’s not him.”

She stiffened. “Does that mean…” She trailed off, and it took me a second to realize what she thought I must have meant.

“Oh, God, no.” I stepped back, wiping my eyes. “Nothing like that. Not really, at least.”

“So, this…” Her eyes swept down my body and back to my face. “You and Tucker?”

I flushed and nodded. “We’re safe. I promise. But please don’t say anything to my mom,” I quickly begged. “With everything she’s going through right now… I mean, I don’t want you to lie to her, but I want to find a way to tell her myself. To tell her we’re together, not that…”

Jenna’s lips pressed together in a way that was all too similar to Tucker. “Okay, but don’t wait too long to tell her. She’s my best friend. Like you said, with everything she’s going through, she’ll be hurt if she finds out we’re keeping this from her.”

I nodded.

“Now, tell me how long you’ve been sleeping with my son.”

My face dropped into my hands. Oh, God.

Jenna laughed. “I’m kidding, Izzy. As long as y’all are safe. I know he’s been active in some capacity for a long time. At least tell me it’s not a fling. It’s official with y’all. Isn’t it?” Her hopeful green eyes studied me, and I sighed in relief.

“Yes, we’re definitely official.”

Jenna squealed and threw her arms around me in a hug. After swaying me back and forth for a few seconds, she leaned back. “Now, what’s going on with my son?”

Crap.