Chapter 33

Chapter Thirty-Three

T atyana sat a meter away from the video screen, staring at her mother and feeling like she was ten years old again.

“Tanya.” Anna lifted her hand to the screen, touching it as her eyes went soft. “I thought they were lying to me. I thought you were dead.”

“I’m a vampire,” Tatyana whispered. “It would probably be better if I were dead.”

“Don’t say that.” Anna’s voice turned sharp. “Tatyana Vorona, you will banish that thought from your mind.”

She closed her eyes and felt hot tears track down her cheeks.

She’d woken earlier to another raging thirst and two more silver carafes of blood. Her body was stronger than the night before, and when she turned the lock in the door, it had nearly broken off in her hand.

“Tanya?”

She opened her eyes, brushed a hand over her cold cheeks, and lifted her chin. “Yes, Mama.”

“You will survive this. And you will come home.”

She nodded but said nothing. She stared at her mother, seeing her in a new light.

There were silver threads at her temples now, and the lines around her eyes and mouth made her look like Tatyana’s grandmother a little more every year.

Tatyana had once thought that looking at her mother and her grandmother gave her a photograph of her future selves. Middle age. Old age. She could see exactly how she would look at each stage of life.

“Look at you.” Anna’s mouth turned up at the corner. “You look so pale.”

“Even more than before.”

Her mother laughed a little bit. “Baboolya would be so happy. She’d never have to remind you to put on a hat so you don’t get freckles.”

Tatyana let out a hard breath. “I wish I had them. I look in the mirror and see a ghost.”

“Stop.” Anna waved a hand. “Just stop it. No more of this morbid talk. You could have died and you didn’t. You should be grateful; it could be worse.”

“Worse than being a vampire?” Listening to her mother’s voice, she felt the urge to sulk like a child. “I won’t be able to see you for months. Maybe longer. I don’t know what’s going to happen to me now. All these people are dangerous and?—”

“Hush.” Anna leaned closer to the screen. “You think , Tanya. You are a planner. You get that from your grandfather, don’t you?”

Tatyana pressed her lips together and nodded.

“Good.” Anna sat back. “You think. You listen and you plan. You’re smarter than all of them. You know that, don’t you?”

Tatyana didn’t know that, but she nodded to reassure her mother.

“For now you take what is offered,” Anna said. “You have people willing to help you, yes? To protect you and give you what you need?”

“Yes. My boss is here.”

“Is he still your boss? From what his people told me, your contract with him was completed and you’re going to be a wealthy woman.”

Oh, why had they told her mother all that? Oleg’s secretary probably thought she was reassuring Tatyana’s mother, having no idea the number of questions it would provoke.

“Mama, I don’t know when I’ll be able to send you money, but?—”

“I already have money in my bank account,” her mother said. “More money than I know what to do with.” She smirked. “I’ll never have to ask Karol for money again. I could buy the whole building and kick Mrs. Lipovsky out if I wanted.”

Wonderful. So Oleg had sent her mother money. Why? There was no telling. Emotional manipulation? Guilt? Maybe it was a down payment for Tatyana’s work.

She rubbed a hand over her face. “I need you to tell me how much money Oleg sent you so I can pay him back.”

“Good luck. He told me it was a small gift for our family’s inconvenience.”

Inconvenience? Was that how he thought of her?

“Just send me an email with the amount and…” Tatyana’s breath caught in her chest.

Email.

Phone.

Computer.

Fuck .

“Can you email me when you’re one of them now?” Anna asked.

She was completely cut off from her work. She was completely cut off from the modern world. “Oh my God.”

“I can see the look on your face, and you’re going to start to panic and go in circles about everything you can’t control, so I’m going to?—”

“I can’t do anything on my own!” She stood up, shaking her arms as a current of itching electricity ran under her skin. “I can’t call you without their help. I can’t email you, and even if I knew where a post office was, I don’t think I could get close enough to it without murdering someone and I already?—”

“Tatyana Otsana Vorona!” Anna snapped at her. “Calm down.”

She froze, closed her eyes, and focused on the water drops pebbling her skin. “I’m breathing.”

“In.”

She sucked in a breath and nodded.

“Out.”

She kept her focus on her mother’s voice and let out a stream of cold air from between her lips. She didn’t need to breathe. She realized that when there was no pressure in her chest as she held the air in her lungs, but the human instinct to breathe hadn’t stopped when her heart did.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

When she was back in control, she nodded.

“Good girl,” Anna said. “I’m going to send you some of my birds.” Her mother’s voice was deceptively calm. “Wouldn’t you like that, Tanya? I don’t think it would be good to send you Pushkin—you know how he gets around strange men—but I’m going to send you some of my lovely birds to keep you company.”

Tatyana opened her eyes and stared at her mother. “What?”

“Won’t that be nice ?” Her mother’s gaze was intent on the screen. “A few of my sweet birds to keep you company while you’re away. A little bit of home. Don’t you think that will be familiar to hear their calls at night?”

Why would her mother send her any of her precious carrier pigeons?

Oh, you idiot, Tanya. Because they were carrier pigeons.

Tatyana sat down again. “You know how much I love the birds, Mama.”

Birds that her mother had trained over many years to fly back to her with a surety few animals possessed. Birds that could carry messages. Birds that maybe a vampire lord would not suspect.

“You’ll be lonely there,” Anna said, “don’t you think? For a whole year I won’t be able to see you. I’ll send you a few sweet pets to remind you of home.”

Pets, not carrier pigeons. The message was clear. The birds’ skills were not to be spoken of, but if Tatyana needed to contact her mother, they would be there.

“There’s a beautiful garden here,” Tatyana said. “I’m sure I can build them a nice dovecote. That way they’ll feel right at home.”

“Good.” Anna touched the screen. “Maybe they can help you think, Tanya. Help you… plan a new future, huh? You have a long time to live now.” Anna’s eyes narrowed a little bit. “It would be a good thing to think about what you want to do now that you have so much time.”

“Yes, Mama.” She swallowed the burn in her throat. “I’ll remember what you said.”