Chapter Twelve

Kieran

The Underdogs won only because Charity had our flag when Coach called time. Micah had put down Henry. Ashton had put down Wren and River. Dasher had taken out Fox. Before I rammed into Tomás, I had taken out Micah, Dasher, and Ashton. Got him as he was talking shit to Tomás on our mic. But I hadn't gone after Charity. I had gone after Tomás instead of saving our flag. Instead of completing our mission. I had fucked up.

I had meant to hurt him. Bad.

The fucker had sparked a response I couldn't control. I was still hard when I stomped out of the field and headed home like a sore loser. I couldn't get away from him fast enough. Ignored the crowd, the cheers, the celebration. Wren made the crowd laugh and cheer for us despite our defeat. My body vibrated with rushing anger. A potent thing gaining friction the more I thought about Tomás. I reached the house breathing fast, heart pumping. My lip swollen. Tomás had played me too. Taunting me as if he knew what haunted my nightmares.

Him. He haunted my nightmares. I sated my throat with a tall glass of water. The arrogant prick had no clue what he'd awoken inside of me. But he would. Soon enough he'd know the shit he started.

The others followed shortly after I arrived. We all settled, defeated, in the living room.

"This was stupid," Henry said. "I'm never doing this again." He started to leave but I blocked his path with my body. When his eyes met mine, he knew not to poke the bear inside of me. He stepped back with the rest of them.

"I thought it was fun," Wren said.

"Fun," I parroted. I couldn't stop the animalistic rage rushing through me and I upturned a side table. The lamp shattered to the floor at Wren's feet. He sat up straight, coiled tight. Everything wrecked. "This loss revealed our weaknesses. Our vulnerabilities and you think it's fun! Do you have any idea what our enemies could use against us!"

Fox kept his eyes to the floor. "I didn't think he'd betray me," he said so low I felt the pain of the betrayal as if it were my own.

"We've all become complacent and for us that is very dangerous." I let all that sink in. Their expressions said it all. They knew. "Nothing in our lives can be taken for granted," I said, a little softer this time. "Our vices," I pointed at Wren. "Our complacency," I pointed at River. "Those we love," I looked at Fox, "and our indifference," I glared at Henry. "And my anger," I added. "We need to reel all that shit in when we're out there. Our enemies will use that against us. And make no mistake, our enemies live within this school. They can't do anything while we're here, but out there? In the real world? They can and they will."

Wren leaned forward, eyes down, hands interlaced in front of him looking defeated. "I wasn't thinking like that."

I let out a breath. "I know. And we shouldn't have to. But we're not the normals. If we forget, we die."

"Well, that's a total downer," Wren said.

No shit. "We have to fix this."

"How?" River asked.

I dragged my eyes to Fox who I couldn't read. "We make an example out of them. It has to be tonight while the shit is still fresh. We go the way of the gods."

The silence in the room felt like an ice pick against my skin. Fox had to approve of it. It meant hurting Dasher as much as Tomás.

He nodded. "Fine," he grumbled. "Do it."

River shook his head. "That's fucked up, guys. Even for us."

"In or out?"

"Yeah, I'm in."

Wren nodded in agreement. And Henry put in his positive vote.

My body felt so tired.

Henry wasn't like us. He was smaller, had a soft disposition. We'd tried to teach him how to defend himself and he'd broken down in sobs. We tried to teach him how to use a weapon, and he'd refused. But he was our tech person. Smarter than anyone in the room. I needed him. "Henry. I want you there. We need to show them a solid front."

He nodded and slipped away.

Fox followed me into the kitchen as I pulled out one of my meals while Fox made a sandwich for himself. This had been us since we met after we'd been dumped into the elementary school version of Arcadia. Fox and I had become solid the first time we met, as if he'd been the missing part of me. I felt his conflict as if it were my own and I hated Dasher for putting it there. The I-told-you-so didn't feel so grand anymore, so I didn't say it.

"I never thought he'd betray me," Fox said, sitting down and taking a bite of his sandwich while I ate without tasting my food.

"You have to show everyone he means shit to you now."

Fox swallowed hard.

"You have to let this shit between you two go. He doesn't need or want your help." I knew the words were harsh, but they were also true, and I didn't know how else to help Fox with the baggage he carried around when it came to Dasher. "And after tonight, he's going to hate you."

He tossed the sandwich in the trash and walked away. I didn't even hear his room door close.

The front door opened and closed as I put my dish away. Getting under Tomás's skin made me feel alive. I couldn't kill him yet, but I could fuck with him.

He straightened when he caught sight of me. A hint of pain crossed his features, but he quickly schooled it before he grabbed a glass of water. Without paying me any attention, he downed the water. I couldn't help but take in his profile. The soft line of his jaw, the smooth suntanned skin, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed. I had the urge to cup his throat, feel his pulse. He lowered the cup and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. Why my dick chose that moment to twitch made no sense. I wasn't attracted to him. No way. My erection in the field had to do with the adrenaline rush, not him.

He rinsed the cup and put it away. "What?" he finally said. "You want to finish what we started?"

The image of him stretched out on top of me was what came to mind. My dick against his thigh. And the fucker had grinded against me. I'd felt his erection too before he jumped off me as if his ass were on fire. Then he ran.

If I expected Fox to let go of Dasher, then I had to stop reacting to this prick like I wanted to shove him out a window. I still didn't know Tomás's true bloodline. Murdering him would cause attention and right now, that would be more dangerous than letting him live.

"I think we got off to a rocky start," I said.

He snorted. "Really? I hadn't noticed."

Cocky fucker almost made me smile. "You're a part of the four whether we like it or not. Means that we might be family." Bile rose in the back of my throat. I already knew we weren't blood related, but he had to belong to one of the four.

That made him snap his mouth shut. I could see the want of his comeback. He vibrated with it. It took several seconds of silence for him to finally speak.

"I'm not your family," he said in a tone that seemed absolute. As if he knew without a doubt that he had no blood ties to any of us. "My family is dead."

My brain buzzed with all the questions I wanted to ask him. Why was he here? Who sent him here? What was his background? Who are you?

He lifted his hand to wipe his face and winced. Dropping his hand to his side he scowled at me. "You're fucking psycho. It was just a game." He made a hasty retreat to his room, holding on to his ribs.

A game?

The asshole needed to learn the rules of this place.

I heard his door close but not the chair. I breathed in a moment, just letting myself calm down.

Not happening.

Reaching his door, I pushed it open without knocking. It almost slammed against the wall. Everything I'd meant to say drained away at the picture of Tomás bare chested in front of me. His pants were unbuttoned and hanging low on his hips. Every bit of him exposed awakened something feral inside of me. A desire so deep, I feared releasing it. I suddenly forgot how to breathe, to talk, to make sense of shit.

"What the fuck?"

The angry sound of his voice snapped me out of my stupidity, and I remembered why I entered in the first place. "You think this is a game? Where the hell do you think you are? Who the hell do you think goes to school here? Because they aren't friends, they aren't life-long partners. They're sons and daughters of assassins, drug dealers, mafia, cartel, and the apple doesn't fall far from the tree." I should've shut up. But I couldn't. For some reason, I needed him to understand. "Nothing in this place is a game. It's a test to measure your strength, and out there," I pointed at the window, "beyond the campus, they'll rip you apart. So if I were you, I'd really start thinking about alliances. Consider who has your back before someone drives a knife right through it."

His eyes widened, his mouth opened and closed, and I felt that stirring inside of me that burned all my nerve endings. Then he had to make it worse. "Why do you hate me so much?"

His voice had dropped an octave, had sounded so damn cautious, innocent. It was my turn to open and close my mouth because I had nothing I could give him, so I said nothing and walked out.

The feeling to possess, to own him, ripped through me, shattering pieces of myself that I had hidden from everyone. Thinking about it made me feel unhinged.

I rushed into my room and tore out of my clothes. I jumped in the shower. My dick already painfully swollen. I gripped it tight and gave it a few pumps, wincing at the resulting sting.

Tomás's big brown eyes comprised every space in my thoughts. I'd been watching him too. The way he kept himself apart from everyone else. Timid. He wore those large hoodies that did nothing to reveal his lean tanned body, dark nipples, narrow waist, and the dip of his hips. And all of him was smooth. I wondered if he even had pubes.

I wanted to bend him over, pull down those ridiculously low hung jeans, and drive my dick between his cheeks until we both came. I wanted to hear my name tumble out of his mouth in ecstasy. To explore every inch of his body, especially the tattoo he had on his left side pec.

Fuck!

The thought made my balls draw up. I squeezed harder until pleasure turned to pain. Unlike Fox, who admitted to us that he was bisexual after he figured it out, I was gay. The rumors about my sexual prowess with the girls narrowed to my ability to extend foreplay. I'd make sure they came more than once. And on the occasion where I had to fuck them, I used meds to get it up.

The thought made me sick.

My cock softened.

I unclenched my hand around it, wincing, and tried to hold myself up against the tiles, but my legs gave out and I dropped on my knees, dry heaving. Tears mixed with the water as I tried to suck in air.

Being gay meant nothing when you were a nobody. Fox's family weren't lethal killers. They were dirty, rich, assholes who had Fox do their dirty work. Them finding out he was bisexual would probably lead to a cover up. Not a bullet to the head. If my grandfather found out about me, I'd lose everything.

I wasn't ready.

I had plans set into motion that would ruin them.

I couldn't let my dick be my undoing.

Tomás didn't matter. He meant nothing to me. A pretty face. That's all. I could ignore my attraction to him. I could deny myself this. I had to.