29. Kenna

29

KENNA

"If ya don't get on with it or get over it, ya die with it." ~ Archie "Witty" Whitlock

"Are you nervous?" I asked Taylor as we all walked from the rehearsal at The Barn, where both the wedding and reception would be held, to Goodfella's Pizza for the rehearsal dinner, which was only a couple blocks away.

"Yes." She placed her hand on her stomach. "But not about the wedding."

I wasn't sure how many people knew that Taylor was expecting. I glanced around and saw that no one was paying any attention to us. Kane and Remi each had one of Harper's hands, and they were swinging the five-year-old high in the air as they walked.

Kane and Taylor might have only been friends when they conceived that girl and were still only friends, clearly since Kane had just married Ruby and Taylor was marrying Remi, but that little girl was a product of love. They had done an incredible job co-parenting and raising her.

"You're a great mom," I assured my cousin. "And I know Remi is going to be an amazing dad."

When Remi and Ruby Rhodes were growing up, Remi did a lot of the heavy lifting when it came to raising his little sister since neither of their fathers were in the picture. I'd witnessed firsthand how paternal, loving, and protective he was.

"I know." Taylor nodded. "It's just…I wasn't expecting any of this. I had a plan."

"Harper wasn't planned, and look how amazing she is," I pointed out.

One of the things I'd always admired about Taylor was her ability to make a plan and stick to it, no matter what obstacles and roadblocks got in her way, or how much she had to sacrifice. It was like her superpower, and she truly was a superhero, to me anyway. But even superheroes had weaknesses. With Superman, it was kryptonite. Wonder Woman lost her power when she got tied up. Iron Man was out of luck when his battery died.

Taylor's kryptonite was something not going the way she'd planned. She didn't do well with surprises or anything that wasn't scheduled. It's funny because, knowing her personality, I would have never guessed she'd end up being an E.R. doctor and loving it. Talk about an unpredictable environment.

When I asked her about it, she said that it was predictably unpredictable. I loved how her mind worked.

Taylor nodded as a smile lifted on her face. "She is, isn't she?"

All my life, I'd looked up to my cousin. She was gorgeous, smart, driven, and just really cool. We hadn't grown up together. She'd lived with her mom, who suffered from mental health issues, in Massachusetts. Her dad, who was my dad's little brother, was killed in a car crash when she was Harper's age, just five years old. Taylor was in the car with him when he tragically died.

I didn't know a whole lot about her childhood, but I knew it was bad. I'd overheard my parents discussing whether or not they should try and get custody of her more than once. Since she lived so far away, it was difficult, and, as far as I knew, they'd never taken any legal action.

Taylor joined the Navy when she turned eighteen and met Kane at boot camp. When she found out he was from Wishing Well, she told him she had family there. The two of them quickly became best friends.

Harper was the product of a one-night-stand she'd had with Kane, who had been her best friend for years. Thankfully, after they crossed the line, they'd managed to stay best friends.

I hoped that Sam and I would be able to stay best friends. The glaring difference between our situations was neither Taylor nor Kane ever had actual feelings for each other. They both maintained that they loved one another but were not in love with each other.

My problem was that I was hopelessly, madly, and completely in love with Sam. I thought I'd had it bad for him before, but sleeping with him had only made my feelings for him stronger, something I would have thought was impossible.

"How's Sam? Taylor asked.

"What? Why?" I snapped, a little taken aback that my cousin had read my mind.

"Kane mentioned he's back on duty tonight. How is his leg?"

"Oh, um, good, I think."

I hadn't even known that he was back on regular duty tonight. Before our two-night stand, which was how I was mentally referencing it, him going back to regular duty would have been something we talked about. Hell, I used to know what he had for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I knew what new shows he was binge-watching and when he needed new socks because all of his had holes in the second toe, which was longer than his big toe.

Sam used to come over for dinner, movies, and game nights. He was the person I texted when I was bored, if something funny happened, or if I heard new gossip. Between his job in law enforcement and mine working at the Cow, we usually had the scoop on everyone.

I missed him so much.

All I'd wanted to do was crawl into bed, throw the covers over my head, and cry. Which, full disclosure, I'd done more than I'd like to admit this past fortnight.

"Carson mentioned he ran into you at the hospital," Taylor threw out casually.

"Carson?" I questioned.

"Dr. Mathis," she grinned.

"Oh, right."

"He asked if you and Sam were…together."

"What did you tell him?"

"I told him you're not."

Her response was more of a fishing expedition than a statement. She wanted to know if there was anything going on between me and Sam. As much as I wished she could reel in a catch of the day, and I could tell her how I felt about him—that we'd slept together and that I was madly in love with him—I couldn't take the bait and put any of that on the line.

This was a situation I feared I'd have to take to the grave. If I told one person, one would turn into two, then two would become four, and then four would end up being the entire town knowing. That wasn't ‘girl math'; it was ‘small-town' math. If I caved and told my cousin, by tomorrow the entire town would know about what happened between me and Sam. And everyone would have an opinion on it.

I didn't want anyone to have an opinion about me and Sam. It was too…special. Too real. Too raw.

"You're not, are you?" Taylor prompted when I didn't reply. "Together?"

"No."

"Do you want me to give Carson your number?"

For years, I'd wished for one eligible bachelor to show up in my life. Now, in the span of a few weeks, I'd hit the single-man lottery twice. Unfortunately, I had no desire to turn in either winning ticket.

"Um, no, I think I'm just focusing on me right now."

Taylor's eyes narrowed, and I could see that she hadn't bought what I was selling. But before she could call bullshit on me, Kane walked up to us.

"Kenna." He said my name in his professional voice, and he was standing in his on-duty posture.

This was serious.

"What?" I asked as my stomach sank like the Titanic.

"What is it?" Taylor spoke at the same time I did. "What's wrong?"

"It's Sam."

"Sam?" I exhaled as my heart shot up into my throat. "What? What about Sam?"

"He's at the hospital."

"What happened? Is it his leg? Did he reinjure it?"

"He was involved in a traffic collision. The information I have is that Sam was on the side of the highway when he was hit by a vehicle going one-forty."

"Is he okay? Did you talk to him?" I asked as I pulled my phone out of my purse.

"No. Betty called to let me know."

I tried to call him, but it went right to voicemail. I hung up and told Taylor, "I have to go."

"I'll drive you," Kane offered.

"No. It's fine. You should stay here," I insisted.

"Go. Both of you." Taylor waved us off. "Let me know when you hear anything or if you need anything."

I nodded as we rushed back to Kane's brand-new truck, which was parked by The Barn two blocks down. On the way, I tried him again, but again, it went straight to voicemail.

"He's not answering." I heard the panic in my voice as I climbed into Kane's Ford F150. "When did this happen?"

"I don't know. I had my phone turned off for the rehearsal."

I nodded and tried to call Sam again. It went straight to voicemail. I tried to call again. It went to voicemail again.

"What else did Betty say?" I demanded.

"Just what I told you. She hadn't had an update from the hospital. Do you want me to call there and see what I can find out?" he offered.

"Yes!" I exclaimed. If that was an option, I didn't understand why he hadn't already done it.

I was hoping that he'd call on speaker, but instead, he put his air pods in.

"Hi, this is Officer Kingston. My partner, Sam Whitlock, was transpo?—"

He stopped talking, and I couldn't breathe. Why had they interrupted him? Was that bad? Was that a bad sign? What if it was? What if they were telling Kane the worst possible news that anyone could hear? What was I going to do if Kane was hearing the worst possible news anyone could hear?

Tears filled my eyes.

I'd spent the past two weeks avoiding Sam. I'd been so wrapped up in my feelings and not wanting him to know how strong those feelings were, so he didn't feel responsible for them. But that all seemed so trivial now. What if I'd just wasted all that time and I'd never told him how I felt? What if he thought I was mad at him?

"Right. Okay. Okay. Sure, this number is great."

"What?" I asked, before he even disconnected the call. "What is it?"

"They're dealing with an unrelated twelve-car pile-up with two fatalities and over twenty in critical condition. The E.R. is slammed. She doesn't have an update, but she'll call back when she does."

I nodded as more tears fell down my face. Two fatalities. That meant two people's families and loved ones were going to find out that their lives had changed forever. I knew it was selfish, but I prayed that their fate was not going to be mine. I just needed Sam to be alive. I couldn't imagine this world without him.