Chapter 31

31

SELENE

E verything hurts.

That was my first thought. The second held nothing but shadows for a long stretch of time.

Heat caressed my shivering body, but it did little to sooth the pain lancing through my legs, my lungs, my head. Groaning, I pried open my eyes. They felt swollen and hard. Above me, dark clouds blotted out a night sky, oozing with hints of red. Every so often, glowing embers drifted upward.

For a long while, I stared up at them. I didn’t understand where I was or how I’d gotten here. The last thing I remembered was taking Ares’s offered hand and falling into the sea. It had been brutally cold. I remembered that, too.

But…nothing after that. Nothing but darkness.

Lifting a shaking hand, I patted my face, just to make sure I wasn’t having some kind of underwater hallucination. My cheeks were cold and damp, but I definitely wasn’t in the water anymore.

“You’re awake. Good,” Ares said in a gruff voice. “I’ll let you rest for a little while longer, but then we need to get moving.”

Clenching my teeth to deal with the pain, I rolled onto my side toward the heat. Ares sat on a stone beside a small fire, forearms braced on his thighs. His damp shirt clung to his chest, and tendrils of silver curled around his ears. The bottom half of his trousers were torn, like the legs had been ripped off. But other than that, he didn’t look much worse for wear.

In fact, he looked frustratingly handsome like this.

I pushed up onto my hands and inched closer to the fire. The heat of it was soothing after the chill of the sea. Shivering, I warmed my hands against the flames and closed my eyes. The moments eked by as we sat there, sharing a strange companionship. Hector soon landed on my shoulder and nestled into my cheek. I was glad to see him, too.

Too soon, Ares cleared his throat and stood. “I know you’re weary. I am, too. But we lost a lot of time. Judging by the sky, I’d say we have a few hours to make it back to the palace in time.”

I hadn’t wanted to think about it, still reeling from the creature’s attack and the subsequent plunge into the sea. But Ares was right. We were well past full dark. If we didn’t start walking, we’d never reach the palace before sunrise.

And so I climbed to my feet and brushed the sand from my gown. The wet clung to the velvet fabric, and the lacy bodice was torn in more than one place, exposing my stomach. But I found I hardly cared what Ares saw of me right now. I was just glad not to be at the bottom of the sea.

Ares led us to the path through the mossy hills, and we started the climb. The exercise chased the last remnants of the cold away. Soon my warm breath fogged the air, and a dash of sweat formed on my brow. Up ahead, Ares was charting the way.

When the path widened, he fell back to walk beside me. His expression was unreadable, but the tension in his shoulders told me he had something on his mind. I had something on my mind, too. Ares had saved me. Again. And he was treating me with a kindness I hadn’t thought he was capable of. I didn’t understand why. Yes, I’d helped his friend, but that didn’t explain the departure from the cruel Olympian king he normally was.

Eventually, he broke the silence. “You haven’t said much about what happened out there.”

“I haven’t wanted to think much about it,” I replied. Even now, just thinking about it brought the terror back. I’d never been more scared in my life.

“Do you want to know what happened?” he asked.

“I’m assuming I lost consciousness at some point, and you rescued me. Again.” I gave him a rueful smile.

He grinned back, and a strange tightening in my chest followed. “Something like that.”

“What was that thing?”

The smile slipped. “The beast is named Scylla. She’s lived in those waters, protecting Thrinacia, for a very long time. Odysseus thinks she’s been there since before the birth of the Titans.”

“That would make her ancient.”

“Perhaps the oldest living creature in this world.”

“And she’s never attacked you until now?” I asked.

“Normally she shows herself only briefly, then sinks down into the deep again.”

I frowned, tugging my damp clothing tighter around me. We’d crested the hills now, and the chill was beginning to return. “Do you think it was me?”

He cast me a sideways glance. “The reason Scylla attacked? No. I think all the recent storms have agitated her to the surface.”

I came to a sudden stop on the path. Words collected on my tongue, ones I was desperate to spill. And so I let them out. “Why did you save me again, Ares?”

“You did me a favor with Hestia. I was merely repaying it.” He spoke with a purposeful lilt, as if he’d planned this response, knowing that I’d ask.

And the answer did nothing to satisfy me. We continued forward, but I stared at him for a long while, making it clear I would accept nothing but the full truth from him. Eventually, he shook his head.

“Why not just accept this from me, Selene?” he asked.

“Because there’s something you’re not telling me.”

He blew out a breath. “You made me agree that I’d accept you as a member of the Thirteen Crowns and—”

“No,” I said, narrowing my eyes. “You were saving me before I did that.”

“I can’t let any permanent harm come to you. All right?” He threw up his hands, clearly frustrated with me. “Is that what you wanted to hear? Are you happy now?”

I fell silent, listening to the crunch of leaves underfoot. Trees soon surrounded us, signalling our progress across the island. Ares continued to stalk onward, his jaw clenched. It took me a moment to process what he’d told me. And even after I mulled it over, I couldn’t say it had answered my question.

“Explain what you meant by that,” I said, jogging to keep up with him.

“You’re picking at a thread you don’t want to unravel.”

“Is it an order Zeus gave you?” It didn’t make much sense, but it was the only explanation I could conjure with what limited information I had.

Ares laughed bitterly. “No, it most certainly is not. Now just drop it.”

Frustration burned through me. I grabbed his arm and jerked him to a stop. Looming over me, with his burning crimson eyes and his muscular form outlined by the pale light slashing through the trees, he looked positivity menacing.

My breath caught. I lifted my eyes higher. Gone was the dark. A new day had dawned.

A kaleidoscope of thoughts and emotions roiled through me all at once. We’d missed the sacrifice. I’d failed my people. And Ares no longer had the armor to protect his skin from the sun. It was lost to the sea now.

A torturous expression crossed his face as he observed the light in unison with me. He cast a desperate glance around, clearly searching for shelter. But there was nothing nearby, save for the trees. And despite the branches twisting overhead, they wouldn’t fully block out the sun.

“You go on ahead,” he said urgently. “I’ll find somewhere to wait out the daylight.”

“I can’t return to the palace without you. You’re Zeus’s friend, and he’ll listen to you, but not to me. He’ll sentence me to another trial for missing the sacrifice. And this time, I’m not sure Erebus would deem me innocent.”

“Zeus couldn’t hold another trial until evenfall. I’ll be back by then,” he argued. “But you need to go now. Maybe it’s not too late. You could explain I’m on my way and… I don’t know. I’m trying to see a way we can save this, Selene.”

It sounded impossible, but it wasn’t as if there were any other options.

“Where will you take shelter?” I asked.

“I’ll find somewhere. That building where you found Hera must be nearby.”

Suddenly, the light dimmed, and thunder crashed through the sky. It came upon us far faster than could be natural. Only seconds later, clouds rumbled overhead and loosed a torrential downpour on the world. Heavy rain slashed through the trees, pounding against me. I was drenched within an instant and—

A burning blaze of pain tore across my skin. I screamed, twisting sideways, as if to shake off the fire, but…there was nothing there. Only rain.

It seeped through my clothes. The burning intensified.

Shuddering against the pain, I stumbled down the path, shielding my face from the acrid rain pouring down on me. Because that was the only thing it could be—the rain . I choked, scorching fire tearing through every inch of my skin. I could barely see straight. My vision darkened in the corners, and I fell to my knees.

Mud encased me.

“Come on.” A strong hand wrapped around my arm and tugged me to my feet. “We need to run to that building.”

His voice was strong and sure, but laced with pain. Letting him guide me along the path, I glanced up at him. Horrible, wicked welts reddened his face. His legs were covered in them, too. But still he plowed onward, my arm held tightly in his grip.

After what felt like an age, the ruined structure emerged from the depths of the forest. We stumbled past the broken columns and headless statues, practically diving into the safety of the stone. I fell to my knees as soon as the sky vanished overhead. Gasping for breath, I doubled over on myself, too blinded by the pain to do anything else.

The moments that followed were interminable. Even as the scorching pain dulled around the edges, it lingered. Every time I tried to move, another bout of it consumed me until I collapsed onto the floor again. Hissing through clenched teeth, I tried again. More unseen flames devoured my skin.

After several attempts, I gave up and remained there, staring at the gruesome masks lining the wall.

As a vampire, I had never known pain. Not like this.

A rustling sounded from somewhere nearby. “Your clothes are soaked through with that rain. If you want the pain to stop, you’ll need to take them off until they’ve dried.”

“Did you just tell me to undress?”

“Don’t get excited. I just don’t want to hear you making that weird hissing noise anymore.”

“I’m not hissing.”

“You were most definitely hissing.”

A beat passed. “Have you taken yours off?”

“Yes, Selene. I decided modesty was less important than being able to move without agony.”

My heart pounded in my chest.

I didn’t know what the big deal was. I’d been naked in front of many people throughout the course of my life. My handmaidens helped me dress and bathe. The seamstresses preferred to take my measurements with nothing in the way. And I always had three guards stationed near me at all times. They never outright stared, but they’d seen my bare skin.

This felt different, though.

“If it helps, I swear I’ll keep my gaze averted,” he said.

Before I could talk myself out of it, I shucked off my clothes. Every moment of it was excruciating, but by the time I’d peeled all of it off my skin, I had to admit I felt better. The pain had dulled, at least. While I’d been scrabbling around, Ares had found a rug and some timber from somewhere in the building, and he’d built another fire. His clothes were spread out on the floor beside it, drying.

I tried not to look directly at him. But even out of the corner of my eye, I could see the shape of his body. All hard planes and sculpted muscle. Cheeks heating, I covered my front and spread my clothes out beside his. Once I was done, I started to move to the opposite side of the fire, then thought better of it. He’d clearly be able to see me through the flames. So I perched beside him instead, settling on the soft rug.

“Well,” I said, trying to grasp for anything to say to distract me from the fact we were sitting here completely naked together. “This has been quite the disaster.”

Ares chuckled, a low, rumbling sound that sent a rush of heat through me. It was a nice sound, I had to admit, especially after the events of the past day. It was a shame he was so angry all the time normally. This side of him was much more palatable. And I knew as soon as we stepped foot inside that palace, it would vanish again.

“Erebus has chosen a spectacularly painful punishment,” he said after a moment. “The others will be livid.”

I nodded. It would trap vampires inside during storms. That would not only make life much more difficult, but it would make them seem weaker in the eyes of mortals. For the stability of their reign, that was a bad thing. But despite the pain I’d just endured, I found I felt some twisted pleasure from imagining all the ways Zeus would find this unbearable.

“Do you think it’s permanent?” I asked, keeping my eyes locked on the dancing flames.

“Unfortunately, yes. Erebus has to follow through on his threats. Otherwise, we’ll stop doing what he wants.”

I risked a quick glance at him, but lingered a second too long when I couldn’t help but notice how the light of the flames curled across his jaw. Swallowing, I looked away again. “Don’t you ever wish you were free of him?”

“Of Erebus?” He sounded genuinely surprised I would ask.

“I think that answers my question, then.”

“No, it’s just…” He sighed. “None of the others would dare ask something like that. They’re too…well, I wouldn’t say afraid. They just wouldn’t dare question the way of Erebus. It’s different for you, I know. He didn’t create you.”

“He plucked you from mortal obscurity and gifted you with eternal life. I understand.”

“Do you?”

I turned toward him and caught him looking back at me. He kept his eyes on my face, though, never lowering his gaze to take in the naked curves of my body. For that, I softened toward him a little. He was honoring his promise to me.

“I really do understand why you’d feel indebted to him. I suppose what I don’t understand is why none of you have ever changed your mind about it. You have to do whatever he demands of you, no matter how cruel it is. And if you don’t…” I gestured down the corridor. Outside, rain still crashed down.

We’d gotten inside quickly enough that our welts were beginning to heal. But if we’d stayed out there much longer…I had a sinking feeling Erebus’s new form of punishment would have killed us.

“And Gaia is much better?” he asked with a frown.

“I wasn’t lying when we first met, Ares. I don’t worship Gaia.”

“Who do you worship, then?”

I gave him a slight smile. “Duty. Protecting my people. I’m normally better at it than this.”

“Hmm.” His jaw tensed. “Protecting your people from Zeus, I presume?”

I tensed, but I saw no reason to lie to him now. He’d only see through it at this point. “I’m sure you’ve heard rumors about Troy. We don’t treat mortals quite the same way you Olympians do.”

“You’re talking about Zeus and his farms.” He draped an arm over his knee, his gaze hard as he stared into the fire. “Well, he won’t step foot in Troy. You can be certain of that.”

I furrowed my brow. “Why?”

Sighing, he ran his fingers through his hair, then winced as his still-damp strands caressed him with those vicious raindrops. “Zeus is still my ally. I won’t say more than that.”

I shook my head, my frustration beginning to mount again. Every time it seemed like we were a step closer to understanding each other, Ares took a step back, reminding me of who he was and what he truly wanted. And that was an alliance with Zeus and an unreasonable loyalty to a god that required innocents to die.

“And why is that? Zeus is…well, you know what he is. He’s needlessly cruel. And while you seem that way sometimes, too, there’s this humanity hiding beneath all that. The way you treat Hestia. The friend of yours on Thrinacia. How you speak about other mortals, like you see them as people, too. Don’t think I haven’t noticed.”

I’ve noticed everything , I realized.

He looked at me then, and there was a pain hidden behind his eyes. “I heard what Hestia told you, that we were siblings before Erebus turned us into Olympians. Well, there’s more to the story than that.” He ran his hand through his hair again, ignoring the rain. It was a nervous tick, I realized. “We lived in Pergamon back then, like we do now. But the kingdom was different two hundred years ago. The people were harsh, brutal. Someone didn’t much like us, so they burned down our house. For a year, we had no money, no roof over our heads. Beggars in the street, that’s what we were.”

I stared at him, listening. Obviously, I didn’t know any of this. The mortal lives of Olympians were never discussed. I’d assumed most of them liked to pretend they’d never been human. In their minds, they wanted to imagine they’d been fully formed as vampires, like the Titans.

Ares continued, his eyes growing distant. “Hestia got into some trouble. She’s never told me who started the fight or why, but someone stabbed her. She was bleeding out in an alley, surrounded by mud and piss. Zeus found us, and he offered us immortality. A way to save Hestia’s life. If it weren’t for him, she’d have died that day.”

As if my hand had a mind of its own, it reached out and gently touched Ares’s back. Despite the chill in the air, his skin warmed my fingers. The muscles in his back stiffened against me, but he didn’t pull away. Instead, he met my gaze. There was something mesmerizing in his eyes. And I became all too aware of how easily he could reach out and touch my bare skin.

“You feel like you owe him,” I said softly.

“I do owe him, Selene. I owe him my life. And I owe him Hestia’ s life.” A pause. “It’s not that I don’t see what he is. Trust me, I do. I just can’t bring myself to turn my back on him.”

“Perhaps that’s your true god, then,” I said, almost wistfully. “Loyalty. It’s an admirable god. Almost as good as duty.”

“A god called Loyalty. I wouldn’t mind that.”

“From everything I’ve seen in you, you’d serve him well.”

His lips quirked up in the corners, and his eyes raked across my face, dipping a little lower—but not past my neck. “You look fucking beautiful like this, you know. I know I shouldn’t say it, but it’s true.”

A wave of heat rushed through me. And for a long moment, all I could do was stare at him, certain I’d heard him wrong. But then he reached out and gently pushed a tangled lock of hair behind my ear. I shuddered against his touch, barely noticing the sting of the wet strands against my skin.

“Surely you don’t mean that,” I whispered. “We…you…”

“Are enemies? Yes. And I can’t see how that will ever change. That’s the cruel twist of it, Selene. In another life, I think things could have been different for you and me.”