Chapter 28

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

Y ou Need to Go Find Periwinkle

Macklin

“I need to go after him,” I say, dipping my head. There is no way I can live with myself. I need to fix things with Hayden.

“He’ll be fine. He’s a hothead. When he’s calmer and more relaxed, he’ll see how much you love Ruby and calm down,” she comforts.

“How do you know I love her?” I ask.

“Mijo, do I seem dense to you? You’ve loved her since you were an awkward teenage boy. And she’s loved you too,” Abuela shares.

“How did you know that? I didn’t know that until recently,” I admit. She waves me into the house. I roll my suitcase away from the door. She takes a seat on the couch and pats the space beside her.

“I know because I’m not blind. You didn’t see it because you’ve struggled with your self-esteem,” she says.

“That’s no secret,” I scoff. “My self-esteem is still messed up. I still feel like I’m not good enough for her, even though she wants me to believe I am.”

Abuela sighs. Her eyes are filled with a sadness that tears at my insides, but what can I do. It’s time to lay my heart on the line.

“What does Ruby think?” Abuela asks.

“She’s crazy about me. I’m crazy about her, but what kind of life can I give her? My parents are gone, I didn’t have a proper family to know how to be in one. I’m grateful for you keeping me alive all those years, but Leila was a bitter bitch,” I share, feeling like I can’t hold back anymore. Years of bad feelings pour out of me like a broken faucet.

“You know, when I first met you, I saw this polite, well-behaved kid who didn’t belong with a woman like Leila. You had a kindness in your eyes and a way of behaving that never really fit in our neighborhood where the kids were rough and robberies were commonplace. The reason for that was your parents did a hell of a job raising you with the time they had. You’re kind, honest, and giving. You worry about everyone but yourself. Have you ever spoken to Ruby or Hayden about your parents?” she asks.

I shake my head. “None of us spoke about our parents.”

“Ruby and Hayden didn’t have such an easy start like you. Their father was depressed. He was a hockey player back in Sweden but in America he was nothing, and that didn’t sit well with him. Other than getting Hayden on skates he didn’t contribute much to either of them. My daughter, Carmen, did the best she could with them but she also had issues of her own. When Johan left, she broke. I’m the only stability those two ever had. We weren’t a typical family, but we loved each other. I always taught them to be optimistic and not let life bring you down.”

“You did good with them,” I praise, feeling my cheeks flush for complimenting her.

“I did the best I could, given my circumstances,” she confirms. She exhales and looks at me thoughtfully. “I think you need to speak about your parents, Mack. I think it would be healthy for you and it would be good for Ruby to know about your family.”

“Does that mean you aren’t mad about Ruby and I sneaking around?” I ask, feeling like my stomach is tied up in knots.

“Do I wish you guys felt comfortable enough to come to me? The answer is yes. I saw something between you two on Thanksgiving. Honestly, it made me feel giddy inside. Ruby is the best and you are the best. I believe you’ll be good for each other. Sneaking around is never a good option though.”

“You’re right,” I agree. I’m not going to throw Ruby under the bus and say she wanted time for us to explore things. “I love her so much. I want to give her everything she wants.”

“I know, Mack.” She pats my thigh. “Ruby is a lucky girl.”

“What do I do about Hayden? I feel sick about everything that went down.”

“Give him time and tell him you love his sister. He probably just wants to know that she’ll be loved and taken care of,” she advises.

“But you heard the way he spoke to me. He thinks this is a game for me,” I say, feeling sick about it. I didn’t want to punch my best friend in the face, but there was no way I was going to let him bad-mouth Ruby.

“So, convince him otherwise. Don’t pretend that you’ve been a saint. You’ve had your share of girls. Hayden is protective of Ruby but if he knows your intentions are pure, then he’ll be okay. He’ll accept you two.”

“I just worry that I’ve hurt our friendship,” I admit.

“You guys are family; it will be okay. Now I think you need to go find Periwinkle. She needs you.” With that she winks and walks away.

How does she know that nickname? I don’t ask but a smile spreads my lips, and I shake my head laughing.