17. Rip My Heart Apart

Seventeen

Rip My Heart Apart

Elena

Yesterday was amazing. I'm excited about reading my books, but I don't know which one to start with. I sit up in bed and read the titles on their spines.

Axle groans. "Lay back down with me." His voice is husky and sleepy.

He tugs on my arm, but I shoo him away. "I want to read one of my books."

He groans again, more dramatically this time, making me chuckle.

"I should have realized giving you books would take your attention away from me."

"Aww... poor baby," I coo, trying not to laugh that he's jealous of me reading.

The moment I catch the glint of mischief in his eyes, I brace myself for what's to come. In an instant, he leaps up and gently pushes me back onto the bed. He grips my wrists firmly, pinning them down. I can't help but chuckle, but my laughter quickly fades as his lips meet mine, and suddenly, he becomes my entire world once more.

After breakfast I help the women clean up, even though there's an awkward, silent tension between us. Halfway through, Grace throws the tea towel down on the counter and leans over to whisper something to Vera. How much longer will this continue? Will Grace ever accept that Axle and I are together and just move on? I'll never tell Axle about the way they treat me. I can't expect him to fight all of my battles.

After we finish, Candy turns to me. "Why don't we go watch a movie and let the men do whatever they're doing?"

I nod, giving her a small smile. It's good that Candy seems to be nice and tries to include me, despite the other two being passive-aggressive.

Once we're seated on the couch, Candy grabs the remote and glances at me. "You're very happy today."

Vera comes in and takes a seat on the other side of Candy. I give her a wary stare.

"Absolutely, I am!" I beam. "Axle made my birthday yesterday a very special day."

"Oh. My. God. Happy birthday for yesterday!" Candy says joyfully.

"Thank you."

"So you two are serious then?" she asks curiously.

I nod.

She looks cautiously from me to Vera. "Have you said the L word to him yet?"

"What L word?" I ask, confused.

"Have you said ‘I love you' to him yet?"

Vera's inching toward us to better hear our conversation. "Keep going. I want to know your answer," she says with an evil smile that sends a shiver down my spine. I wonder why they're so interested.

"Yes, we've said it to each other."

Candy gives me a forced smile. "I'm so jealous."

"Does Viper know?" Vera asks me.

I frown. I thought she'd be angry to know that me and Axle are serious, but she's not. I cock my head. "How would I know if Viper knows about me and Axle's discussions?"

"Axle would tell Viper," she says, pouting. "I can guarantee that Viper's not happy about it."

Candy bites her lip and shakes her head at Vera.

My stomach drops. I thought Viper liked me. I wonder why he wouldn't want me and Axle to be together. "What's going on?" I ask, my eyes darting between the two of them.

Raised voices make me turn my head toward the kitchen.

"It's showtime!" Vera says, then looks at me. "Follow me if you want to know what I'm talking about."

Anxiety shoots through me. I should stay exactly where I am if Candy's deep frown is anything to go by. Nothing good could come of what Vera has to say, but I don't like secrets and I want to know what she's referring to.

Vera walks down the hallway and I follow. She's smiling smugly and my stomach is queasy, my heartbeat erratic.

"You know you're not the only one Axle's slept with since he's been talking to you," Vera says in a hushed voice.

I shake my head. I don't believe her, because I don't trust her.

She nonchalantly shrugs. "I just thought you should know... because if you love him... I know I'd want to know if he was cheating on me."

I yank at the collar of my shirt, which has constricted around my throat. We keep walking until we reach the kitchen. We're behind the wall, so no one else can see us. There's yelling. The voices belong to Grace and Axle. I start to step forward, but Vera grabs my arm and shakes her head.

"I thought she was a bet... a joke, but you're the one that looks like a fool because you've fallen for her!" Grace yells.

My body grows cold. My mind spins... a bet... a joke. No ! This isn't happening. I grab my heart that's now gaping wide open.

Axle laughs coldly. "You know nothing about how I feel."

Why isn't he calling her a liar?

"Yes, I do," Grace says. "You never looked at me the way you look at her." She's furious, but her voice is tinged with sadness.

"Do you listen to a word I say?" Axle bites back. "I don't know, maybe the one hundredth time I said we were only having sex. Stop your jealousy bullshit and get over it."

"Of course I'm jealous!" she screeches, making me jerk. "I wanted to be your ol' lady."

He scoffs. "Well... that was never going to happen. I didn't even know I wanted an ol' lady until Elena."

"Does your Saint Mother Teresa know about the bet with Viper yet?"

I assume I'm the Mother Teresa she's referring to.

"If you dare say a word to Elena..." His voice is threatening.

Bet ... A wave of nausea hits me. I fight back the urge to vomit. Tears fall fast, wetting my cheeks, but I don't wipe away these tears of pain.

"Congratulations," Grace says in a sickly-sweet tone. "You won the bet—you made her fall in love with you."

And with that the knife goes through my heart and I can feel the jagged end slice right through me.

She giggles loudly. "Have you collected your money from Viper yet?"

And the knife continues pushing through my back. I clasp my hands over my mouth, trying to stop the sobbing.

"That's enough!" Axle shouts.

"I don't want to break her little heart," she mocks. "But I can tell you right now she's going to find out. Secrets don't stay hidden."

"Yes, they can," Axle says harshly.

A cry tears from my mouth. I can't stop it. My chest burns. It's like I'm underwater and trying to breathe. I turn the corner. Grace and Axle look up, startled.

Grace's smile is triumphant. She clicks her tongue. "Oops... looks like she knows now!"

Axle's hands go to his head. "Elena..." He looks distraught, but I don't believe it. He grabs at the base of his throat. "Let me explain," he says, taking a cautious step toward me.

"All this time you were pretending...?" I ask, my voice breaking at the end. "How could I have been so stupid?"

He takes another step, but I move back. "Don't come near me," I cry out through sniffles and a flood of tears.

"That bet was only at the beginning..." he says in a rush of words. "Then I met you, spent time with you... and it all changed for me." His eyes are glassy and he sounds sincere, but all I hear is more lies. Being with him was an illusion. He's exactly the person everyone warned me about.

"I don't believe you!" I yell at him with disgust. "I trusted you... I loved you... How could you?" My voice softens at the end, laying bare the excruciating, raw pain within me.

I turn and leave. I can't even look at him. I run through the house, past people staring at me with open curiosity, with Axle's heavy footsteps behind me. He grabs my arm. I yank it back. "Don't ever touch me again." My voice reverberates through the space, tinged with hurt but also rippling with anger.

"I'm sorry..." He tugs at his hair. "It was before I got to know you... You have to believe me."

I pause to meet his pained gaze. "I've got no reason to believe anything you say anymore." I wipe the tears from my eyes, but it's no use. They keep falling.

He reaches for me again but stops and drops his arm to his side. "I'm sorry," he says again. "I hate that I did this to you. You mean everything to me. You know you do."

I thought I did. I don't know what to believe anymore. A storm brews within me, where sorrow and rage collide. I keep walking up the stairs and still hear him behind me. "If you've ever had any respect for me at all... don't follow me," I hiss. I need to escape this place. I'm suffocating.

He stops and I dash upstairs and to his room. I shove my clothes and books into my bag and swing it over my shoulder. Cash is outside Axle's bedroom when I rush out.

"I'll give you a ride home in the truck," he says.

I realize I'm stuck here otherwise. "Thank you," I whisper, appreciative of his kindness. I follow Cash until we meet Axle, who hasn't moved. I refuse to look at him. How could he be so callous?

"I'll get her home safe," Cash says.

I follow Cash down the stairs and we dart outside, where I struggle to draw air into my lungs. My body is as cold as ice, and my heart constricts. It's alarming how effortlessly Axle lied to me. He told me he loved me, wanted me to move in with him... Devastation and disbelief bleed out of me with every step to the truck.