Chapter 14 - NamidJayce

Chapter 14

Namid

The past six weeks have been surreal.

As far as anyone else is concerned, nothing has changed. Jayce is still who he's always been - one of the town's golden boys. A man who quietly lives his life, keeps to himself, and helps the community. I'm still who I've always been - a vaguely acceptable outcast who Jayce has recently taken pity on by employing me a couple of days a month. Jayce and I still meet at the shop every other Saturday for an hour or so while I work through his books, and every Saturday, we wander outside with our coffees when the weather is nice, but with winter starting to shorten the days and bring down the temperatures, we've spent more days inside than out.

In reality, the whole world has changed. Jayce and I are inseparable. On the days it's too stormy to walk through the park with our coffees, we no longer eat brunch at the shop. Instead, the one of us whose turn it is to buy picks up pastries and drives to the other's house. We make coffee at home and curl up on the sofa together, licking stray sugar from one another's lips.

I still have dinner with Ken a few nights a week, but now, Jayce joins us. He's fit with us from the moment he came to help us clear out the old cabinets, and these days, the three of us feel like a family. We cook together, laughing and talking about how our days went, sharing movies we love, and debating about the appropriateness of pineapple or mushrooms belonging on pizza. Jayce and Ken talk about football while I sit quietly and listen to their words and soak up the warmth of their emotions. I had no idea life could feel this way. Jayce still misses Jordyn, and Ken still misses his wife, Katherine. There are moments when the darkness of grief swims to the surface, and they have to fight to push it back, but it's mostly a soft, quiet thing that lives in the background of their souls. They are both lighter than I've ever known them to be.

Jayce and I spend most nights curled up in each other's arms, and on the rare occasion we sleep in our own separate houses, I miss him. I miss his smile and his eyes and his strong body pressed against mine. I know he misses me too. When he sees me for the first time after we've spent the night apart, I'm in his arms before I even realize he's closed the distance between us. His palms run the length of my spine while he grins and kisses me like he's just opened a gift on Christmas morning.

Every night we spend together surprises me. Each one is unique. Neither of us has ever had a real relationship before, and while neither of us is sexually inexperienced, we've only ever had quick fucks to dull the need. We don't want it to be like that when we're together. I don't think it ever could be, but we've been intentionally taking the time to experience every single thing together. We touch and taste and slide bare skin against bare skin, learning how to take the other apart and put them back together with fingers and tongues and words. Every time we're together, we learn something new. Some new secret spot on the other's body that's erogenous or ticklish. A slightly different, strangled moan as a head falls back. The sound of my name whispered in a rough, gravelly voice, choked off in a way I've never heard it before. Stars and supernovas explode around us each time we fall into pleasure-filled oblivion together. There is still so much more to learn. So many things to try. So much time to be together.

I've learned a lot about Jayce over the past six weeks outside of our beds as well. There are times when he laughs and jokes and rambles about nothing for hours, and I imagine it's how he was in his youth, before life brought him so much loss. He's witty and quick to tease me with dirty jokes and sexual innuendos and a smile so wide that it causes small wrinkles to appear beside his eyes. He's passionate and romantic, and anytime we're together, he's always brushing his fingers across mine or slipping his hand onto my back. There are times when he's quiet for long periods, but it's never awkward. It's filled with peace and gratitude, and we're both content to enjoy all of the small things life has to offer together.

It's quiet as Jayce and I sit curled up on my small sofa, watching the flames dance in the fireplace. There is a storm raging outside my cabin, and we can hear the wind whispering even through the thick walls, but there's nowhere else I'd rather be.

Jayce is thinking right now, not about anything bad, and it's not like I can read his mind, but he feels contemplative. I don't ask. I know he'll talk when he's ready.

"You know that gallery in Seattle that sold a couple of my pieces a few years ago?"

"Mmhm." I'm engaged, of course, but I'm comfortable and lazy as I curl tighter into his side and mumble my response.

"They've been on me for a while now to get them some more pieces, but I haven't been ready to let any of my work go. I think I'd like to now though."

"I think that's wonderful if that's what you want."

"It is. I have to disassemble them and drive them down to Seattle. It's a long road trip and not nearly as fun in the truck as it is on the bikes. It's like forty hours of driving each way, but if you're open to it, I'd like you to come with me."

Shock rolls through me, and I shift back to search his gaze.

"Seriously? "

His fingertips trace my jawline as he smiles. I can feel that he's worried. Maybe he thinks I'll say no or that he's overstepped by asking.

"That seems like such a personal thing. You really want me with you?"

His laugh is warm and deep as it vibrates across my skin.

"It is really personal. That's exactly why I want you with me."

Oh. Oh.

I can't help the rush of pleasure and desire and warmth that rushes through me. The way he loves me and accepts me and wants me by his side, the way he's let me into his life and his soul will never cease to amaze me.

"I'd be honored."

Our lips meet tenderly in an unhurried kiss as we curl tighter together. His body is perfect, a striking combination of softness and strength, and being in his arms feels like home.

"The weather is supposed to be good next week, no big storms. I'd like to go before winter really hits and I have to wait for spring. Would that work for you?" he mumbles into my hair.

"I'll go anywhere with you. Anytime you ask."