Chapter Six

In the dim light of the chamber, Elizabeth stepped up to the painting. She had to know who had created the image of her. Had the artist signed the piece? As she drew near, she noted a dark scrawl in the right-hand corner. Holding her breath, she bent close: L.C.

Her heart stumbled in her chest. Why would he do such a thing, and from his memory, unless…? She couldn't finish the thought. Something warmed her inside.

Elizabeth stepped back from the painting with a smile and headed from the room. Since the moment she arrived here, she'd done everything wrong. She'd assumed she had no choice but force the issue of their marriage.

In that moment, a whole new world opened itself to her, a world where she was not destined to be in love with a man who would never love her back. Before she saw the painting she'd had no hope that he cared. But why else would he paint this portrait of her, especially wearing almost nothing at all, unless…?

She found herself going back over it all—over everything that had happened since she arrived. Lucius's words said one thing. His actions said another. The confidence she'd lacked earlier in the day suddenly filled her.

She would fight for a future with the man she loved. She would stay for two more days and expose whatever demons he'd brought back with him to this place. The only chance they had was for him to realize that a new future awaited him if he'd only allow himself to move past his guilt.

In order for that to happen, she had to take another risk. She was not truly the mistress of Midwick yet, but she had to make a lasting impression on Lucius in the next two days. She had to demonstrate her ability to lead the girls wisely. She would be such a proper mistress to his household and his people, and she would show him just how much she cared.

Empowered by her new commitment, Elizabeth made her way downstairs to find the girls had finished decorating the entire manor, inside and out. Greens hung over every doorway, graced the tops of the furnishings, and lined the tables in the great hall. They'd set a brace of candles on each table around the hall as well. When night fell, the room would look like an enchanted garden.

The hall was alive with conversation. Men in tartans of blue and green gathered at the far end of the room. When Elizabeth entered the chamber, Rose hurried to her side.

"Does it please you?" Rose asked, a bit breathless as her gaze shifted from Elizabeth to the men.

"It's magical," Elizabeth replied, her gaze following Rose's. "Are those MacKinley men?"

Rose's cheeks flushed pink as one of the young men at the edge of the group looked her way. "Aye. Our brother brought them here to Midwick to protect us. Isn't it grand?"

"Protect us from whom?" Elizabeth asked with a sudden frown.

"The English. He's worried," she replied with an air of distraction.

Elizabeth chuckled despite the seriousness of the subject Rose had just raised. "And who is the one who can't seem to keep his eyes off you, Rose?"

Another flush of color infused Rose's cheeks as she tore her gaze from the man in question. "Lachlan MacKinley," she whispered.

Elizabeth bit back a smile as she studied the young Scot. His lingering glances at Rose spoke volumes. "Where are the MacKinleys staying?"

"In the stables. Although the stables would be rather dismal in this snow."

Elizabeth's own gaze shifted to the chair she knew Lucius had spent the night in again. "Would they be more comfortable in the house?"

"Oh, aye!"

"Would you and your sisters help me with a task upstairs, then when that's done, help Marie prepare an evening meal for us all?"

"Aye. Lucius must have had a busy morning, because he also brought several of our servants back to us. They are helping Marie in the kitchen right now." The young woman waved for her sisters to join them. "It would be so exciting if we could do something truly special to celebrate our brother's return home."

Elizabeth's cheeks heated as she thought of an altogether different sort of celebration she'd like to have in private with Lucius upon his return. If and when he kissed her again, she would not pull away. "I have an idea," Elizabeth said as the other girls joined her and Rose. "Would you all help me prepare a wedding-Christmastide banquet tomorrow night?"

Five squeals of delight silenced the masculine voices.

Rose's gaze widened. "Did Lucius agree to the marriage?"

Elizabeth forced a stab of doubt away. She could not lose hope. That portrait had to mean something. "Not yet. But he will."

"That's the spirit," Rose said with a smile. "I'm happy to help."

Lily clapped her hands and danced about Elizabeth, her youthful curls bouncing around her shoulders as she did. "Please marry our brother and stay with us forever."

"Having a wedding here would be the very best way to celebrate Christmas Eve." Heather's usually quiet voice was filled with excitement.

"Will there be dancing?" Iris asked with an arched brow.

"I could wear my blue dress." Camellia's gaze shifted to the men. "What a wonderful idea."

"Then let us prepare the celebration." Elizabeth headed toward the stairs with the girls in tow. "Rose, will you see if Marie can spare anyone to help us clean the second-floor rooms? If we work hard, we'll finish just in time to dress for supper."

Rose's smile slipped. She stopped walking, forcing her sisters to do the same. "Lucius asked us never to go up to the second floor."

"Whyever not?"

"I don't think he's ready to face the memories of what our family used to be." She cast a surreptitious glance at Elizabeth. "Peter and Lucius used to rule abovestairs."

Elizabeth brought up her chin. "Sometimes to move forward we have to face the thing that scares us." She offered all the girls a gentle smile. "You let me worry about your brother. Fair enough?"

Each girl nodded in turn.

"I realize I'm asking much of you girls to help with the cleaning, but there isn't the staff to accomplish the task in time."

"We don't mind, Elizabeth. Truly," Rose reassured her.

Heather nodded with a serious expression on her face. "Not if it means having fun later."

Iris frowned. "I hate cleaning, but if you think it will help our brother be more at home with us, I'll help."

"Thank you, Iris, all of you." Elizabeth's gaze passed over all the girls. "Let's think on it as another adventure together."

As Elizabeth climbed each step behind the girls, a sense of joy she hadn't experienced in a long while came over her. She truly would be mistress of Midwick for a while. Whether that was one day or a lifetime, she didn't know. But she was here now and she'd make the most of the opportunity—her first task, to take care of Lucius's chamber and make certain he slept in comfort tonight instead of in that uncomfortable old chair.

By late afternoon, the cleaning was complete. The girls retired to their chambers to prepare for the evening meal. Elizabeth helped each girl coil and pile her hair into an artful arrangement finalized with the additions of ribbons and flowers and jewels in a dress rehearsal for the festivities tomorrow night.

When the girls were satisfied with their appearance, Elizabeth retreated to her chamber to style her own hair. She decided to leave it loose about her shoulders. She held it back on one side with a simple ivory comb.

At the wardrobe, she frowned at her choices. She'd save her best green dress for tomorrow night, but that left only the steel gray broadcloth or the brown linen. She decided on the gray with its simple lines. Smoothing the dress into place against her waist and hips, she accented it with the one piece of jewelry she still possessed of her mother's, a simple silver girdle. She fastened it around her hips with a hint of regret that her father had sold everything else. He'd needed everything and anything saleable to pay off their debts.

Shaking off the past, she palmed the gift she had for Lucius tonight and left the chamber. As she walked toward the steps leading downstairs, she wondered if the new earl had returned home yet.

The thought of seeing him again made her pulse race with both excitement and nervousness, given the way they'd parted last. She started down the hallway and entered the great hall to see the girls were already there and were clustered about the MacKinley men, talking and laughing. Rose was at Lachlan's side. At the sight of Elizabeth, Rose lifted her hand in a beckoning wave.

Elizabeth nodded and smiled. The smile hitched on her lips a moment later when her gaze locked with Lucius's. He stood with a group of men near the hearth. He was staring at her. She could feel his bold gaze sweep from the top of her tawny hair, over her breasts and hips, right down to her slippered feet, before lifting to her face. Admiration shone in his eyes. He said something to the man beside him and moved away, toward her.

Somehow Elizabeth managed to keep her expression serene, but her treacherous pulse thrummed at her temples at his approach. "Good evening, my lord."

"What gave you the idea that you could authorize a banquet tomorrow night without my consent?"

She couldn't read the expression on his face and for a moment it was difficult to breathe. Was he angry with her for continuing to plan their wedding feast or was he teasing her? She couldn't tell. She wanted to explain herself, but he was watching her so closely she couldn't think clearly. She looked away. "I did it for the girls." She shook her head. "That's a lie. I did it for you."

"I know." He touched her chin, tilted her face, and forced her to meet his gaze. "How is your head?"

"Better, thank you." He looked every inch the gentleman tonight. His claret tunic and dark breeches set off his broad shoulders and his long muscular legs. His dark hair was pulled back at the nape with a thin leather tie.

"Lucius, about that kiss…"

He brought his finger to her lips, stalling any further words. "For tonight, let's just enjoy each other's company the way we used to. All right?"

She nodded, then smiled. "You're not truly angry about the banquet, are you?"

He returned her smile. "Once again, you made the right decision. It's Christmastide tomorrow, and it's the perfect way to celebrate." He dropped his hand from her chin and his gaze moved past her to those assembled in his hall. "You and the girls have been busy."

"More than you know." She smiled sweetly.

"You always did know how to pique my interest." He looked at her once more. "But I shall ruin your attempt to intrigue me by not asking you anything more."

"You wound me, my lord."

"I'll make it up to you by being your escort to supper."

She felt a small bit of satisfaction that he'd invited her as though she had the option to say no. "I'd be honored." Together they headed for the dais on the opposite side of the chamber. He seated her first before sliding onto the chair beside her. Once they were seated, the other guests followed them to the table.

Rose and Lachlan sat next to each other. "Rose has certainly taken an interest in Lachlan MacKinley," Elizabeth said, nodding in the direction of the young couple.

Lucius's expression darkened. "She's too young to be entertaining thoughts of that kind."

Elizabeth leaned close to him. "They are older than we were when we first—" Kissed. She broke off her words at his dark frown.

"I haven't adjusted to the fact that the girls have matured while I've been away," he said with a frown. His frown remained in place as the meal progressed, making Elizabeth question whether to proceed with her plans. She clutched the small token all the harder as a reminder he was worth the risk. With luck, the keepsake of their past would soften his mood.

By the time the meal ended, her nerves were taut with anticipation. He moved his chair back as though preparing to leave. Her heart leaped. "Lucius?"

He paused and searched her face.

"Before you go…" She reached for his hand, clutching it with her own, passing the item from her warmed palm to his. She pulled her hand away and waited, hardly daring to breathe.

His gaze remained expressionless as he opened his palm and stared at the rock she'd placed there. "You kept this?" He brought his thumb down to caress the surface where years ago he'd scratched You win. L.C. after she'd bested him in one of their many footraces along the length of the loch.

"I treasured it," she said softly.

Any darkness in his face vanished and his lips pulled up into a half smile. "You were so quick footed then."

"Want to see if I still am?" she teased.

His eyes brightened. He flattened his fingers over the rock. "What about the snow?"

"Too much of a challenge for you?"

His grin became devilish. "I never could resist a challenge, especially from you." He took her hand and started from the room. Then he stopped, his gaze moving to Rose and Lachlan. "Perhaps I should stay."

"They are well supervised by Marie and Hadwell, as well as all the other MacKinleys."

Still he hesitated. "I remember my own thoughts about girls at that age," he confessed. "But you're right. They're safe enough here in the great hall if we're only gone a short time." He started forward until they were in the hallway. Grabbing two cloaks from the pegs by the door, he tossed one around her shoulders before he donned the other. "You may regret this," he said, his earlier good humor in place once more as they headed for the loch.

Light from the full moon reflected off what remained of the melting snow, illuminating the night with a silver sheen. The sound of Elizabeth's excited laughter warmed Lucius to his core despite the chill air stinging his face and neck. Elizabeth hurried down the cleared path from the manor to the loch's edge and took up her position. For a moment, he saw the girl she'd been so many years ago—her muddied hem, her hair pulled back, her face alight with laughter. That image vanished and he paused to appreciate the reality before him.

She was still spirited, but as she hitched up the edges of her gown to reveal her stockings and soft leather slippers he realized she'd become a very desirable woman. A woman who could be his wife if he only let go of the past.

He forced his thoughts aside and joined her. "I'll have the advantage over you with my boots, you know."

"The ground is clear of the snow nearest the loch, and I've been known to run far and fast in these slippers. You're trying to divert my attention. Will you never learn?" she teased.

"Ready?" he asked with a laugh. "To the end of the loch."

She nodded. "One. Two. Three."

On the count, Elizabeth flew across the snow. He ran beside her. She made running appear so effortless. She always could run faster than he could on a sprint, but he could take her every time when they ran for distance. The perfection of the moment washed over him. They'd fallen back into the past so easily tonight: the teasing, the memories, the warmth flowing through him, having her by his side. Joy filled him as he chased after her. No one had ever been able to lighten the darkness inside him as Elizabeth had. She made him feel as light as air, as carefree as a boy, as innocent as the first kiss they'd shared that one warm summer night by the loch.

The thudding rhythm of his heart filled his ears as another more fearful sensation gripped him, consumed him. His footsteps slowed. She surged ahead.

He didn't deserve such joy, and he certainly didn't deserve his old life back. He'd hurt too many people. He stumbled, then stopped.

Her footsteps slowed, then headed back toward him. "Lucius?"

He heard the concern in her voice and turned his back to her. "I can't do this, Elizabeth."

"Race?"

"Nay. I can't give in to my feelings for you." The words sounded loud in the sudden silence of the night. He drew a sharp breath, trying to control the surge of guilt welling in his chest. He felt so out of place, like a ghost moving through the shadows of his own life. Where he didn't deserve to love or be loved in return.

Elizabeth put her hand on his arm and turned him to face her. "We can take this slowly." He looked at the pallor in her cheeks, the haunted darkness in her brown eyes. "Don't you see you deserve to have joy in your life, especially after everything you've been through?"

His mouth went dry. His palms grew damp, and his guilt grew with each inward breath.

"Talk to me," she whispered.

His gaze skittered away to fix on a clump of snow in the distance. The weight of that guilt became a great, crushing pain in his chest. "I've done so many things wrong," he said brokenly. "Things I can never make right."

"We all have, Lucius. You need to put the past behind you and move forward with your life."

"There are too many reminders," he whispered. "Everywhere I go on the estate, everything I see, reminds me of my father, of Marcus, and how I forsook my duty to them both. Then there's Peter." He swallowed roughly. "He was burned to his death because of my choices. If I'd never joined the Templars, he never would have followed me. He'd be alive today if only…"

"Lucius, don't torture yourself over things you cannot change. You cannot deny your father, Marcus, even Peter their own choices, their own lives. They were not your puppets, but grown men with destinies of their own."

He said nothing, simply letting the night and the darkness engulf him.

"Your brothers are gone," she continued. "Your sisters, however, are very much alive and in need of their brother. You said that's why you came home. You wanted to spare them the penury that would befall them if your uncle assumed the estate and the title."

She stared at him, challenged him. "Rose is eighteen. She deserves the chance with Lachlan to see if they can make a match. Camellia, Heather, Iris, and eventually Lily all deserve that as well. They deserve a chance to make their place in this world. Then if after they are settled, you choose to leave it all behind, that's your choice."

He clenched his jaw against the reminder of his duty. "And what of my duty to you?"

She flinched. "It is I who owe you, my lord. Not the other way around. Your family paid my father's debts as a part of our betrothal contract. You own me every bit as much as you own the estate and all it entails."

He owned her. He wanted her. But could he take on that responsibility without crushing her as he had the others he'd loved? Lucius clutched his fists at his sides, fighting the urge to pull her close. He wanted to wrap himself in her warmth and maybe, just maybe, feel like he didn't deserve to be alone.

But he was afraid.

She looked at him, and in the depths of her eyes he saw the pain he'd caused, and something else, something he couldn't name. She kept staring at him, saying nothing. Silence stretched between them, one that began to nibble at his confidence in his decision. "Don't look at me that way."

"What way?"

"As if you know I'll change my mind."

"You will." Her voice trembled just a bit, belying the conviction of her words. Then softer, she said, "We belong together."