29. JT

CHAPTER 29

JT

For the second time this month, I’m sneaking around Coach’s house.

This time, though, I’m on the outside, staring up at the rear of the house and wondering if I trust the drainpipe to hold my weight.

I don’t, but I’m out of options.

Maggie looked like hell at Thanksgiving yesterday, and I could do fuck-all about it. Before dessert was served, she excused herself upstairs and never came back down. I texted her three times, but she just told me she was tired and felt like crap and that we could talk tomorrow.

It’s tomorrow.

She’s not answering my texts and I’m genuinely worried. Coach and Jules left at five a.m. to do their Black Friday shopping. It’s a tradition, I guess. But that means Maggie’s home alone. I seriously think she needs to see a doctor and I’ll drag her there myself if I have to.

I shoot off one more text.

JT : Is this gutter pipe gonna hold me?

JT : Also, is your window open?

Thank fuck, my phone pings .

Maggie: What? Where are you?

JT : Outside your window like a perv. I was gonna ring the bell out front but there’s a doorbell cam.

JT : You feeling any better today?

Maggie : I missed your texts because I was sleeping. Go around to the garage. The code is 060809.

Maggie : I’m in my room. Top of the steps, second door on the right. But you know that because you were just eyeing up my window. Like a weirdo.

JT : Not a weirdo. A concerned boyfriend. I think you should see a doctor. I’m worried about you.

Maggie : Come upstairs.

Less than a minute later, I’m standing in her bedroom. She’s curled up in bed, looking beautiful. And awful.

“Do you have a thermometer?” I ask, touching the back of my hand to her forehead. Her skin is soft and cool.

“I don’t have a fever,” she tells me, her voice soft.

“I’ve been googling illnesses since last night. I don’t recommend it,” I tell her. “You could have mono. Or it could be autoimmune.” I pull up the list of diseases I’ve cataloged on my notes app, but my fingers fumble when my eyes land on her nightstand.

Holy . Shit .

Sitting next to her watch and a book about succulents, there’s a white cardboard box with pink and blue lettering.

“Maggie,” I say her name quietly, but my heart is pounding so loudly that I’m sure she can hear the beat.

“I haven’t taken it yet. I…I should. I will. I wanted to talk to you and then…”

“It’s okay,” I assure her. “You want to do it now?”

“Yeah,” she says as she pulls the covers back. I smile because I was right—she’s got on tiny little sleep shorts and an oversized sweatshirt. My eyes zero in on her mid-section, but I can’t notice anything because her shirt is three sizes too big .

“They say it’s most reliable first thing in the morning,” she says, taking the box from her nightstand and stepping into her ensuite bathroom. I follow her, but she blocks the doorway. “You are not watching me pee.”

If that test says what I bet it will, I’m going to be watching her give birth in the not-so-distant future. But that information would probably not help my case, so I back up and sit on her bed. “I’ll wait right here.”

“You do that,” she instructs, giving me a smile as she shuts the door.

A minute later, I hear the toilet flush and the faucet run. Finally, the door opens, and she joins me on the bed. Instead of sitting, though, she goes right back to her previous position. She’s lying on her side, the covers pulled up to her chin. Kicking my sneakers off, I lie next to her and trace her features with my finger.

“You know that doesn’t matter, right?” I say before I realize how dumb I sound. “I mean, yeah, it matters in terms of, like, medical care. You either need pre-natal vitamins or you’ve got one hell of a nasty bug. But you and me? My feelings haven’t changed, Maggie. I want to be with you.”

My beautiful girlfriend shakes her head. “Are you crazy?”

“Nope,” I answer. “Not crazy. Just in love with you.” It’s the first time I’ve said those words, not just to Maggie, but to anyone. They aren’t familiar words to me, and they’re not ones I say lightly. But they’re true.

“JT, we…” her words trail off and she starts to bury her head in the pillow, so I tip her chin up to look at me.

“We’re doing this, Maggie. You can trust me.”

“We might not be,” she says. “I mean, all the signs point to yes, but we haven’t looked at the test yet. It could be negative.”

I shake my head. “I’m not talking about the test. I’m talking about this— us . We’re together, Maggie, no matter what that test says. ”

“What about the other four I have stashed in my drawer?” She’s biting her lip and doing her best to be sweet and brave, but she can be a fucking mess and I’ll still love her.

“Doesn’t matter. We’re happening. You and me, Maggie. And anybody who may or may not join us in the near or distant future.”

“The words are right. Not just right,” she says, shaking her head. “Perfect. They’re perfect.”

“I’m not perfect, Maggie. But I’m honest. And loyal as they fucking come. And so damn in love with you that I’m eyeing up drainpipes and sneaking into storage closets.” And lying. I’m lying to my coach, to my teammates and I hate it. I’m ready to come clean, regardless of what that white plastic stick says.

She blinks up at me. “I’m bruised and damaged and not whole enough to take on a relationship right now, JT. If I’m…All my energy needs to be there, you know?”

She’s killing me. I’m gonna dissolve into nothingness right here in her bed. “What can I say to make you believe that I will be right here with you?”

Her pretty blue eyes are full of sadness. “It’s not you I don’t believe in. It’s me. It’s love. It’s…my trust was shattered by someone else and I’m sorry, JT, but you’re standing in the ruins of it. That’s not fair to you, I know. It’s not that I don’t want to trust you. It’s not even that I don’t think you believe what you’re saying. It’s just that…I’m all out of trust. There’s none left. It’s just dust.”

I smile at her. “Trust dust…That’s enough for me, Cinderella.”

“It can’t be. That’s?—"

“It is. For now,” I say, just as the timer on her phone goes off.

Her hands are shaking, so I take them in my own. “Everything good in my life has been unexpected. Everything. So, this is a good thing. I can feel it. ”

“I think it’s a good thing, too. If I am actually…” Her words trail off as she bites her lip. “JT, we’re at different places in our lives. I’m about to graduate. You still have two years left. You have such a different path than I do.”

“I don’t, though,” I counter. “I haven’t since the night I met you. I wanted you back then, two months ago, last week, yesterday, five minutes ago. Right the fuck now. This,” I say, pointing to the open bathroom door, “changes nothing.”

Maggie quirks her brow at me.

“It just makes things more exciting,” I tell her. “You ready to look?”

She nods and steps out of bed, grabbing my hand and dragging me with her. The test is laid out on a paper towel, and I’m not surprised. Maggie and germs do not get along.

Those two pink lines are practically neon. I can see them from the doorway. I bet I could see them from the street. They’re damn near glowing.

And so is Maggie as tears stream down her face. I kiss them away as I lift her up and carry her back to bed.

“I’m pregnant,” she says, like she’s tasting the words for the first time.

“Yeah,” I agree, realizing that we probably should have come to this conclusion sooner. “How far along do you think you are?”

“I don’t know. I started to wonder earlier this week. I’ve been feeling like crap forever, but we’ve never gone without a condom. It’s…at first, I just thought my period was coming. I’ve never been regular. And then I just sort of…got used to feeling blah? I mean, life’s been crazy, right? I came here to lie low. To lick my wounds. To put my head down and study and get my degree…in risk management. So, the sneaking around…that’s not me. Okay, I know in this situation, it’s all me. It’s just not the way I usually operate. But nothing is going according to plan. It hasn’t for almost a year and?—"

“And plans change, Maggie,” I say, holding her gaze because she’s starting to spiral. “Also, fuck plans. I was just trying to figure out how long we have until…well, until there are three of us. I have a guess, but you’d know better than I would.”

She reaches for her phone and taps a little icon. “Oh, shit.”

“What’s wrong?”

“I knew I was late, but I didn’t realize how late. The last time I had my period, it sucked. Came out of fucking nowhere. I was out to dinner with friends and…yeah.”

Jesus. Men have it so much easier than women do. “Ok, that sucks. When was it? Were you out with Viv?”

“Nope. I was in California. It was right before I moved here. Maybe a week or two before I met you.”

I kiss Maggie, and then I smile. “So, you’re telling me that condom we pulled out of the bottom of an ancient first aid kit in a frat house basement bathroom just might have been faulty. Huh.”

And…we’re back to the spiral. “Oh my god. We are both smart people, JT. How could we have?—"

“Are you kidding me? I wanted you so damn bad that I’d have walked bare-ass naked into the kitchen and asked for some fucking plastic wrap if there hadn’t been any condoms around. That hasn’t changed, by the way,” I say, looking down at the tent in my sweats.

Maggie blushes. “It hasn’t changed for me, either. No matter how hard I tried, I could never resist you. Not physically, but not emotionally, either. Not in any way. You’re the best part of my day, JT. Even if I only see you for a few seconds, or only have time for a few quick texts. They carry me through.”

“You’re the best part of my life, Maggie.” I’m not sure if she realizes just how true my words are, but her lips latch onto mine and my hands find the hem of her shirt and pull it upward. I need to see her, all of her. I tug her shorts off as I settle her on the center of the bed. “Lie, back for me. Let me look at you.”

Damn .

It’s been almost two weeks since we’ve been together, and that was in a bathroom stall at Wolfie’s. So classy. The changes to her body aren’t dramatic yet, but they’re there. Her breasts are fuller, her belly softer. There’s the barest hint of a bump, and fuck , that turns me on. It shouldn’t. It’s gotta be all kinds of fucked up, but I don’t care.

“Are they still so sensitive?” I ask, my fingers inching up her body.

She shakes her head. “I don’t think so.”

“Okay if I test that theory?” I ask, settling over her, my hands braced on either side of her shoulders.

She arches up. “I really think you should— fuck .”

The curse falls from her mouth as I close my lips over her nipple and cup her other breast with my hand. I’m being as gentle as I can, but when she grips the back of my head and pulls me closer, I give her exactly what she wants: my hungry mouth all over her body. I’m starving for her, and I’m not shy about it. No one’s home and we’re on a bed and she’s carrying my baby. I’ve got no fucking chill at all, and I’m not even sorry about it.

I slip my hand between us to find her ready for me. So damn ready. She’s fucking my hand and I’m rubbing her clit and there’s no finesse, but I just need to watch her come for me. I need to see her sex get wetter. I need to feel her body convulse with the power of an orgasm. I need to part her legs and push inside her without a barrier.

“Do it,” she urges, reaching for me.

I tilt her hips up and drag the head of my cock along her seam, teasing us both before I fill her up.

Her body takes me in like it missed me, and it needs me. I rock into her, greedy for another orgasm. Is she more sensitive now? Does it feel as good as before ?

“Better,” she says, answering the question I didn’t know I’d said out loud.

I’m holding her close, pumping into her in shallow little bursts. I’m not dumb enough to think my dick’s getting anywhere near the baby—holy shit, the baby —but still, I don’t want to be too rough with Maggie.

“JT,” she keens, my name a plea. “Give me more. Harder. Faster. I?—”

Well, when she puts it that way…Who am I to deny the mother of my child?

I snap my hips and go deep. She cries out as I keep the same rhythm, grinding our bodies together. The base of my spine tingles, sending a warning to my brain, but there’s no cause for alarm. Maggie’s there already. She comes hard, gripping my shoulders and crying out just as I pour into her.

An hour later, we’re lying together, still incredulous.

“I’m pregnant,” Maggie says for the millionth time, but I’ll never get tired of hearing it.

“Are you freaking out yet?” she asks. “Because I’m waiting for you to freak out.”

“I’m not gonna freak out,” I tell her, also for the millionth time.

“I’m serious, JT.”

“So am I, Maggie,” I mimic. “Make an appointment, ok? No matter the time, I’ll be there.”

“Your schedule’s crazy,” she argues.

“I’ll be there. I don’t want to miss any moments, Maggie. Not unless I have to. I want to hear our baby’s heartbeat. Find out when you’re due. I mean, we pretty much know but, we could be wrong…”

She traces my tattoos with the tip of her finger. “You really think it happened in a bathtub at a frat house? ”

I press a kiss to her lips. “I think the first time we made love, we also made a baby. And that it just so happened to be in the bathtub of a frat house basement. I also think we better get you some prenatal vitamins and find all the foods that contain folic acid. And I think there’s a very good chance you won’t be walking at your graduation this spring. If you do, then we’ll probably be stopping at the hospital on the way home. That’s what I think. What do you think?”

Maggie looks up at me, her smile genuine. “I think going to that party was the best decision I ever made.”