85. Anna

85

Anna

The further I raced from the territory boundary, the fainter Jax grew within my mating bond. I hadn't taken the time to see if I had darkened it properly. Lunessa, I was certain, was in no mood to share, and if I hadn't left that night, I wasn't leaving. Jax was my weakness.

All I'd had to go on was how it felt with Jax darkened his mating bond when I was with Emerson. I'd studied my mating bond every second that I could, trying to identify just what had happened. I'd never sensed the magic, but that was okay. My magic was intuitive anyway, so I just replicated how it felt.

And I knew it worked because I hadn't felt Jax's panic when I crossed the boundary or even now, even though I'd been gone for almost ten hours. He couldn't feel me.

But I could feel him. I needed to feel him. I needed that reminder that everything he did, he did out of love, even if it was breaking every trust I had in him. I needed to do that so I wouldn't grow to hate him.

Saul had said it was fine for the baby to spend time as a wolf, but he didn't say exactly how long, so after I hunted and ate dinner, I shifted back to human. I'd crossed a river to hide my scent and found an abandoned cabin.

At least, I thought it was abandoned. There was an inch of dust covering everything, but I hadn't survived this long just to die in a cabin that could blow away with a strong gust of wind. I barricaded the door and put simple alerts around the perimeter using the items I found strewn about the counter tops.

None of it was enough to help me relax. Everywhere I looked, I was reminded of my father. We'd bounced around structures just like this. They were prisons. The forest was more comfortable. Dirk had just wanted to make sure there were four walls around me at all times.

Or maybe just a roof over my head.

Tears welled up in my eyes, and I wiped them away. Knowing that at one point in my life, my father loved me and had killed his mate for me fucked with my head. Especially now that I was pregnant and alone.

Would it be forever? Even if I found proof that my child wouldn't kill me, could I forgive Jax? He was acting just like my mother. Stripping decisions from me. Putting our child in danger. Was this how my father felt about her before she ripped away my memories without telling him and bound my magic?

What exactly was Jax's plan for our baby? And it was our baby, no matter what. Emerson hadn't touched me. I knew it in my bones.

Sitting in the corner of the cabin and facing the door, I placed my hand on my belly. Would death follow me wherever I went? What if my baby was also a ternary? Would he be the next victim of a psycho who wanted power?

"The odds are stacked against you, baby, but at one time, my family was nothing but love. They made mistakes, but there was goodness at their core. I know that's going to be inside you too, and you'll be better. You won't make the same mistakes because I'm going to raise you with so much love."

And they couldn't fuck with him because they were all dead. Katherine. Dirk. Evalina. Fresh pain washed over me. The irony was that it was my saving grace. Evalina's death meant that Maeve couldn't complete the ritual. That didn't mean Maeve wouldn't kill me out of anger or help me just to see if she could use my child.

Not ideal.

I had no family left except for the mate that I'd left behind, and we hadn't even shared a mating ceremony.

Was I making the right choice? Seeking out the Darkwyn Coven library to disprove the notions of a moron's last words? Was my relationship with Jax even worth salvaging?

"I could run. We could run," I whispered to my child. "I could work on glamour magic. Change our names, live a simple life, maybe get off this mountain."

But then I'd be arrested by the king. That was the agreement of the exiled mountain. No one born on it was allowed to leave.

"Your father is a good man. A good alpha. If the whole mountain hadn't lost its mind, he'd be ecstatic about you. No matter what he's thinking now, he loves you."

And he'd never get over what he did if he made the wrong choice. He might do anything to protect me, but I knew Jax. He'd be a shell of himself if he hurt our child, even for me.

And maybe the prophecy was right. Maybe I would die. Magic. Childbirth. An accident. It didn't matter. Jax was losing himself. Leaving was the only way to save us all.

Then what? Find the prophecy and go back? Run and go into hiding and try to give my child a chance at a normal life? "What do you think, baby?"

There was no answer, obviously. This was a decision for me and me alone. What I did know is that I would protect this child with my last breath.

Wiping my cheeks, I stood and started to search the cabin for anything useful. I still had plenty of supplies in my pack, but you never knew what you might find. One time, my father found a dead wolf and fifteen grand hiding in the floorboards. I hadn't taken any money when I left. I wouldn't steal from the pack.

I was opening one of the cabinets when I heard the faint sounds of tin clanking against each other. I held my breath. It was one of my perimeter alerts. Three rusted tin cans strung together. It could have been the wind. Or some other critter that tripped over them. Or even a wolf. Just because a wolf was near didn't mean it would attack me.

Glass clanked next. My head swiveled around, and panic gripped me. Opposite perimeter. Two wolves.

Chains behind the cabin. Three.

I dove for my flare gun. Outside, the wolves howled. I was surrounded.

The doorknob jiggled, and then it broke open. Wood from the door and my barricade splintered everywhere.

I fired.