Chapter 28

Bellona had been allowed to leave the room and go and sit out on the deck, but only with Set or Charon keeping a close eye on her. Bellona stared at the dark night sea without really seeing it. A large black dog had appeared not long ago and put its head in her lap. Bellona had been patting it methodically ever since. She was hollowed out inside, her rage and battle lust gone, leaving aching worry in their place.

Set came and sat on the chair beside her. Hermes just came and told me that Rafael is going to pull through. They are still healing him, so you cant see him just yet, but hes going to be okay.

The air whooshed out of Bellona, and Set put an arm around her. Thank you, Set. For everything, she said, her shoulders sagging. She refused to cry again, but her whole body shook with relief right to her bones.

Youre my best friend, Bells. Im always going to be here to hold you back from the edge, Set said, rubbing her arm. Im not much use to you here anymore, so Im going to go home to Ayla. After today, I really need to hug her until my ka feels right again.

Bellona leaned against him. I understand completely. When hes up and about again, Ill bring Rafael to Egypt so he can meet Ayla. Maybe she can give him some tips on how to live with a shithead like me, she said, making Set laugh.

You are both welcome at any time. You know that. Ayla will be ready with a list of ways Rafaels pharma company can help the work shes doing. She will put you to work, too, if you let her. Set squeezed her once more before letting her go. Im so happy that you found Rafael. I cant wait to watch him run absolute rings around you. I feel like this is going to be a whole new beginning for you.

Hermes appeared on the other side of the deck and twirled his staff. Glad to see my dog is keeping you nice and calm, Bellona. Jackal is the bestest of boys.

Im going to train him to bite you on the ass for knocking me out, Bellona replied with an evil smile. Even if it was the right thing to do.

Jackal would never follow such an order, Hermes said with a quick glare at the dog. Would you? Jackals tail thumped a few times, and he panted a happy grin at his master. Im taking that as a yes. Set? You ready to go?

I am. Ill be seeing you and the kid soon, Set said and bent to kiss Bellona on the forehead. She watched them disappear through a door of light before she went back to staring at the ocean and the stars. She tried to let the night soothe her, and she took deep, calming breaths.

Hes okay, hes okay, hes okay, she told herself until she started to believe it.

The sun was risingwhen Circe came outside carrying two bright orange cocktails. She passed one to Bellona before taking the seat beside her.

The wound is closed up, and now we have to let the magic do its work, she said and handed one of the cocktails to Bellona.

Thank you, Circe. I dont know how to repay you for this, Bellona replied. She cradled the cocktail but didnt drink it. When can I see him?

Give it an hour or so. Seeing him is fine but dont try and wake him up before hes ready. His body sustained a lot of damage and rapid healing, which plays havoc with a mortal body. The longer he sleeps, the better, Circe replied. She gestured at the cocktail. Drink. Itll help.

Whats in it? Bellona asked. It wasnt wise to insult Circe, but Bellona was also careful of anyone giving her drinks she couldnt immediately recognize.

This and that, but its got a nice little restorative potion that will help you think clearly. You expended a lot of energy tonight, and it will do you good.

Bellona drank, and the fruity mix left an aftertaste of guava and magic in her mouth. Warmth spread through her, and she took her first easy breath in over twenty-four hours.

Thats some good potion, she said, and the sorceress smirked.

Everyone is always so worried when I try and give them a drink. I dont know if I should be insulted or not, Circe replied, leaning back into her chair with a contented sigh.

Bellona had another mouthful of the cocktail. The stories about you make even the gods wary of crossing you.

Circe huffed. You, more than anyone else, should know that we are not the stories they tell about us.

Bellona bit her lip before caving into the biggest thought currently chewing her brain away. Do you think we can change our natures? The gods, I mean. Im a goddess of war. I dont know how to be anything else or if I want to be.

Circe reached out and laid a hand on Bellonas arm. Tell me whats wrong, and maybe I can help?

Bellona drank her cocktail and told Circe about the past few days, about the women in cages, and all Set and Rafael had said about her being more than just a war goddess.

Circe waited until she was finished without interrupting her. She looked up at the fading stars and let out a sigh. We are so old and come from a time when women had no rights at all, so I understand why the idea of choice has left you confused. Im going to say something, and I want you to take it on board. Are you listening?

Yes? Bellona said with a frown.

Circe turned her head to look her dead in the eyes. You can be whatever the fuck you want, Bellona. Youre a fucking goddess. Jupiter may have forced you to work for the pantheon, shoving a sword in your hand and into a role that he understood, but hes fucking dead, and you are not. You came into being by the call of women who needed someone to fight for them when no one else would, and then a fucking man used you for Romes conquest games. If you want to take up the mantle to be a champion for women again, do it. Fight for them. You dont have to pick up a sword again if you dont want to. Womens lives are still a battlefield. That hasnt changed. They still need you, and if you are still hearing their cries and screams after all this time, maybe its because you werent listening to who you are actually meant to be.

Bellona stared at the sorceress, wide-eyed. I… I never thought that was why I still heard them. Rafael is the only thing that has ever quietened them. I thought they were a curse.

Maybe they are prayers, Circe said, looking back out at the ocean. Gods were born from humans needs. What need do they really have for war? None, but they still do it. We know who suffers the worst for it—women and the innocent. Listen to the voices instead of blocking them out, and maybe you will know what you need to do.

Circe, has anyone ever told you that you are very wise? Bellona asked. She was still processing, but she knew in her gut that the sorceress had hit the heart of the matter.

Circes laugh had a magic of its own. I spent a long time alone on that island. It gave me the ability to listen when someone is talking and hopefully give good advice. She gestured with her head towards the house. Go and see your Rafael and send Charon out. I need him to take me home to bed.

Bellona got up and moved to hug Circe. Thank you. If I can ever repay you, please tell me.

Make sure you find all those people that Rita trafficked, and that will be thanks enough, Circe replied, giving her back a pat. Go to your man, and you will feel better.

Bellona hurried inside and almost crashed into Charon and Hermes. Circe wants to go home. She said I could see Rafael.

Well, dont let me stop you, Charon replied and shot her a wink.

Hermes pointed to the nearest door. Hes in there. No waking him up.

I wont. I wont.

Inside the room, Rafael was lying on a bed and had a cover of golden light shielding and healing him. Circe and Selene had cleaned him up, so there was no sign of blood, and he looked like he was only sleeping. A dark red scar was all that remained of the wound that had almost robbed her of him for good.

Bellona sat down on the chair that had been placed beside him and took his hand. She had promised herself that she wouldnt cry again, so she pretended not to notice the tears that slipped down her cheeks. She kissed his hand and rested her cheek against it. She could feel the flicker of his pulse, and that, more than anything else, reminded her that he was alive.

Hermes came in and sat on the other chair beside her. I like your new guy, Bellona.

You met him? she asked, sitting up and wiping her cheeks.

I kept him from moving on to any afterlife when the girls were working on him. We chatted, Hermes explained. He really loves you, you know?

The poor guy, she replied, making Hermes laugh.

Youre not so bad when youre not angry. Rafael will keep you steady from now on. Thats probably a good thing for everyone.

Bellona stared at her beloved, still sleeping deeply. If he ever wakes up.

It might take a day or two, but he will.

Ive been thinking of taking up Dionysus on his offer to use his beach property in Turkey. If Rafael can be moved tomorrow, will you take us there? Bellona asked.

Hermess smile widened. Dont want him to wake up here where we are going to ambush him, huh? Thats smart because we will. Youve never dated a human, and we want to know what all the fuss is about.

Im going to need a few days to have him to myself, and then Ill bring him back. I just… I only just got him and almost lost him, Bellona said and swallowed the sudden lump in her throat.

I get it. Dont worry. Hermes pulled out his phone. Hey, want to see something that will cheer you up?

As long as its not a dick pic because I cant take any more shocks today.

Hermes snorted. You should be so lucky. Here, watch. He passed Bellona the phone and pressed play on the video. She recognized Hades and Persephones lounge room in their villa in Elysium.

Bellona raised a brow. How did you get your phone to work in the Underworld?

Me, god of messages. Hermes pointed to his chest. Just watch!

The camera panned to two chubby babies standing awkwardly and hanging onto the edge of a couch. They had grown so big since Bellona had last seen them, and it had only been a month ago. Hermess arms appeared.

Melino?, come to Uncle Hermes and help him win a bet, he crooned at the fair-haired girl. She burbled, her knees doing a bounce. Thats it, walk to Uncle Hermes.

Dont do it, kid. Its a trap, Dionysus piped in. Baby Zaggy, come to Big Zaggy and show Uncle Hermes hes still a loser.

Bellona giggled, despite herself, at their antics.

Come on, Mel, my baby girl. You can do it. If you come to me, Ill give you cookies! Hermes said, clapping his hands. Melino? seemed to be considering. Yeah, thats right. Ill give you cookies.

Ill give you cookies and a kitten. Yes, you want a little kitten? Dionysus countered.

Dont listen to him. Ill give you cookies and a kitten and cocaine and anything else you want, starting with a C.

Dionysus elbowed Hermes. You start with a C.

How about both of you stop offering my children illicit bribes? Hadess voice echoed from somewhere in the background.

Okay, no kittens, but everything else is on the table, Hermes whispered.

Come on, Zagreus, you got this buddy. Oh, oh, hes doing it! Dionysus crowed as Zagreus took an uneasy step. Not to be outdone by her brother, Melino? followed, and the whole video became a chaotic mass of shouting and cheering.

Both babies wobbled on and managed to stay upright as they went towards their uncles…and kept walking past them over to Cerberus sleeping on his bed. Zagreus sat on his butt between the dogs legs, and Melino? climbed onto his back and lay down. Cerberus didnt even wake up.

I think thats a tie? Hermes said, and Hades and Dionysus laughed.

Bellona passed the phone back to Hermes. Fates help those children with uncles like you two meant to be the responsible adults.