19. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Roan willingly relinquished his hold on Ben, and my brother's brown eyes met mine. The shift rolled over them, and in a moment he was human again.

‘Lucy?' he said, searching my eyes. ‘What the fuck?'

I grimaced: that was a very loaded question. ‘You got attacked by a werewolf,' I explained. ‘You were dying. To save you, I helped you shift into a werewolf.'

‘How?'

‘I'm a werewolf as well,' I admitted.

Ben looked away as he took it all in and his gaze fell on Jacob and Maxwell. His mouth dropped open.

‘They're friends,' I said hastily. ‘Jacob is a dark seraph and Maxwell is my birth cousin – he's a fire elemental.'

Ben looked back at me. ‘This is a dream,' he muttered. ‘I'm probably in hospital, hooked up to a hundred machines like you were. God, poor Mum and Dad. '

I reached out and pinched him, hard. ‘Ow!' he exclaimed, rubbing his arm.

‘You're not dreaming.'

He stared at me. ‘If I'm not dreaming and Maxwell is your blood relative, then why don't you have flames on your head like he does?'

I sighed. ‘My vampyr great-great-grandfather had my magic extinguished. He hid me in a non-magical place called the Common realm. He hoped it would keep me safe from the people who had murdered my parents.'

Ben's mouth dropped open. ‘They were murdered?'

‘Yes.'

‘By whom?'

‘There was a prophecy when I was born that said I was going to be Queen of the werewolves. A werewolf family, the Frosts, decided to take matters into their own hands.'

‘Jesus, that is so fucked up. You're really serious?' He searched my face.

‘Really.'

‘You always loved fire,' he said suddenly and shook his head. ‘If ever you were upset, looking into the fireplace would calm you down. I always just thought it was some sort of primeval thing – man be safe with flames, ugg – that sort of thing, but it was more than that. It reminded you of home.'

My throat tightened. ‘My grandfather had my childhood memories wiped,' I said. My throat was closing up with tears. ‘I don't remember anything at all.'

‘Maybe not consciously,' Ben said slowly, ‘but on some level you always knew fire was a part of you.'

That made me feel better. My family hadn't been completely ripped from me, and now I'd rediscovered them again.

Ben suddenly looked up and his eyes frantically searched the room. He reached out and grasped my arm. ‘Pollyanna?' he asked urgently. ‘Where is she? Was she hurt?'

‘No,' I promised hastily. ‘She's absolutely fine.' I wondered how much I should tell him. ‘She's actually a seer.'

‘A seer?'

‘She can see the future. I don't know how much, or how good she is at what she does, but she knew enough to beg me to get a particular potion to keep on hand. It saved your life.'

‘Seers? Potions?' He shook his head in denial, then buried it in his hands. I reached out and stroked his back.

It is okay, I heard Roan say to Ben. Do not despair. I will guide you through the Other realm. I am Roan and I am your wolf. As he spoke the last words, his tone was full of wonder. I lifted my hand from my brother's back to give them some privacy.

I grimaced at my lack of control. I hadn't meant to pipe Roan, but emotions were high and with the physical touch I'd reached their minds without conscious effort. That made me uneasy. My powers were strong and the urge to use them to pipe every wolf I met to examine their intentions was unnerving – and very, very wrong. If I chose, I could pipe my enemies and force them to obey me, to like me and be fanatically loyal…

I licked my suddenly parched lips. There was a reason why the Connection monitored pipers: it was all too easy for them to become a force for evil. One little pipe here, another pipe there – all for the greater good, of course – but slowly free will was eroded. It was a slippery slope, and the fear of sliding down it stayed my hand. With effort, I pushed the piping magic back down.

Esme crooned a little in my head to soothe me, proud that I'd resisted temptation. She was also still distressed that she'd hurt me. As I reached for her, she retreated further into my mind. I let her go with regret; even though I held no ill will towards her for the bite, she had to process it on her own. I was grateful for her intervention, no matter how painful it had been. Without her, I could have been stuck in that loop forever – and so could Roan and Ben.

I turned my gaze on my brother. As he and Roan conversed, some of the tension was leaving him. Whatever Roan was saying was making him feel better. I did my best to wait for them to finish but patience had never been my strong suit.

Finally, Ben raised his head out of his hands and looked at me a little wild eyed. ‘You know Roan?' he asked.

‘He was once with Noah, one of my pack. Roan sacrificed himself to save him.'

‘Then how come he's in my head?' Ben frowned.

I shook my head. ‘I put him there, though I'm not quite sure how. Desperation makes you do crazy things, like when a mother can lift a car off her trapped child.'

‘You lifted a car off me?'

‘It was the supernatural equivalent of that,' I agreed. ‘What I did shouldn't have been possible.' I didn't explain that I'd been made magical by Glimmer and consequently I existed outside the normal rules. Magical sentient daggers might have been too much for him to deal with at that moment.

Greg gave Ben a small smile. ‘Welcome to the pack,' he murmured. ‘Here.' He passed Ben some black joggers. Ben stared at him. ‘You're a werewolf, too? '

Greg nodded. ‘I was born to a dragon-shifter, though I didn't possess the ability to shift until Jessica Sharp stabbed me with a magical dagger imbued with werewolf magic.'

Okay, so much for me not telling Ben; Greg obviously thought Ben could handle the magical dagger thing.

‘Jess?' Ben said, startled. ‘She's magical as well?'

‘Yes,' I confirmed. ‘But she only discovered that recently. Her parents kept her magic hidden from her.'

My brother rubbed his forehead. ‘This is all a bit much,' he said finally. ‘Where is Pollyanna?' he repeated. ‘You said she was okay.'

‘She was,' I bit my lip. ‘She left when she was sure you were going to be alright.'

He blinked. ‘She left me?'

‘Yes. I'm sorry.'

He frowned as he pulled on the black joggers. He was still shirtless, but at least I didn't have to see my brother's wang. He started looking around the room. ‘Where's my phone?' he asked, sounding exasperated.

Tristan held it out to him together with a key. ‘This is my third, Tristan,' I introduced him hastily.

Ben gave Tristan a half-hearted nod in greeting then reached for the phone. He stared at the key. After a moment, he snagged both with a muttered ‘thanks'. He unlocked the phone and hastily dialled a number. With my heightened hearing, I heard the almost instant disconnect tone.

‘She hung up on me,' he said faintly, looking at me in wounded disbelief. ‘And she gave me back the key to my house.'

I squeezed his arm sympathetically, but for the first time in a long time I had nothing to say to him. Pollyanna had undoubtedly saved his life but then she'd abandoned him, seemingly cut herself out of his life with surgical precision. And we had no idea why.

Ben blew out a breath. ‘What do I do?' he asked plaintively. ‘I have a wolf in my head.'

I smiled. ‘You do – and he'll be the best friend you ever had.' Then I hesitated. Back when I'd been turned, Lord Samuel had insisted that I return to the mansion and live among the pack for at least four weeks whilst I acclimatised to the wolf that was now residing in my skin.

It had been different then; the Great Pack had been sheared from us by the witch's curse and the wolves and their human counterparts had lost the ability to communicate. Shifting had become a wrestle for supremacy rather than a joyous union. Forced to become no more than a bound and gagged parasite, the wolves had become even more desperate for control, for a few moments of true freedom. If the Great Pack hadn't been restored, more packs like Frost's would have arisen, controlled by force and fear and a far cry from the family unit they should be.

Ben and Roan were lucky: they'd be bonded with the Great Pack. Like me, they would never know what it was like to be forever separate. Still, Ben had a lot to come to terms with and a whole new magical realm to learn about. And then there was the painful complication of Noah to consider.

‘You should come to the mansion,' I said finally. ‘You need to learn about the pack and about magic. Roan will guide you, but you've always been a learn-by-doing person.'

Ben licked his lips. ‘What about work?'

I shrugged. ‘Quit, take some holidays or go off sick.' I paused. ‘The pack doesn't have a lawyer on retainer and we could do with one. Just … think about it.'

‘I think I'll be doing nothing else for quite some time to come.'

I grimaced; he wasn't wrong.

‘I'm going to bed,' he said abruptly.

As Tristan wordlessly showed him to one of the bedrooms, a yawn cracked my face. ‘Bedtime,' Greg said softly. He came over to me and before I could say anything he'd effortlessly lifted me over his shoulder, startling laughter from me.

‘I wasn't going to say no!' I said between giggles. ‘I'm exhausted – there's no need to manhandle me.'

‘I'm in the mood to manhandle you,' he murmured for my ears alone.

‘So what are you waiting for?' I asked. ‘You know how I love your man handle.' I snickered.

‘It's not a handle,' he huffed.

‘Sure it is,' I cooed back. ‘All it needs is a certain touch and you're on your knees.'

‘The only one going on their knees is you,' he growled.

‘Promises, promises,' I said airily.

He grunted as he strode into our room at Rosie's and shut the door behind us. He threw me onto the bed, making me bounce. He might have been my beta, but in the bedroom he was a total alpha and I loved every minute of it.