Chapter 8

CHAPTER EIGHT

GARNER

Since I can't stand seeing you in pain.

As the low hum of Air Force One's engines continued, I closed my eyes against the roughness of his voice. Kenan rarely spoke up, and he never gave me his opinion unless I'd specifically asked for it. He'd always made it clear to me he had strong feelings about his proper place as my bodyman, despite my encouragement for him to be more himself around me.

Knowing his emotions were strong enough to make him break his own rules tonight made my emotions even stronger.

"If you're nice to me, Commander," I croaked, "I won't be able to…"

My jaw trembled, and I clamped my teeth together tightly to stop it.

" Garner ." His voice was calmer now, smooth and reassuring. I couldn't remember the last time he'd said my name. Had I been in law school at the time? The sound of my name on his tongue was my undoing.

An ugly sound escaped my throat as I stepped forward and buried my face in his neck. I wasn't clearheaded enough to think about what I was doing, about how highly inappropriate it was, considering our positions. In that moment, Kenan was simply Kenan, an old family friend. Someone from back home who knew the real me, the man without the intimidating title and impossible responsibilities.

He was a safe haven, and I needed him for that. Desperately.

His arms came around me quick and tight. He made soothing noises, murmuring words about how I was safe with him, that I could let it go. It was okay. I would be okay.

It wasn't okay, but for a few moments, I could let it out, the anguish and sorrow. The guilt. I knew it would be just us. I could trust him not to reveal my weakness to anyone else. Kenan Harper was a vault. He'd proven himself time and time again in his role as my personal aide.

I held on to him like he was a parachute thrown at my sternum as I was shoved bodily out of an airplane hatch.

He smelled both familiar and strange. The scent of his deodorant and shampoo was familiar, but I'd rarely been close enough to smell the musky scent of his skin after a long day.

I wanted more. I wanted to inhale it over and over until I was dizzy with it.

Kenan's hands moved up and down my back, strong and confident. Capable and constant.

I waited for the humiliation to come. It didn't.

"I'm sorry," I said, the words muffled against the hot skin of his neck. But they were lies. All lies. I wasn't sorry. And I didn't regret it. I'd wanted to hold him, be held by him, for a very long time. And now, I'd finally gotten to do it.

How could I ever let go?

One of his hands moved up into the back of my hair and cupped my head, holding me in place in case I suddenly felt the urge to pull away. How little he knew me if he thought there was a possibility of that happening.

"No sorries," he said gruffly. "You're so fucking strong, and you never let it out. Let it out now. Let it out with me."

I stepped even closer, pressing my chest and stomach against his. My cock was already hardening from being this close to him, so I held my hips back to keep from embarrassing us both.

There had been moments during our time together I'd wondered if there could possibly be an attraction from his side, if maybe he was as interested in me as I was in him. But then I'd talked myself out of it. Even if he was willing, I wasn't able.

I was his boss, for god's sake. And not just his boss… I was the boss. The one whose reputation had to be above reproach. The man who couldn't afford to be caught lusting after his personal aide.

I started to straighten up, to step back, but then I felt him shift.

And felt his own hard cock brush against mine.