20. Lottie

The journey back to Boulder in the dead of night would've put me on edge if my dad being in the hospital hadn't already done that.

I'd barely calmed down by the time we'd arrived at the airport. We weren't meant to fly back until Tuesday morning, but somehow, Hunter had managed to push that forward and secure us a private jet before we'd even managed to leave the hotel.

He'd taken care of everything. He packed my suitcase, including all of the new clothes he'd bought me. I changed out of my dress, lingerie and heels into a pair of jeans, t-shirt and sneakers. He was in go-mode and I was lost and confused, overwhelmed, and out of my element. I didn't want to go home because going home meant leaving the peace I'd felt in Austin behind, but Dad was in the hospital, and I needed to be with him. Anything else would have been selfish.

Cancer. Rapid spreading, stage four. Pancreatic. It had resulted in a blood clot, which went to his lungs, causing a pulmonary embolism. Thankfully, Dad had noticed the swelling in his leg and was being triaged in the ER when it happened, so he was able to get treated quickly. But that meant an induced coma, and lots of testing, which led to the diagnosis.

I could barely think.

I felt like nothing more than a walking, talking robot as I stepped into the lobby of Foothills Hospital. A set of unfamiliar faces greeted Hunter and pulled him in for a hug before offering their sympathies to me as well, and it wasn't until Hunter finally introduced them as Wade and Ray Colchester that it clicked. Theirs was the wedding I'd snuck into on a whim back in Oahu.

"Brody was at the resort when he asked me to call an ambulance for him," Wade said, explaining his connection to the situation without me having asked. In truth, I just assumed Hunter felt awkward about the situation and wanted someone there that he knew, that he had called Wade and asked him to meet us there. "I never would have thought it was this serious."

It was four in the morning and Dana had already gone home. She had work in two hours, and despite me protesting and telling her not to go in, she insisted, said someone needed to hold down the fort. I didn't have the fight in me to convince her it was useless.

"Thank you for helping him," I said mindlessly, wandering from the conversation to request a room number and visiting privileges from the front desk.

————

A gentle hand shaking me stirred me from sleep.

"Lottie." The utterance of my name was soft, sweet, deep. "Come on, sweetheart."

Slowly, drearily, I forced my eyes to open. Through the little slits of my vision, Hunter's face came into focus, his brows knitted together as he crouched in front of the padded bench I'd called my bed for three nights now. Every part of my body ached, but the steady rhythm of beeps from Dad's EKG was enough to keep me feeling okay.

Hunter's hand brushed across my cheek, pushing my hair back away from my face and behind my ear. "When was the last time you left this room?"

The answer was obvious. I was still dressed in the tee and jeans I had arrived in, my hair greasy, my face smudged with makeup.

"Let's get you some fresh air, okay?"

I shook my head. I didn't want to leave Dad's side, even if it meant going for a walk with Hunter. I hadn't had the time or the mental energy for old walls to fall back into place, but new ones were erecting, telling me I couldn't leave the room or Dad would die on the spot. I had to stay with him. Leaving wasn't an option.

"Lots," Hunter sighed. In my haze, the dark circles under his eyes made me wonder if he'd been sleeping at all himself. "He'll be okay if you leave."

I shook my head again. He wouldn't. My mind was screaming at me that I couldn't do that to him, couldn't abandon him. "No."

His lips pursed together as he realized he wouldn't be able to sway me. "Okay," he conceded. "How about a shower, then?"

I looked at the door that separated Dad's room from the en-suite. I'd used the bathroom plenty of times so taking a shower should be fine. I could handle that.

"As long as you stay with him."

He nodded.

————

Dad slowly started to rouse at the seven-day mark.

There wasn't much, just his eyes opening and a hand closing around my own, but it was more than enough to flood me with at least a drop of relief. The longer we waited, the more he came to, and doctors got the go-ahead from him to start chemo while he was there. Time was of the essence, and we'd already lost a week and a half from the induced coma.

Hunter brought me breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Dana brought me fresh clothes and blankets. Jared had supposedly stopped by a handful of times but I'd requested he be blacklisted from visitation the moment I'd arrived, even going so far as showing the nurses a photo of him.

A part of me wondered if things would be different had I'd finished saying Jared's name at dinner with Hunter. Would he have stayed by my side through all of this? Or would he have left me to fend for myself, to handle it alone? The guilt ate away at me in between moments of worry over Dad, especially when Hunter was around. But I didn't want to lose him. I couldn't handle it, at least not yet.

As much as Hunter tried to convince me that Dad would be fine if I left, there was something churning in my gut that said otherwise, forcing me to stick around. It had become nonsensical and I knew it, but I just couldn't bring myself to leave. So, instead of me leaving, Hunter spent a handful of nights in the hospital, either curled up with me on the bench or sitting up on the floor underneath me.

But we were in Boulder. He didn't have to do that. And no matter how much I tried to convince myself it wasn't the case, I couldn't help but think that maybe he was doing it to keep up appearances.

————

Just as Hunter was getting up off the floor to get ready for work, Dad's voice cut through the silent room, stopping both of us in our tracks.

"Lottie."

I dropped Hunter's hand and looked back at my father. The tubes in his nose, the catheter, the constant beeping of machines, it had all become normal though otherworldly. He'd spoken a handful of times, just a few sentences at most. It was still a relief to hear his voice, though.

"Dad. You okay?"

"Yeah," he said, his voice hoarse. I stepped across the too-clean tile floor and pulled up the chair that sat next to his bed. "Hunter."

Hunter's gaze immediately snapped to my dad. "Hey, Brody."

"Come here. I want to talk to you both."

Hunter looked at me, almost as if wanting me to confirm it was okay. I nodded and he stepped forward hesitantly, likely concerned he'd get another chewing out from my father again.

But that wasn't what Dad wanted.

"Are you," he started, pausing to cough, "serious?"

I took Dad's hand in mine and squeezed it, not quite sure what he meant. But Hunter spoke up. "We're serious, yes. I know you're not happy about it?—"

"No," Dad wheezed, his pale hand moving up to cover his mouth. "I was being overprotective. Lottie's capable of making her own decisions and I should have trusted that she'd made a good one with you."

"What do you mean?" I breathed, squeezing my father"s hand again to get his attention back on me. "You're okay with it?"

He nodded. "I… I clearly don't have a lot of time left, Lots. If you're happy, then I'm happy."

I looked between him and Hunter, unsure of what to say. On the one hand, I was falling for Hunter, but on the other, we hadn't discussed what was going on between us nor where we thought it was heading. I didn't want to lie to my dad, not like this, but what other choice did we have?

"I do have a request, though," Dad said, blinking to keep focus.

"Anything," I told him.

"I promised myself that I'd make it to your wedding." His grip on my hand went a little limp as his eyes met mine. "You deserve one parent there. I want to walk you down the aisle. I want to make sure you have someone to take care of you before… well, you know."

The blood rushed from my face. I loved my father, loved him more than I would ever admit, but my God, he couldn't just put that out into the universe. He couldn't just saythat to my fake boyfriend.

Hunter took a step back, the surprise overwhelming him as well, and leaned back against the wall opposite Dad's bed. "Brody, I?—"

"Will you do that for me, Hunter?" Dad asked, that steely gaze he was known for finally working its way through as he stared him down. "If you're serious about my daughter, if you see a future with her, will you marry her?"

Hunter's wide eyes clashed with mine. This was not a conversation to be having at seven-thirty in the morning, not a conversation to be had at all. Even as a fucking dying wish, I didn't know what to do with it.

I'm sorry,I mouthed to him, hoping he was more prepared on how to handle this than I was.