6. EVERLY

EVERLY

SIX

G roaning, I open my eyes, my head throbbing. Looking around the hotel room, I note the almost too-clean smell. Not what I'd expect considering there's a dead man on the floor. Fuck, a dead man. What is the matter with me? How have I allowed it to get this far? What am I doing? I've been responsible for two deaths in as many days and why? Because I get off on a possessive killer wanting me? I shouldn't be this way. It's sick. I know it is but, I crave Ronan more than I crave my next breath. It's something I've never felt before, I can't explain it and it's terrifying because he has awakened a darkness inside me that I know will never go back to sleep. And I don't want it to, I want more, I crave more. I want to see how far we can push each other, find our limits and then break through them.

Sitting up, I wince, my body aching from last night. I can't believe everything that happened. The knife, Ronan taking me from behind, the balcony. I passed out while we had sex on the balcony and I don't remember coming or him bringing me to the bed. Yet here I am. I'm naked, but I feel clean and I smell like the hotel's lotion, which I didn't put on last night. I look around the room, a gasp escaping me when I see the body is gone. There's no blood, no body, no Ronan. Anxiety fills me as I climb out of bed, stumbling around. His bag is gone.

Turning to the mattress, I see clothes folded neatly with a small paper wrapped bouquet. Looking at the flowers, I notice the soft white petals as they turn downward in a tear or bell shape. They're so sad, yet beautiful. Bringing them to my nose, I inhale deeply, allowing the green, spring scent to consume me before putting them down and picking up the clothes. I slip into the high waisted jeans and cropped tank before sliding on the plaid over-shirt.

"Really?" I chuckle, looking at the shoes on the floor. "You know my shoe size? Do I even want to know how he figured that out?"

"A ruler,"

"FFFFUCK!" I shriek at Ronan's voice as I stumble back onto the bed. He raises a dark blond brow as a smirk plays on his face.

"You alright there, Angel?" He teases before handing me a bag. "Breakfast," he replies to my questioning stare.

"You got me breakfast?" I ask as he hands me a coffee. "Where's the?—"

"Eat up," he interrupts. "We're heading out in ten minutes."

"Where are we going?" I ask as he taps something out on his phone.

"Gotta get moving," he sighs as he slips his phone into his pants pocket. "I need to get across the border, I've already been here longer than I should've."

"Wait, am I going with you?" I ask with a piece of a donut hanging out of my mouth. Ronan looks at the pastry and a genuine smile forms on his face as he crouches in front of me and leans in, biting off the end of the donut.

"I gave you your out last night, Angel." His hand snakes behind my neck, gripping me into place. "You chose to stay here and let me fuck you into unconsciousness over a balcony. You're mine now, and forever." His lips are mere millimeters from mine and I'm sure he can hear the quickening of my heart rate and my breathing.

"And when you get tired of me?" I whisper against his mouth. "What happens then?"

"Impossible," he states as if what I'm saying is the most preposterous thing ever spoken.

"Right," I say with a chuckle. "Like I haven't heard that before." Giggling, I tap his nose before going to stand. Ronan grips my wrist and pulls me to him.

"Everly." His voice is low and full of desire as he breathes out my name as if he owns me… then again, maybe he does. "I've been watching you with a deadly hunger, obsessively studying every breath, every move. My addiction to you is not just a gentle flame, it's an inferno of desire that devours my very sanity. I've imagined countless scenarios where you're mine and mine alone, where we're the only souls left in existence. Everly, you may think you have control over your own life, but my sweet angel, you couldn't be more wrong. We are woven into each other's very beings, there is no escape from us. Even in death, we will be intertwined with each other. I need you to understand, there is no getting tired of you. You are mine, you always were meant to be mine, and you will always be mine. One way or another, you will belong to me, forever. Nothing will stand in the way of that— not even you. "

"Not even me?" I question weakly, my heart pounding in my ears as I lose myself in his gaze.

"If you try to leave me," he murmurs, his lips connecting with mine so softly it causes me to whimper. "I will kill you, and then I will kill myself and come find you again." I open my mouth in shock and he takes it as an invitation, forcing his tongue into my mouth, claiming it as his.

"Ronan," I pant as he climbs on top of me, his hot mouth planting feverish kisses over my neck and jawline. "Ronan, how am I going with you if you're crossing the border?" He freezes and pulls back.

"You're going to sit in the front seat like the good girl you are and when they ask for your passport, you'll give it to them."

"I-I don't have a passport, plus won't it look weird, a Canadian bringing back an American?" Annoyed, he pushes himself off me and adjusts his erection pushing at his jeans before walking over to his bag.

"I'm from Boston, I'm not Canadian. Not too good with accents are ya?" he teases, causing me to blush.

"I don't know. I've been in the midwest my whole life, I figured you're just what they sound like up there. That doesn't answer my question though, I don't have a passport."

"I have a guy who got me the proper documents. We are going to meet him tonight to get yours."

"I don't know," I whisper, biting on my nail. "Ronan, going to another country…if I'm caught, they'll send me to jail."

"First, do you think I would allow that to happen? And second, what do you mean you don't know? What's there to know? You are getting in my car and we are going across the border." His voice is dark and commanding in a way I haven't heard since being tied in the woods, blindfolded and pleading with him.

"What if I say no," I whisper as he shrugs his bag on his shoulder. "What if I want to stay here?" He turns and looks me over, the backs of his fingers running over my cheek.

"I told you, Everly, you belong with me, forever. I won't live without you. I gave you an out last night and you chose this."

"Yeah? And? Ronan, you wanted to die last night!"

"So what?" His voice cracks ever so slightly as his hand drops from my face. I watch his brows furrow in confusion and his eyes look almost lost. "You said those things to me so I wouldn't die?" I open my mouth to lie, to tell him that I didn't mean it that way. But… I did. I talked him down because the thought of him dying and leaving me to clean the mess… it was too much.

I'm silent for too long and he sees the truth written over my face.

"Right," he whispers, looking away. "Can't love a monster."

"Ronan! That's not fair! You took me! Nothing about this, about us is normal, I can't fall in love with you! I'm still not sure I trust you won't murder me! What we're doing, yeah it's enjoyable, but sustainable? Really? So I go to Canada and we go on a killing spree there? When does it stop? You and I will end up in prison or killing each other. How am I supposed to sleep next to you at night and not fear your addiction taking hold and you ending me?"

"I don't kill there," he hisses as if I've insulted him. "I kill once a year, until now. This is new for me too, alright! I didn't expect this and I'm not sure where it's going to lead us but what am I supposed to do? You and I can't be apart. And between the two of us, you're the only one who has contemplated murdering me in my sleep." I wince at his truthful words.

"Ronan, as much as I am enjoying this, it's becoming very clear that I need to go. You and I… I think we're addicted to this and no good can come of it." I say, getting up and walking toward the door.

"I'm sorry." He laughs darkly. "Did I give you some impression that you're allowed to leave without me?" I turn to glare back at him but the hurt and betrayal in his eyes breaks me. He's trying to mask it but I see the panic, it's the same panic I saw when he thought I was going to jump in that guy's car. Reaching up, I cup his cheek, and he flinches as though I might strike him.

"Ro—"

"No," he grits out, jerking his face away. "If you are leaving me, if you're going to go on with your life and forget about me… about us, then you let that name die."

"This is toxic," I try to get him to look at me but he refuses, his eyes burning holes in the carpet. "You know what is happening between us—it's wrong, it's a sick and twisted addiction. I know this because even as I'm saying this, my body wants to stay here and find out how much more twisted we can become. It's not safe, for either of us. We will be what ends the other."

"You're right," he whispers, his eyes finally reaching mine. He looks so lost. "But I'm okay with you being my undoing, my end. Your body wants to stay with me, but my fucking soul can't imagine being ripped from yours. This isn't just fucking, Everly, I'll chop my cock off and give it to you if that's what you ask. You are my oxygen, if you leave, I will die."

"We've known each other less than a week," I manage out, my heart aching for the panicked man in front of me. He looks so frightened and alone.

"In this life maybe." He drops to his knees in front of me. "Everly, you and I have done all of this before, I know you know that because you feel it too. You heard me begging you. You feel me. We are?—"

"If you want me to go with you," I say firmly, though my body trembles, I can't listen to him. I can't because everything he's saying is in my head already. We are connected, soulmates, or two halves of the same twisted, depraved soul. I need him like I need my next breath. But no one should feel that kind of awakening after a week—soulmates or not. Inhaling, I steel my gaze as I look into his pleading one. "If you want me to go, you will have to take me in a body bag. I'm not going alive."

"Why?" His voice breaks as a tear rolls down his face. "W-Why are you doing this? I'll protect you. I-I will give you anything you want! Money? Jewelry? A house? A car? My fucking heart on a platter? Anything, just name it and it's yours!" He's frantic as he reaches for me but I back away.

"Freedom," I whisper. "Freedom to make my own choice." His lip quivers for a moment as he looks me over.

"Angel, you will make the wrong choice."

"It's my wrong choice to make." I counter as he shakes his head while standing up.

"Why can't you see that I'm trying to protect you," He takes a step toward me and I step back, until I'm at the door.

"I know you think you are," I say softly. "But the only thing that I need protecting from right now, is you." It's as if I stabbed him with my words. His face scrunches up as he closes his eyes, his body deflating. I take the opportunity to reach into his pocket and grab his phone before opening the hotel room door. Ronan grabs me by my hair and tries to tug me back.

"You're not leaving me." He grits out through clenched teeth. "I'm not living without you."

"Let me go," I whisper calmly. "Or I will scream." The door is open and all I'd have to do is yell for help and it would all be over.

"You wouldn't," he breathes out, "You scream and they will take me away." I shake my head.

"Don't make me," I beg, stepping over the threshold as his hold on my hair releases. "I'm so sorry," I whisper as he continues to stare through me.

"You will be;" He promises before shutting the door, leaving me standing in the hall. I look down at his phone, it's locked, of course. Sighing, I make my way to the lobby. I don't know what I'm going to do, but I know I have to get as far away from Ronan as I can before I change my mind.