Chapter One

~ Nico ~

"I don't want to do this," I whispered to myself simply because there was no one else around to hear me. I'd been locked in my room a week ago, the door only opening for my guards to deliver food. No one had come in and I certainly hadn't been able to go out.

I was in a prison created by my own family.

I'd always known that my life wouldn't go the way I wanted it to, but I never thought it would come to this. In one month I was to marry the daughter of one of my father's business associates.

Oh, on paper it looked like a good deal. Two elite families of society merging in one glorious wedding that would more than likely be plastered all over the news. With the wedding, not only would the two families merge as one, but so would the companies, my father's and my soon-to-be bride's father's.

One problem, I was gay right down to my toenails. I had no interest in marrying some woman I barely even knew. Hell, I had no interest in marrying anyone.

Well, that wasn't totally true.

There was only one person I wanted to marry and he had been taken from me long ago. The heartache at that loss still lingered, even after almost a decade of him being gone.

I would never forgive my family for what they had done to the man that I had known in my soul would always be the love of my life. Their lies and betrayal had not only taken him from me, but they had made his life hell.

I didn't even know if he was alive or dead. The second he had been taken away, he ceased to exist in my world. I wasn't even allowed to mention his name.

And now, once again, my parents were doing what they thought was right for our family, despite my protests, and throwing me into a new kind of hell.

If they thought they were going to get grandkids out of me, they had another thing coming. I had no intention of having sex with the woman my parents were marrying me, too.

I'd kill myself first.

I'd actually been thinking about that for a few days, and it hadn't been the first time. The only thing keeping from ending it all was the promise Luca had made to me all those years ago that he would come for me.

I was still waiting for him.

Yeah, it was stupid. He probably didn't even remember who I was. While we had grown up next door to each other, our time together seemed so fleeting.

I had been five years old the day we met, ten years old when I figured out that I was going to love him for the rest of my life. When I turned sixteen, he gave me my first kiss...and then my world ended when they took him from me.

I never believed the things people had said about him. He was not the bad boy everyone seemed to think he was. I'd seen his heart and it was pure gold. I just wish I'd had a chance to keep it before they took him away from me.

I didn't bother wiping away the tears that filled my eyes and then spilled down my cheeks. What would be the point? More would just follow. I should have been all cried out, but apparently, I wasn't.

Still, I stiffened when I heard someone unlock the door and quickly wiped my tears away. When the door opened, my mother walked in, a couple of my guards standing behind her.

What? Did they think I was going to attack her or something? As much as I hated some of the things she did—well, most of the things she did—she was still my mother.

"Nicolas."

"Mother," I replied.

"I had hoped your attitude would be better, but I see that I was wrong."

I didn't bother replying to that. What would be the point? Improving my attitude would mean coming around to her way of thinking and that would never happen.

My mother sighed before snapping her fingers. A maid hurried into the room, a suit bag in her hands. She carefully laid it over the chair next to the door before leaving the room.

"I want you to get cleaned up and changed into this tuxedo," my mother stated. "We're leaving in an hour."

"To where?" I asked out of curiosity since I hadn't been allowed to leave my room for a week.

"Does it matter?" my mother snapped. "Just do what I said. And I expect you to be on your best behavior tonight. If you bring shame to this family, your father will be very cross with you."

Yeah, that was never good.

I just wasn't sure I cared anymore.

"No, I won't go."

God, it felt so good to say that.

"You will do what you are told."

I shook my head. "I'm done listening to you. You've never cared about what I wanted or what I think. So, why should I care about you say?"

My mother's eyes narrowed. It wasn't a good look on her. Isabella Rossi had spent a lot of my father's money to retain her good looks, and I had to admit, it worked. She didn't look a day over thirty, which was about fifteen years younger than she actually was.

She snapped her fingers.

I jolted and leapt up when two guards rushed into the room and right for me, darting toward the bathroom. They caught me just as I grabbed the door handle.

I cried out as I was dragged down to the floor and pinned there by a massive weight on my back, legs, and arms. The only thing I could move was my head.

And I wished I hadn't when I saw my mother walking toward me with a syringe in her hand.

"You've only brought this on yourself, Nicolas."

I screamed as she shot the clear liquid into my arm. Almost immediately, it began to burn like lava was shooting through my veins.

"Give it five minutes to take effect and then get him cleaned up and into his tuxedo," my mother ordered. "He needs to be ready to go in an hour."

"Yes, ma'am."

I tried to resist when the guards stripped me of my clothes, but I couldn't get my arms and legs to do what I wanted them to do. It didn't help that everything had a fuzzy hue to it and I felt as if my head was filled with cotton, the room spinning around me.

When I was lifted up, I felt like I was floating on a cloud. That quickly ended when I was set down on the cold tiles of the shower stall. When the water from the hand held shower was sprayed on me, I shivered. They hadn't even waited for it to warm up. The water was frigid.

"Go get his stuff ready," one of the guards stated. "I'll finish cleaning him up."

"Hey, we're just supposed to be cleaning him up and getting him dressed, so no funny business," the other guard said.

The first guard snorted. "Like he's going to remember any of this. He's so stoned out of his gourd right now, he doesn't even know what day it is."

"Just knock it off. I don't want to get fired."

"Fine."

I whimpered when he got closer with the spray nozzle and started washing me over. The water was chilly and he was close enough to make it actually hurt.

The guard snickered as he turned the spray to my groin area. "You're not always going to be this lucky, little Nicolas. I'll get you alone at some point and no one will believe you if you cry foul. Everyone knows you lie."

With my head as foggy as it was, it was hard to understand what he was saying, but I knew it was a threat. I knew if this man got me alone, I wouldn't be able to fight him off and I doubted anyone would help me, or believe me. He was right about that.

Leaving this world was looking better and better.

As soon as I was all rinsed off, the guard grabbed a towel and began wiping me down. My skin crawled every time his bare hand touched me, which seemed way too many times.

When he jerked me up, his hand slid down over my ass. Tears sprang to my eyes at my inability to stop him when he started to slide his finger between my ass cheeks. No one had touched me there ever. I didn't want my first time to be this monster.

"Steve, knock it off," the other guard snapped as he walked into the bathroom. "Mrs. Rossi is going to be up any minute to make sure he's dressed. I refuse to explain to her why he isn't."

"Fine."

I grunted as I was lifted up over the guy's shoulder and carried into my bedroom. I was tossed onto the bed as if I was a bag of potatoes. In the next ten minutes, I suffered more unwanted touches as I was dressed from head to toe for whatever my mother had planned for me.

By the time my mother opened the door and walked in, I was fully dressed, but I was also on the verge of spewing. My stomach was knotted so much, the pain was indescribable. The tears I had shed before were nothing compared to the tears streaming down my face now.

I truly wanted to die.