Chapter 11

CHAPTERELEVEN

Liv

It’s Monday afternoon, and I’m at the guys’ house because Ryder asked me to come over and check on River. Apparently, he’s been locked in his room for three days straight, only leaving for quick showers and bathroom breaks, and has barely eaten or drank anything. Ryder is worried and thought maybe I could bring him some food and help him get some rest. I’m more than happy to try.

I stand in the kitchen with Ryder, who’s making some grilled cheese sandwiches.

“Please make sure that he really eats them. He hasn’t eaten in at least a day, since it’s hard to get him out of the zone. I bet you’d have more success than I have,” Ryder says to me.

“Sure. I haven’t talked to him in a few days. I miss our conversations,” I say as I take the plate and make my way to his room.

I knock on the door and push it open slightly. River is sitting at his desk, wearing big headphones, and appears to be unaware of my presence. I walk over with the plate Ryder made for him. I bet that boy can’t cook one bit, but these sandwiches look good as fuck.

I approach River slowly from the side, trying not to startle him too much, because he still seems not to have noticed me. Carefully, I place the plate on his desk and gently rest my hand on his shoulder. He blinks a few times before taking off his headphones and turning to me.

“Hey,” he says before finally breaking into a smile.

“Hey there, handsome,” I say, stroking his messy hair out of tired-looking eyes. “Ryder mentioned that you haven’t eaten in a while, so he made you some food.”

River swivels his desk chair towards me and pulls me onto his lap, inhaling a deep whiff of my hair before reaching for the sandwich. He offers it to me first, but I shake my head.

“I ate a little while ago,” I tell him.

He nods and takes a big bite, savoring the taste. As he enjoys his meal, I glance over at his three monitors and find each one is filled with what appears to be coding. I have no idea what he’s working on, but it looks incredible.

“Wow, that looks pretty impressive,” I say, and he takes the napkin from the plate to clean his hands.

“It’s for an assignment—a pretty important grade. I get tunnel vision when I work on stuff like this. Sorry if I’ve been MIA for too long,” he says, squeezing me.

“Don’t worry, I get it,” I assure him. “I can get into the zone too while dancing.”

I look over his work again and laugh quietly.

“It must be nice to be this smart,” I say, rubbing his hands that are now holding me around my belly.

“Not really,” he says, huffing into my shoulder, and I turn to look at him.

“It’s not?” I ask, and he furrows his brows.

“For me, it’s the source of all my problems and Ryder’s suffering,” he says, leaning his temple to my shoulder. “I have a high IQ. Some people with a high IQ are also highly sensitive, which is the case for me, unfortunately. I experience everything in a much more intense way than most. I’m bombarded with stimuli every day, which can be pretty overwhelming for me.”

I feel dumb for not noticing this before. Sure, I thought River was a fellow introvert, but I never realized he was suffering.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” I say, stroking his cheek. “That must be difficult to handle.”

“Yeah, my anxiety is the thing I struggle with the most,” he replies with a huff before squeezing me. “It’s much easier to handle with you by my side.” That surprises me, since my anxiety eases when he’s near too.

“Really?” I ask. “I always thought you were the one grounding me.” I laugh.

“Seems like we’re good for each other,” he replies with a smile.

“We are,” I say, smiling back. “Is there something I can do to help you with this? Or something I should avoid doing?” I ask, feeling a bit unsure if I’m being too much or too rough with him or anything.

“No, you’re perfect,” he says, kissing my cheek. “Don’t worry, I’ll tell you when something gets too much.”

“Don’t hesitate to tell me. I won’t be offended,” I say, and he smiles at me. “Why would your intelligence be a source of Ryder’s suffering?” I ask hesitantly, but still curious. River might think he’s responsible for Ryder’s hurting, but all I ever see is the love between them and how much they’re there for each other. I don’t understand it. He takes a deep breath.

“Ryder and I were in foster care since shortly after we were born, when our parents died in a car crash,” he starts, his fingers drawing patterns on my bare thigh above the hem of my yellow sundress. “We had a grandmother left from our mother’s side in Romania, but the paperwork was a pain in the ass, and somehow, she never made it to the US to claim us. While they were still trying to figure out who was responsible for us, we stayed in the system, unable to be adopted.

“That grandmother in Romania died when Ryder and I were six, and so we got cleared to be adopted. By this time, I was known as the shy but gifted twin, while Ryder was the loud, outgoing, and artsy kid.” He smiles. “Ryder sang all the time, and he made music with everything. When we were outside, he made himself whistles from a blade of grass, or he filled wine glasses with water and played whole symphonies with them.” I smile at that.

“I’m sure Ryder is gifted when it comes to music, but no one ever thought about testing that,” he says before biting his cheek, seeming lost in thought. “He had troubles in school though. He couldn’t sit still for long periods of time, and he was always daydreaming, unable to concentrate. He had to listen to the teachers telling him he should be more like me all the time,” he says, and I can sense where he’s going with this.

“It got so bad that Ryder started to rebel and intentionally behave worse. It was like someone pushed a button in him, and if his behavior wasn’t good enough, he just acted out instead,” he says with a cringe. “His acting out and grades hindered a lot of adoption inquiries, but I didn’t care because we’d already found Jaxon and had sworn to stick together. I was happy when the families rejected us, but a lot of them told us and our foster family that they would have taken me but not Ryder,” he says, and my mouth falls open in shock.

“How could they say something like that?” I ask, and he shrugs.

“It was horrible, and every time it happened, I watched Ryder’s self-worth crumble more. He put on a hard façade, but I could feel when he was upset, and it did a number on him. He still struggles with his self-worth today,” he says, and I can sense the pain in his voice.

I already had an inkling that this was a problem for Ryder, but hearing the reason behind it is still hard. My poor Ryder. He’s so talented, kind, and amazing.

“One day, when we were about eleven, a couple came and took me away. My foster mother was fucking angry about it, but the responsible authorities were convinced that it would be beneficial for me to spend my childhood with a family who could get me more resources and support for my gifted status, away from the brother who pulled me down,” he says, and I can sense the bitterness in his voice. I just stare at him, my eyes wide and unable to blink.

“What the…?” I mutter, and he nods in agreement.

“They wanted to adopt me and showed me a big room in a big house with everything I ever dreamed of, but I couldn’t do it. Chase, Jaxon, and Ryder were my family, not those strangers,” he says, and I can see the determination in his eyes. “So I refused to eat, drink, or speak. They finally had to return me to our original foster family because my health was in danger, but when I got back, I found out that Ryder had done the same. He was suffering just as much without me. They never tried again, and we never got adopted until we aged out of the system,” he finishes, and I can feel the pain in his words.

“Ryder still thinks he’s responsible for me not having the best childhood or life possible. He can’t see that all I ever needed to be happy is to spend my life with him and the guys,” River says, stroking my hair. “And now with you too,” he adds, his eyes flicking to my lips.

I lean in to kiss him, and he hums, pecking my lips two more times before leaning back into his chair.

“I’m so sorry that happened to you,” I say, my heart feeling heavy.

“Don’t be,” he replies with a smirk. “It brought us to where we are today, and I’m really enjoying life right now,” he says, squeezing my knee.

* * *

River

“I really enjoy it too,” she says with a smile, and I peck her lips again.

They’re so soft, just like the skin on her thigh that I’m stroking. I don’t avoid her scar and just stroke over it too. She looks away from my gaze to take in the room. She’s been here once before, but she was exhausted, so I don’t think her curiosity was satisfied.

“Wanna snoop around?” I ask her, and she blushes.

“Am I that obvious?” she asks, and I reassure her by squeezing her knee.

“No, I just know my girl,” I say with a smile, kissing her cheek before she gets up and walks over to the TV and gaming systems I’ve got set up. My games are lined up in a bookshelf under the TV, and she browses through them.

“You like shooters?” she asks me, and I nod.

“I do, but I also like strategy games and platformers. I just played Tomb Raider through again and enjoyed it,” I say. She pulls out Need for Speed and stands up from her crouched position, smiling at me.

“I played this a lot with Theodore. He loved cars and racing games,” she says, stroking the cover, and I can see sadness moving into her eyes. “I miss him,” she tells me, her voice weak, and I pull her into an embrace.

“Tell me about him,” I say, and she takes in a deep breath.

“He would tackle me the moment I got through the door and demand I play with him,” she says with a chuckle. “He was done playing with our father because he never let him win, and I wasn’t good enough to be a competition.”

“You weren’t good at it?” I ask, and she pushes away a tear that slipped out before laughing.

“God no. I enjoy playing video games, but I suck big time. That was what Theo liked so much—he could play for hours with me and never lose,” she says, and that makes me laugh.

“I’d love to give it a try. Do you want to play a round or two?” I ask with a smirk.

“Sure, but let’s play a different game,” she says as she crouches down to choose one.

“Are you searching for a game you’re better at?” I tease.

“Don’t worry, there isn’t one,” she replies, standing back up and handing me Mario Kart.

I insert the game into my Switch before grabbing two controllers and sitting down in my cozy beanbag chair, the TV remote within reach.

“Come here,” I tell her, and she smiles before lowering herself onto my lap.

I hand her a controller and start the game, wrapping my arms around her waist to hold the controller in front of her. She holds hers just above mine as she chooses Yoshi as her character, then she steals my controller and chooses Peach for me, making me laugh. We start the race, and it’s a blast. Liv is so bad at it, but we’re having so much fun. She tries to launch turtle shells at me and laughs her ass off when one of them gets me just before the finish line, costing me the win. I can’t stop laughing either, and I love every second of it.

“You know, these games need a girlfriend option,” she says as I pull her hair away from her neck and plant a kiss on it. I love the way she refers to herself as my girlfriend.

“They do?” I ask.

“Yeah, like an option that you can choose when you play with your girlfriend, so the game automatically becomes much harder for the guy and easier for the girl, making it fairer,” she replies, and I chuckle into her neck.

“I don’t think ‘fair’ is the right word here, beautiful.” I say teasingly. “You’re right, though. I think I’m going to build a girlfriend button into my game,” I say, and Liv turns in my lap, surprised.

“You’re making a game?” she asks.

“I didn’t tell you? I’m working on one. It’s still nowhere near finished and more of a side project, but I enjoy doing it, and maybe I can use it as my final project.”

“Wow, River, that’s so cool. What’s it about?” she asks, intrigued.

“It’s a time traveling adventure game where players must solve puzzles and complete quests while traveling through different eras of history,” I explain.

“That’s right up my alley,” she says excitedly, beaming at me. “Can I play it when it’s done?”

“I’ll need you to be a beta player so I can assess how easy the girlfriend level has to be,” I tease, and she falls backwards into my chest, laughing loudly.

“You jerk!” she exclaims, playfully punching me in the arm. Liv winces in pain and shakes out her fist. “Ouch. Not fair,” she complains, and I chuckle.

“How is it not fair when you hurt yourself while punching me?” I take her fist and bring it to my mouth, blowing on it before kissing her knuckles. Gazing into her eyes, I whisper, “Better?”

“Mhmm,” she replies, nodding.

I place my controller beside me and take hers out of her hand, setting it down next to the other before turning her in my lap so she’s straddling me. I take her hand back in mine, bunch up the sleeve of her dress and start to kiss up her right inner forearm to her elbow. When the fabric gets in the way, I repeat the motion on her left arm, kissing her scar and stopping at her elbow. Since there is no more skin to kiss, I gather her hair and bring it behind her so it falls down her back, giving me free range to kiss the skin on her neck. After placing a kiss on every inch there, I start to kiss up her face, landing on her temple.

“River,” she murmurs.

“I want to kiss every inch of your body, worshipping you,” I whisper into her ear.

“Please,” Liv replies, her voice barely audible.

“You never have to beg with me, beautiful,” I say softly.

I can see the desire in her eyes, and it makes me want her even more. I move my lips to her cheek and kiss her gently, then turn my attention to her neck again. My hands move to her waist, pulling her closer to me. I feel her body shudder under my touch as I trace the outline of her ear with my tongue, then move back to her lips.

Our kiss is slow and deep, and I can feel her fingers curl around the back of my neck, pulling me closer to her. We break the kiss, and I look into her eyes, seeing the desire there. I know I want her, but I also know that I want to take things slow. I want to worship her, to explore every inch of her, to make her feel wanted and desired in ways she never has before.

“Will you let me love you, Liv?” I ask, my voice low and husky.

She nods, her eyes never leaving mine.

“Then let me show you how much you mean to me,” I say, pulling her dress over her head.

I begin by kissing and nibbling on her neck, then move down to her chest. She’s wearing a pretty white lace bra that leaves her pink nipples visible through the material, and I feel myself getting rock hard. Liv’s breasts are the most gorgeous I’ve ever seen, and I’m dying to suck on them.

I reach behind her to unclasp her bra but pause at the closure and look back into her eyes to make sure she good with what I’m doing. She nods, and I release the bra. When she sheds it, I groan at the sight of her big, full tits. I cup them in my hands, marveling at their weight and feel, then take each nipple in my mouth one at a time, teasing them with my tongue.

Liv writhes on my lap, and I can feel the heat radiating from between her legs. I lower her back onto my knees and begin to kiss down her stomach, tracing circles around her belly button with my tongue. The position is limiting, though, so I pull her back up, hugging her tightly to my chest, and stand up with her in my arms. Liv yelps, clinging to me.

“I’ve got you,” I tell her before I gently lay her on my bed.

Liv is lying in the middle of my grey sheets, wearing nothing but white lace panties. She grabs her breasts, biting her lip, I groan and adjust myself in my sweatpants.

I pull her foot towards me and begin to kiss my way up her legs, pausing to nibble on her inner thighs before reaching my ultimate destination. I bury my face between her legs, inhaling her intoxicating scent and teasing her over the lace with my tongue.

“You have way too many clothes on, River,” Liv murmurs.

“So do you,” I reply, hooking two fingers into the waistband of her panties and pulling them down her legs before tossing them over my shoulder.

Shedding my shirt, pants, and boxers, I stand before her completely naked. My cock twitches as I take in the sight of her lying naked in my bed, so I stroke it hard a few times, trying to keep myself from coming just from looking at her.

She sits up at the edge of the bed, reaching out to me, and I step closer. When she takes my cock in her hand, I start to protest.

“I want to make you feel good, Liv,” I say, but before I can continue, she takes me in her mouth and my mind goes blank.

I moan and run my hands through her hair, feeling the wetness of her mouth and the softness of her lips. She bobs her head up and down, taking me deep into her throat and swirling her tongue around the tip.

It’s been over two years since my last blow job, but I can’t remember it being this good. I reach from her head to her breasts, needing to feel them. Liv lets my cock plop out of her mouth and looks up at me, chuckling. She guides my cock between her breasts, which are conveniently on the same level, and pushes them together, squeezing my dick between them. Holy fucking shit.

I nearly lose my mind. She guides them up and down my cock, while all I can do is stand there and concentrate on not combusting. I close my eyes and lean back, letting out a deep moan. This feels so incredible. Liv’s breasts are soft and warm around me, and the sensation is driving me crazy. I reach down and place my hands on her shoulders, feeling her smooth skin under my fingertips. She continues to slide her breasts up and down, increasing the pressure and speed. I can feel the heat building inside me, and I know I’m close to the edge.

“Fuck, beautiful,” I say on a groan. “I’m going to come if you don’t stop.” She slows down and looks up at me, a wicked grin on her face.

“Not yet, you’re not,” she says, pulling back and standing up.

She pushes me back onto the bed and climbs on top of me, straddling my hips. I can see the desire in her eyes as she leans down and kisses me passionately, her tongue exploring my mouth. I grab her hips and pull her closer to me, feeling the heat of her core against my cock. I want to be inside her so badly, but I need her to come on my tongue much more, so I break the kiss and cup her cheek.

“Sit on my face,” I tell her.

Her eyes widen, but she doesn’t move, so I slap her ass.

“Are you sure?” she asks, her bravado from before gone. I grab her hips and lift her over me so her pussy is hovering directly above me.

“I said sit,” I reply, trying to pull her down to me gently.

“But I don’t want to suffocate you,” she says, and I chuckle.

“If I die, I’ll go happily. Now give me that pretty pussy,” I say, pulling her down again, and she complies.

I push my tongue into her, exploring every inch of her. She’s so wet, and the taste of her drives me wild. I flick my tongue over her clit, and she moans, grabbing onto the headboard for support.

I continue to alternate between licking and sucking on her, grabbing her ass cheeks, wanting to bring her to the brink before letting her ride my cock. She’s close now, her hips grinding against my face as I work her. I slip a finger inside her, curling it just right, and her moans turn into screams as she comes hard, her wetness coating my face.

I keep licking and sucking on her, prolonging her pleasure as long as I can. When she finally comes down from the high, I gently lift her from my face and sit her down on my hips, my cock sandwiched between us and getting coated in her. She pulls me into a deep kiss, tasting herself on my lips. I can feel my cock straining against her, desperate to be inside her. She breaks the kiss and looks at me, a mischievous glint in her eye.

“You want me, don’t you?” she asks, grinding her hips against me.

“God, yes,” I say, my voice rough with need. “I want you so fucking bad.”

She smiles and reaches down, taking my cock in her hand and guiding it to her pussy. She slowly lowers herself onto me, and I can feel her tight, wet heat enveloping me. We both moan as she sinks down onto me, taking me deep inside her. I wrap my arms around her and pull her close, feeling her breasts pressed against my chest. We start to move together, our bodies in perfect sync.

This is the moment I’ve been craving for so long—the feeling of being inside her, of being one with her. It’s the first time I’ve had sex in two years, and I know I’m not going to last long, but I don’t care. All that matters is this moment, this feeling. I close my eyes and bring our foreheads together, focusing on the sensation of her body moving against mine. I kiss her, whispering how good she feels, how perfect she is.

The heat inside me builds rapidly, but my orgasm takes me by surprise when her pussy spasms around me.

“Fuck,” I say on a gasp as I come hard, my body shaking.

Despite me coming already, Liv sits up and continues to move against me, her own orgasm building. I rub her clit to help her get there, and soon, she throws her head back and moans my name, her body shuddering as she comes.

We collapse onto the bed, spent and sweaty, before I pull her close, feeling the beat of her heart against my chest. This is what love feels like.

We lie there, tangled up in each other, and I feel so close to her. It’s not just about the physical pleasure, although that was incredible. I stroke her hair and kiss her forehead, basking in the afterglow.

“I love you,” I whisper, and she looks up at me with a soft smile.

“I love you too, River,” she says, and I feel my heart swell with happiness.

I know that this moment is just one of many we will share together, and I can’t wait to see what the future holds for us. For now, though, I’m content to just lie here with the woman I love, savoring the warmth of our bodies and the beat of our hearts.

As I kiss Liv’s forehead once more, the door suddenly opens and Ryder peeks inside.

“Wow, your conversations really are the best,” he says with a chuckle, tossing a warm, wet washcloth to me, which lands on my belly. “Take care of our girl,” he tells me, and Liv laughs before flipping him off as he closes the door.

Although I could punch him right now, he has a point, so I lean over Liv.

“May I?” I ask.

She nods in response, and I begin to clean her up. When I’m done, we get under the covers and she cuddles into me. It doesn’t take long for me to drift off into a deep sleep—the first good rest I’ve had in what feels like days.