Chapter 32

I gave up on finding Izzy anywhere in Breaker Ridge after the church. Annie had texted that she and Jet had just checked the beach, so I knew that was a bust. I was running out of places to look.

The studio!A fresh burst of excitement hit me. Suddenly relieved Leo had insisted I take his number, I used the system in my truck to give him a call, waiting anxiously through every ring. It was a longshot with the current time, but I had to try.

Voicemail. I left a quick message and hung up, going to plan B.

The drive to Outer Ridge would take up a chunk of time, but if Izzy was there, I had to get to her. I was only about five minutes out of town when Leo’s text came through.

Leo: Jumping in my car now. Five min. If she’s not there, I’m searching, too.

Fuck, I knew I liked this guy.

I started searching a few backroads Izzy might be taking while I waited for his reply. It felt like forever but was only minutes when the text popped up on my truck’s screen.

Leo: Not there. I’m checking a few of our hangouts. Keep me posted.

Groaning, I smacked the wheel in frustration. I had to be missing something.

The beach!Hope burst through me again.

Annie hadn’t said where on the beach they’d looked. If they’d checked just our regular hangout in the public section, Izzy wouldn’t have been there. It was another stretch that was special.

Pressing my foot against the accelerator, I sped across the deserted streets to reach her, tearing across sand when I made it to the beach, praying my tires didn’t get stuck. But I could see long before I approached that her old Ford wasn’t there. Not even where we’d last parked just staring out at the old beach house.

Tonight, there was just the open expanse of sand, the pier, and water reflecting in the moonlight. I’d been almost positive I’d find her near here, where some of her last truly happy memories with her dad were made.

Deflated that I was wrong again, I turned around. Maybe it was time to call Annie and Jet to compare notes. It had been hours now that I hadn’t found her, time that Izzy was upset and alone and under the impression that what we had was dead. I shook with repulsion at the thought. There had to be a way to fix things. I refused to give up until I had.

I just have to find her first.

I’d just pulled out onto the main road when something silver glinted in my headlights up ahead. Speeding up, my stomach tightened, recognizing the rust spotted bumper of a familiar old Ford.

I was out of my truck nearly the moment it stopped, my worry outweighing my relief when I realized her truck wasn’t even on. Running up to the driver’s side, I peered through the window, but she wasn’t there, not that I could see. I crossed my fingers that she was just lying down and yanked the door open, air catching in my throat as a new state of panic took over. Fears I hadn’t even thought to consider before being confirmed.

This is bad. Correction. This is fucking horrible.

I pushed the panic aside to try to think, maybe understand what could’ve happened, to find something to explain why Izzy wasn’t here. Why she would’ve left the truck when one of the coldest fronts of the season had blown in.

My eyes quickly searched the empty area, the seats, the floorboards, the dash, every surface I could see until I caught sight of her keychain dangling from the ignition. I reached in and turned the key, but nothing happened.

“Shit.” She really needed a car that worked.

A blast of wind came at me then that caused goosebumps to ripple across every last inch of my body, and I shivered at the freezing cold that no native south Texan would be used to as I slammed the door shut. Whatever reason Izzy had for leaving the confines of her truck, it didn’t matter. What mattered was that she had left, and she was somewhere out in this inhumane cold.

But where? I looked up to the sky as I begged.

You know where… My gut insisted.

“Shit.” I’d been right. I knew it. I had to be.

I paused just long enough to grab the blanket and flashlight from my Chevy, thankful Dad had thought ahead, then turned and shot off down the long expanse of beach.

Digging the toes of my shoes into the loose sand, I ran as fast as I could back to that significant section of shore. The wind from the water blew wildly around me. Shells crunched under my feet. My injured ribs ached in protest with the quick, heavy expanse of my lungs. But I barely felt it.

I paused when I reached the steps that led up to the old property my grandpa used to own, certain she would be there, but I still sent up a small prayer, and taking a deep breath, I used the flashlight to add to the light of the moon. My heart dropped in my chest to see the empty steps, even shining the flashlight up to the porch, knowing the house was vacant with the winter season.

Nothing. It didn’t make sense. If I couldn’t find her here, then where?

I’d just decided to check further down the shore when a streak of lightning lit up the sky, the sound of thunder booming out around me, and I froze at the faint shriek that cried out in the wind.

Izzy.It had to be her. I’d known that shriek for years.

Rushing forward, trying to follow the direction I’d heard in the wind, all remaining air gushed from my lungs with my sigh of relief when I found Izzy curled up under the pier, the large beam placing her just out of sight from where I’d looked from the back edge of the shore. Her head was tucked into her arms, and her knees were clutched to her chest as water soaked her feet and clothes.

My heart broke to find her that way, alone and afraid and shaking with cold. I didn’t even stop to think about what I would say. I just walked up, unfolded the heavy blanket, and laid it over her shoulders, pulling her into my lap away from the wet sand.

“Tucker?” she murmured, her voice shaking as she curled into me for warmth.

“Yeah, it’s me, princess.” I ran a hand through her damp, curling hair, the strands no longer straight with the water.

“What are you doing here?” Her teeth chattered as she shook.

I swallowed, fighting back a grimace at her tone. There was no relief in it. All I could hear was the accusation behind it. “I came to find you. You nearly scared everyone out of their minds with the way you left.”

She frowned, her voice turning harsh. “You should leave.”

Unable to help it that time, I winced. “I’m not leaving without you.”

“Why not? I don’t want your pity.”

My pity?“That’s not why I’m here. I’m here because you need me. You’re freezing and there’s lightning, which I know you hate.” I paused at her wince. “Not to mention I found your truck. I know it won’t start, so how else are you going to get home? That, and your mom and sister will kill me if I leave you here like this. My parents would, too.”

She attempted a glare even as she shivered. “Don’t worry. You can tell them all I resisted. Tell them all I kicked you where it hurts with my boot for all I care. I wouldn’t want you to get torn up over me.”

I breathed out heavily through my nose, striving for patience, and gave her a pointed look. “I wasn’t finished.”

“What then?”

“I’m not leaving without you because I’ve screwed up enough these past weeks as it is, so I’m not going anywhere until I’ve made things right.”

“What do you mean?” Her face contorted in confusion as a shiver ran up her spine so strong that her body jerked in my lap.

I yanked off my jacket and pulled back the blanket to help her put it on. It swallowed her, falling well down her thighs, but I knew it wouldn’t help much with her pajama bottoms soaked underneath it.

“Take these off,” I instructed, tugging at the silky material at her thighs, and of course, she stubbornly shook her head. “Izzy, you’re freezing, and I need to get you warm.” I leveled her with a look, taking her glare until she finally complied, standing to slip the wet silk off. I pulled her back into my lap before she could protest, snaking my arms in the open front of the jacket to slide them under her silk top, doing everything I could think of to warm her frozen skin.

She shuddered when I pressed my hands to her back. “Tucker, please…” Her voice nearly broke, and it pulled at my chest to hear her desperate plea for me to pull away.

I continued anyway, tucking my head by hers. If what Annie said was true, then she’d want to hear it. “I should have never pulled away from you, princess. I’m so sorry. You needed me, and I wasn’t there.”

I felt her breath stagger beneath my hands. “Really?”

“You don’t believe me?”

“I want to.”

“So do.” Please.

“I’m not sure I can.”

“Why?”

“Because everything else made perfect sense,” she explained, her voice soft at my ear, tortured. “I understood why you didn’t want to be around me. Why you didn’t want me anymore.”

“You thought I didn’t want you anymore?” Surprise coated my voice, and Izzy nodded against my shoulder. I groaned as she shivered. “No, Izzy. That couldn’t be further from the truth. I want you. I want us, more than anything. I always will. I thought you knew that.”

She didn’t respond, and just when I was trying to figure out what to say next to convince her, she leaned back, opening the blanket to wrap it around us both, clutching the ends together between us with the fingers of her casted arm.

“Princess.” She looked up, meeting my eyes, so much hesitancy still in her gaze. “I love you,” I told her. “So much. I always will. No matter what.”

Her breath hitched, those green eyes of hers darting between mine, searching for my sincerity. Eventually finding what she needed, she nestled in closer, her broken arm still tucked between us. She tucked her cast-free hand under the thick material of my sweater, her fingers like ice as she pressed them to my chest, and she buried her icy cheek into the warmth of my neck. I tensed at the initial contact of cold but relaxed as my body heat finally began to flow to her. She could take all she needed.

“You really mean it, don’t you?” she whispered in relief.

“Of course I do.” Lightning flashed again, and Izzy stiffened in my arms as the thunder crashed around us. “Izzy?” I asked when she calmed.

“Yeah?”

“Can you explain something for me?”

“What?”

“Why did it make perfect sense for me not to want you anymore? I thought it was the other way around.”

“What?”

“That’s why I stayed away. Because I didn’t think you’d want me. Not after what I did to you. To our baby.” My voice broke on the last word. “I could barely look at you. You looked so lifeless, and I knew it was all my fault. I thought for sure you’d look at me in disgust. You wouldn’t even have to say it. The blame would be there. So instead, I just stayed away. I thought I was giving you what you wanted.”

“I did feel lifeless.” Izzy’s voice was quiet. “Everything was numb. Most of the time. But I would never want you to stay away. I’ll always want you. I thought you knew that,” she replied, using my words against me. “It wasn’t your fault,” she finished.

I shut my eyes. “Don’t try to make me feel better. I deserve to feel this way after what I did. I shouldn’t have fought Zane. I should’ve pulled him off of you and then gotten you out of there, but I lost my temper instead. Our fight made you fall. It’s my fault our daughter is gone.”

Izzy looked up from my neck, freeing her arm from the warmth of my skin to wipe a tear that sat, ready to fall, at the corner of my eye. “Listen here, whiskey.” I opened my eyes, surprised at the playful sincerity she used with my nickname. “I don’t blame you at all. I thought you blamed me. I didn’t fall because of you.”

“What are you talking about? Of course, you did.”

“No, I didn’t,” she insisted. “It was my fault that I fell.”

“No.”

“Yes.You didn’t do anything. It was me. I stepped back. My heel missed the step. It was all me.”

“But if I hadn’t lost control, that never would’ve happened.”

“You were trying to protect me. I should’ve never argued with Zane. I know how he can be, what he did the last time I yelled at him, but I got mad anyway.”

“You didn’t look mad when I got there. You looked upset, and he wouldn’t take his hands off you.”

“But I was mad before he tried to kiss me. That’s why he did it.”

“He kissed you because you were mad?”

“Apparently, it turns him on or something. Everything he was saying, I just got so fed up and disgusted.”

I took in a deep breath to steady the anger swelling in my middle. “You should’ve been. You’ve warned him off plenty of times.”

“No, that’s what led to the fall. I lost our baby because I couldn’t control my anger.”

“No.” My tone rang with finality. “It was not your fault. Someone who has hurt you before was hurting you again. You got upset. You stepped wrong on the stairs. End of story.”

Izzy stared back with just as much ferocity. “Then it goes both ways.”

“No, it doesn’t.”

“Yes. It does. If it’s not my fault, then it’s not yours, either. You had no control over what I did with my feet. You were protecting me from someone you knew could hurt me. You got upset. End of story.”

The stare between us was intense, but eventually, I relaxed my gaze and gave her a nod. “Okay.”

“Okay.”

She tucked her hand back under my shirt just as more lightning flashed, lighting up the entire sky around us so bright that it could have been day, and Izzy buried her face back into my neck with a small screech. I held her closer, running my hands along her back.

“Do you think that’s our cue to head back?” I smiled by her ear. She didn’t move, her body still tense. “You’re not ready to go back, are you?”

“No.”

I frowned. “Izzy, you’re so cold.”

“I don’t mind. I just need you.” She sighed, relaxing her head against my shoulder.

Sighing my consent, I pulled out my phone and sent out a text to everyone involved with the search, realizing I should’ve done it before.

“Come on.”

“But–”

“Just trust me.”

I shifted her from my lap so we could both stand and scrolled through my phone, turning up the volume before sliding it back in my pocket, and Izzy looked up when it started to play.

“Our song.” She smiled, and I held my arms open for her to step in.

“Didn’t your dad remind you to dance?”

“You saw the letter.”

“I did. Now, are you gonna get your pretty ass over here to dance with me or not?”

Beaming, fresh tears in her eyes, she stepped into my arms.

“Tell me a secret,” Tucker’s voice vibrated against my ear through his chest. I was lying half on top of him in his truck, where we’d ducked out of the cold and wind, and sounds from the ocean still carried in, washing over us in the predawn air, though we were now warm. My fingers trailed along the contours of Tucker’s chest as his fingers played with the ends of my hair. I was just basking in the comfort of being in his arms again. I think we both were.

“What kind of secret?”

“Anything. Something I don’t know.”

“A hard demand from someone I’ve known my whole life,” I teased, and I felt his smile even though I couldn’t see it. “I hate my nickname.”

Tucker stilled. “Princess?”

“No. Izzy.”

I lifted my head to place my chin on my cast to look at him, finding the surprise in his face I figured I’d see.

“Seriously?” he asked, and I nodded.

“Always have.”

“Then why haven’t you ever said anything?”

I shrugged. “Annie came up with it, and it made her happy.”

Tucker frowned, his head falling back against the seat as his fingers went back to playing with my hair. “I can’t believe I didn’t know this.”

I smiled, reaching up to trace along his strong jaw and the several days’ worth of stubble. Just reveling in being able to touch him again. “It’s okay. I’m used to it.”

“Do you like Isabel better, then?”

“I do. But don’t worry about it. I only brought it up because you asked for a secret. Now, will you tell me one?”

He hesitated for a moment, and my brow furrowed. “Sorry, just debating on which one. There’s two.”

“Oh, yeah?” I perked up. “Well, now I need to hear both.”

He smirked before looking solemn. “Zoey Faye.”

“What?”

“Our daughter. I had to give her a name. For the death certificate. I chose Zoey because it means life. Something she should have had. And Faye was for you.”

My eyes closed, and I shook my head, letting him know I needed a minute as emotions flooded my chest. It was just too perfect. I didn’t even have words.

“Thank you,” I whispered when I could talk. “I love it.”

He released a breath of relief. “Good. Because, I mean, we’re stuck with it either way,” he teased, trying to lighten the mood, and I smiled.

“True. Good thing you picked well. Now, how about that other one?”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah…we’re talking fair here, whiskey. You don’t get to bring up a secret and not spill.”

“If you insist.” He grinned, reaching out to open his glove compartment, and my jaw dropped when a little black box rolled out. He opened it, a large diamond sparkling in the moonlight. “Will you marry me?”

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