Chapter 22

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

Grace

Damn our lives have been crazy. Like Francis the week before, folks are out at work with the flu so everyone not sick is putting in extra hours. Not to mention Damien's homework is killing me. I thought I was pretty intelligent until I saw what he was learning at nine years old for Christ's sake.

On top of that, I've been trying to help Momma Molly with Bullet as much as I can. If I'm not at the Smiths' house then Francis or Doc are. If Doc is, then Damien and I either go to his house or bring his pop back to ours, as he can't be home alone. This pace is killing me as much as what's going on at the club. Francis shares some, but just by the way he is acting and the number of excruciating headaches he is experiencing, I know he is using his skills more than he usually does.

After Bullet's emergency every guy is being extra careful. They go out in pairs now and have prospects watching women and children of the brothers. I know this has to do with Wrecker's club but no one is saying anything to me. This entire situation's bringing my guilt to the front. I hate that Francis and his brothers are suffering because of my prior bad decisions and me. As I continue to ponder everything, my phone rings. I look down and smile.

"Hey, honey how are you? Hope your day is going good."

"Darlin', you need to quit worrying. Your emotions and thoughts are all over the board again. Not good for you. I told you everything is good. The club is fine and none of what's going on has to do with you. We had trouble with Wrecker's club before I ever met you, so it is what it is. Just got to keep pushin' on."

"Francis, we talked about you getting in my head. Not fair. But you're right, I'm overwhelmed and not sure I see an end. Anyhow enough about me, is everyone recovered from the flu at the club? I know a couple of the guy's families were still down with it. We have a bunch of people at the hospital out so probably going to have to put some time in to help out, even though the clinic is not open late at night or on weekends. Last I heard, about half of the doctors in the ER were out."

"Do what you have to, Grace. I can bring Damien to the firehouse if I'm on the schedule or the club if I'm there. He likes both places. I was callin' to say why don't I stop and pick up some food for tonight. I want you to take it easy, okay? Just see what you guys want and let me know."

Before I can holler for Damien, he comes running out of his room, hands in the air, huge smile on his face.

"I want Mexican. Can we have Mexican? Tacoooooos."

"Well, I guess I know what to pick up. Darlin', you want your usual? I'll let you know when I'm on the way. Love ya, Grace."

I let Francis know what I want and we disconnect. I look down and see my son giving me the stink eye for some reason.

"Damien, what's wrong? You look upset, child. Are you feeling ill, maybe we shouldn't get Mexican?"

"No, Momma, I'm feeling good, but you need to listen to Dad as he's right. You need to look after yourself better ‘cause you're doing way too much every day.' I'm here and can pick up a couple more chores, if that would help. I don't mind really especially if it means more allowance. I don't want you to get sick or so rundown because you can't keep up with everything you are doing."

He comes right to me, hugging me tightly. As always, I wonder how did I get so blessed with such a wonderful kid. Especially with who his father is. Right after this last thought; he jerks his head up, grimacing at me again. And he looks angry or how Damien tries to look when he is.

"And quit thinking I'm a little boy, ‘cause I'm not. Growing up, Momma, got to face the facts. And I'm not sure why you're thinking about my father. One day we need to talk about him too, Momma. I'm thinking there are things you aren't telling me."

I lean down, placing a kiss on his head and then ruffle his hair. Can never get anything past him that's for sure. And since we have been living with Francis, between the two of them, their abilities seem to be getting even stronger. Got to watch my thoughts around him.

"Okay, kiddo, I'll try to remember that. But to me you will always be my baby boy. So is tacos what you want Francis to pick up for you?"

Resting in the tub, eyes closed; with nothing urgent on my brain trying to take over I let out a breath softly. Francis is right: my thoughts are all over. With all that has been going on in our lives and add the frigging flu, it has been a cluster. Now that we are engaged, my man has made it abundantly clear the sooner the better for us to tie the knot, so to speak.

Personally we could go to court but Francis wants me to have "the wedding of your dreams, darlin'." He doesn't get all I need is to marry him and have our family there to help celebrate. Being settled in our cabin in the woods has helped out a lot. Not having to decide on which house to go to made our lives so much easier. It also helped all of us settle into our new family routine.

Hearing the creak of the door opening, I slowly blink my eyes open to see Francis standing in the doorway watching me intently. Without a word, I know he knows everything going on in my thoughts. The dark side of our relationship is that I can never hide anything from him. With his skills he knows everything before I even process my own thoughts. Sometimes it's plain scary and other times infuriating. Like right now.

"Since you know what I am thinking about, come on in. Take a seat so we can discuss it. Give me your thoughts, honey."

I watch his enormous frame enter the bathroom, which is not a small room by any means. But as soon as he enters it feels tiny. He moves to the sink and leans his buns against it, crossing his ankles while never losing eye contact. I can't read anything in his expression so have no idea where his thoughts are. He crosses his arms over his massive chest and lets out a deep breath. Here it comes. He always does that right before his words of reason come out.

"Before you lose it, Grace, I don't always do that. Sometimes I might cross my arms while other times I might let out a puff of air. But that's not what we need to discuss, right, darlin'? I know the last couple of months our lives have been on a downward spiral. First Emmie's health scare, Bullet's accident and then overdose, then the flu hittin' all of our places of work. Not to mention all the time we are spending outside of work trying to help Doc out with his pops. You have a huge heart, Grace, but Damien is right. You need to delegate some of this shit. You're worn out and I can see it. Darlin', we have to be able to share shit with each other so neither of us get weighed down. You with me?"

I just nod for the time being as I can tell Francis is on one of his rants.

"Now, darlin', let's take each item on your list and break it down so we can figure out a solution that we are all happy with. Ya know what, first finish your bath. Get comfy and I'll grab Damien, as this should be a family discussion so that's what we will have. Maybe some ice cream to go along with our chat. We will be in the family room, darlin'. "

He moves and leans down, kissing me gently. Then he strolls out and leaves me be. I just close my eyes again as I try to relax. I realize he has only my best interest at heart, but sometimes I feel like a child next to him. He never seems to let loose or relax. He is always on and I think it has something to do with his s pidey senses as he calls them. As Damien gets older, he is tending to follow in Francis' footsteps. For a child, he is too serious. I don't want that for him but it's out of my control. All I can do is be there for him as I am for my man. I will enjoy this serenity for a bit longer, then I'll face the fire as both of my men get down to taking stress out of my life. Or what they think will do that. Only time will tell.

Later that evening after our family talks, with both Damien and Francis offering to take on some of the household chores to help me out, I finally drop into bed. Even after my bath and not having to cook dinner, I'm exhausted. Feeling kind of off. I'm hoping against everything that I'm not coming down with the flu. The very last thing I need. I feel the bed give as Francis gets in on his side. He immediately pulls me close and before I can utter a word he beats me to it.

"Grace, don't even think about it. If you have the flu, so what? I've been around the firehouse and clubhouse with sick folks puking, shitting, and whatever else. If I'm gonna get it, I'm already on the way. I want you close, need to feel ya, darlin'. Not for anything tonight, woman, but just to feel ya. I'm exhausted and too tired to do anything else, Grace. Just relax, try and get some rest."

"Each day I have come to realize how lucky I am to have found you, Francis. Never in my wildest dreams did I think what we have would be possible. I hate bringing him in our bed, but after Wrecker and his club I was perfectly fine with just Damien, my family, and work. I knew eventually he would grow up and find his own life, but I would always have some part in it. That would have been enough for me. Or I thought so. Until you. Now I know I can't live without you and what we have. Thank you, Francis, for being you. I love you, honey."

"As I love you, Grace. Now give me a kiss and go to sleep. We both are wiped. See ya on the flip side, darlin'."

I reach up and give him my lips. He gives me a wet, deep kiss and then turns me around, my back to his front. His arms hold me close and I listen to him until I know he is asleep. It's rare he falls asleep before me. That's how I know he spoke the truth. He is wiped. With that thought, I feel my body falling into sleep held close to Francis.

Which is exactly where I want to be.