Chapter 26

Ifind myself in a state of panic all day long.

Miles agreed to meet me in the hotel lobby.

The day I’ve been anxiously waiting for is here. Everything hinges on this moment, and once done, it can never be undone.

I changed my outfit three times and barely ate any food but rather survived on caffeine. Australian coffee has a nice taste unlike the stuff back home. It’s much stronger which probably explains my jittery hands and inability to slow down my heart rate.

Butterflies swarm in my stomach, my head buzzing with possibilities.

What if he doesn’t like me?

What if he tells me to stay out of his life?

I’m not sure if I have the strength to face rejection from someone who is supposedly my family.

Inside the lobby, I nervously check my surroundings. I’ve seen pictures of him on social media, so I know what he looks like.

A tall man, exactly like the photographs, walks toward me with a welcoming smile. Unknowingly, the breath I’d been holding releases at a steady pace.

Trust your gut.

Everything will be okay.

Upon seeing him for the first time, I examined all his features, stunned by our resemblances—the shape of his eyes, the bridge of his nose, even the arch of his brows.

“You must be Gabriella.” His smile captures his sentiments, and just like me, I watch him examine my features with a nostalgic expression. “You’re beautiful. Just like your mother.”

“And you must be Miles…” I pause, unsure of what to call him. “Or should I be calling your Mr. Kelly?”

“Miles is just fine.”

Standing here in the lobby proves awkward, so Miles suggests a quaint restaurant a block away.

We commence our walk past the other establishments and a load of Japanese tourists exiting a large coach. Miles tells me about his exchange-student program in high school which led to a year in Japan. To this day, he’s still fluent in Japanese.

“Japan, wow. So how did swimming come into play?”

We take a seat inside the restaurant by the large bay window. It’s not as busy or rowdy as the hotels we walked past, yet a perfect place to eat and talk without shouting through loud noises.

“I was a strong swimmer growing up, and my height proved an advantage. I tried out for the state championship, won first place, and a retired Olympic coach recruited and introduced me to all the right people. The rest is… well, a long story.” He laughs, grabbing the menu and quickly scanning it before placing it down again.

My father was an athlete.

I can’t help but be proud.

“I… I just want you to know that meeting you means a lot to me.” I stumble on my words, riddled by my emotions. In front of me sits my biological father, a man whose blood runs through my veins. He’s nothing like Edward Carmichael—they couldn’t be more worlds apart.

A waitress arrives at our table. Miles orders the chicken parmigiana while I choose the barramundi and salad. We both settle for a glass of chardonnay which is served moments later.

“I’ll admit I knew of your existence. But I was young at the time, and your father was… he made sure I was not to see Melinda ever again.”

“He’s n-not my father,” I stammer.

“Gabriella… I’m sorry. I should have fought to be in your life, but I had commitments back home. A family who needed me.”

“You were married?”

“At the time, no. My parents had a business here, and my grandparents were elderly. We had a lot of health complications in the family, then my career kind of whisked me away again.”

I have so many questions I want to ask him, my curiosity overwhelming me. The last thing I want to do is push him away, though.

Calm down. There will be a time and place for everything.

“Did you ever marry? I mean… after my mother?”

The corner of his eyes crinkled—his hazel eyes are the same shade as mine.

“I did, about five years later. Her name was Marjorie. We had twin boys. They’re eighteen now.”

“I have brothers?” I ask, shocked at the revelation. “Twins… wow.”

He nods, removing his phone from his pocket. After swiping through, he turns his phone around and shows me a photograph. They’re identical—tall, dark blond hair with athletic builds. They are handsome, indeed.

“I’m… I don’t know what to say.”

“I’m glad we’ve met, Gabriella.”

“Does your wife Marjorie know about me?”

“She’s no longer my wife. We divorced a few years ago, but she is a close friend, and yes, she does know. I’d love for you to meet her one day. I know she’d love to meet you.”

My heart almost bursts at the seams. Hope beads on my skin like dew on spring grass.

He wants to see me again.

Introduce me to his family.

This journey has been a long time coming, but at this moment, I have no regrets.

I’m quick to remember he’s just mentioned the dreaded D-word.

“Divorced? I’m sorry…”

“Don’t be…” he lingers on his words before continuing, “To burn with desire and live a life with someone else is the greatest punishment we can place upon ourselves.”

How true his words ring for me. I sense the pain that still lingers. I will never understand—he loved a woman who easily allowed a man to treat me like an outcast. I’ve witnessed only one side of Melinda Carmichael, and it’s far from beautiful.

But the heart wants what it wants.

“My mother is… she’s not the nicest of people.”

“I’m sorry to hear you feel that way. My memories of her are fond, but it was never meant to be.”

“Have you ever tried to contact her?”

Miles shakes his head. “Edward made it very clear I was never to contact her, and if he found out, my life might as well be over. Like I said, I was young and arrogant. If it didn’t happen, it didn’t happen. I wasn’t going to compete with a man who could crush everything I’d worked so hard for.”

“Do you still love her?” I ask, but it’s faint.

Miles glances toward the glass of chardonnay, skimming his fingers along the rim of the glass.

“Some things you can’t change no matter how hard you try.”

The waitress serves our food which warrants a change of topic.

We spoke for hours. He asked me questions about my life, my work, and friends back home. I learned so much about him and my brothers, still shocked I have an Australian father.

We laughed, having a similar sense of humor which made it easy to converse. Spending time with him is effortless. I could have listened for several more hours if it weren’t for the restaurant staff sweeping the floors around us, warning it was almost closing time.

“This isn’t goodbye, Gabriella,” he tells me outside on the pavement. “I’m glad you have found me. I really hope we can be a part of each other’s lives.”

I throw my arms around his waist, pulling him in for a tight hug. His arms feel like shields of love—his protection and warmth filling the void that has consumed me my entire life.

I don’t want to let go, the tears shimmering in my eyes at the thought of never seeing him again.

Miles buries my head in his chest, stroking my hair as he plants a kiss on the top of my forehead.

“Hey,” he whispers. “It’ll be all right. We’re family now. You’re not alone.”

The heavy sobs gurgle up in my throat, the typhoon of emotions bearing down in this one embrace. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Anything, Gabriella.”

I pull myself away, creating a distance as I look into his eyes. “Can I call you Dad?”

His beaming smile is enough to wash away any doubts I had about meeting him.

“It would be my honor.”

We say our goodbyes, agreeing to meet for breakfast the morning before I leave for the States.

Back at the hotel, I knock on Lana and Sebastian’s door. Sebastian is still out with some friends while Ace is sleeping peacefully in the middle of their king-size bed.

“So, it went well?” Lana yawned, sitting at the edge of the bed with her legs crossed beneath her.

“He was everything I could have asked the universe for in a father,” I whisper contently.

Lana leans her head on my shoulder. “I told you it would work out. How can anyone not love you?”

I linger beside her until my eyes weigh heavy with exhaustion. “I’m going to go to bed. Tomorrow night for dinner?”

“Yes, it’s fancy. Some restaurant which revolves around a tower. Sebastian booked our table, so we’ll meet in the lobby at six.”

“It’s a date.”

For the first time in a long time, I wake up in a delightful mood. It’s almost as if a piece of me has returned, and boy, have I missed her.

The tension of meeting Miles has disappeared. I’m optimistic things will be great between us and look forward to meeting my new family.

The bed in the hotel feels like a giant cloud, so soft and inviting, making my sleep completely dreamless, giving me the much-needed rest my body craved.

After a healthy breakfast, I shower and change into a navy dress I bought in Venice Beach. It’s kind of quirky, nothing like the stiff wardrobe my mother used to make me wear. The dress has a lapel neck with the hem sitting mid-thigh. Around my waist sits a thin camel-colored woven belt. But that isn’t the best part—it has cats all over it—small white cats. I love it so much I bought the same dress with pineapples.

The weather forecasts for some mild rain, so I decide to wear my white sandshoes and tie my hair back into a ponytail. The Australian humidity is next level and is not a friend to my curls.

Sebastian and Lana are visiting Sebastian’s family out in the suburbs, so I decide to take in more sightseeing. Now I know my father is Australian, I want to learn and see more of this beautiful country.

With my map in hand, I make my way to the concierge.

“Hi, I was just wondering the best way to get to Taronga Zoo.”

“Sure.” Byron, as his name tag says, draws on my map. He’s rather good-looking—very Chris Hemsworth with his sandy blond hair and deep voice. “The quickest way would be to walk down to Circular Quay, then catch a ferry over, unless, of course, you fancy a bus ride.”

“A ferry will be nice.”

Byron suggests some attractions at the zoo which are a must-see. I take it all in, noting his warning to start at the top of the zoo and make my way down because the hill is a killer walk.

“So, meeting someone there?”

“No.” I smile politely. “Just me.”

“How long are you here for?”

“We leave on Monday.”

“We?”

“My friends and I. I just want to get in as much as possible while they attend to other commitments.”

Byron’s a wealth of knowledge. We talked for a while about places to see in Sydney. He told me some anecdotes, all of which I welcome with a laugh. Somewhere during his story about handling a snake when he was a kid, Sebastian is standing beside me in the lobby.

“Hey, Gabbo.” He pulls up beside me, bumping my shoulder on purpose.

Where this new nickname has come from is beyond me.

“Listen, I want to talk to you…”

The second he says it, Oliver walks through the main door. My breathing becomes hitched as our eyes meet carelessly.

Why does he have to be so unbelievably sexy?

I hate that he still has a firm hold over me like a spell unable to be reversed, no matter how hard I try. He’s dressed casually, yet even in his chino shorts and plain white tee, the man manages to make me weak in the knees. Oliver has always been fit, but his body looks even more defined than I remember it being.

I notice the black Mercedes parked by the concierge and bow my head, keen to avoid an argument with Oliver in public.

“I was just heading out.” I clear my throat. “Byron was giving me the directions to Taronga Zoo, so off to hug it out with some koalas.”

“Byron…” Sebastian says, confused until it registers. “Oh, this bloke.”

“Listen, I should go.”

Accidentally, my glance shifts toward Oliver again. Beneath his baseball cap, his eyes drill into me, but his words are nonexistent.

If he wants to play the game of being an asshole, I won’t entertain his childish behavior. I’ve gotten sleep, finally easing the tension of meeting my father, and with a small amount of confidence finding its way back to me, I’m nothing like I was the night I crashed his apartment. Sad and pathetic would be a great way to describe my behavior.

I’d tried to apologize, and true to his arrogant persona, he made me feel ten inches tall with his disregard for my presence.

With the map nestled in my purse, I say goodbye to Sebastian, thank Byron for his help, then walk past Oliver with my shoulders straight, ignoring his stiffened posture as we pass each other.

The second the automatic doors close behind me, I let out the deep breath I’d been holding in and scurry toward the ferry before it leaves.

The ferry ride over to the zoo is nothing short of breathtaking. We passed the Sydney Harbour Bridge on the left, sailed past the Opera House on the right, then battled the choppy sea straight to the zoo.

Taronga Zoo is nothing like the other zoos I have visited. There are so many habitats to explore and interactive experiences. I cuddle my first koala—a once-in-a-lifetime moment as the cuddly little bear latches onto me as if its life depends on it.

I visit the giraffes and even watch the chimpanzees play with each other in their captivity. And the thing which surprises me the most, I venture into the snake cave. Snakes petrify me. It’s almost pitch black in the cave, and my heart is racing a million miles a minute, but I’m determined to see every snake and read about their habitats which are described on small Perspex display boards.

As I stare at the python watching it hiss, the space beside me becomes increasingly warm. Careful not to move, I calculate the likeliness of a snake escaping. I have no idea what to do in case of a snake attack. On the plane ride over here, Sebastian told me Australia’s the deadliest country in the world with snakes, spiders, and several creepy-crawly things which could kill you in zero-point-five seconds.

“Why are you here?”

My mouth falls open, my hand flying toward my chest in shock. The voice startled me more than the thought of any snake. I can barely see him amongst the dark shadows, but even in this humidity, I can smell his cologne. It’s just as I remember it— a manly scent mixed with rainforest and a fresh summer’s breeze.

“Why are you here?” I ask, catching my breath.

“Will you answer me?”

“Oh, so now you want to talk?” I note with dark amusement, crossing my arms beneath my breasts. “How very convenient of you.”

“What do you expect, Gabriella? You ambush me at my apartment expecting me to welcome you with open arms. The last time I saw you, you pretty much said ‘fuck you, I’d rather marry some imbecile and live on Daddy’s money.’ ”

“That’s not fair,” I yell, causing a reaction from the snake. It makes my heart stop. “You don’t think I know I made a mistake? Of course, I do, okay? I have to wake up every day regretting that moment, that decision. And you know what else I regret, trying to apologize. You’re an asshole. There, I’ve said it. Now, if you excuse me, I want to enjoy the rest of my day and get out of this cave.”

I walk out into the sunlight, my heart still beating erratically. I don’t know what scares me the most—Oliver and his ambush or the damn snakes.

“Gabriella, stop! Will you stop?” he demands as I walk toward the next enclosure.

“Why? So you can fire more hate toward me. It’s clear you’ve moved on. I’m sorry I shouldn’t have come here. I just thought…”

“You thought what?”

“I just don’t want there to be hard feelings between us,” I admit, crossing my arms again to shield myself from the spray of hurt he’s about to unleash all over me.

Oliver stills his movements, his eyes size me up from head to toe.

Can he be more obvious?

I’m not wearing anything questionable, yet his gaze is full of jealousy like I have done something wrong.

“Are you here with someone?”

“No,” I’m quick to respond. “And if I were, what does it matter?”

“What about last night? Who was he?”

“Last night? I don’t know what you’re talking about. I wasn’t with a guy.”

Oliver lets out a loud, obnoxious laugh, glancing aside at his own private joke. “Wow! Now you’re going to fucking lie to me?”

“What the hell is wrong with you? I wasn’t with a guy last night. And even if I was, it’s none of your damn business. You have Krystal.”

“Krystal is nobody. She is not a part of my life.”

“Oh, sorry… just a quick booty call for the night, then?”

“No…” he stumbles, uncomfortably. “It was unfortunate you saw her.”

“Yes… unfortunate.”

The nerve of him to question my whereabouts. I need to put him in his place. Just as I’m about to do so, he opens his filthy mouth once again.

“So, you’re fucking older men now?”

I’m taken aback by his rude comment. Then it clicks. Miles.

Did he see me with Miles?

Why on earth would he have seen me?

Maybe Sebastian or Lana told him. Or as far-fetched as it may seem, but wouldn’t surprise me one bit, he might have followed me. What a goddamn stalker.

“You saw me with Miles? He’s my father…”

His jaw almost drops to the ground at the same time his body stiffens, obviously from shock at my revelation.

“Your father? I don’t understand…” he trails off.

“When I left home, my father… well, as I knew him, told me in so many words I was never meant to be in their precious family. My mother confirmed she had an affair, and it explained why Edward hated me so much. Miles is my father. He’s Australian. Last night, I met him for the first time. So, now you know…”

Oliver removes his baseball cap, running his long fingers through his hair. I know him well enough to understand he’s trying to process what I’ve just said. It’s now out in the open, and our passive-aggressive, back-and-forth emotional game of tennis should finally end.

“I… I had no idea,” he mutters, dropping his eyes to the ground.

The ache of longing to be with Oliver echoes through the marrow of my bones. My mind wanders to our last night together, reliving the way he felt inside me, the way he touched my skin and buried himself deep within. I never knew missing someone could take over every fiber of your being, and the reality is icy cold when standing only inches away from the man you want so badly.

My fingers desperately want to reach out and caress his face, but the torment of our time apart holds me back.

“I should go…” His face softens, and he pauses, an odd smile playing on his lips. “I promised Sebastian and Lana I would take them somewhere.”

“Right…”

“So, are you joining them for dinner tonight?”

I nod, suddenly falling into silence.

“I guess I’ll see you tonight.”

“Yeah,” I say, keeping my expression to no more than a faint, slight smile. “I guess I’ll see you tonight, Oliver.”