Chapter 25

25

Joanna laywith Spencer on the bed, his large, magnificent arms around her waist, her back firmly pressed to his front. She was warm, sated, and happy. She gently ran her fingertips up and down his forearm.

“Were you in pain?” she asked. “Did I hurt you?”

“No, nurse.” He kissed her temple. “You made it all better.”

She chuckled as she traced his hard, bruised muscles. The candle flickered peacefully. The night was dark, and quiet, and Joanna had a feeling they were the only two people left in the world. Could this please last forever? Just him and her, melted into one being.

She felt complete.

“What did the duchess say?” asked Spencer, and the bubble of peace and happiness burst.

Joanna tensed. Right. Of course they couldn’t stay like this. She had a villain to catch, a sister’s honor to protect, a brother’s future to rescue.

Reluctantly, she freed herself from his arms and sat at the edge of the bed. He still lay on his side but pulled up his pantaloons, his head propped by his arm, watching her with soft, dark eyes.

Questions whirled at the back of her mind… What did this mean?

Spencer had come to make sure she was not hurt, or so he said. Was that true concern? Or was it just an excuse to find the information he was seeking?

Would Spencer break their alliance or keep his word? Did he not want to stop their affair? What about Penelope? He still hadn’t truly answered her question about whether or not he loved the duchess. He had come for Joanna even though their deal was completed, told her all these things, but didn’t say a word about marriage. So did he want her as his mistress? And if he did, would she agree? Agreeing to that meant she’d be, once again, that obscure, invisible woman. Someone he wouldn’t love enough to put at the center of his life.

She was not that woman anymore.

She stood and faced him, crossing her arms over her chest.

Once again, the nagging feeling, that suspicion she’d had when he suggested they be allies. What if he was just using her? He did all those nice things for her…called her beautiful, the only one, and said how he was completely in her power.

And yet, those were words. He was still not offering her marriage. That was what a gentleman would do in his place. A man who called her all those wonderful things would marry her. If he really believed them. If he wasn’t lying.

“Is everything all right, Joanna?” he asked, a touch of concern on his face.

“Fine,” she said.

Whatever he had in mind, she was a woman of honor and would not break her word to him. She still believed they were a team.

But part of her just couldn’t shake off the suspicion, the warning to be careful. It was all too good to be true with Spencer. The compliments, the protection, the building he gave her… She had given him her virtue. Was he just buying her body? Why was he not committing to her if he truly didn’t want anyone else, including Penelope?

“My aunt,” started Joanna reluctantly, “she said my uncle has a manufacturing facility in Springfield that supplies guns to the American army.”

Spencer sat up. “What?”

“It’s still money he’s after,” she said. “By aiding the Americans, he’s protecting his monetary interests, which are much greater than the money he gets for espionage.”

Spencer stared into space, then ran his fingers through his hair. “Good God…”

Joanna nodded and looked at her bare foot. She picked at a little hole in the wooden plank with her toe.

“Anything else?” asked Spencer, looking at her again with a frown.

She nodded. “I managed to secure her help. She will find the deeds of the properties and send them to me. She also agreed to testify.”

She expected him to say “well done” or at least be happy she’d managed this important step; instead, he jumped to his feet and paced the room, limping a little.

He growled a curse. “I’ve never hated the man as much. All that just for money! How much does one need? The guns that killed the men I grew close to were likely made by Ashton. Oh, he will pay.”

“It is horrific,” she said, confused, “but is that not something we already suspected? Money?”

“Yes. But it’s the guns.” He let out a long sigh and shook his head, leaning against the back of the chair, his head hanging between his shoulders. “After I was injured…there was a young man, Sam Holter, who was studying under the surgeon. He took care of me and my wound. When I lay delirious and hot from rot eating my wound, he didn’t leave my side. He was from Whitechapel and had learned folk medicine from his grandmother. He said he always liked healing but never had an opportunity to learn. On the ship, he could follow the surgeon and learn by doing. He had a fiancée back in Whitechapel. He was about to marry the girl the day after he was press-ganged. Had he returned home, I would have sponsored his education so that he could go study medicine at a university. He had his whole life ahead of him.”

He shook his head, his fingers wrapping around the back of the chair, his knuckles whitening.

“It was our last battle near Boston when he was shot and killed. And now I know it may have been done by a gun made by Ashton. Perhaps he also gave information about our position to the enemy. The whole habit of press-ganging is so completely unfair. I do not know how it is legal at all. It’s incredibly unjust to force anyone into a war they don’t want, as if their lives don’t matter.”

Joanna watched the shadows of torment play across Spencer’s face, each line and crease dark with grief. Tears welled up in Joanna’s eyes as she walked over to Spencer, who had released the back of the chair and was hunched over and staring blankly at the ground. She placed a gentle hand on his shaking shoulder. “I’m sorry, Spencer.”

“I had to be the one to tell his fiancée the news. I found her in Whitechapel. Told her how much the lad loved her. Gave her some money. The navy wouldn’t have paid her since they were not yet married. But they should have. So I did instead.”

Joanna didn’t remember if she’d ever seen Spencer like this. She’d seen him after the nightmare. She’d seen how much hatred there was in Spencer’s gaze when he saw Ashton. She’d seen him when he’d told her about the atrocities of his life on the ship.

But this… This bottomless darkness in his eyes, the expression of cold murder and destruction was something she was afraid to look at.

“Spencer,” she said. “He’ll be avenged soon. We’re so close.”

Spencer shook his head, something manic in the depths of his eyes. “Close is not enough, Joanna. We must act. Get those deeds today. With first light, we go there. Start the criminal proceedings right away.”

“But she asked me to wait!” Joanna protested, a tight worry and panic twisting at her gut. “She knows we only have two days left. She’ll send the footman!”

This was not the agreement! They were supposed to be a team.

That worry, that panic set her doubt on edge, made it bigger than ever. He was going to betray her, that voice…that gaze… He looked like a snake coiling in the corner to strike its deadly blow.

Seeing nothing but his enemy.

Not seeing her. Forgetting her.

Like people always did.

“What about me?” she asked, her voice shaking.

He frowned and looked at her, blinking in confusion. “You?”

“Indeed. I only have two days left to change Charlotte’s and Gideon’s situation for the better! I must first present the evidence to Ashton and persuade him to relinquish his hold over Charlotte, to restore Gideon’s rightful deeds, and to amend his will to favor my brother. Only then may you proceed with full vigor to initiate criminal proceedings!”

His face fell. “That is out of the question, Joanna.”

There it was, the cold, twisting sensation of dread. He was going to betray her. She was right not to trust him. “What? Why?”

“Because it’s dangerous!” He straightened and looked at her with his eyes wide. “Things have changed. It has taken too long already. There are men following me relentlessly. They attacked me yesterday. This puts my life, your life, and my family in danger.”

She scoffed. “We can still confront him first.”

“No.”

“Because then you will never get your vengeance, will you…? Because that is all you care about. But that’s not what we agreed on! Please, give me the letters, Spencer. I will go and negotiate with Ashton first. Then, after he gives me the deed for Gideon and tells His Highness that my sister is not available, you can start the criminal case.”

But Spencer looked at her darkly. “I will not allow this.”

The dread was spreading in her chest to a complete, awful realization of how right she was.

“You will never put me first, will you?” she whispered. “You want to lie with me but not marry me. You want to use me to get your revenge, but you won’t honor our agreement and my interests. You tell me I’m the only one you think about, and yet all you’re thinking now is of yourself and your own agenda!”

He frowned and shook his head. “No, Joanna, what are you… It’s him, he’s dangerous…and I can’t…I can’t—”

“You can’t what?” she said, furious. “You can’t give me the letters?”

Resolve hardened his face. “I won’t give you the letters. I won’t let you go and see him.”

Tears were blurring her eyes. “And you won’t marry me.”

He swallowed hard, pure panic in his eyes. “I—I can’t, Joanna.”

“Can’t or won’t?” she scoffed. Rejection burned her like acid.

What did she expect? She was not Persephone and he was not Hades. He was not looking for a queen.

He was just looking for a female to satisfy his physical needs. She was not good enough to be his forever.

“I knew you couldn’t be trusted. How could have I believed you!” she cried. “So, what was all this between us? Nothing but a means to reach your goal?”

Something died in his eyes. “Same as I was to you.”

Oh, how wrong he was. Oh, how wrong. She loved him. And was stupid enough to give him everything. Her loyalty. Her support. Her body…

“You told me you were a scoundrel,” she spat out. “I didn’t think you were a cruel one. You can keep your publishing house. Keep your letters. Keep anything you want. I do not want to have anything to do with you.”

He held her eyes for a while, agony burning in his dark depths. He nodded, straightened his pantaloons, picked up his coat, and walked to the door.

As he opened it, he looked at her, opening his mouth to say something, but then changed his mind.

Nodded to her.

And was gone into the darkness.