Chapter 6

Chapter Six

Moore

I wrap my hands around my throat, trying to keep my heart from jumping straight out of my mouth. Allie is asleep in the cabin’s one bed. I’m pacing at the end of it, trying to get my fucking emotions under control. I don’t know how to exist like this. I haven’t known how to exist in a long fucking time when it comes to Allie James.

Four years ago, life was dismal, barren, lonely…except for her. Maybe I didn’t have parents to come home to. Maybe I had to scrape through odd jobs to afford food, rent. But at least I could get out of bed every morning knowing I’d see her walking the halls. Then I won her and lost her all in the space of a night and life turned into this ugly, soul-sucking doom cloud.

Now? Now I’m caught somewhere in the middle. I don’t have her. She’s committed to leaving, I can see that. But I haven’t quite lost her yet. Not completely. Her mind might be made up to leave. Her body—and God willing, her heart—are another story entirely.

The thing is…Allie can’t see herself when I’m inside of her. She can’t see the vulnerability and affection and hope in her eyes. Can’t feel the absolute trust she grants me. I feel it. I see her.

There has to be a chance I can keep her.

What would life even be without a chance to have this girl all of my days?

Part of me is so guilt ridden over the bullying, it’s telling me to have some decency, some mercy on her and walk away. I don’t know how to do that without killing myself in the process. I don’t think I could physically do it.

“Moore…” she murmurs, turning over in her sleep. “Cold.”

With my heart pinwheeling, I lunge toward the side of the bed and crawl in beside her, nearly moaning out loud when she snuggles up against me, face in my throat, her smooth nudity turning my cock to stone. Christ. How many times can we have sex before it’s too much? These are things I don’t know.

There are so many things I don’t know. Like why I want to fuck her in the ass so badly. Or why having my finger there made me so hot. Why I wanted to spank her, why I said such crude things. And is there something I should be doing for her afterward? Seems like maybe I should be building a monument in her honor or naming a constellation after her pussy. In all of my fantasies, all of my day-dreaming, I never knew it would be so perfect, so utterly addicting to be inside of Allie, but obviously I’ve worn her out, exhausted her, adding to my guilt. My cock doesn’t seem to care or feel guilty, though. It’s lifting toward the notch between her legs, wedging there. Fuck. She’s so warm and wet and soft, I groan without sound.

Focus, Moore.

I have until Monday to soften her toward me. I have until Monday to make her forgive me enough to need me. She’ll never need me as much as I need her, but if I inspire even a fraction of my devotion in Allie, it’ll be enough to sustain me for life. I know I’m hoping for too much. To be forgiven for what I’ve done is a lot to ask, but I’ll never want for a single thing for the rest of my life, if I can just have this girl.

Please let me have this girl.

My body is urging me to roll Allie onto her back. Take her again. I could probably just get off by pressing her sleepy palm to my cock, but I ignore my near-constant lust and enjoy her warmth instead. I must fall asleep for a while because the next time I open my eyes, the very beginnings of morning light are reaching through cracks in the drawn blinds and Allie is looking at me from the other side of our shared pillow. “Hey,” she whispers, voice husky from sleep.

“Morning.” The wariness in her eyes stops me from pulling her close, but I burn to have her against me, like she was in sleep. When she forgot who I am and what I did. “Sleep okay?”

After a second, she nods. “Yes. I’m kind of surprised, actually. There is so much ahead, so many decision to make, but…the one I made last night, leaving home, it’s such a relief to finally have it over, sleeping was easier.” I hum in my throat, give in to my urgent need to brush the hair back from her face. “Or maybe it was you,” she whispers. “You’re very warm.”

“Consider me your own personal furnace, Allie. Any time. Anywhere.”

Is it my touch that’s causing her eyelids to flutter? God, I hope so.

“Moore…” She fingers the edge of the pillow. “We talked about me going to college, but not you. Did you apply?”

I’m already shaking my head. “Nah. I could never afford it and what I want to do? I don’t really need a degree for that. Working with my hands.”

“You want to continue being a handyman?” she asks, no surprise or judgment in her tone. Only open curiosity.

“Sort of, just on a larger scale.” Talking to her about the future at all, even if it’s mine we’re talking about—and not ours—feels so good, I can barely get a decent swallow. “Last summer, I got some handyman work with an older couple in Perryville. I noticed they had some rot under their porch. It was dangerous for them to be sitting on it, especially at their age. Normally I wouldn’t try and upsell anybody, but I thought…I could make them a new deck. I wanted to try. So I ran it by them and they offered to pay me. I’ve done three more since then.”

Her exhale leaves a smile behind. “Moore, that’s great. You want to work in construction.”

“Outdoors, yeah. Enclosed decks and porches where someone can watch a storm. Safely.” The back of my neck burns. “Got the idea from you.”

I’m just telling her the truth, I don’t expect her to soften, but she does. She even slides a little closer to me in the bed clothes, tracing a finger down the center of my pecs—and Jesus, my cock stiffens so fast, my vision swims sideways. She knows it, too, because it brushes her belly on the way to full mast.

You can’t have her right now. She’s going to think you’re a pervert, going at her again so soon like a jackrabbit. Still, I’m pretty sure the sweat forming on my upper lip isn’t doing anything to disguise how horny I am. Constantly, apparently.

I clear my throat, take a breath. “Do you know what you want to do, Allie? After college?”

“Oh yes,” she breathes, a smile spreading across her pretty mouth. “I’m going to be a meteorologist. I’m going to study weather patterns.”

Pride hits me unexpectedly, right there in the chin. This girl is a wonder. Comes with passion built in. Strength. Fortitude. I should be dragged out into the pasture and shot for ever trying to dim her light or tear her down. “Damn right you are, Allie. You’re going to be amazing at it, too.”

That causes her breath to catch. “Thank you,” she murmurs. “You’re the first person I’ve told.”

When I manage to speak, my voice rings with emotion. “I’m honored.”

“I’m honored, too.” She slides another inch closer to me, trapping my cock between our bellies. “I’m the first person you’ve told about wanting build porches and decks for a living, aren’t I?”

“Of course you are,” I say, wrapping an arm around her waist and dragging her up against me where we exhale roughly into one another’s mouths, our hips locking together. Sweet Christ, yes. “You’re my first everything.”

Neither one of us makes the move to light the sexual wick that will burn out of control. We hover there, in the place right before the explosion, our hearts hammering together, fingers sliding on skin, hips tilting and pushing subtly. “Moore?”

I scrub my palm up her spine, sliding my fingers into her hair and conforming my hand to her scalp. “Yes, baby.”

We breathe together for long moments, suspended. “Life has been hard for me, but I wanted to say…I know it has been hard for you, too. No parents. No one at home. And…” She kisses my throat, rolling my eyes back in my head, but I struggle to comprehend what she’s telling me. It’s important. My bones are already vibrating with that knowledge. “I’m sure when you’ve been left behind, then someone comes along that you want…you might lash out when they leave, too. I’m just…”

“Allie,” I whisper.

“I forgive you.”

“No,” I growl, even though it’s what I wanted. Needed. It’s too much. It’s more than I deserve, having her body wrapped around mine, her grace infiltrating my soul. “No. Don’t. You can’t. I was awful—”

She stops my denial with a kiss. “It’s my forgiveness to give.” I’m marveling over her, falling deeper and deeper in love than I already am when she reaches between us and guides my cock between her legs, notching me inside her wet, little hole and wiggling down on it. Throwing her outer leg over mine, so all I have to do is roll over and thrust and I’m home, roaring into her hair. In gratitude. In lust. My hips already pumping like full-speed pistons.

* * *

We lose track of time. The outside world is inconsequential.

There is only us and this bed. The shower. The lake. The kitchen table.

An hour can’t seem to pass without whatever we’re doing turning into a full contact sport, Allie’s panties on the floor, my hips jerking between her legs. I thought I was fixated on her before, but this is a new height. Knowing how to give her an orgasm gets me a new level of Allie, the physical level, and every time I satisfy her, I grow a little more attached. More obsessed.

The way she behaves with me all day Sunday, it’s almost like she’s feeling the same way. I catch her eyes on me across the room, her nose wrinkled thoughtfully. Maybe she’s waiting for me to turn back into a monster. It’s because of that worry that I do my damnedest to wait until she initiates sex—and I’m shocked and grateful every time she does. Every time she unzips my pants and offers me her pleading little mouth, scooting her butt onto the closest surface and opens her legs for my cock. This goes beyond addiction. Beyond anything I knew existed. I’ve fucked her four glorious times today—hard, rabid, sweat-soaked sessions that left us depleted—and here we are again.

A few minutes ago, she woke up from a nap. Sat up and looked down at me shyly, exhaling. Wetting her lips. She trailed a hand down my stomach and slipped it beneath the sheet where I was already stiff, waiting anxiously, her hand closing around me and stroking once, twice, three times. My strangled moan was still hanging in the air when this tight little goddess got down on all fours, facing the end of the bed, letting me see everything.

Everything. That’s what I’m looking at right now.

She’s rosy and swollen from being banged so many times today, but so is my cock and it’s still eager. As she clearly is now, waiting for me to take her from behind for the first time. Pouting back at me over her shoulder.

“Tilt,” I whisper, sliding my hands up the backs of her thighs and over her naked backside. I massage her cheeks, parting the supple flesh, swallowing hard over the pucker of her asshole, made extra visible when she follows my command, tilting her hips, throwing her head back a little. My cock leaks fluid onto the sheets, my abdomen knitting up violently. This position isn’t for a boy and girl. It’s for a man and a woman. And I don’t know if my craving to lick her untried entrance is right or wrong, but it’s necessary. I’m salivating, a bead of sweat rolling down my back.

I start to lean down. Maybe I’ll just kiss it and see what happens.

That’s when I notice the full-length mirror across the room. I can see her face. See the way she squeezes her eyes closed, biting her lip in anticipation. It’s too much of a temptation to watch her react to a lick of that little pink hole. So I do it. A growl leaves me involuntarily as my tongue drags slowly over that pretty ring.

Allie’s eyes fly open on a gasp.

Our gazes find one another in the mirror—and I grip her cheeks tight and do it again, again, stiffening my tongue and laving her, my right hand relinquishing one of side of her butt so I can knuckle her pussy. And ahhh, Jesus, she’s already soaked, her clit swollen from so much attention today. Never able to resist that little bud for long, I get down on my elbows and crane my neck, tonguing her hungrily from below, her mewling sounds getting me hotter, hornier, my hips rocking on the mattress, her moisture dampening my chin.

“Moore. N-n-now.” Her thighs start to tremble. “Now.”

When she says now, it means she wants my cock.

Immediately.

No more waiting.

I’m all too desperate to give Allie what she wants, rising up on my knees and guiding my dick to her slick cunt and bucking inside, my hips smacking off her tight butt. “Ah Jesus, Allie, baby,” I grit out, light bursting in front of my eyes, the need to thrust almost painful. “It’s…I’m deeper like this. Am I hurting you?”

We meet eyes in the mirror again and she seems dazed, dumbstruck. “A little.” She pushes back, maneuvers forward and swallows up my cock again, ripping a curse out of my throat. “I like the way it makes me feel.” Her knees inch wider. “Tempting. Bad.” She arches her back and I almost swallow hard over the reflection of her tits. “Did you ever think of having me like this…and being my bully at the same time?”

My balls tighten up, my breath coming faster. “What do you mean?”

Slowly, she slides her cunt up and down my erection, leaving the trunk of it wet and glistening, her movements, her voice hypnotic. “I mean did you ever think of following me home and really bullying me. Like this. On my hands and knees.”

It dawns on me in a flash. What she’s asking me. Did I ever think of forcing her? Did I ever think of taking what I needed without permission? And the unequivocal truth is that I would never take anything Allie didn’t offer me. Never. I don’t have that kind of violence inside of me, especially when it comes to this girl. This girl of my dreams. But… “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think about…making you like it. Wondering if I could make you like having me…inside you.”

She continues that tight ride of pussy up, down, up, down, the bottom of my spine already beginning to crowd. “Tell me how you would have done it.”

The air in the cabin feels hot and thick, impossible to get into my lungs. There’s something sinfully low beating, deep in my belly, the confession making me ache for release and feel shameful about it at the same time. Shame on you. “I’d get you behind the school and…play with your pussy through your panties until you stopped fighting and started moaning.” I press my chest down to her back and start to pump, unable to help it, the dark, recalled fantasy driving my body to fuck. “And then I would just…I’d just push down your panties and shove my dick in. Just for some relief, Allie. Just for some fucking relief.”

I’m tunneling in and out of her now, faster, faster, watching her tits jiggle in the mirror, her eyes glazed with sex, as are mine. The slapping sound that fills the cabin is adult and raunchy and drugging and we go harder, loving it, made helpless to do anything but give in to the maturing needs of our bodies.

“I would have moaned,” she murmurs haltingly. “I would have pulled down my own panties for you.”

Jesus Christ. I’m nearly in the throes, can’t form words. I’m made incoherent by Allie’s confession. By the sensual tilt of her mouth, the knowledge in her eyes that I’m under her spell. All I can do is pump into her from behind like a grateful dog.

“Bully me,” she whispers, face flushing.

On some level, I knew it was coming. The roughness of our sex, the way I’m behind and on top, physically stronger, conquering her…it’s woken up something that I like maybe a little too much. And as always, I’m not capable of denying this girl anything she asks for. Especially when—shamefully—I want to give it.

Still humping her furiously, I lean down and press my mouth to her ear. “Finally came slumming it, didn’t you, rich girl? Too good to talk to me in the hall, but once we’re alone, you gave this pussy right up.” I wrap my hand around her throat, squeezing, and she wails a sound, pushing back rhythmically into my lap. “That’s right. Milk me good, you tight, stuck-up, little brat.”

Allie sucks in a rattling breath, her sex clenching around me, the orgasm making her blind and mindless. She grinds her pussy down to the base of my shaft and screams, clawing at the sheets, bullied into a climax—and maybe, maybe I shouldn’t be so fucking hot over it, but regrets will have to come later, because my body isn’t giving me any room for rational thinking. I’m not in control as I flatten her to the mattress and ride up and down, plowing my cock deep, watching myself take ownership of her in the mirror, her face bruised, my lips peeled back from my teeth.

Every inch the bully.

And I climax, even as my heart lurches, alarmed by the sight.

Not only the raw, entitled expression on my face, but the picture we make. Allie replete and boneless beneath me while I rut furiously between her open thighs, the flesh of her buttocks jumping with every smack of my hips. I’m so conflicted that when the tide has finished drowning me, I gather her up like a poor man who just found a chest of gold. I gather her up and crush her against me, apologizing thickly, wrapping her in sheets, rocking her side to side.

“I didn’t mean it,” I say hoarsely into her neck. “Not any of it.”

“I know,” she whispers back, kissing my shoulder.

But her reassurance does nothing to relax me. And as nighttime falls and turns the cabin dark, Allie falling asleep in my arms, I worry like hell that I’ve just reminded her of exactly why she needs to leave me in the past.