Chapter 7

CHAPTER SEVEN

Lila

"But I want ice cream now." The little whine in Jake's voice makes me smile, but those pleading brown eyes make me almost cave. If I weren't so exhausted, I would.

"Let's go on Saturday when we can enjoy it." I dig around my purse for the apartment key. "Work wasn't so fun today."

"But Jared says they get ice cream after supper every day." He leans in closer, eyes widening. "Every day."

"It'd be cheaper to buy a gallon from the store."

"That's not custard."

"It's ice cream. It's all good." I slide the key into the lock and turn the handle. I lean down and kiss his forehead. It's not his fault his best friend has more advantages than him. "I promise we'll go get custard on Saturday."

"Fine, but I want a large waffle cone this time." He stomps into the apartment ahead of me.

"Yeah?"

"Great, you're home!" Miranda clasps her hands together, drawing our attention. She's perched on the couch, her long legs crossed and a wide grin on her perfectly made-up face. She turns that enthusiasm onto Jake. "Hey, Jakey."

The back of my neck tingles. Something is up. Miranda is never excited when I return from work. Jake barely gets a nod most days, let alone a personalized greeting. His face scrunches in confusion as he turns to face me. I give him a silent look. "I don't know, buddy."

"What's going on?" I set my bag down and stepped toward the kitchen. Jake shrugged and took off to the bedroom.

"I need to borrow Jake."

"W-w-what?" I sputter, whipping my gaze to hers.

She raises her hands in defense. "Hear me out before going into boring Lila mode."

"Boring Lila mode?" I say this as a question, but I can hardly argue. My life basically comprises dropping Jake off at either school or daycare, going to work, and coming home. Regardless of my mundane life, she isn't borrowing my son.

"Oh, you know what I mean." She waves her hand at me as if I'm the one being annoying. "I need Jake."

"Need him for what?"

She tosses her dark hair to the side. "Okay, so I noticed how good Drake was with Jake. It surprised me because I didn't think he'd be into the whole kid thing."

The whole kid thing.

I don't ask why she would think that. She hardly knows Drake, not like I do. However, the topic of having kids never came up. Christ, we were just in high school, and he was as wild as they came, but he was good around the children we encountered.

A smile tugs at my lips. There was this one time we were at the store when a little boy, around three years old, got separated from his mom. Drake calmed him down and had him laughing when the frantic mother came rushing down the aisle.

Drake was always good with kids. The thought of him having them with someone other than me hurt. But why? I shouldn't care. He didn't care about me. Not really. He didn't even show up at my father's funeral. That's what I need to remember the most.

I pull on the refrigerator door too hard, and the bottles in the side door rattle, threatening to spill over.

She continues, "So that got me thinking. I want him to see how good I am with children."

I peer over my shoulder at her, dismayed. "But you're not good with kids. You don't even want them."

"That's not true."

"You more or less said that when I moved in. I believe the direct quote was, ‘As long as the varmint clings to you and stays out of my way, we'll be good.'"

She huffs. "That doesn't mean I never want kids." The side of her lip tips upward, revealing the ulterior motive I know too well. "I just need to be convincing enough to make this last."

"You're not using my son as part of your scheme." God, playing any part in getting them together sickens me, but the thought of Jake being alone with her and my ex-boyfriend? That's unfathomable.

"We don't have time to argue. Drake will be here in about thirty minutes to take Jake to the park."

My stomach twists into knots at the thought of seeing Drake again. I grab stuff to make sandwiches, no longer hungry. "Jake is not going anywhere without me."

"Oh, come on, Lila." She places her hands on her hips. "This is important."

"No, it isn't."

Miranda flits to the bookcase and grabs a baseball from the shelf. She tosses it lightly in her hand, a playful glint in her eye.

"See? It's fate," she says, catching the ball before putting it back on the shelf. "It was meant to be."

I have no idea what she means. Just because she owns a baseball doesn't mean it was fate.

"I don't think so. Jake isn't a prop. He's a real kid with feelings."

"Of course he is," Miranda counters, her gaze softening just enough to show she isn't the monster incapable of feelings. "But he likes Drake, doesn't he? And Drake likes him. It's good for Jake to have male role models."

Her words are a gentle prod, nudging at my protective instincts. We may not know each other well, but she knows enough to hit where it hurts. I've worried about Jake's lack of a father figure, but I can't do anything about it. I don't know who his father is. His birth certificate lists him as unknown. And I'm certainly not in the right space to find a partner.

I bite my lip, which Miranda takes as reluctance.

"Hey, Jake?" She yells before I have time to answer.

Jake comes running from the bedroom.

"How would you like to spend time at the park with Drake?"

I seethe.

"Yes! I liked Gun Man."

"It's Drake," Miranda says in her superior voice.

"I don't like Drake. It rhymes with my name."

"Then call him Gunner. That's his last name."

"I don't like it either. It's just stupid. I like Gun Man."

"But that's stupid?—"

"He's not going." I slap the top layer of bread with more force than I meant to and motion for Jake to grab it.

Jake's face falls. "Please, Mama Lila. I want to go."

I grind my teeth. How dare she ask him after I had said no. "You're not going anywhere without me."

"You can go too, Mom." He swivels around to face Miranda. Her back stiffens. She clearly doesn't want me tagging along.

"I don't think so, Jake." I hand him the sandwich and make mine.

"But we want you too. Right, Miranda?" He settles in the kitchen chair and bites into the bread. "And Gun Man liked you."

"It's Gunner," Miranda says under her breath. Her jaw stiffens as she turns to me. "It would be fun. If the only way you'd allow Jake to go is to tag along, then by all means, come join us." She lowers her voice and adds, "Be the third wheel."

"I don't think so." The thought of watching Drake and her interact is enough to make me vomit. Though, I better get used to it. I don't think he's going anywhere soon.

"Please, Mommy."

I take in those soulful brown eyes and melt. A trip to the park wouldn't be insufferable, I suppose. "Fine, I'll go."

"Seriously?" She rushes over to hug me, her expensive perfume nearly choking me. I stiffen in her embrace, already regretting my decision. As she pulls away, chattering about what she's going to wear and how excited she is, I can't shake the feeling that this will be a disaster.

Closing my eyes briefly, I steel myself for what's coming. The thought of seeing Drake again, of watching him interact with Jake, fills me with a mix of longing and dread. But no one knows our history, and it's best to keep it that way. We've both matured since high school. We don't harbor those same feelings or regrets.

I reach for my necklace. This is going to go over well—not.