Chapter 18

18

A fter spending the weekend home—because I loved saying that I had a home —it was a bit of a shock to start school all over. The weekend hanging out with my friends had been great, even if Katy was still pretty subdued. I had gone to bed dorkishly excited to go to a new school.

Rhodes joked I was channeling my inner Larkin.

Morning came way too soon for me, the sun prying its fingers through my blinds to wake me up. All I wanted to do was roll over and snuggle back into the cocoon of pillows and blankets, until I remembered why I had gone to bed so giddy in the first place.

For the first time in my life, I didn’t feel terrified at the idea of the first day of school in a new place. I was actually looking forward to being with my pack, and seeing my friends. That helped shake off the last traces of sleepiness weighing me down.

Kicking off my blankets, I quickly stood up and surveyed the mess that was my room. I had gotten seriously into prepping for school last night, going so far as to pick out a couple outfits (because a girl needed options) and get my backpack ready.

And maybe pre-sharpening almost a dozen pencils.

But I definitely needed a shower first.

I opened my door and froze, not expecting to see my mom standing on the other side, hovering at the door like she had been about to knock.

“Mom?” I arched a brow.

She flashed a too-bright smile, her green eyes glittering with energy. “Hey, sweetheart. I was thinking about pancakes for breakfast? Or waffles?”

I blinked slowly, suddenly not sure if I was still in bed dreaming.

She frowned when I didn’t answer, the smooth skin of her forehead furrowed in thought. “Maybe an omelet? I have sausage and bacon, or I can do a veggie one.”

My head tilted to the side. “I can have cereal.” I liked cereal, actually.

Correction: I liked cereal that hadn’t expired months before I ate it.

My former pack had only given us expired boxes with stale cereal inside, the texture more chewy than crunchy.

One of my favorite discoveries had been the cereal aisle when I went on a trip to the grocery store. I had set a personal goal to try every kind of cereal, and so far I was twelve kinds into my goal.

I definitely erred toward the more sugary side, but mostly I loved the crisp crunch when I bit down. Larkin had gotten me to try adding milk to my cereal once, but I nearly choked as the cereal went from fresh to a soggy, mushy mess.

I almost gagged thinking about the way it sat in my mouth like someone had already chewed it up for me. Blech.

“Cereal is so... plain,” Mom replied with a shrug, dismissing the idea. “Oh! I’ve gotten pretty good at crepes.”

I leaned a shoulder against the doorframe, trying not to laugh. “Okay, what’s going on?”

Mom looked down, her expression turning sheepish. “It’s your first day of school. Sort of. I’ve never been able to make you a big breakfast before sending you off to school, so I thought it would be nice.”

My lips parted in surprise. “Mom—”

She quickly waved me off. “It was stupid. I know you’re not a little kid, but... I guess I wanted to give you one first that you should have had growing up. Like a normal, family meal before your first day of school.”

Pressing my lips into a line, I felt the hot sting of tears prick the backs of my eyes. “Honestly? I would love whatever you make, as long as you make it and have breakfast with me.”

She blinked once at me a second before a grin split her gorgeous face. “Deal. And then I can drive you to school?”

“Actually, Remy was going to pick me up,” I admitted.

“Oh, don’t make him go out of his way. Besides, I can even walk you to your first class,” Mom added. She lifted a hand to my cheek. “Don’t want my baby to get lost on her first day.”

My heart stuttered for a second before I caught the teasing glint in her eye. I rolled my eyes. “Ha ha.”

She reached out, running her hands through my hair. “Maybe we should braid your hair, too. Want me to pick out your outfit?”

I batted her hand away with a laugh. “You’re hysterical.”

She winked at me and turned for the kitchen, her long blond hair cascading over her shoulder. “Breakfast in twenty. Move your butt.”

Rolling my eyes, I turned and headed for the bathroom. By the time I emerged from my shower in a cloud of steam, I could smell breakfast. The enticing scent pulled me down the hallway and into the kitchen where I sank into a table at our small breakfast nook.

Mom turned from the stove, passing me a giant plate of waffles.

“Uh, mom,” I started, eying the massive stack with hungry and concerned eyes. “There’s no way we can eat all of these.”

Without missing a beat, she crossed the small kitchen towards the front door. Like it had been rehearsed, a knock sounded a second before she swung open the door.

I nearly dropped the plate I was holding onto the table when Remy stepped inside the apartment, flashing my mom a grin.

“Hi, Ms. Markham,” he greeted warmly a second before his eyes found me. His gaze swept over me, heated and heating.

“Remy,” Mom replied, her tone amused. She looked back at me. “I thought I would invite Remy to breakfast, too.” Her lips curved devilishly as she realized I still hadn’t spoken. “Unless you would rather him not be here.”

Catching onto her teasing, Remy moved back and reopened the door. “I should probably go.” His dark eyes were dancing as he grinned at me. “I’ll see you at school, Skye.”

“No!” I said quickly, almost knocking over my glass of juice.

They both laughed, and while I knew it was at my expense, there was something decidedly awesome about watching my mom and boyfriend getting along. These were the two most important people in my life; I needed them to like each other.

Remy closed the door and kicked off his boots. They were disturbingly huge next to my sneakers and Mom’s non-slip shoes she used for work.

Mom headed back to the stove as Remy came over to join me. He paused by my chair, his hand finding the back of my neck and twisting in my damp hair. Curling it around his fist, he gently tugged my head back so he had access to my mouth.

The second his lips touched mine, flames licked along my veins, heating my blood. I managed to snag a finger on the front pocket of his jeans, but he had already stepped back and ended the kiss.

Mom turned and frowned at me in exasperation. “Skye, let the poor boy sit down and eat.”

She had completely missed his quick assault on my mouth—and my senses.

Rolling my eyes, I let Remy go. He chuckled and sat in the chair next to me. Setting a plate of bacon on the table, Mom finally joined us, sitting across.

The table was small and usually only sat Mom and myself, which meant Remy’s massive frame was tucked close to me. Close enough that he was easily able to rest his left hand on my thigh while he lifted his own glass of juice.

“This looks great, Ms. Markham,” he started. “Thanks.”

“You can call me Addie, Remy,” she answered with a genuine smile. “Ms. Markham reminds me of...” She flinched and I knew she was thinking of her own mother when her lips pressed together. As fast as she was caught in a memory she shook it off. “Just call me Addie.”

I knew Remy hadn’t missed her flashback, and I had told him enough of my crazy grandparents that he could easily read between the lines, but he also wasn’t going to make my mom anymore uncomfortable.

“Okay,” he agreed easily. “Thanks for breakfast, Addie.”

“You’re welcome.” Smiling, she started layering butter onto her waffle.

Remy’s hand squeezed my thigh for a second and then his hand was above the table, holding a knife as he cut into his own food.

As if on autopilot, I crossed my legs, my left hooking over the right so my toes brushed against the stiff denim of his jeans. A small dimple on his mouth was the only sign he noticed I shifted so we were still touching.

My appetite was almost completely gone, and now my entire body was humming with awareness of how close he was. It felt like anytime Remy was near, everything in me wanted to be near him or touching him. It was becoming an addiction that I couldn’t shake.

“Is something wrong with your food?” Mom asked.

Blinking I realized she and Remy were both watching me.

“Just... thinking about the first day,” I managed, picking up a piece of bacon and mechanically starting the chew.

Her green eyes narrowed, her hands settling into her lap.

She definitely was putting on her ‘Mom face.’

Shit .

“Honey, it’s natural to be nervous all things considered,” she said slowly and carefully, her eyes darting from me to Remy and back as she tried to avoid the landmines that were buried in my past.

I swallowed roughly, a partially chewed piece of bacon scraping down the inside of my throat. “No, really, I’m fine.”

Now Mom was openly exchanging looks with Remy.

Since when did my mother and Remy communicate with just looks? First joking and now nonverbal cues?

Irrational irritation spiked in me, my wolf not giving a shit that I was currently jealous of my mother .

“What’s with the looks?” I demanded, my tone definitely sharper than I intended.

Remy’s hand dropped back to my thigh, his thumb stroking against my jeans in a soothing rhythm. “Babe, we know that going to school with your pack is a touchy subject.”

Speaking of touchy, I could use a little more touch a little higher up the inside of my leg.

Whoa.

Whoa .

Where the hell had that come from? I was sitting at a table with my Mom . My mom, who I was currently annoyed at because she was getting along too well with my boyfriend?

Mate , a voice hissed inside of me. A voice that sounded a lot like my pissed off wolf.

Closing my eyes for a second, I shoved down the anger simmering and the prickly awareness that my mate was near me. Touching me.

Heat flashed over me, my senses suddenly consumed with the very male, very warm body of Remy brushing against me.

“Skye,” he said softly, curiously.

The deep timbre of his voice, the way it rumbled in his chest as he stroked my leg was my undoing.

“Excuse me,” I said quickly, standing up so fast I banged my knee on the table leg as I twisted to get up.

“Skye!” Mom called after me.

“I’m fine,” I answered back, heading out of the kitchen in what was nearly a sprint. “Just give me a second.”

I made it to my bedroom and slammed the door shut, leaning against it as blood roared in my ears and my heart thundered in my chest.

What the hell is wrong with me?

Pressing a hand to my chest, I tried to calm myself. Tried to calm the beast pitching a tantrum that would make a toddler proud.

Minutes ticked by. With each minute that passed I became all the more embarrassed by my reaction.

Had I really just jumped up and ran from my mom and Remy like a little kid? Was I actually pissed off at my mom for trying to have a good relationship with Remy? And was I really so completely incapable of controlling my hormones that I needed to physically remove myself from the area Remy was?

Heat crept up my neck, flushing my cheeks for a whole new reason.

This was quite possibly the most mortifying moment of my life.

A soft knock on my door brought a fresh new wave of humiliation.

I wasn’t sure who I wanted on the other side of that door. I owed a massive explanation to both of them, but I wasn’t even sure I understood what was going on with me.

I had suppressed the wolf side of me for so long, that maybe unleashing her the way I had a few months ago triggered some latent wolfish puberty I had skipped past.

This felt like a hell of a lot more than an out of control, hormonal outburst of a young shifter.

“Honey, please open the door.”

Mom.

Relief swamped me. I turned and opened the door quickly and my stomach dropped.

Mom was there, and so was Remy. Their twin expressions of worry hit me like a physical blow.

“I’m so sorry,” I apologized quickly.

Remy reached out and pulled me in, hugging me tightly against his broad chest. His lips pressed softly, briefly, to the side of my neck.

“It’s fine, babe,” he told me, pulling back and tucking a chunk of hair behind my ear. He met my eyes, his clear gaze sharp and probing as he looked at me with a lot of love and a healthy dose of alpha wolf.

“I don’t know what happened back there,” I whispered, looking from him to my mom.

Mom’s lips were pressed into a thin line. She hugged her arms around herself as she watched me, those emerald eyes eerily observant. “I think I do.”

“You do?” I echoed weakly.

Sighing, she looked down at our feet. “I messed up, baby.”

That caught my attention. “How did you mess up? Breakfast was awesome. I’m the one—”

She held up a hand. “Skye, this has nothing to do with breakfast and everything with me being a shitty mom.”

My jaw dropped. “Mom!”

Remy came around behind me, his presence at my back a grounding reassurance that I wasn’t alone. One hand rested on my hip, the light touch centering me.

Mom leaned against the wall across from my door, looking so much older than her thirty-six years. “Honey, the things you saw growing up... the things that happened to you...” She let out a long breath and looked up at the ceiling. “I should have taken you away from there long before last year.”

I sucked in a sharp breath and Remy’s hand tightened on my waist. “I thought we covered this awhile ago, Mom. I don’t blame you.”

“Maybe I still blame myself, honey,” she admitted softly. “At least you had a new environment at Granite Peak,” she went on, shaking her head, “but now it’s like being back... there. Of course you’re going to feel overwhelmed.”

“Mom, that’s not... I don’t...”

I had no idea how to explain myself without revealing the real cause of my freak out a few minutes earlier. It had nothing to do with my past or Long Mesa and everything to do with the fact that I felt like I was losing my mind.

Especially where Remy was concerned.

“I don’t blame you,” I said finally. “And I’m really okay. It’s just... nerves. But I’m going to walk into that school with Remy, Larkin, Katy, Rhodes... all of my friends. My pack . I’m not alone anymore, Mom.”

She nodded at me slowly, but I could still see the swell of tears gathering at her lashes. One blink and they would fall.

Remy shifted closer behind me, his chest brushing against my back. I leaned into the familiar, sheltering warmth of him. His hands settling on me, his strength at my back, was the calming agent I needed.

“Skye isn’t alone anymore, Addie,” he said softly but firmly. “I won’t let anything happen to her.”

“I know,” she replied, gratitude in her voice. “I’m glad she has you now. But it doesn’t change the fact that I failed her for most of her life.”

I opened my mouth to tell her she was wrong, but Remy cut me off.

“Maybe,” he agreed gently, “but you were as much a victim as Skye was. At least Skye had you looking out for her. You didn’t have your mom or anyone looking out for you. I think we can all agree that you did the best you could, and you got her out when it counted.”

Mom pressed a hand over her mouth, trapping a strangled sob there. The tears spilled over.

Remy’s hand slid around my hip and splayed flat against my stomach, his arm tight around me.

“Thank you for saving Skye,” he told her. “You saved my mate, and that’s a debt I’ll never be able to repay.”

“Take care of our girl,” Mom told him, her voice surprisingly fierce, “and we’ll call it even.”

“Always,” he vowed, loosening his hold on me so I could step forward and pull my mom into my arms.

Mom broke down, crying against me. Remy slipped around from behind me, briefly resting a hand on my mom’s back and meeting my eyes over her shoulder.

His eyes flickered to the front door down the hall, and I nodded in reply. I would meet him there in a minute, but right now Mom and I needed this moment alone together to heal a few of the scars that were still bleeding.

He gave me a tight smile, his dark eyes full of compassion and love as he stepped away and headed for the front door to give us privacy.

After several long minutes, her tears quieted and she pulled back. She wiped at the damp spot on my shoulder. “Dammit, you’ll need to change. I messed up your shirt.”

“It’ll dry,” I replied, not really giving a damn about my shirt.

She glanced back down the hallway before giving me a watery smile. “You’ve got a pretty amazing guy there.”

Warmth spread in my chest, but I tried to play it off with a shrug. “I guess I’ll keep him for now.”

That caused her to chuckle, which made me smile.

“I can stay home if you want,” I offered quietly. “We can hang out and talk or whatever.”

She reached up, cupping my cheek with a soft hand. “My beautiful, brave girl,” she murmured, her bright green eyes mirroring mine. “I do think we need to talk more. We haven’t really talked about what happened in Long Mesa much, and I don’t think it’s helping either of us by burying everything.”

As much as I wanted to never think about what happened back in that hellhole, I knew she was right. Remy had been telling me for a while now that suppressing things wasn’t healthy.

“I agree,” I answered.

“But for today? You need to go to school and have the best first day of your life.” She smiled at me, her petite nose wrinkling. “And then I want to hear all about it tonight.”

“Sounds great, Mom.”

She reached over and kissed my cheek. “Now go before I change my mind and decide to never let you leave my sight again.”

With a laugh, I ducked away and headed for my room. I grabbed my backpack from the floor and headed for the front door. I breezed through the kitchen where Mom was cleaning up our mostly untouched breakfast. I snagged a couple of waffles and wrapped them in a paper towel.

“Bye, Mom.”

“Have a good day, honey.”

We grinned at each other, loving this small little slice of normal.

The smile was still on my lips when I turned to see Remy waiting for me at the front door. He opened the door for me and we walked out into the hallway.

As soon as the door closed, I spun and wrapped my arms around his neck. His arms came around me in a hug that left me feeling loved and safe.

“I love you,” I said, pulling back so I could look into his eyes when I said it.

His gaze dropping to my lips for a second was the only warning I got before his mouth crashed down onto mine. His lips coaxed mine open, his tongue stroking into my mouth, exploring and caressing as his hands framed my face.

Breathless and dizzy, I stepped back.

“I love you, too,” he replied, lacing his fingers with mine and tugging me down the hall.