17. Kellen

Chapter 17

Kellen

After Noella left his classroom, Kellen slumped in his leather chair. His body and mind were at war with one another, his body wishing to rest and his mind begging to move, his eyelids pulling shut against his brain’s will. All he wanted was to steal a quick nap, though he felt like, after the insanity and heavy emotion the past hour had leached from him, he could have slept for a hundred years.

The sound of his phone beating on the desk with an incoming call compelled him to open his eyes and prop his chin on his hand so his head didn’t descend back towards the desk. His fingers crawled sluggishly across the mahogany surface and slid the phone over to him, spinning the device around so he could read the caller ID. There wasn’t a name written on the screen, just the image of a pitchfork.

Oh, fuck, not now, he groaned to himself, considering for a half second letting the call go to voicemail.

Answer it, his dragon ordered in his head.

You’re awfully opinionated for someone who hasn’t spoken to me once in the last twenty-eight years. When Kellen received no response from the dragon, he exhaled a huff and begrudgingly answered the call.

“Mother,” he spat in greeting.

“Kellen.” Gods, her voice was infuriating, each word she spoke honed by a sultry rasp, like she endeavored to seduce the world. “I saw you tried to have a restraining order placed against me. It’s adorable you thought that would work, considering you had no proof of any wrongdoing, aside from me trying to walk onto a school campus.”

“A campus you’ve been banned from,” he reminded her, adding, “And I thought your history of being a sadistic cunt would’ve been enough for the court. It slipped my mind that you’ve sucked off the whole Cavalian law enforcement team, so they’ll do whatever you say.” She laughed as though he’d just told a hilarious joke.

Kellen drew the phone away from his ear so he didn’t have to torture his brain with the grating sound.

“Darling, I finished my parole. I’m a free woman. I can go wherever I please in Cavale. You cannot keep me from the school.”

“Yes, I fucking can, and I fucking will. You may be a free woman, but you have no parental claim to the twins anymore. And need I remind you that if you lay a finger on them, as per the court ruling, I will meet no resistance in shipping you off to Terminus for a permanent stay.”

“Yeah…about that court ruling.” He heard her shift on what he imagined was her bed on the other end. “I’ve been speaking with the judge who made the original declaration, and he said the order may be subject to change if the other party, being you, my sweet boy,” Kellen pretended to stick his finger down his throat and mock-hurl, rolling his eyes, “hasn’t complied with the order.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” he growled, nearly crushing his phone. “I have complied with the order. You’re the one who tried to come on campus when you’ve been banned from the school.”

“A stipulation in the agreement was that Jarion and Laya be raised in an environment conducive to the enrichment of their power. Allowing them to remain in a school where a human litters the grounds is not in keeping with that stipulation.”

“That is the most outrageous thing I’ve ever fucking heard.” Watch your tone, Kellen, his dragon cautioned.

I can’t watch my fucking tone, he barked back. She’s being ridiculous!

Doesn’t mean you have to be. Control yourself. Kellen sighed, smothering his hand over his eyes to block out the overhead light.

“What you’re suggesting is false. There has been nothing unfavorable about having Noella Rose at Delmarth. There have been no negative effects of her presence here on the student’s powers.”

“Really?” Miya sounded strangely thrilled, leading Kellen to wonder if he’d just stepped unknowingly into a trap. “Then how do you explain what happened today with your brother?” Kellen’s blood froze in his veins.

“What…how…” How did she know what happened today? How many moles had she sent to infiltrate the school to keep tabs on the twins? Did she know about the staples? Could this really be used against him?

Take a second to gather your thoughts, his dragon advised.

Kellen heeded the warning, sweat forming rivulets across his body. His breaths came in shallow gasps, chest rising and falling rapidly as his fear threatened to pulverize what little remained of his sanity.

“I can assure you,” Kellen said as calmly as he could muster, “whatever you think you know about what happened today, you don’t.”

“Jarion’s dragon took over his body and injured a fellow student.” How the fuck does she know this? he wondered to both himself and his dragon. Miya continued, “Jarion blinded that girl, and guess who was right there with him? Noella Rose.”

“Noella was helping him,” Kellen asserted. “Noella Rose saved him. His dragon would’ve killed him if not for her intervention.”

“How did it get to the point where she needed to intervene, Kellen?” At that, Kellen flinched.

I did the best I could, he thought to himself, not quite believing that to be true.

You’ve done everything right, his dragon reassured him. Now shut this bitch down so we can go grab something to eat. I’m craving meat.

“I am not discussing Jarion with you. You have no rights to him anymore. He is mine. Mine to love and to care for and help, which is exactly what I’m doing by letting him speak to Noella Rose. I dare you to try and prove that Noella’s influence is harmful to the school, because I have all the confidence in the world that you won’t find anything to corroborate that claim. She is a blessing to these kids, and you’ll be making a fucking ass of yourself trying to declare otherwise. I welcome any excuse for the world to see you for exactly what you are.” When Miya replied, she sounded skeptical.

“Sounds like personal feelings might be clouding your judgment, son.” What a stupid thing to say.

“This conversation is over. Next time you want to chat, reach out to my lawyer. I’m blocking your number.”

“ Kellen—”

“Fuck off all the way to Terminus, Mother.” Kellen hung up the phone, tossing it onto the desk.

Good job, Kellen, his dragon prided. You handled that beautifully.

Do you have a name? Kellen asked the voice, gathering his things to shove into his briefcase. His plan for the evening was to check on the twins, then get the fuck into bed and sleep that conversation away.

Cozzeos, the gravelly voice declared. But you can call me Coz.

Are you going to explain to me why you said you’ve been waiting for Noella Rose to make yourself known to me, Coz? Silence echoed down the line. Great. Fucking great. So your help is conditional?

The answer to your question is one you must come to on your own, Coz replied as Kellen trekked through the Varmin sector to student housing. You are my host and I will protect you for as long as the Gods allow us to remain united, but I will not steal from fate in order to help you. That is where my help is conditional.

Then why the fuck did you say that to me if you’re not allowed to speak on it? Kellen grumbled aloud and in his head.

A slip of the tongue. I will work to be more careful.

Yeah, try only sharing things with me that I can ask follow-up questions about. Kellen shut down the line of communication between him and Coz so he could pound his fist against Laya and Jarion’s door.

The dainty pitter-patter of feet advancing on the other side of the door alerted him that it was Laya before her face appeared in the doorway. Her normally bright eyes lacked their peerless glisten and looked bloodshot, from either hours of crying, fatigue, or a combination of the two. Her head tilted to the side to rest on the doorframe, too heavy to keep lifted. She scrubbed her eyes with her knuckles.

“Hey, Kellings,” she yawned into the back of her arm.

“Hey, Laylie. I won’t stay long. I can’t imagine how tired you both are.” His own limbs wept for sleep. “Where’s Jare?”

“Lying down. I got him to eat something, though, so that feels like progress.”

Love filled every hollow in Kellen’s body with abounding light. Gods, he loved this beautiful, kind girl with his whole fucking being, loved her beautiful, stubborn twin with just as much devotion. He would give anything to take away their pain, would trade his own happiness to safeguard theirs a million times over. If it stole every last breath from him to keep them safe from their mother, he’d give it all up, the rest of his life, whatever comes after that, he’d give it all up for them.

Kellen cupped Laya’s face, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “What an angel you are, my perfect Eulaylia.”

Laya beamed, then stepped to the side so Kellen could enter their dorm, shutting the door behind them.

A bulky duvet covered Jarion’s lanky frame, only a glimpse of his curly black hair peeking out from behind the comforter. Jarion raised his head, then twisted his body around when he saw it was Kellen.

“I don’t want to speak to anyone right now,” Jarion murmured through a yawn.

“You don’t have to say anything. Let me speak to you. To both of you.” Kellen situated himself on Laya’s bed across from Jarion. Laya stood in the middle of her brothers, prepared to intercede if need be. Kellen rested his elbows on his knees, leaning forward. “I want to start by apologizing to you, Jare. I never should have told you not to speak to Ms. Rose. Both of you. I was scared about what our mother might do if she found out and was putting my own feelings above yours, which never should have happened. Your feelings come first. What you need comes first. I failed you both, and for that, I’m so sorry. I love you both so fucking much. I only want what’s best for you.”

Laya touched her chest to echo the sentiment, her gaze glazed over in tears. Jarion just blinked at him. Kellen wasn’t sure if Jarion’s deadpan expression was due to exhaustion or simply having nothing left to give.

“This next part is going to be harder to get out.” Kellen swallowed a valuable mouthful of air, releasing it in a rough exhale. “I wanted you to hear this from me. Ariana Sarkis is blind now.”

Jarion lurched upright, ripping off the duvet. “Ari’s blind?” Laya yelled, Jarion’s cheeks now ashen.

“Yes, she’s blind. I’m sorry, Jare.” Jarion’s bottom lip quivered before he flopped back onto the bed, buried his face in his pillow, and screamed, so severely that embers leaked out with the cry and singed the cotton pillow casing, dribbling ash off the sides of the bed. Kellen lunged forward, taking a seat next to his brother, and hugged his shoulders. “She’s blind, but she’s alive, Jare. She’s alive, and she’ll be okay. You can feel this sadness. You can feel whatever you need to feel about what happened, but what we need to focus on right now is making sure you’re okay, too.”

Jarion’s body heaved deeper into his mattress along with the intensification of his sobs.

Kellen didn’t know what to do. He looked at Laya helplessly, hoping she had the answers he needed.

Laya crawled onto the bed, then tucked herself into Jarion’s body, modifying her shape to fit against him. Kellen eased his hands off Jarion when he cuddled closer to Laya. Laya threw her leg over Jarion’s to further entangle their bodies, like this sort of embrace was routine for them.

“This wasn’t your fault, Jare,” she whispered. Jarion lifted his face out of the pillow with a mewl.

“I blinded her!” he shrieked. “Because I didn’t release my dragon, I lost control and blinded her!”

“We’re going to make sure that doesn’t happen again,” Kellen assured him. “Starting tomorrow, you’re going to begin working with Ms. Rose in counseling.” Laya’s eyes widened before her face illuminated with a smile, while Jarion’s jaw fell open. “You will work together to get you to a place where you feel ready to accept your dragon.”

Jarion immediately shook his head, protesting, “But—”

“No buts, Jare. This is what’s going to happen. Accepting your dragon is the safest thing for you, for everyone, and letting you die is not an option. Ms. Rose will help you, and Laya and I will support you in whatever ways we can. How we can help is for you to decide and tell us, Jare. No more telling you what we think you should do. It’s your turn to tell us what you need, okay? Can we commit to that for now?”

“You’re telling me what to do right now,” Jarion snarled, his pupils transmogrifying into tiny flames. “Don’t you see the hypocrisy? You’re telling me you won’t tell me what to do, while telling me I have to go to counseling. I take it you’re about to say this isn’t up for discussion, right? Mr. Kilic?”

“Jare,” Kellen cried, desperate at this point, “ Please —”

“I want you to leave. Right now.” Kellen sighed. He couldn’t fight him. He’d just told Jarion to express his needs, and if he fought against what Jarion requested now, then he really would be a hypocrite.

“Okay. I’m leaving.” He rose from the bed, his eyes flicking over to Laya, her expression one of sympathy.

“I’ll talk to him,” she mouthed, snuggling closer to Jarion.

“I’ll go, but first, listen to me, Jare.” Kellen cradled the side of Jarion’s face, threading his fingers in Jarion’s hair so he couldn’t pull his head back, so he couldn’t avoid Kellen’s insistence and undeniable love. “I love you. I fucking love you, Jarion Ates. You can yell at me and hate me all you want, but it’s not going to make me love you less. It’s not going to get me to leave you. I’m not going anywhere. I don’t want to see you in pain anymore. I agree with everything Ms. Rose said today. There is more out there for you, my love, and I want you to find out what that is.”

He dropped a kiss on the top of Jarion’s head. Jarion extended a tender look, hinting at words and sentiments he didn’t know how to start formulating, for now letting them rest in his eyes.

Kellen released him, squeezed Laya’s hand, and departed the room.