30. Chapter Thirty Park

Chapter Thirty: Park

G od, I almost fucked everything up with Spin. Did I really never mention to him that Pear is my ex? I'm so glad he gave me a second chance. My stomach twists thinking about it on the ride back to Bangkok. Not just losing Spin as a work partner, but losing what we have. Because I know we have something.

I was so caught off guard when Pear kissed me on the beach. I thought I made myself clear—that I'm not interested in getting back with her—and that we moved past the awkward moment. We were laughing about some joke I made, and then all of a sudden she kissed me, determined to make me feel something I didn't feel. Spin must not have stood there long because in seconds I pushed her away and told her that my heart was taken. When I left her, she was crying. And I felt bad about that. But not as bad as I felt when I couldn't find Spin. Or when he came back to our hotel room and told me he'd been in Daeng's hotel room .

Fucking Daeng. But I guess I need to give the guy some credit. He obviously didn't try anything with Spin, and he kept Spin's mind off what he'd seen between me and Pear.

After Spin kissed me, we fell on the bed together.

"I'm so glad you heard me out," I mutter between kisses.

Spin mumbles something I don't catch before sweeping his tongue into my mouth.

Half our clothes are off when Spin's phone rings. Spin puts the call on speaker phone, and, after Spin tells him I'm listening, Bass lets us know that he told Kiet that Daw's cheating on him. Kiet didn't take it well.

"But he believed you?" Spin asks.

"Yeah. I got the impression he's had his suspicions."

"Sorry you had to do that," Spin says. "But I'm glad you did."

When he hangs up, I lean in and kiss him, only to be interrupted again by a number Spin didn't recognize.

"Hello?" Spin pulls the phone from his ear and I can hear a woman's voice cursing at him, calling him a lying bastard. I reach over Spin and disconnect the call. He doesn't have to listen to that shit.

Spin sighs. "Do you mind if we just go to sleep?" he asks, looking tired.

"Of course not," I say. "Will you sleep in bed with me?"

Spin nods, and we lie down together, arms wrapped around each other and Spin's head tucked under my chin.

***

We're up at dawn and get ready for the long ride home. The entire crew looks worn out, having partied until the wee hours the night before. Most of them sleep on the way home. After giving me a dirty look when he got on the bus, Daeng ignores me. I wonder if Spin told him what he saw. Spin leans his head against my shoulder, something he does a lot to people he's close to, but somehow this feels different this time. His hand creeps onto my thigh, and I smile as I encircle his fingers in my palm.

It's dark by the time we reach Bangkok and SPPT's building is lit up against the skyline. Spin and I climb into my car, and I drive him to his apartment instead of to my house because he insists.

"I'm walking you up," I tell him. He opens his mouth, undoubtedly to say that isn't necessary, then seems to change his mind.

"Okay." Grabbing his bag, he heads for the front door of his building with me just a step behind.

Spin hasn't been to his apartment since his father showed up. I want to be one hundred percent sure the man's vacated the premises before I leave Spin alone there. In truth, I really don't want to leave him there alone tonight. I plan to talk him into letting me stay.

Neither of us is prepared to open the door and find the place a ransacked mess. Books and broken dishes are all over the floor. The cushions from the couch and chairs are slashed open, their stuffing spread all over the room.

While Spin walks around in a daze, I take his phone, open his group chat with his friends, and send them an SOS, briefly explaining what happened. When the first of them—Cushion—arrives, Spin is in tears.

"Why couldn't he just take the money and leave?" he says on a sob. "Why did he have to do this?"

"You know the answer to that, Baby. Your father's an asshole." Cushion puts her arms around him while I answer another knock at the door. Bass and Nok stand on the other side and both hurry past me to join Cushion in comforting Spin.

I met Spin's sister once before when we took Nok some food after we ate at a restaurant she liked, and we stayed and visited with her for a while. She's a sweet girl who seems to have a good head on her shoulders, and she and Spin are obviously close.

"Are you okay?" Bass asks Spin, then belatedly looks around. "Holy shit. He really did a number on the place!"

"I'm so sorry, P," Nok says, squeezing her brother's arm.

At the sight of his sister, Spin makes an effort to pull himself together. "How did you find out?" he asks her, wiping at his tears. "P'Park said he told the group chat."

"I, uh, was hanging out with Bass. No way was I not coming with him."

"Oh," Spin says, eyeing his friend. But he drops the subject. Standing, he surveys the room.

"Don't worry," Cushion says, getting to her feet. "We're going to take care of this mess. Where are the trash bags?" She follows Spin into the kitchen.

"Do you think he's still in town? Spin's father?" Bass asks me.

"I doubt it. He's being paid well to leave. This is just his final word."

"How's Spin?"

I turn at the new voice, surprised to find Kiet standing just inside the door. "I let myself in. Door was unlocked," he explains.

"How did you know to come? I thought you blocked Spin," Bass says.

"I unblocked him this morning. I ended things with Daw."

"I know. She called Spin and chewed him out," I start picking up books from the floor. "Spin's pretty upset. He'll be happy to see you."

Spin cries out from the kitchen, and we rush into the kitchen where we find him standing by the shelves with something in his hands, Cushion beside him, looking upset .

"Oh, Baby," Kiet says sorrowfully as he crosses the room to him. "The conch your mother gave you." He wraps his arms around Spin, who hides his face for a moment in Kiet's shirt before pulling back.

"He broke it," Spin says, placing the pieces on the counter. "It's the only thing I've got to remind me of her, and the bastard broke it." Turning, he runs out of the room.

Nok turns and sobs into Bass's chest.

I find Spin in his bedroom, crying into his pillow. His room's been tossed around, but not as bad as the rest of the apartment. Sitting beside him, I stroke his hair.

"I'm sorry, Spin. You don't deserve this."

"I hate him, P'Park. I hate him so much. He never loved me or Nok. I don't even think he loved my mother. She was miserable and died because of him. He beat her down until she didn't want to live anymore. Why couldn't he just leave us alone?"

"Shh, I don't know. He's just a bad man. But you're good, Spin. Too good to have him as a father. I wish I could make it all better for you."

Turning, Spin looks up at me with red, swollen eyes.

"I'm so tired of fighting just to keep my head above water," he admits, chin trembling.

Drawing him into my arms, I hold him tightly while he cries. "Everything's going to be okay," I say over and over. "I promise you, Spin. Everything's going to be okay."

I will keep that promise and make him happy, no matter what I have to do.

When Spin's cried himself out, he falls asleep. I tuck him into bed before righting the chair that's knocked over in the corner of the room and setting a few other things to rights. Then I join the others still cleaning up the mess in the kitchen and living room .

"That asshole knew what that conch meant to Baby. He had to have. Why else would he have thrown it against the wall like that?" Bass says as he angrily sweeps the floor.

"I think he saw it before Spin hid it," Nok says. "He knew what he was doing."

I think of my father and how great he was and realize how lucky I was to have him for the time I did.

It's after two in the morning when we're finished cleaning and I walk Spin's friends to the door.

"You better be good to Spin," Bass warns me.

"I will. I care a lot about him," I say sincerely.

Kiet returns from checking on Spin.

"He's still asleep. Are you staying the rest of the night?" he asks me. "I can, if you want to go home."

"I'll stay," I say. I didn't tell Auntie we wrapped up early, so she doesn't expect me back until tomorrow night.

Exhausted, I lock the door after them and settle into the mattress next to Spin.

In the following weeks, our filming schedule is grueling. P'Big has a deadline he's determined to meet. We all do our best, the makeup department covering the dark circles under our eyes from lack of sleep. Pear avoids me now, but that's all right with me. I don't want to give Spin any reason to doubt me. Daeng and Gift continue to have a sizzling screen presence while bickering off camera.

On the nights we get to go home, I worry about Spin being alone in his apartment even though he repeatedly assures me he's doing fine. After having cried it out the night he found his apartment torn apart, he quickly rallied. I'm sure it helps that Kiet spends a lot of time with him. I try not to be jealous, but I can't help it. I want to spend all my spare time with Spin, but I have to be with my sister, and Spin refuses to come back to live with us.

"We can't just move in together," he tells me. "We're too new."

He's probably right, but I don't like it. I can't wait for filming to wrap up. We'll have a lot of promotion work to do after that, but the hours won't be so awful.

When the full trailer for Heartbeat is released, the message boards light up with comments from excited fans. Spin and I get a lot of attention as a couple. Daeng and Gift have fans split down the middle. Diehard PrinceGift fans can't get over them and don't like seeing Gift working with someone else. Others are agreeable to the change and even develop a theory that Gift has whipped playboy Daeng into shape. I have to admit Daeng seems to be behaving himself, but that could be due to exhaustion from our relentless schedule over the past few months.

Finally, our last scene is filmed and the cast takes a group picture with the crew and staff. This is the first time I've ever been so worn out after a series that I can't muster up the energy to celebrate. I go back to Spin's place with him, and we both pass out for two days.

Other than a few hasty make-out sessions, Spin and I haven't had the time nor the energy to be intimate since that night at the hotel. Being inside of him is never far from my mind, but I doubt my body would cooperate even if an opportunity presented itself. And the end of filming doesn't bring an end to the work. As soon as we revive from filming the series, we begin a string of game show appearances, product endorsement appearances, and, when the show premieres, fan meetings as far away as Korea. It isn't difficult to be affectionate in front of fans, since we're together in real life. Of course, we don't tell anyone that, but speculation is high. Every time I see someone comment "It's just fanservice, how dumb can you be?" I have to laugh at the irony.

"You and Spin have to film a reaction video to episode one tonight," Khun Lee tells me when I pick up the phone on a Friday morning while walking Anya to school. "I've made a YouTube channel for the two of you where we'll post them, along with some other videos we've made of the behind the scenes of your recent appearances."

"Okay," I say. "Where will we film it?"

"Either your place or his. It's up to you."

Since I don't want Anya to be filmed and Spin's apartment is presentable now that he has replaced his furniture, I choose his apartment. The camera and lighting guys arrive an hour early, and Spin and I sit on the new couch to watch the episode.

It's always weird to see myself on film and to watch the series as a finished product. Even though we were there, filming all the scenes, they weren't filmed in order, and we don't know what was kept and what was left out. With the edits and the background music added, it's a completely new experience, and Spin and I watch it with avid attention.

"Wow," Spin says during the scene where Khao is roughed up by a gang in the alleyway behind the office building where he works. "That's so scary."

"When Angel hit the wall there at the end, he broke his finger," I say. Angel played the lead gang member.

Spin nods. "Right, I heard about that."

"Here's the part where you arrive at the office," I say. Spin looks so cute as Boom with his bright smile and eager attitude. When Khao and Boom get smashed together by the crowd in the elevator, their eyes meet and sparks fly. It gives me goosebumps because I really feel that way around Spin.

When the reaction filming is over and the lighting and camera men leave, Spin and I sit on the couch cuddling. My feelings for him have only strengthened during the past few weeks. Our ship is going strong with fans already talking about how anxious they are to see us in another series together. I'm hoping for a rest before that happens, and I know that Spin is, too.

"We've been together all day every day for weeks, but, somehow, it feels like we haven't spent any time together," I say, taking his hand. It's smaller than mine, warm, and soft. We're sitting so close, I could count his individual eyelashes.

He blushes shyly. "I thought I was being greedy, wanting to spend more time with you when we're together all the time already."

"You know we can fix that by having you move into my house," I remind him. It's a subject I've brought up more than once in the past few weeks, but Spin feels we need time to get to know each other before taking such a big step. Rationally, I know that's true, but there's nothing rational about how I feel about him.

Leaning closer, I wait for some signal that he might not want my kiss, but he meets me halfway, pressing his mouth to mine and sucking on my lower lip. It gives me the shivers. Burying one hand in his silky hair, I tug his head back, kissing him deeply before letting my lips trail down his jaw to his neck. He trembles in my arms, which arouses me more than I would have imagined something like that would.

"P'Park," he says breathlessly, then gasps when I nip the skin above his collarbone with my teeth.

"Sorry," I say. "I can't help myself. You make me crazy."

Spin groans and wraps his arms around my neck, pulling me toward him until I'm lying on top of him on the couch. My mouth finds his again, and I spend long moments sweeping my tongue through his mouth while he pushes his erection against my abdomen.

"P'Park," he begs.

I lift off him long enough to pull his shirt over his head and throw it onto the floor. Then my mouth finds one of his small, brown nipples and I suck, eliciting the most delicious sounds from his mouth. His nipples are so sensitive; I love to tease them. I bite into the little nub, and he cries out, arching into me. He's so hard, and so am I.

"I want you, P'Park. I want you so bad." He's panting hard, and I just want to devour him. Leaving his nipple red from my ministrations, I kiss my way downward until I reach the zipper of his pants. My fingers fumble to get it open.

"Can I suck you?" My voice is raspy with need.

Spin answers with a long moan. A moment later, I have his cock in my mouth. I bob and suck, giving everything I've got to drive him over the edge as quickly as possible. Then I want to be inside him.

"Oh, ohhhhh…" Spin grips my hair with one hand and the back of the couch with the other, body thrumming beneath me. In my haste I had only pulled his pants to his knees, so I can't spread his legs but I run my thumbs over the soft skin of his thighs while I work him over with my mouth. He tastes delicious, and I hum low in my throat as I suck him.

Spin's grip in my hair is vicious, but I like it—it shows how much he's loving what I'm doing to him. As his body stiffens and jerks through his climax, I swallow his cum, then lick up what spilled from my mouth. When I finally raise my eyes to look at him, he's wrecked, his pale chest rising and falling in quick breaths and his dark eyes glazed over in repletion.

I can't resist crawling up his body for a soft, heartfelt kiss. "Can I fuck you?" I whisper in his ear .

"Please," he says, turning his head to catch my lips with his. We kiss for several moments, then Spin kicks off his pants and underwear while I get a condom from my wallet.

When I sink into him, I release a low groan at the tight clutch of his body around my cock. Lowering my head and squeezing my eyes shut, I take a moment to enjoy the sensations running through me. I feel Spin kiss the top of my head, and I smile.

Then I start to move. Spin moves with me, meeting each thrust with enthusiasm. Propped on my elbows, I watch his face while he watches mine. It's profoundly intimate and something I don't remember sharing with Pear or with anyone else. I take my time with him until he's hard again and begging me to make him come.

Raising his legs, I find the place inside him that makes him tremble and gasp, hammering it while he squirms beneath me. We reach our peaks simultaneously, Spin's fingers digging into my biceps.

"I want to feel your cum dripping out of me," Spin says fervently.

My cock gives a last, feeble squirt into the condom, and I roll off him.

"Was I too rough?" I ask. "I meant to ask you that about the first time. I get a little carried away."

He blushes. "I like it."

Grinning, I lean over and kiss him before settling with my head on his shoulder.

After we've recovered and I've taken care of the condom, I ask, "How are things with Nok and Bass?"

Spin curls into my side and sighs. "It's weird. For me, not them. I was already having trouble thinking of Nok as an adult, but to see her dating Bass…it's really awkward for me. Maybe they feel it too, and that's why I'm not seeing much of them. "

Noting the hurt in his voice, I kiss the top of his head. "All that will work out in time."

"I hope so."