15. Everly

15

Everly

T he following Monday was the first official day of spring break, and I found myself walking towards Pandora's Box. Wearing a hoodie and jeans felt strange after so many years in my homeschool uniform. But there was something liberating about it, too. The fabric of my hoodie seemed to hug me in all the right places, as if it was a soft, protective shield against the world.

My thoughts drifted to Cooper. I hadn't seen him since that night, and the memory of his face haunted me. Yet, I couldn't help but feel a flutter of excitement at the thought of seeing him again. The idea made my heart skip a beat, as if anticipating something wonderful and terrifying at the same time.

I stepped into Pandora's Box, the familiar chill of the ice rink hitting me. The place was empty, as usual. My footsteps echoed in the vast space, bouncing off the walls and returning to me like a distant memory. I made my way to the skate counter.

When I reached the counter, Zach was there, his eyes narrowing as he saw me approach.

He leaned against the counter, his blond hair tousled in that effortless way that always seemed too perfect to be real. His blue eyes were piercing, like he could see right through me, and his smile was the kind that could charm anyone, or so he thought. He had the kind of build you'd expect from someone who spent their life outdoors, not confined to textbooks and fanfiction like me.

He raised an eyebrow when he saw me but didn't push further.

"You disappointed me," he said, his voice flat and unyielding. "Stood me up Friday night."

I bit my lip, looking down at the worn surface of the counter. "I'm sorry."

He leaned forward, his gaze never leaving mine. "I've never been stood up before. Now all the guys at my frat house think you're not real. You'll have to make it up to me."

My mind raced. "And how can I do that?"

A smirk played at the corners of his mouth as he leaned in even closer. "I'm sure we can think of something. Are you free tonight?"

"Tonight?" I hesitated, my stomach knotting up. "Um, well…"

"Oh, come on," he pressed. "Unless you have some boyfriend you're hiding?—"

"Nothing like that," I quickly interjected.

"Then you'll come by the house tonight." His tone brooked no argument.

I forced a smile onto my face, hoping it looked genuine. "Sure," I said.

He finally stepped back, satisfied. As I turned away from the counter with my skates in hand, a shiver ran down my spine that had nothing to do with the cold air around me. I took them and headed towards the benches to lace up.

As I tightened my laces, I glanced around, hoping to catch a glimpse of Cooper. My heart raced with every passing second. Would he be here today? Would he still be angry? The thought made my hands tremble slightly as I finished with my skates.

I stepped onto the ice and took a deep breath. The cold air filled my lungs, calming me somewhat. Skating had always been my escape, even if I wasn't particularly good at it. It was a place where I could let go of everything that weighed me down.

I pushed off, gliding across the rink with as much grace as I could muster. Each movement felt like a small victory over my own fears and insecurities. For a few precious moments, it was just me and the ice.

I couldn't believe Zach cared that I didn't show up. He was the kind of guy who seemed to float through life without a worry, always surrounded by admirers. Yet here he was, genuinely upset that I had missed his party. It made my heart skip a beat.

Maybe this was the first step to falling in love. The idea excited me, sending a thrill down my spine. I had always wondered what it felt like to be cared for by someone outside my family. To be seen as more than just the helpless girl.

As I skated, I thought back to Friday night. After getting to Cooper's place and seeing him in such a vulnerable state, I had completely forgotten about the party. Cooper had needed help, and it felt right to stay and take care of him. But I hadn't realized Zach would actually care about my absence.

I glanced around the rink again, hoping for a sign of Cooper but finding none. The empty expanse of ice mirrored my swirling thoughts. It felt strange to think about falling in love with someone like Zach while still being so affected by Cooper's presence.

But what did I know about love, anyway? My life had kept me from experiencing much beyond the walls of our home and the pages of my books.

I took another deep breath, letting the cold air clear my mind. Maybe tonight would give me some answers. Maybe spending time with Zach would help me understand these new feelings inside me.

For now, I focused on skating, letting each glide and turn distract me from the confusion in my heart.

Cooper never showed up at the ice. As I skated around, my eyes kept darting to the entrance, hoping to catch a glimpse of him. With each lap, disappointment settled deeper in my chest. I had wanted to make sure he was okay after what happened Friday. But he wasn't there, and the emptiness of the rink felt even more pronounced.

After what felt like an eternity, I decided to call it a day. My legs ached from the effort, but it wasn't just physical exhaustion weighing me down. I glided to a stop near the benches and unfastened my skates.

Carrying them over to Zach, I tried to push away the thoughts of Cooper. Zach looked up as I approached, his ever-present grin widening.

"Eight o'clock," he said as he took my skates from me. "Don't be late."

"I won't," I promised, hoping my voice sounded steadier than I felt.

"And wear something nice," he added with a wink.

I smiled and nodded.

Even after I got back to my dorm, I couldn't stop thinking about Zach. His easy smile, the way his eyes crinkled when he laughed—it was like he had stepped out of one of my childhood fairytales. Every minute dragged on painfully slow. I tried reading ahead for my upcoming Sociology class, but my mind kept wandering back to our conversation and his invitation.

Dinner time came and went, but I couldn't bring myself to eat. Excitement and nerves twisted in my stomach, leaving no room for food. Instead, I rummaged through my closet, looking for something to wear. My hands brushed past dresses that seemed too formal or too casual until I settled on a navy blue dress. It was slightly shorter than what I usually wore, but its high neck and long sleeves made it feel just right.

I winced as I slipped into a pair of flats. The blisters from Friday night's heels were still raw, only exacerbated by the skating from today, and I didn't want to risk aggravating them further. Flats would have to do, even if they weren't as elegant.

Staring at myself in the mirror, I tried to tame my hair into something presentable. It never quite behaved the way I wanted it to, but tonight it looked decent enough. My reflection showed a mix of anticipation and uncertainty in my eyes, but there was also a flicker of excitement that couldn't be hidden.

I grabbed my phone and checked the time—7:45 PM. Fifteen more minutes until meeting Zach. My heart raced at the thought of seeing him again, mingling with his friends, experiencing a side of life that had always been just out of reach.

Stepping out into the cool evening air, I felt a thrill run through me. This was it—a chance to step out of my life and into something new and exciting. As I walked toward Zach's place, the anticipation built with each step.

Tonight was going to be different; tonight was going to be special. I could feel it.

As I walked toward Frat Row, my thoughts drifted to Cooper. His house was surprisingly close to the frat houses, and I couldn't help but wonder if he was home. If he was, I hoped he was doing okay after what happened on Friday.

The frat house loomed ahead, its facade a mix of brick and wood. Music pulsed from inside, the bass thumping through the walls. Strings of lights were draped haphazardly across the porch, casting a warm glow over the scene. A group of guys lounged on the steps, their laughter carrying through the night air.

I took a deep breath and knocked on the door. It swung open almost immediately, revealing Zach. His eyes raked over me, taking in my appearance. A slow smile spread across his face as he stepped back, allowing me to enter.

"See?" he called out to the others. "She totally would have won Miss Cherry Friday night if she had been here."

One of the guys lounging on the couch smirked. "It doesn't count if you don't pop it."

The comment made my cheeks burn, and I glanced away, unsure of how to respond. Zach just laughed, slinging an arm around my shoulders and guiding me further into the house. It must have been a joke that clearly went over my head.

Inside, the air was thick with the scent of beer and sweat. People were everywhere—dancing, talking, drinking. The music was even louder now; the beat pulsing through my body. I felt out of place, like I didn't quite belong.

Zach must have sensed my unease because he leaned in close, his breath hot against my ear. "Relax," he said. "You're with me. Let's get you a drink."

He led me through the throng of people, his hand warm on the small of my back. We reached the kitchen, where a group of girls were mixing drinks. They looked up as we approached, their eyes assessing me.

"Who's this?" one of them asked, her voice sharp.

"This is Everly," Zach said, grabbing a cup and filling it with something from a large bowl on the counter. "She's cool."

He handed me the cup.

I hesitated, remembering what Holly had told me about drinks at frat parties. But Zach was looking at me expectantly, and I didn't want to seem uncool.

"Come on," he said, nudging me. "Don't you trust me? It was just made right in front of you."

I glanced at the girls who were giggling and drinking, seemingly without a care in the world. They looked like they were having fun, and I wanted to fit in. I wanted to experience the college life I had always dreamed of, the stuff I read about and watched on TV. Plus, Zach would never do anything to hurt me. Not when he cared.

I took a tentative sip. The drink was sweet, with a bitter aftertaste that made me wince. Zach grinned at my reaction.

"Good, right?" he asked, taking a swig from his own cup.

I nodded, not wanting to admit that I wasn't sure if I liked it or not. But as I took another sip, I could feel the warmth spreading through my body, loosening my muscles and making me feel more relaxed.

"It takes some getting used to," he said. "But trust me, it'll help you loosen up."

I nodded, taking another sip. The warmth of the alcohol spread through my body, making my head feel fuzzy. Zach's arm was still around me, his touch both comforting and unsettling.

Zach led me back out into the main room, where the music was even louder. He pulled me close, his hands on my hips as we started to dance. I could feel the beat pulsing through me, the alcohol making everything seem a little bit fuzzy around the edges.

As we danced, Zach's hands started to wander, sliding up my sides and brushing against the sides of my breasts. I tensed, not sure if I was comfortable with his touch. But then he leaned in close, his lips brushing against my ear.

"You're so hot," he murmured, his breath hot against my skin.

I shivered, a mix of excitement and unease coursing through me. I had never been in a situation like this before, and I wasn't sure what to do. But as Zach's hands continued to explore my body, I found myself leaning into his touch, the alcohol and the music making everything feel surreal. My head buzzed, like it was floating, and I couldn't tell if it was from the alcohol or the way he made me feel.

"You know," I said over the music, my words slightly slurred, "there's this place up north where the stars are as big as Christmas lights. I've always wanted to go there."

"Oh, yeah?" Zach asked, his lips brushing against my neck, sending shivers down my spine.

"It would be cool as a first date," I continued, my thoughts spilling out without filter. "Unless this counts as a first date. I've never been on a first date so I wouldn't know."

I was babbling; the words tumbling out of my mouth before I could stop them. My face heated up, but I couldn't tell if I was blushing or if it was just the alcohol.

Zach jerked back, his eyes widening. "Date?" he asked, his voice laced with surprise.

"Yeah," I said, suddenly feeling unsure. "This is a date, isn't it? You like me and I like you. I got dressed up and you're taking me to this party and..."

Before I could finish my sentence, Zach's lips crashed against mine. I kissed him back, my heart racing in my chest. It was my first kiss, but it wasn't like I had always imagined. There were no butterflies, no tingles, no fireworks. None of it.

If anything, it was kind of… sloppy.

Zach led me down a hallway, his grip on my hand tight. I stumbled after him, my head spinning. I didn't feel right. The alcohol was making me feel disconnected from my body, like I was floating outside of myself.

"Was there anything in that drink that wasn't alcohol?" I asked, my words slurring together. "Because I've read about how alcohol affects the body. I had to because Cooper was so drunk Friday, and I wanted to make sure he was okay. But I know that it's not supposed to disconnect my mind from my body. I mean, I know it makes you feel lots of things, but I don't... I don't think it's supposed to be like this."

Zach didn't respond. He just kept pulling me down the hallway until we reached a room. He pushed open the door and led me inside.

The room was small and dimly lit. There was a bed in the corner, and Zach led me over to it. He gently pushed me down onto the mattress, and I sank into the softness.

"Now," he said, his voice low and husky. "If I'm going to win the pool, I need to get you out of these clothes."

"W-what?" I asked, trying to sit up. But my body felt heavy, like it was made of lead.

Zach put a hand on my chest and pushed me back down. "I swear, virgins are so fucking difficult to deal with," he muttered. "But fuck it, I need that crown or Robby won't shut up about it. You're the last one I need."

"Wait, what... what are you talking about?" I asked, my mind racing.

"Will you shut up?" Zach snapped. "Fuck. I can't get my dick hard if you keep talking."

I tried to sit up again, but my body wouldn't cooperate. I felt like I was trapped in a nightmare.

"Zach, stop," I said, my voice trembling. "I don't want to do this."

But Zach didn't listen. He tugged at my dress, his fingers fumbling with the fabric.

"No," I said, more forcefully this time. "I don't want to do this. You're not supposed to do this when you care about someone."

Zach froze, his hand still on my dress. He looked at me, his eyes narrowed.

"Care about you?" he asked, starting to laugh. "You think I care about you? You're just a girl pretty enough to fuck. The guys here do a virgin pool every year, and we divvy up prizes at spring break. You're the last one I need, and I win the pool."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. He didn't care about me? I was just a girl pretty enough to... I couldn't even finish the thought. My mind was racing, trying to make sense of what was happening.

I felt numb. I didn't understand. He flirted with me. He invited me out. Why else would he do that?

"Now," he said, his voice low. "Stop struggling. It'll feel better if you just shut up."

"This isn't how... this isn't how it's supposed to be," I said. My voice was barely above a whisper.

He reached underneath my dress and ripped at my underwear. I froze. Everything inside of me wanted to fight back, but I couldn't. It was like my body wouldn't listen to my mind... or maybe it was the alcohol or whatever else.

"Please," I said. "You... you were my first kiss. This isn't how it's supposed to..."

"Oh, shut up," he said, putting his hand over my mouth. He pulled his cock out of his jeans. "Now, just... fuck... you're not even wet." He pawed at my cunt.

Without warning, he shoved himself inside of me and it felt like he was tearing me in two. I wanted to fight, to push him off, but it was too much and I couldn't do anything. I couldn't even talk.

I closed my eyes, trying to block out the pain. I didn't want to be here. I didn't want this to be happening. But it was, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

I felt tears streaming down my face as he continued to thrust into me. I wanted to scream, to cry out for help, but his hand was still over my mouth, muffling my cries.

I didn't know how long it lasted. It felt like an eternity. When it was finally over, he pulled out of me and emptied himself in a tissue. When he finished, he zipped up his jeans, looking down at me, his eyes cold and empty.

"You're not even worth the prize," he said, turning and walking out of the room.

I lay there, my body aching and my mind reeling. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to process what had just happened. He was supposed to…to like me. But that wasn't how you treated someone, whether you liked them or not.

I knew that much.

I pulled myself up, my legs shaking as I stood. I stumbled out of the room, my eyes blurry with tears. I had to get out of there. I had to get away from him. From this place.

I made my way through the crowded party, my body feeling like it was on autopilot. I didn't know where I was going, I just knew I had to get away.