Chapter 38

Chapter Thirty-Eight

A mid my grief, I felt Tallon move behind me, pulling the door closed, though the stench of death still burned in my nostrils. He did not try to pull me to my feet, instead sinking down beside me and resting his hand at the nape of my neck.

"Stay out here, my wolf. I will go in," he murmured. I did not have the energy nor the desire to fight him on his proclamation. He pressed a kiss to the side of my head and then the smell wafted out once more before the door clicked shut.

My hands were trembling, my breath shaking, and my entire body seemed to want to implode on itself. All of this for nothing. I had no family left, and nothing to show from the hell I experienced in that castle. Now, I would never be able to prove myself worthy of their love, to convince them to change their minds and see me as a sister rather than a caretaker. I'd lost my only opportunity, carried away on rivers of blood that came from the same magic that Tallon and I had wielded to make our escape.

The door opened again and Tallon exited, pulling it tightly closed. This time, he did pull me to my feet and settle me onto the bench just beside the door, kneeling in front of me on the cold stone. "I am sorry, Odyssa."

"How long?" I croaked, my voice hoarse with tears that would not fall. I finally brought my gaze up from my hands to Tallon's face. "How long has he been dead?"

He sighed, rubbing at my knee through the blood-stained dress I still wore. "Two or three days perhaps." With his other hand, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a folded piece of parchment. "This was on the nightstand. It's addressed to you."

"Did you read it?"

"Yes."

"Should I read it?"

He hesitated. "At some point, yes, but right now it would only hurt you."

I bit down hard on my lip in a failed attempt to keep it from trembling. My vision blurred and the tears finally spilled out, along with a choked sob.

Tallon cursed, shifting closer to me and wrapping his arms around my waist. "I know, my—" He faltered for a moment. "If it helps any, I don't believe he ever intended for you to read this letter. There were ones there addressed to your mother and brother as well."

"What did it say, Tallon?"

He sighed again, clearly not wanting to tell me. After a moment, he stood and sat beside me. "He blamed you for your mother, for Rhyon, for himself. He blamed you for everything that ever went wrong in his entire life. He said you ruined his family, and that as far as he was concerned, he had no sister."

It was nothing I hadn't expected, but hearing the words from Tallon's lips rather than Emyl's hurt far more than I'd ever expected. Surprisingly, no tears came this time. I was numb mostly. I'd known my brother's feelings toward me, had known them all his life, but I'd hoped I could change them. I'd hoped that by saving him, even if I couldn't save Rhyon and our mother, that I could have proven myself to him.

Tallon pulled me into his lap, tucking me beneath his chin. As if he were reading my thoughts, he murmured, "You were always worthy of their love, Odyssa. And they never should have made you feel like you had to earn it."

"I only ever wanted someone to love me. To have a family that loved me. What does it say that I could not meet their expectations? Could not earn their love?"

"That they were not worthy of your love. You gave yours without condition, without falter, and they withheld theirs from you out of some petty attempt to get you to do more for them." He lifted my chin and the unwavering love in his eyes made my mouth drop open. He smiled as I realized what the look in his eyes truly meant. "Does it not mean more to have someone love you when they are under no obligation at all?"

"You cannot love me, Tallon," I protested. Yet, even as I said it, I knew that if he pushed me to describe my feelings for him, there would be no word more appropriate than love. "We only just met, though, and you are the herald of a god . I am…" I shook my head, trying to understand what my heart and mind were screaming at me.

"You are everything," he supplied, tilting my head up to press a lingering kiss to my lips. "And do not presume to tell me how I feel about you, Odyssa. I know you feel the same, even if you cannot say it yet." He kissed me again. "You have always been worthy of love, and Veressia will always know what you did for them in that castle. You are good , my love."

My answer was to press another kiss to his lips, pouring everything into the kiss to show him that yes, I did love him, too, or I would love him, given more time.

"Well, this is charming." An amused voice startled us both apart. At the stoop stood a tall man with gray-streaked black hair, slicked back neatly to reveal his prominent cheekbones. He tugged on the lapels of his coat, black wool and heavy against the morning breeze. His eyes were dark, yet alive and churning with silver flecks. The wicked smirk across the man's lips was familiar, but I couldn't place it.

"Who are you?" I asked warily as Tallon shifted me off his lap and put himself between the stranger and me.

Tallon sighed as he stood. "Why are you here, Kalyx?"

"I have been waiting for months for you to be freed from that accursed place," the man—Kalyx, God of Death— said. He rested a booted foot on the bottom stair and peered up at Tallon. "Did you truly think I would not come see why you lingered here rather than returning immediately? I am a curious man, Tallon."

"You mean you are nosy."

"That as well, yes." Kalyx leaned around Tallon to smile at me, the mirthful smirk replaced by a genuine and warm smile. "Hello, Odyssa. It is very nice to finally meet you, my dear."

I looked up at Tallon, watching him pinch the bridge of his nose and shake his head. Suddenly, the pieces fell into place and I knew why that smirk and those eyes had seemed so familiar. I saw them every day in the mirror. Tallon's previous words came to mind. "Is this what you meant before, by your suspicions about my magic?"

"Yes. I wasn't certain until now, though." He looked between us. "Seeing you both here, together, it's undeniable you're related."

"You suspected?" Kalyx asked, raising a curious eyebrow at Tallon before looking back at me. "It seems we have a bit to catch up on."

"Pardon me for being bold," I said, remembering my manners, "but can you confirm our suspicions? I am related to you, aren't I? That is why my marks and my magic are so prominent compared to other survivors?"

"Yes, my dear. You are my granddaughter."

"Oh." Hearing it aloud made it far realer than the suspicions I harbored for only a moment, and just like that, my world was upended once more. He had to be my father's father, as I'd met my mother's parents once when I was younger, before they'd died. I'd never known my father, had never asked about him after learning he'd abandoned my mother. I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to ask about him now. My ears rang, and I swayed slightly from my seat as the information sank in.

"You did not come here for me," Tallon accused, his arms tightening around me. "I would have brought her to you when we returned and you know it. Why are you here now ?"

"You and I will be having a conversation privately, Tallon—be sure of that." Violence flashed in Kalyx's dark eyes. "You made that foolish bargain and look what has happened because of it."

I jumped to my feet, wrenching myself from Tallon's embrace. "Do not blame him for that. You cannot seriously expect me to believe you could not have intervened if you wanted to. You left him there to be a puppet for the crown, so you cannot blame him for what they made him do."

The rage in Kalyx's eyes extinguished as he turned his gaze on me. "You are right, of course. Though had Tallon simply told me what he was seeking, making that bargain could have been avoided in the first place." He eyed us together, gaze landing on my hand wrapped around Tallon's. "I suppose it all worked out in the end, regardless."

I chewed on my lip, debating if it would be proper to ask about my brothers and mother, if they were in the Beyond and if they were happy, at peace.

"They are not," Kalyx replied, looking at me. He waved a hand. "Apologies, it's one of my powers. If someone asks about the dead, I hear it. Your family is not at peace in death, because they were not at peace in life. Though from what I am hearing from Tallon, that is a fitting punishment."

"I—" I didn't know what to say, how to react. Tallon's earlier words echoed in my ears, but it was hard to dismiss the God of Death telling me my family was not at peace. "Can you help them? Please?"

His eyes turned sad. "No, my dear. They brought upon their own afterlife in the Beyond. I am the overseer, the guardian of the Beyond, not its master."

"You are too good, my wolf," Tallon said, pulling me into his side. "Think of those you have saved; think of the lives you have changed even in that castle."

"They are my family," I stressed.

"Am I not your family?" Kalyx asked. At my sharp look, he shrugged. "Perhaps I overstep, but it seems to me that I carry about as much significance to you as you carried to them. And that does not a family make." He climbed the steps slowly until he stood in front of us on the small porch. "Death is inevitable, Odyssa. Focus your efforts on the living, not the dead. Remember them, certainly, but your life is your own now."

"And I suppose you have ideas on how I should live it." My voice rose. "My father, your son , abandoned my mother when she was pregnant. Abandoned me . What right do you have to have any ideas on how I should live my life?"

"My son is dead, Odyssa. That is why he abandoned your mother and you. My son was a fool, and an arrogant one, but he would not have left you behind if he had a choice. He was thrilled when he learned your mother was pregnant. He came home to tell me, and then, well, his past caught up with him before he could reach me." Kalyx's eyes—my eyes—were sorrowful.

"Tell me about him," I demanded. Of all the things I'd considered when thinking of my father, that he'd wanted me had never been one of them.

"In due time," he said with a bow. "Perhaps once we are in the Beyond." He smiled then, looking eerily like Tallon when he had an idea that he was pleased to be sharing. "And of course I have ideas on what I'd like you to do. I want you to come home. You are not the only one who has been searching for a family. I have made do with my heralds, with Tallon here especially, but they are not my blood. I'd like to pass on what I can, to help you learn your powers and grow into your magic." He stretched his hand out to me. "If you'd allow it, of course."

My head snapped up to look at Tallon, searching for his opinion. He shrugged, an easy smile on his face. "I was going to call in my favor to have you to come with me to the Beyond, regardless. It is your decision, but know that I do want you there with me." Kalyx cleared his throat. Tallon rolled his eyes and added, "With us."

"Now what will your favor be?" I asked. It should have been a sign, how easily he could redirect me from my confliction about my brothers and mother, how easy it was to forget them when I was with him.

"Perhaps I shall save it for another time."

"Please save the flirting for later. She is my granddaughter, Tallon," Kalyx sniped, his lip curled back in feigned disgust. It fell back into that warm smile. "So, will you join us in the Beyond, Odyssa?"

"I will stay with Tallon?"

"Of course."

"What will be expected of me?"

"Absolutely nothing you do not desire for yourself. You are not a prisoner, nor under my employ. You are my heir, and you will have free rein over the Beyond and those in it."

I turned to Tallon once more. "Sylviana will be there?"

" This is where she has been?" Kalyx spluttered. He narrowed his eyes. "Damned creature."

Tallon smiled widely. "Yes, she will be there. And don't mind him, he is just upset she favors you now. She is Kalyx's favorite."

I only hesitated for a moment. After all, I did want to learn about the magic I now wielded, and I was not ready to leave Tallon's side. Not now, when we were just discovering ourselves together. And there was nothing left for me in Veressia now. Nothing I could not live without, at least. "I will join you, then."

Kalyx clapped. "Wonderful. Shall we be off now then?"

"The castle," I remembered. "Once everyone is out, can you seal it permanently? They have instructions to throw the keys in the river, but I would feel far more comfortable if it was sealed with magic so that no brave fool could break in with brute force later."

"Of course," he said easily. "Now that the bastard prince is dead, he has no hold over the magic there. I can do whatever you'd like with it."

I wanted desperately to ask about the magic in the castle, if it was a bargain Eadric had with Cethin after all, but it didn't matter anymore. If it was gone, and Kalyx could seal it off from anyone ever entering again, that was enough. "Do it."

"And what will become of Veressia without a leader?" Kalyx inquired.

"They've been without a leader for a long time now. They will survive."

"Very well." He bowed lowly. "I shall seal it off once all have vacated it."

Tallon clasped my hand and nodded for Kalyx to proceed. We followed him down the stairs, away from my former house, which was now little more than a tomb. I jerked to a stop, needing to do one last thing before I left.

"What is it?" Tallon asked as I dug into his pocket.

Emyl's letter clutched in my hand, I climbed the stairs and propped it on the door handle. I did not need to read it, did not need to see his venomous goodbye in his own handwriting. "Goodbye, brother."

When I returned to Tallon's side, I slipped my hand back in his and squeezed. He pressed a kiss to the top of my head and returned the squeeze. A cold spot appeared near my hip, and I looked to see Sylviana had joined us. Tallon huffed a laugh and called ahead to Kalyx, who was tapping his foot impatiently. "We are ready now."

Kalyx waved his hand and a portal opened there in the street, revealing the Beyond inside, framed by whorls of black so similar to Tallon's and my own magic. Despite the apprehension pitting in my stomach as I studied the craggy black rocks visible on the other side of the portal, I stepped through with Tallon without fear.