Chapter 12 | Hazel

Chapter 12

Hazel

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We parted ways with the Birds of Zorn, though I knew the demise of their previous lord would not stop the gray deeds of their nefarious trade, but I hoped that with new leadership, whoever that would be, there would be a change for the better. Belder, it seemed, didn't need our help in the way we had previously anticipated. She was staying with them of her own choice, and went willingly to Krelis because of an outbreak of what they called the molt fever.

Both Yueril and myself knew better that many krelins were dying and the fever had nothing to do with molting, or anything natural. We made the decision to use our last reserve of the Ganpan-Fal to save the planet and kept some samples to research a way of making the nanobots replicate more efficiently before the Solungors could have a chance to try again in the future.

I stood in the lab, looking out at the stars beyond Estreldez, on the farthest moon, Bina. Behind me the doors opened with a wheeze, and a warmth of power made my loh react with a glow of their own. I knew without turning that the Almder entered the room, and I doubted she would have come herself, yet here she was.

Taking a deep breath, I hardened myself to face her, and stilled. She was more stunning than I could have imagined. I'd never seen her outside of the sculptures depicted of her. They didn't do her justice. Her hair was long and braided like a netting across her white strands. Her loh were colorless and bright like clear flawless crystals. Her back loh extended out from her shoulders like lethal wings, putting my own loh to shame. She was like a moon goddess and I could feel my knees grow weak, like I should kneel before her. I held strong, refusing to bend to her powerful presence. She had much to answer for.

Yueril gave me the space to handle this on my own, though, he was just in the other room if I had need of him. Just the knowledge that I could rely on him if necessary gave me the strength to do this. To face her.

She touched her lithe, long fingers to her crown where a green loh was placed. The strong, stern look I was expecting from the leader of Estreldez crumbled as tears welled in her icy blue eyes. Her lip trembled.

She plucked the small loh from the crown and pointed to my birthmark just below my collarbone. "May I?" she asked carefully.

I wasn't sure what she was doing, but I nodded, unable to refuse her. She placed the small loh in the deep green dark spot my mom said was where I lost a loh during my spawning. The Almder sniffled and choked up as she saw how the loh fit the shape of my mark.

She picked up my limp hand and placed the loh in palm, wrapping my fingers around it and replacing it, along with her hand covering my fist back to the mark.

"I took this loh, above where your heart beat, thinking it was the closest I'd ever get to you before you returned to the great rock. They told me you did not survive." She sucked in a quivering breath.

All thoughts of how I would handle this meeting vanished. If she did not know that I was living near the mountain, or even that I was alive...

My heart crumbled and bled for her, for us, for the time we've lost, but then Ordin's words returned to me, that she had banished her own mate, and stripped him of his mating loh.

"Is it true?" I forced out, ruining the moment, and taking a step away from her for more clarity of thought beyond the emotions roaring through me.

She blinked away her tears and stared at me with a soft bewilderment at my question and the way I retreated from her.

"They told me you died," she said, appearing stricken that I would not believe her, but that wasn't what I meant.

"Ordin," I tried to jog her memory, and her lips pursed in displeasure.

"If it was up to him, you would not exist at all," she snipped, and the aura of authority and power of being a leader that had to make a tough decision sharpened her features.

"You sent him away to become a monster," I forced the issue.

"I did what I had to do," she dismissed, a hard line to her mouth as she wiped at her tears with the heel of her hand. "I'd lost many offspring and found out that it was because of him that they returned to the rock instead of standing beside the both of us today. I banished him, took what was mine, and I'd do it again today if given the choice."

I didn't understand and she could see the confusion in my eyes and her eyes softened like she had raised me my whole life. "He did not tell you that he was the reason the offspring died? Unable to accept his responsibility even to this rising." She chided.

"He's dead," I couldn't help myself but to add.

She gave a curt nod of acceptance and continued, "I couldn't bring myself to do the deed, but it is what he deserved for murdering our offspring. Every time he found me swollen with life, he went to the mountains and plucked the poisoned root of arnut to add to my meals so I would bleed the offspring from my body before it could thrive."

My jaw slackened at the idea that someone would do such a thing, but Ordin spoke of how he believed the Almder was killing herself to have another offspring. Perhaps he thought he would save her by making sure she didn't conceive? I shook my head as another horrifying realization struck.

I didn't wish to say it out loud, but living on my own for so long, I wasn't able to censor my thoughts as I processed them, "What if, he never poisoned her food... but someone else did, or even an accidentally contamination of the food supply that kept making her ill, also leading to the miscarriage of offspring... Perhaps, no one was to blame, or someone else entirely? How does she know it was him? He was so certain that the offspring was what was killing her..."

"Have you been able to have any other offspring?" I finally asked her, louder this time, as it was now my intention to be heard.

She shook her head in the negative, appearing appalled by the idea that someone may still be poisoning her, or there really was a contamination that could be affecting more than herself and potential declines in offspring from others in the clan.

"I'll have my brightest investigate further, if you feel I've misjudged Ordin," she said with a sad smile, but the way she shook her head told me she didn't believe it was an issue, and even if it was, she had no regrets for what she'd done to her mate. The words of Vareo lingered in my mind that all leaders are capable of dark things. "As my only living heir, you will stay and learn what you must to lead our clan," she added, like she was simply discussing what kind of minerals to eat for dinner.

"I'd like to learn from your scientists here, on Bina, on how to help with the potential contamination, and medical technology, such as programming nanobots," I blurted out before she could dismiss me.

"Of course, My Jewel, anything you desire," she easily agreed.

"I'm mated," I added.

"Yes," she said with a smile. "It is blessed news should your union bring offspring to the clan. And I've already agreed to your mate's terms that your identity remains secret until we are certain no one will harm you again. It was his only stipulation for allowing you to stay with me. Of course, practically, I am granting him a stay as your mate, but he must remain on Bina, aside from approved visitations within the clan. His species would not do well on the mainland, the moon’s rays would not suit him when amplified by tarnpul. I won't have my son-in-law shrivel up before giving me offspring to dote over."

I blushed at the idea and absently placed my hands over my stomach with yearning.

Before I realized it, Yueril was entering the room and kissing my forehead. I didn't know how long I had stood there daydreaming of what kind of offspring we'd have together. Would they be more like Yueril, with scales and a tail? Or would they be more like me with bright loh, and five fingers? My eyes grew wide... would they be bald with scales? I shook my head. The idea of not having any hair at all was odd to me, but Yueril was more than fine without a single hair on his body. And what a body it was, I thought as he scooped me into his arms.

"What thoughts are stirring in that head of yours?" he asked.

I didn't want to worry him with thoughts of offspring we may never have, so I frowned, unsure what to say before I settled on avoiding the question all together. "Are you sure you're alright with your crew leaving without you?"

"Belder is a fine commander. They will survive without me," he assured and then placed his large hand over mine, which was somehow still resting on my stomach. "Our future will survive too."

I smiled at that. It was the best way to think about things. I had a future now, with him, and a very important mission to figure out the next steps with the nanotechnology that saved our lives for now, but for how long? Whatever happens, we'd face it together. Lifting his hand in mine to my lips, I whispered, "The fate of the stars are here. It all starts with a whispered prayer. Our future will survive."

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