Chapter 10

Chase

S he looks beautiful – glowing even - and she sure looks like she feels better. Maybe she's just happy to hang out with me. Liam must have put in a good word for me, so I owe him big if that's the case. Lorelei, too.

I'm so excited that I almost forgot to put deodorant on, as meticulous as I was with other aspects of my grooming. I spent nearly an hour in front of my mirror, fixing my hair into a style that looked like I hadn't spent any time on it at all and trying on eight shirts before finally settling on one in royal blue that brings out the color of my eyes.

Did she spend as much time on herself as I did?

I glance at her dress, a pink V-neck that dips low. Her boobs look magnificent in it. Full. Fuck I'd motorboat the hell out of them if I ever get so lucky as to put my face anywhere near them again.

Her cheeks are a rosy pink, and part of me wonders if she's flushed. "Are you hot? I can ask the waiter to adjust the temperature?"

She shakes her head and looks at something over my shoulder. For a woman who asked me out, she seems distant – like she doesn't want to look at me.

"So, Lorelei and Liam are getting pretty serious, huh?" I ask in a desperate attempt to talk to her. "Think they'll have babies soon?"

Her eyes flick to mine with a panicked look. What'd I say to cause that distress? I hold my hands up. "Just kidding. Fuck, could you imagine that shit?" I fake shiver. "A little Liam running around, judging people for God knows what? He'd have a little tape measure and obnoxiously click it to make sure people comply with the law. Who needs that?"

She blinks and smiles. I don't know her that well, but I know it's not a real smile. It doesn't reach her eyes or make her squint like I've seen her do when her students make her laugh.

I nervously tap the table and look around our booth like the sugar packets are going to inspire a conversation. I inhale through my nose and blow it out as I wrack my brain on something to talk about. I need to take charge of the situation .

I clear my throat and drop my voice to something I hope calms her. "Thanks for texting me and giving me a chance to get to know you, Kailee. I'm really happy to be out with you."

Her shoulders slump a bit like she's relaxing, and my heart slows its rampant pounding. Maybe I have a chance if I can just assure her that I'm here to get to know her. I should apologize for being a dick earlier at work. Would she even listen?

"Chase," she says. I lean toward her, showing her I am ready to listen to any anecdote or joke she throws at me. If I show women a smidge of attention, they're all over my dick. At least, that's how it's worked on dates in the past.

"Yes?" I ask after a few seconds pass without her saying anything. "Is there something you want to say?"

She blinks and quickly looks back at her menu. Too quickly. "What are you getting? Everything looks delicious. Mmm. I'm starving."

Odd. I could have sworn she was going to tell me something profound.

"Is there something you want to ask me?"

I know we went through basics like favorite colors the night we met, and she knows who my friends are and what I do for a living. But I expected her to have the normal first date questions about my favorite TV shows or my first car. Maybe my family or which high school sports I played.

She shakes her head and frowns. "Nope. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zero. Zilch. "

I look back at my own menu. "You mentioned something about peanut butter and jelly? Is that your favorite food?"

"No, I…" her voice trails off. She leans forward and looks at me pointedly, her eyes unblinking and round. "I had a craving . You know, cravings ?"

"Ha! I get that. I occasionally have a craving for chicken nuggets. For some reason, I also have to eat Chinese food on a stakeout. It's a thing with Liam and me. We have this hookup, Mr. Lau, and he delivers Chinese to us whenever we're working. Liam and I saved his son from getting further into a gang with some heavy drug usage. He's promised us Chinese food for life when we're working. We tried to turn him down, but no joke, he kept showing up at the station randomly with full bags of food until we told him we'd really call him when we're hungry." I shrug as she watches me with a neutral expression. "We called him a couple of times, and now I associate Chinese food with late-night stakeouts."

She tilts her head to the side, and I almost gasp with happiness because it's the first time since the night we met that she seems generally interested in what I'm saying.

My heart pounds hard again as I search my mind for something else to say. Something to entertain her. If necessary, I'd tap dance on the table to keep her attention.

The waitress comes to the table to take our order. The place we're eating is an upscale sandwich shop. I thought Kailee was kidding about the peanut butter and jelly, but she quickly orders it from the kid's menu with a glass of water, a glass of Sprite, and saltines on the side.

Gosh, you really get to know someone when you're on a dinner date. But hey, at least she's not hiding who she is and what she likes.

I quickly order a pot roast sandwich with extra horseradish and a bowl of chicken, rice, and vegetable soup. After the waitress leaves, I lean my elbows on the table and focus on Kailee. I want to get to know her. That's why we're here. I'm not getting any action tonight. I'm banning myself from it. This night is about listening to Kailee and finding out what she wants in a boyfriend. If I can piece that together, maybe I'll have a shot at applying for the job.

She fiddles with her silverware as soon as we're alone, and I force the grin onto my face. I probably look like a serial killer. Clearing my throat, I finally lean across the table and grab her hand, stilling her fork before she can tap it on the table again. "Why are you nervous tonight?" I ask.

She reddens and looks down before dropping the cutlery to the table with a clatter. "This isn't a normal first date, Chase."

I squint and stroke my thumb over the top of her hand. Her whole body shivers at my light touch, and the vibration moves through my forearm, waking up my dick in the process. "What do you mean? You went out with Leo. I can't assume that was your first date. "

She blows out a sigh so hard that the hair framing her face moves. "I've been on a million first dates, Chase…" She trails off, and she looks at the wall behind me. She opens her mouth, then closes it again. "I just feel like there's a lot at stake."

"Because our friends are together, and we're stuck in each other's orbit if they get married?"

"Yes."

"Because we already had incredibly hot sex and it feels like we're doing this out of order?"

"Also true."

"Did I miss one?"

The waitress comes with our food just as Kailee starts to reply. She looks disappointed as the waitress places her food in front of her and then hands me a steaming tray of hot meat. I inhale dramatically as the waitress sets the soup in front of me and walks away. "Want a bite of mine?"

Kailee doesn't look at my plate, but she shakes her head so dramatically that I'd hear her jowls slap if she was an old lady.

"What were we talking about?" I ask, stirring my soup.

"Nothing exciting," she says like she's trying to change the subject. "Do you really think it's going that well with Lorelei and Liam?"

I take a bite of my sandwich and allow my shoulders to droop in a swoon before answering. "I think they'll be married by next Tuesday. You?"

"Definitely not getting married next Tuesday. "

I laugh. Hey, at least she made a joke. Maybe she'll open up now. "Do you think Liam is the one for your girl?"

She shrugs and takes a tentative bite of her food. She swallows, and it looks forced. Does her throat hurt?

I tilt my head in concern, and she notices the frown. She quickly takes another bite and smiles at me as she chews. "Umm. Good," she mutters around the mouthful.

I focus on my own food as she takes a few more quiet bites. "I'd go next Monday," she eventually says, answering my Liam and Lorelei question.

"Yeah. They're in love, and it's pretty obvious he's been in love with her since they met."

She lifts one of her eyebrows. "Do you think that's possible? Love at first meeting, I mean?"

I'm the one who looks down at my food away from her eyes this time. "Maybe. I've never felt it before, but I know Liam got hit in the face with a board by your best friend." I pause, my spoon frozen halfway to my mouth. "Have you felt it?"

"The lightning strike?" she asks.

"The board to the face."

She smiles. "I'm not sure," she whispers.

"Yeah, actually, I'd like to change my answer. When I said it's never happened before, I can't say that's true."

"Why?" she asks.

"I met you, and it was like magic, Kailee. "

She sets her sandwich down. "You can't be in love with me. We don't know each other."

I hold up my hands. "I didn't say love. I just…" I search for the words as she leans over her plate, so far that her tits may end up with peanut butter on them. Damn. Now my dick's paying attention again. "I just think that we would have had a shot, you know? A real chance," I say. "You're the first person in a long time that I met and want to get to know better. That doesn't happen often for me."

A loose strand of hair falls around her neck, and my fingers itch to push it behind her ear. "Kailee, If you wouldn't have run that morning, and if we'd have had breakfast, we would have showered together and gone to the farmer's market or something. I think we would've had a chance, and that is what I want this to be." I flick my hand, gesturing to the table. "If you want to run out of the restaurant screaming and run right to Leo or Jeff, or whatever dickbag wants you, I understand. But you're the first person I've met in a long time who I want to try with. I want to know what you were thinking when you ran. Did you expect me to kick you out?"

"Yes," she says, her eyes watering a bit. "When I have a one-night stand, the men either ask me to leave right after…you know, or they push me out the door with a canned protein shake and a smile the next morning. You would have been the first for a farmer's market visit. "

I lean forward until we're eye to eye and I'm concerned about my own shirt getting soup on it. "Then it was a first for us both because I usually don't give one shit about the women in my bed, but I damn well give a shit about you, and I have no idea why."

Kailee leans back and looks at her food again. I start eating my own, and I wait for her to say something – wait for her to take the lead here.

But she never does. We finish our food in silence.

When the check comes, I pounce on it before she can grab it, leave enough cash for the food and a tip, and then help her into her light jacket. She shivers again as I slide my hands down her shoulders, and I walk her out in the misting rain, sliding my hand into hers before we reach the car.

We ride in silence to her place, neither of us knowing what to say. But it feels right. It's almost like being on a long car ride with an old friend – a friend you know so well that you can happily exist in silence next to them. It's how I feel with Liam on stakeouts. It's how I feel when my parents come to town. After telling them all the goings on of my life, we can be next to each other without bombarding the group with questions.

My hand is on the gear shift, and she caresses the top of my hand, tracing my veins with her index finger. It relaxes me so much that my eyes flutter, and I almost miss the green light. As we merge onto the interstate, she leans over, sighs, and rests her head on my shoulder. I wrap my free arm around her and play with the ends of her hair, marveling that they're like silk in my fingers.

I will stop at the bridge ahead and jump out right here and now if Leo Paulson got to touch this hair. This is her hair, but I want this to be only mine for touching. Like a little secret we both have.

I kiss the top of her head and slowly merge back onto a two-lane road at the next exit. My entire body tingles as she puts her hand on my leg as I pull into her apartment complex's visitor parking.

She lifts her head, blinking like she's not sure how we got home so fast. "Thanks for picking me up."

"A gentleman always picks a woman up," I say, unbuckling my seatbelt. "And a gentleman always makes sure a lady gets inside safely. Let me walk you in."

She nods and gets out of the car before I can get around the car to open the door. I get to her in time to offer her my hand like my mother taught me to do when helping a woman from a seated position. "Thanks for a nice night," I say, walking her to the door.

She turns to face me, stopping suddenly. "Was it nice? I feel like it was short. You picked me up, we did small talk, we ate sandwiches, and now we're back. Is that enough to even be considered a first date?"

Here it is. Is she going to ask me in ?

I nod. "It's enough for now. We'll do more next time. I meant what I said, Kailee. I would have spent more time with you from the get-go. I want to get to know you. I'll make the second date something really cool."

She places her hands on my chest, and my skin burns with her touch, even through my shirt. I bite my bottom lip to keep from picking her up, throwing her over my shoulder, and taking her to bed.

"I shouldn't have run away. I assumed you were like all the rest."

"I am like all the rest," I say. She jolts and shakes her head like she's waking up from a dream. I lean forward, brushing my lips over her jaw and dropping my chin to match my voice. "But not with you."

She pushes her forehead to my chest, and I let her stand there. I like the feel of her in my arms. She's like my childhood stuffed panda I carried until I was six. Safe. For some reason, she's comforting. If anyone attacked us right this second, I'd protect her at all costs, but right now, she's keeping me safe from feeling like I'm not loveable. I always thought I was broken in that way because I never had what Liam and Lorelei seem to have.

I want it so very badly, and I want it with this woman.

"Will you come in?" she asks softly. "I can't run away since it's my place. "

I chuckle and put my finger under her chin, tilting her face up to mine. "Not tonight. Let's do this right this time. Let's leave our first date and not get physical tonight."

She whimpers, and her eyes flutter as I drag my finger up her cheek. With my other hand, I gently fist her hair, leaning her back even further. Her eyes shut, and her lips open slightly with the expectation of my lips on hers.

I don't disappoint. I don't crush her lips like we kissed when we had sex, but she knows I'm not fucking around. I'm firm, telling her that her lips are mine from now on if she'll have me. Her arms wind around my neck as I bend my frame to meet her mouth without her standing on her tiptoes. My free hand not in her hair cups her cheek, and I taste her – the sweet taste of the jelly she licked off her sandwich bread mixed with the taste I recognize as distinctly hers.

I remember her taste. The feel of her hand in my hair. Her soft whimpers as my tongue explores her mouth. I remember the warmth of her hair against my fingers, and my cock begs me to reconsider her offer.

She wobbles a bit, and I move my hand from her hair to her waist, ready to catch her as I internally congratulate myself on making this woman, the one I choose, weak in the knees from a kiss.

I pull my lips away, and she keeps her eyes closed, searching for my mouth again with her own. I miss the connection, but I won't be swayed tonight. Someday in the future, I'll make love to her five different ways.

We'll sleep alone tonight.

I press my forehead to hers and reach into the top of her purse until I find her door keys. She lets me pull them out and open her door for her. Only when she's safely inside, still pink in the cheeks from kissing me, do I drop one last kiss on her forehead. "Goodnight, Kailee. I'll see you at work."