99. Jax

99

Jax

Finn's eyes were red, and his wolf's power still spilled out of him as he sat stock still in the chair at a large conference table. Food was spread over the table, but it didn't look like he'd eaten any of it. Blood was still dried on his skin, and his clothes barely fit him.

Two submissive wolves hovered uncertainly at the table, and as soon as we walked in, he dismissed them. They'd scurried out of the room like they'd been shot, and the doors slammed shut behind us.

"I cannot be alpha," Finn growled. "Not of this pack."

I met his gaze head on and lifted an eyebrow. "It's a little late for that. You killed the previous alpha and slaughtered anyone who challenged, which, from what I can tell, included her second, third, and at least ten of her top guards."

"I didn't realize that they were challenging me," he said tightly. "Do I have to die to relinquish my new position?"

London, Elonso, and I exchanged looks and pulled out chairs at the table. I sniffed at the food. "Doesn't smell poisoned."

"Everyone who seems to want me dead is already dead or severely injured," Finn growled. "Just eat."

"Not until you do. You're sitting alpha of this land. This is our way of respecting you."

Rolling his eyes and muttering under his breath, Finn grabbed a chicken leg, ripped it off, and gnawed at it while he glared at us. After a few bites, he relaxed, and so did I. He would keep eating now until he was full, and that would help him reign in his wolf.

Elonso spoke first. "Have you toured the pack yet?"

"I had to. It appears Maeve left most of her pack to die this past year. They're starving, and she forced her guards into taking the mutation toxin. Most of them are going to die. Saul is doing his best to get the vaccine to the ones who have the best chance at surviving. There's a fucking mass grave of wolves who have died."

His fury rose with each word, but he stayed seated and kept eating. London spoke next. "What of the warehouses? Is there any food or clothing stocked? Work supplies?"

"I've only seen one, and it was pretty fucking empty. This pack won't survive the rest of the winter."

"Blood Diamond has more than we need. We are willing to cut back this year and share. I will leave Kenzi to act as your support on our behalf, and once we return home, I will send ten percent of our guard to help you fortify the pack and bring you supplies. As much as I would like to see that helicopter burnt to a shell, it will help you bring in emergency supplies."

Finn's jaw dropped. "Did you not hear what I said? I can't fucking do this."

London cleared his throat. "I will leave Damien, my third, and I can also donate ten percent of my guard as well as any extra supplies that we might have."

"I still have need of my second and third, but I will provide a strong wolf to help and five percent of my guard. We are overly stocked, so I'll be able to provide quite a bit of clothes and supplies," Elonso offered.

"You're all insane."

"Finn," I said evenly. "This pack is starving, and you've killed anyone who might be strong enough to lead it. There is literally no one else who can lead it, but you are not a desperate choice. Like it or not, you are Maeve's son and once her heir. Your wolf is incredibly powerful and only growing stronger. You've been part of my pack long enough to see and learn how a functioning pack must work. Our thirds will help provide you with day-to-day logistics. Hopefully Maeve had a few wolves who know how her pack ran who didn't lose their minds under her reign."

"They fucking hate me."

"None of us were loved when we came into power. Alpha transitions are hard. These wolves are literally wired to love their alpha, and usually, those alphas are killed when another takes over. You accepted their bonds on that field, and they gave you their loyalty. Soon, they will learn to trust and love you."

"And if they don't?"

"Then they can leave," London said in a hard voice. "We are unlikely to take any anyone from Maeve's pack, so either they accept you or they accept a rogue lifestyle. You will have to be hard but fair during these first few years. Show no weakness but make them understand that you are not willing to sacrifice any of them."

Elonso cleared his throat. "It will take time for them to learn to trust you. I at least had their respect as their second, but after what Emerson did, it was hard for them to trust me. You have to work hard for it. Take a moment to focus on the bonds running through you. What do you feel?"

Finn bared his teeth. This was why his wolf was running so hot. He was fighting to keep from enveloping those bonds. Once he accepted them, it would be difficult for him to turn his back on them.

"It's all right," I told him. "You were always meant to be here, Finn. Many of these wolves are victims of Maeve. Not willing participants in her ritual for domination. They just want to find a new normal and survive. Breathe and look inward. You'll see that."

Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath.

And whimpered.

"Fuck," he whispered. "They're so weak. She drew so much power through those bonds that most of these wolves have barely anything left. They're terrified. Hungry. Weak. Fearing we're going to execute them for Maeve's crimes. I can feel their panic."

"Use your wolf," I told him. "Soothe them. Not with words but with feelings. Let them know that your power is their power."

For a tense fifteen minutes, Finn sat there with his eyes closed, gripping the table, but then he started to slowly relax. His shoulders dropped and the hardness etched onto his face began to ease.

There was no smile when he opened his eyes, but he looked better. He looked like the old Finn. "Things are quieter."

"Good. Eat. Rest. For fuck's sake, take a bath. I can stay for a few days and help you build a foundation."

London and Elonso both echoed the sentiment, and Finn nodded. He had accepted his duty.

He was Alpha of Indigo Peak.

After eating, we toured the pack with him. A few steps behind him, we showed deference to his station here but also our own power and support. For the first time in as long as I could remember, the mountain was united. We were all allied.

As we toured and talked about where to start with rebuilding Indigo Peak, my thoughts kept drifting back to Anna, and I felt myself growing more and more hollow.

Are we over?

No. No, I would never be over with Anna. As long as she still breathed, she would be mine, and even if she moved to the furthest reaches of the world, I would follow her. I would give up everything for her.

How could I possibly make up for the mistakes that I have made? How could I possibly gain her forgiveness? I'd pushed her away and pushed her away, and just when we were gaining ground, I'd let my own darkness consume me, and she'd lost faith in me.

I'd put her in danger. I'd put our child in danger, and I'd nearly lost both.

My stomach twisted. I still had no idea what she'd done to thwart Maeve. Was she all right? Would she confide in me the horrors she faced so I could hold her until the nightmares were gone?

Or would she never trust me again?

"Jax," London said in a low voice. "You are growling at the kitchen staff."

Immediately, I pulled myself back. A dozen wolves stared at us, frightened. "My apologies. My thoughts are elsewhere," I told Finn. "Please continue."

The staff cleared their throats. "We have access to large herds here, and we used to use the witches to magic the land to provide for the wild game so we could eat fresh all year. With the magic repurposed," one wolf said carefully, "much of the game fell ill. We tried to preserve meat, but our previous alpha believed in eating fresh and shut us down."

Finn frowned. "I believe in eating fresh but also storing when prepping for leaner months. I'll speak to the witches about healing the land once more, but I won't know how long that will take. Do you have the supplies to cure the meat?"

One wolf nodded. Finn looked over at us. "Do I have your permission to use some of your soldiers for an immediately hunt before you leave?"

We all nodded, and the staff looked relieved. It was a band-aid. The news continued to grow worse. Maeve's over-use of magic had stripped the land of natural resources. The farmlands were barren, and the barrier was weak. Those would take time to heal. The natural water sources were also running dry. We would have to ship in immediate water until the land could be healed.

It would take multiple witches to heal what multiple witches had stripped away. We would need Irene, Ava, Janelle, and Lunessa to consult, but even at their peak, they wouldn't be able to handle it. I thought of the imprisoned witch and hoped that there were more willing to help.

Structures outside of Maeve's mansion and the ritual sights were crumbling. They would need immediate reinforcement for the winter months.

Finn was right. There was an immense amount of work to do, and not a lot of strength left in the pack to do it.

We broke away, and I checked on my soldiers. Kenzi and Jenson were healed and tending to those who needed longer to heal. I gathered the strong and sent them out hunting.

Kenzi wrinkled her nose. "Are you really leaving me here in this shit hole?"

"Yes, and you'll enjoy the work. You've been challenged recently because of the obstacles we've faced, but now that Maeve is dead, we should be getting back to normal, and you and I both know you'll be bored. You respect Finn, although you will have to adjust to how you treat him since he is your superior here, and he'll need your support."

"Is Amelia staying behind?"

"Without a doubt. She hasn't requested it, but I'll let her bond with Finn before we leave to ease the transition. She'll be a great help to him." As both warrior and computer nerd, I was going to miss her.

"For how long?"

"At least six months, but most likely a year. Your position will still be open when you return."

"It better be," she grumbled. "I'm not staying here forever. Fucking evil embedded in every corner. It makes my bones shiver."

I knew how she felt. Every time I turned a corner, I expected to see a shadow waiting to take over, but with Maeve dead, most of her followers had lost the motivation to fight.

I waited for Saris to reappear, but she never did. I wasn't even sure if I would ever see her again, but if I did, I owed her gratitude. She'd come to the top of the mountain to fight, despite everything. And the Fae? Well, if they did decide to come out of the woodwork, they would have an excellent ambassador in Saris.

The sun was starting to set again, and a sense of calm settled over the pack. Finn had soothed his bonds, and the land could heal.

Now I needed to focus on healing my own bond.