Chapter Twelve

I clung to Zion's shoulders as he reached one arm underneath my legs and another around my torso and picked me up, propping my weight against his chest. Though Zion was adorably fluffy, his strength didn't surprise me. I'd watched him once in a while, helping vendors and suppliers carry inventory into the back of his shop, not even breaking a sweat.

"I'm sorry," I muttered when the aftershocks from sobbing ceased.

"There is no reason for you to be sorry, Cicek. I don't know who hurt you so badly but my bear wants to put my claws through him. No alpha should make his omega feel like he's some kind of baby-making factory because a person, an omega, a mate, is so much more than that one facet."

He put me down on the sofa and sat next to me, reaching for the box of tissues. Instead of handing them to me, he wiped away my tears himself and then pulled me into his lap, wrapping me up in his delicious scent and arms that wound perfectly around my form.

"You always say the right things. You make me feel like I matter."

His body stiffened. Moving a bit, he stroked his hand down my cheek. "Cicek, you do matter. You are everything to me."

Those blue eyes bored into me, dissolving all my shields. My lips parted, needing to tell him to let me go, but that was the last thing I or my hedgehog wanted.

"Cicek, can I kiss you?"

I didn't answer. Instead, I lifted myself up and with my hand on the back of his head, brought his lips to mine. A moan poured from his mouth and into the kiss. This was what I had been missing. This connection. His large hands grasped my waist and repositioned me so that my legs straddled his hips and brought me closer, face-to-face with this gorgeous alpha.

"I've waited for this," he whispered before taking control of the kiss, guiding my mouth to a position where it felt as though our mouths had melded into a position for the most amount of connection. His tongue moved in long strokes, and each time, my hips bucked as though he were fucking me instead of kissing me. Zion grabbed my hips and tucked my groin closer to his.

I threaded my fingers into his thick brown hair and reveled in the silkiness of it. I'd longed to get my fingers in his hair, my hands on those strong shoulders. I'd fantasized about his round ass and his hard cock driving into me over and over both in my sleep and while I was awake.

Zion broke the kiss and moved his mouth to my neck. I leaned my head back, giving him better access while a moan of pleasure escaped my mouth. I was on fire for this man like I'd never been before. My cock bobbed as he nipped at my ear. Derek had never paid attention to the parts of me that were more sensitive than others and up until now, I hadn't known my ears were one of those places.

The thought of Derek threw ice over me and I started to scramble, moving off of Zion's lap and across the room where I had to brace myself against the wall for balance.

"Cicek?" Zion said, breathing heavily. The evidence of his need punched against the front of his jeans and gods, it felt good to know he needed me.

Selfish, selfish, hedgehog, making this beautiful bear need me when I knew I would never give in.

My lips felt used in the best way possible and they tingled from the kiss. My entire body buzzed with need for him, while my mind fought against it.

"I can't do this, Zion. I can't." I clenched my shirt in my hands, needing something to hold onto, other than my resolve.

"Can't do what?" he asked, hurt lacing his tone. This was exactly what I didn't want to do, hurt this precious alpha. Fuck, what had I done?

"I can't do this," I repeated, motioning between us. "I can't be the omega you want. Having innumerable children and being trapped in a transactional relationship. Under someone's control. Abandoning myself for everyone else only to be forgotten in return. That won't be me."

Zion stood. The hurt on his face drove a stake right into my chest. His eyes shone with unshed tears and when he took a step toward me, I had to take one back or else I would run and throw myself back into his warm arms again. "We're not all like your other alpha," he said softly. "I am nothing like that controlling asshole, Cicek. I thought I had proven that to you."

The lack of anger almost did me in. I had rejected him and yet, he stood, calm and soft as ever, speaking to me gently. There wasn't a harsh or jagged bone in this alpha's body. I should've known he wouldn't scold or be mean to me.

"I…I won't take that chance." I dared not speak his name. If I did, my sliver of control over myself would surely be shred. "You've been very kind to me today and I appreciate your concern but please leave."

"Cicek," he started, but I had no intention of letting him finish.

"Please, Zion." Tears fell the second his name came from my mouth.

"Okay." Zion whispered the words and without another look at me, opened the door and left. Once the lock clicked, I crumpled to the floor in a heap of anguish. Gods, he was my alpha. He was mine and I'd cut him right to the core.

I curled into myself, trying to hold on to the warmth he'd given to me, letting his scent soothe me.

It was all I could ever have of him.