Chapter 17

17

T he phone in my hand only rang for a second before my mom answered, her face filling the screen of the video chat. Her grin was infectious, and I found myself smiling back at her.

“Hey, baby,” she greeted. Her eyes moved around, trying to see behind me. “Where’s your roommate?”

“Taking a shower,” I answered, settling against the pillows at the headboard of my bed. We had gotten back from our impromptu run and all gone to hit the showers, but I was the first out. I’d decided to call Mom as soon as I got back to my room.

“How’s school?” she asked. Her body moved and I could tell she was sitting down, getting comfortable, too.

“Pretty good.”

“Any issues catching up in your classes?”

I shook my head. “No. I think I’ll be fine.”

Her voice lowered. “And how are things with the new pack?”

I bit down on my lower lip. “Really good, actually.”

Her brows rose quickly, but a small, hopeful smile bloomed on her lips. “Really?”

“Yeah, really.” I gave a quick nod. “I actually just went on a run with Larkin and Katy.”

Her hand covered her mouth. “You shifted?”

I was still as amazed by it as her. “Yeah. It took some time, but I got it.”

“How do you feel?” she pressed, eyes wide.

“Good,” I answered honestly. I absently toyed with the wet ends of my hair with the hand not holding the phone. “Mom... I really like it here.”

Her eyes closed for a second and she let out a long breath. “That’s great, baby. I’m so glad. I’ve been worried... We haven’t been apart you entire life, so...”

“Don’t worry,” I assured her. “I’m good.”

She nodded.

“How’s everything in Blackwater?”

I watched as she nibbled her lower lip, obviously thinking about something.

“Mom?” I prompted, narrowing my eyes.

“It’s probably nothing,” she started, keeping her voice intentionally light. “A shifter has gone missing from the pack.”

“Missing?” I repeated. I blinked. What did she mean ‘missing’ ?

“We’re not sure exactly what happened. She wasn’t very active in the pack. A lone wolf who showed up a few weeks before we did. She lived on the fringes of town and kept to herself. Gabriel isn’t sure if she’s missing or just decided to leave.”

“That seems kind of weird.” Now that I had found Blackwater, I couldn’t imagine leaving. I had seen the worst a pack had to offer, and I was pretty sure that I was now seeing the best.

Mom pressed her lips together. “It is. Gabriel sent out a search party, but they couldn’t get much of a scent. And there’s no way of telling when she might have left since she was rarely seen around town. The last time anyone saw her was over a week ago at the café.”

“The café where you’re working? Zoe’s?”

She nodded again. “Yeah. Zoe actually has me managing some shifts for her. She and Michael just found out she’s expecting.”

My eyes went wide and I grinned. “That’s amazing!”

She giggled a little and smiled back. “It is. I’ll be handling the restaurant more now. When she goes on maternity leave, I’ll take over until she’s ready to come back.”

“And you like it?”

“I really do. I even got us a two-bedroom apartment in the heart of town,” she said. The pride in her voice was tangible and nearly brought me to tears. “It’s a few blocks from the café, and it isn’t much, but it’s ours.”

I swallowed around the lump of emotion in my throat. “I’m sure it’s perfect. I can’t wait to see it.”

Our own place. An actual home. Something in my chest swelled to near bursting.

“Only a couple of weeks until you’re back for Thanksgiving,” she chirped happily. “I should have everything set up by then. Zoe and Michael are turning the room I was using into a nursery and offered me the bedroom furniture set at a great discount. The pack has been really supportive. We went on a pack run the other night.”

“How was it?”

A dreamy smile slipped across her face. “I forgot how much fun running with a pack could be,” she admitted. “I missed it, and I’m glad you’re finding your place in the pack.”

“Yeah, I guess I am,” I replied softly.

She sat up straighter, her green eyes glittering. “So? Any cute boys?”

I groaned and leaned against the wall. “ Mom .”

She laughed and shrugged. “Come on. You’ve been there, what? Five days now? I’m sure someone has caught your eye.”

The image of Remy ghosted into my mind before I could censor it. I’m not sure what changed in my expression, but Mom immediately latched onto it.

“Tell me!” she demanded, sounding more like Katy or Larkin than my mother.

“It’s nothing,” I said quickly, feeling my cheeks heat.

“Your lips say nothing, but your blush says something ,” she teased. “Who is it?”

I was still trying to figure out what to tell her, if anything, when the door opened and Larkin came in.

“Larkin!” I called loudly, grateful for the reprieve.

Larkin froze in the doorway, eyes wide. “Hey. You okay?”

“Talking to my mom,” I told her, waving the phone. I flipped it around so they could see each other.

Larkin smiled easily. “Hi, Ms. Parker!’ She gave a small wave, dropping her wet towel on the floor. “Nice to meet you. Skye’s told me a lot about you.”

“Hello, Larkin,” Mom greeted warmly. “She’s told me a lot about you, too. Thanks for being such a good friend to my girl.”

I cringed, but Larkin, sweet as ever, waved her off with a smile.

“She’s pretty awesome to have around.” Larkin met my eyes over the phone as she said it.

I rolled my eyes to keep the real emotion I was feeling at bay.

I wasn’t going to cry again tonight.

Again.

I turned the phone back around. “We need to finish up some homework.”

“Sure,” she drawled, rolling her eyes. “Don’t think you’re off the hook, Skye. I’ll get the truth out of you eventually about this mystery guy.”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll talk to you soon, okay? Love you.”

Her expression softened. “I love you, too, baby. Bye.”

“Bye.”

I hung up and dropped the phone on my bed, falling backwards. I covered my face with a pillow.

“Mystery guy, huh?” Larkin teased.

I moved the pillow to glare at her. “Don’t start.”

She shrugged innocently, backing away with her hands raised. Her eyes glittered mischievously. “Do I know this guy?”

“Shut up, Larkin,” I groaned, covering my face again.

She hummed under her breath but dropped the subject. I could hear her sit at her desk, her pen scratching across the paper as she worked on an assignment.

After a few minutes, I sat up and tossed my pillow aside, reaching for my own homework and trying to push the lingering thoughts of our alpha from my mind.

R emy wasn’t at breakfast the next morning.

He also wasn’t in English class or our English Lit elective. I asked Rhodes, and he said Remy was handling something for his dad related to pack business. Neither he nor Katy seemed concerned, so I didn’t give it a second thought.

At least not until I headed to see Elias after school ended and saw Remy walking out of the office. He was dressed in a black t-shirt, dark jeans, and black boots, his hair messy as if he’d been running his hands through it a lot.

He was distracted, eyes down in thought as he walked towards me.

“Remy?”

His head snapped up, eyes dark and unfocused. He blinked and his attention zeroed in on me.

He smiled, but I could see the effort behind it.

“Hey, Skye.” He glanced around. “Did you need me for something?”

I motioned to the door behind him. “I wanted to talk to Elias, actually.”

“Oh, right.” He nodded and stepped around me. “I’ll let you get to it, then.”

I turned as he walked by me, uneasy. “Remy, are you okay?”

He glanced back at me. Another forced smile. “Yeah. I’m fine. Just distracted.”

“Rhodes said you were handling some pack business?” I asked slowly, not wanting to overstep.

His expression went carefully neutral. “Yeah. Looking into a couple things for my dad. No big deal.”

“I shifted last night,” I blurted suddenly, the compulsion to keep talking to him strong.

His brows rose and a genuine smile curved on his full lips. “Really? Skye, that’s awesome.”

I blushed, scuffing a toe on the tiles. “Katy and Larkin helped. Elias gave me some good advice about bonding with the pack.”

“Can I do anything to help?” he offered. His expression was so open and honest, I wanted to say yes.

I almost said yes.

“I’m good,” I replied finally. “I just thought I would ask Elias about a couple of other things.”

“Okay,” he agreed easily, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans with enough force to push the waistband down, exposing a flat stretch of tanned skin between the hem of his shirt and top of his jeans.

I tried not to look, but it was hard to miss the way part of the muscle curved and dipped, disappearing under the band of his jeans.

Clearing my throat, I looked up and took a step towards Elias’ office. I pointed a finger in that direction. “I should go.”

“Yeah. Let me know if you need anything.” He turned back to leave.

“That goes both ways, you know,” I called to his back. “If I can help...” I trailed off, letting it go with a one-shouldered shrug.

I wasn’t used to being on either end of the help line. Getting and offering it seemed like a foreign concept I could happily get used to.

Not that a guy like him probably needed help from someone like me.

The corners of his mouth hitched up. “Thanks. If I can steal your Lit notes, that would be a big help.”

“Want me to bring them by when I’m done here?” The offer again tumbled from my lips before I could second guess it.

Was I actually inviting myself over to his cabin?

The pack cabin , I reminded myself. Where the whole pack was welcome.

This wasn’t weird at all.

He gave me a grateful nod. “That would be awesome. Thanks.”

“I’ll see you later.” Jesus, when did my voice get that breathy? For that matter, when did the air leave the hallway?

Another genuine grin and he winked at me. “Later.”

I waited until he was around the corner before leaning against the wall and letting my head drop hard against it. Who the hell was I turning into?

The door to Elias’ office opened and his head popped out, his white hair on end. His dark eyes settled on me, wide and curious. He pulled off the glasses he wore, wiping them on his shirt.

“Miss Markham? Did you knock?”

Only my head against the freaking wall.

“Yeah,” I lied easily, pushing off the wall. “Do you have a second?”

He glanced down at his watch. “Several, in fact.” He opened the door and waved me in. “Come in, come in.”

I followed him through the maze of stacks to his desk, taking the seat across from him again.

Elias sat down, gathering some papers and moving them to the side before bracing his forearms on the beat-up desk. “How can I help you?”

I dropped my eyes, pressing my lips together, suddenly embarrassed.

“I did it,” I started quietly, my eyes lifting. “I shifted.”

A smile broke across his weathered face, a single dimple appearing in his left cheek. “That’s wonderful! How did it feel?”

“Really good,” I admitted. “I tried doing it on my own, but it happened last night. Katy and Larkin were with me, helping me.”

His snowy brows raised. “And how did your wolf react to your pack mates?”

“Calm. She had fun, I think. We ran for a while.”

“And now? Can you sense her?”

I narrowed my eyes in thought. “Yeah. She’s definitely there, but it feels kind of... muffled?”

He nodded sagely, leaning back in his chair. It creaked in protest. “That’s to be expected. The more you let her out, the more you bond with her and your pack, the stronger and clearer your bond will be.”

“I hoped it was something like that.” Relief swept through me that I was finally on the right path.

“You must keep practicing,” he encouraged. “Now that you’ve established a link, you mustn’t let her slip away from you again.”

I crossed my legs, leaning back. “It’s almost like when I first shifted—the bond, I mean.”

“The first shifts can be a very volatile time for a young wolf. Lots of hormones and emotions... It’s hard to keep them in check. I suspect it was even more of a challenge for you since you had to always be on guard.”

“I told Katy and Larkin everything that happened. About Long Mesa?” I bit my lower lip.

He looked surprised. “That’s a fairly big step towards trusting your pack.”

“They were both really understanding about it,” I said, picking at the hem of my blue shirt. “Supportive, I guess is the best word.”

“I’ve known both girls since they were children. I would expect nothing less. The Blackwater pack has a very strong reputation in the shifter community. You and your mother couldn’t have picked a better pack to seek sanctuary in.” He gave me a kind look. “Gabriel is a great Alpha, and his son will likely surpass all of our expectations.”

“He was in here earlier, right?” I frowned, remembering how off Remy had seemed in the hallway.

Elias sighed. “He was. As a young alpha, much is expected of him. I offer guidance when I can.”

“But he’s okay, right?”

Elias smiled fleetingly. “I would not betray your confidence, nor would I betray his.”

I flushed, feeling like a total idiot. “Of course. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”

His head cocked to the side. “You care for him.”

I coughed, choking on air for a second. “He’s a nice guy. He’s been really... welcoming.”

Welcoming ?

I mentally face-palmed.

He chuckled softly. “Yes, he’s definitely one of the more hospitable alphas we have on campus.”

I let out a long breath. “Anyway, I just wanted to give you an update on my shifting and to say thank you.”

“It was truly my pleasure, my dear,” he responded. “Hopefully I will get to see your wolf amongst us one day.”

I snorted, remembering what Katy had said last night. “Apparently, I’m just like Remy, except backwards.”

His eyes narrowed carefully and he leaned forward slightly. “How so?”

I waved a hand. “He’s all black with a white star and my coat is all white with a black star. Weird, right?”

He gave a curious hum under his breath. “Long Mesa packs don’t have any black coats in their lines. Black is a northern and European color.”

I blinked slowly. “Um, okay.”

“It’s definitely curious,” he said, mostly to himself.

“A lot of wolves have similar coats and markings,” I said with what I’m sure was a confused look. I shrugged. “It doesn’t mean anything.”

His gaze drifted to the corner of his desk where the book with the wolf and the star on the cover sat. “Markings used to mean a great deal in the old world. It was a way to distinguish from an early age what a pup might become. The role he or she would play in pack dynamics.”

Laughter bubbled out of me. “Seriously?”

His smile was faint. “Maybe it is a bit of an old wives’ tale.”

“More like my mom has a pure white coat and my dad had some black markings in him somewhere.”

“You don’t know who your father is?”

I shook my head. “No. My mom has never said.”

“You’ve asked?”

I gave him an incredulous look. I was a seventeen-year-old girl. Of course I had asked who my father was on more than one occasion. Mom shot me down every single time.

“She won’t tell me. She’s only said that we were better off in Long Mesa than with him.”

A troubled look crossed his face. “She believed you were safer in your former pack than with your birth father?”

I sighed. “I’ve tried to get her to tell me about him. Anything about him. She either gets really angry or shuts down. I barely mention it anymore. Besides, my mom is enough. And it’s not like word of what she did didn’t spread like wildfire throughout the shifter community,” I pointed out. “If my father wanted me or her, don’t you think he would have heard about the war in the south over what she did? Wouldn’t he have come looking for her?”

“Perhaps,” he allowed. He folded his hands over his stomach and studied me. “Would you be willing to tell me if your mother ever divulges the truth?”

I raised my eyebrows. “Um, sure? But can I ask why?”

“I told you I’ve spent my life dedicated to studying shifters and pack dynamics,” he reminded me, waiting for me to nod. “I’m curious as to what would pose a bigger threat to you than your uncle and your former pack.”

Also something I had wondered. Anytime I realized that Long Mesa was the good option, I got nauseous.

“If she ever tells me, I’ll let you know.”

Elias still seemed troubled. “Female shifters are becoming rarer in our society. It’s perplexing why she would hide you away to be an omega.”

He seemed to still be thinking aloud to himself, but it didn’t stop my anger from igniting. “She didn’t hide me away. She tried to leave with me when I was little, and my uncle threatened to kill both of us. She got me out before they could .. They made me an omega.”

Elias startled as I all but growled the last sentence. He looked instantly apologetic. “Forgive me, Skye. I meant nothing by it. I’ve spent the last decade trying to increase the population and carelessly let my thoughts wander.”

I was still tense, my hands curled around the armrests of the cushioned chair I sat in.

He held up his hands, trying to appear non threatening. “Shifter population is rapidly declining, and it’s due to the fact that fewer and fewer females are being born, and those who are born, are only able to bear one, perhaps two, children if at all.”

I frowned, thinking back to what Zoe said. “I thought true mates could have more children.”

He nodded quickly. “Yes, but the odds of finding a true mate are decreasing with the fertility rate. It’s been nearly a year since a true bonded pair found one another in the United States. Some packs haven’t had a child born into them in over a decade.”

My eyes narrowed. “That’s how it was in Long Mesa. There hadn’t been a baby born in nearly a year when we left.”

“But in packs like Blackwater, there are numerous pups. Women become pregnant frequently, and even the odds of a true mate bond are more apt to happen.” He seemed genuinely excited. “I’ve been working on a hypothesis for this for the better part of the last three years.”

“And?” I waited for his explanation.

He hesitated with a sigh. “It’s a very rough theory, you see. Untested and untried.”

I huffed out a breath. “OK. It’s not being published in any shifter medical journals next month, I get it.”

He smiled at my sarcasm. “It’s the Alpha female.”

“Alphas can’t be female,” I said after a heavy beat of silence, for the first time wondering if Elias was all there. “The Alpha is always male.”

His hand settled on the book on the corner of his desk. The wolf and star book. “It wasn’t always so. True mates, especially the true mate of an alpha, are meant to live in a different sort of harmony than other bonded mates.”

“You’re losing me.”

“It’s like sound waves. True bonded mates operate on a higher frequency than a basic bond. A forced bond operates on the lowest frequency.”

“Like a radio station?” I was barely following his train of thought.

Elias stood up suddenly, coming around behind his chair and resting his hands on the back. “Precisely.”

If this guy hadn’t given me sound advice about tackling my inner wolf, I would seriously be considering recommending he be evaluated.

Magic and radio stations.

Right.

“If you look back in pack history, instances where the alpha of the pack is in a true bond with his mate, pack fertility rates rise.” He waved a hand. “Compare your old pack and your new pack. Blackwater is filled with children. Its Alpha female has birthed four children. There are talks of expanding the town because of the rise in population.”

My brow furrowed. That was news to me. Blackwater definitely had the highest population at GPA, and being in the town a few times before I left, I had seen a lot of children. The entire vibe of Blackwater was so vastly different from Long Mesa that I didn’t think about it too much.

His eyes were bright. “You’re seeing my point, aren’t you?”

“It’s definitely a theory,” I conceded.

“I need to keep working on my research.” Elias moved back to his chair, reaching for his stack of papers again. “But I believe there is a direct link between fertility amongst pack females and the Alpha’s pair.”

Huh.

I stood up. “Well, I’ll let you get back to your research.”

Elias was already reading a paper when I left his office.

I still wasn’t sure if he was crazy... or onto something.