CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE Family Drama

Brayden—

I rest my elbows on the rail and blow a trail of smoke toward the sky. Now that we’re home, it’s hard to think of anything but Rebel. I feel hollow, knowing she’s so many miles from me. My mind races through how to make this work, but I keep coming up empty. Shades isn’t going to go for any of it.

The clubhouse door behind me opens, and boots approach.

“You know what you’re going to say?” TJ pulls a red swizzle stick from his mouth.

“I’ll figure it out.” I drag in my last bit of nicotine and then jab the butt out, turning toward the entrance.

It takes a moment for my vision to adjust as I stride into the darkened clubhouse. Brothers are scattered throughout, having just finished Church. Glancing to the side, I see Kyle and Rafe watching me from the bar, and I nod in their direction as I pass.

“Dead man walking.” Kyle grins.

To the left, Marcus and Billy stand, pool sticks in hand. Marcus shoots me a quick thumbs-up before Billy whacks him in the head and rolls his eyes. They all know what I’m about to do.

My dad’s going to ream my ass once I tell him what I’ve been up to, but I don’t give a shit. I just want to have Rebel in my arms.

I rap my knuckles on my father’s office door.

“Come in,” he calls from behind it.

I take a breath, readying myself for the fight coming my way, and push through the door.

My father drops some papers he’d been studying when he sees it’s me and leans back in his leather chair. “Hey, son. What can I do for you?”

“There’s something I need to tell you.”

Cole straightens, lacing his fingers together atop the scratched wooden desk. “Okay, shoot.”

I decide to jump right to it. “Clean up wasn’t finished. That’s not why Shades sent us home.”

“What do you mean?” His voice turns steely. His anger seems directed at Shades, but I know that will change the moment I lay it all out.

“We were sent home because of me.”

My father tilts his head to the side, his brow creasing in confusion. “Explain.”

“I met someone before the funeral. I didn’t know who she was, but we continued to see each other even after I did.”

“Who?” His eyes narrow, and his anger seems barely contained. I’m pretty sure he knows the answer.

“We got into some trouble with the Sin Squad, and I had to call for help. The moment we got back, Shades told us to pack our shit and be out by morning.”

“Who was it?” my father repeats, his tone now deadly.

“Rebel.”

He scrubs his hand down his face. “His fucking daughter? What the hell were you thinking?”

Before I can reply, he shoots to his feet, sending his chair flying against the wall. “Dad, I swear I didn’t know at first.”

“You should have ended it the moment you found out.” He points his finger at me. “Shades and I have enough bad blood between us with the past and the shit with the Devil Kings without you adding his daughter to the goddamn mix.”

“And whose fault is that?” I spit, without thinking.

Cole flies across the room faster than I knew possible. He grabs two fists full of my shirt and slams me into the wall, pinning me there.

“What did you say to me?” he snarls.

I shove him off me. “You and him have problems for some bullshit you pulled twenty years ago. Rebel and I shouldn’t have to pay the price for your mistakes.”

“Oh, and the Devil Kings were about me, too?” he roars.

“No, that was about protecting TJ and his woman. I get that. I’d have chosen to kill those DKs, too. But not telling the one club that has good rapport with the Devil Kings that we’re about to take two of them out? That’s on you. You blindsided Shades. You’d have never done that to Daytona or any of the other chapter presidents.”

My dad picks up a bottle of bourbon and slings it across the room. It shatters, and the amber liquor streams down the wall.

“Dad, I care about this girl.”

“Well, that’s too damn bad. Get her out of your head, because that ain’t ever gonna happen. Now get the fuck out of my office.”

I slam the door on my way out, rattling the frosted glass top, and stomp down the hall. Coming into the main room, I notice a trail of brothers watching me. Most don’t know what the fuck is going on, but I’m sure the muffled shouts just carried to them, signaling our family drama.

I keep walking until I’m out the door into the open air, where maybe I can breathe.

Kyle and Rafe follow.

“How’d it go?” Kyle asks.

I slam my fist into the metal door. “Fuck!” I yell. My knuckles scream in pain, the skin already reddening.

“That well, huh?” Rafe chuckles.

I stalk to my bike, gravel crunching beneath my boots.

TJ grabs my shoulder, spinning me around. “Hey, why don’t you stay here for a while?”

I know what he’s worried about. He’s worried I’ll try to soothe the pain with opioids and fall down that rabbit hole. But the only drug I crave right now is Rebel. Unfortunately, that’s not gonna happen. I shrug him off. “No thanks, I think I’ll go drown in a bottle.”

“Brayden?” TJ’s voice carries across the lot, but I ignore him, slinging my leg over my bike and strapping on my helmet. He yells after me as I peel out, sending rocks flying behind me. “Brayden, wait.”

Roaring down the street, I pick up speed as I go, and don’t slow until I reach the Santa Cruz highway. Forty-five minutes later, I’m on the coast. It wasn’t my plan to come here. It wasn’t my plan to go anywhere in particular. I just wanted to ride—ride away from all the troubles, all the reasons why Rebel and I can’t work.

God, I don’t want that to be true, because without her, I’m lost. Before I met her, I didn’t know this feeling. I was blissfully ignorant. Now I can’t go back to pretending the me I was before is enough. It’s not. It never will be again. And that’s the fucking hell of it.

The gas station on the corner thankfully has cold beer, and I grab a twelve pack. Carrying it to the sand, I find a secluded spot where hopefully no one cares I’ve got alcohol, because I plan to drink every last one as I watch the waves roll in. My phone vibrates with a call from TJ, but I toss it to the side, disregarding it.

I chug my first bottle. Then, with each additional bottle, my troubles carry away until I’m numb to the pain.