Chapter 19

Irelax into the soft cushions of the rocker, sitting on the porch of Roman’s retreat, and thank the stars once again that I have such an amazing friend. And one that is filthy rich. When I took off from Gus’ place last night, I called Roman. I told him I needed to use his woodland retreat to factory reset myself after all the shit that went down yesterday. Thankfully, he talked me out of doing the 6 hour hike and instead had his helicopter meet me at the small clearing where we park our cars. I mean, not that I wouldn’t have been able to handle that hike in the dark, but as someone who grew up having bush survival drilled into her, night hikes are just asking for trouble.

Arriving last night meant that I could get up with the warm spring sun, and sit and clear my head on the big flat rock a short walk from Roman’s log cabin. It overlooks the river that runs through the property, and listening to the sound of nature, the water trickling through, gave me a sense of peace that I desperately needed.

Last night I spent tossing and turning, kicking myself over not seeing what was right in front of me. How could I not see that one of my closest friends, someone I could rely on through thick or thin, was a snake this whole time? My stomach was in knots as I replayed every interaction we had over and over, asking myself if maybe I listened more, or perhaps I spent more time with him, things may have been different.

But this morning, sitting on that rock with a blanket wrapped around my shoulders and a steaming hot cup of tea by my side, I realized it wasn’t my fault that I didn’t see his intentions or character earlier. How could I? People allow you to see what they want you to see. He hid himself from me, and worse still, from Roman.

So I sat there, waiting for the sun to climb higher in the sky and by the time the warmth reached my face I realized I could sit on that rock and wallow in the betrayal, add him to the list of people I’ve lost in my life and close my heart off for safekeeping, or, I could brush it off and let the feelings blow away into the wind.

And that’s what I did. I had to. Because I may have lost one friend in Ivan, but I still had Jenn and every other loyal friend I’ve made since I’ve been here.

When I spoke to Roman, he told me he and Sasha had just returned from breaking the news to Jenn. As far as Jenn knows, Ivan was killed in the line of work, a single gunshot wound to the head. The funeral will be arranged after the ME releases his body, and she will need all of us to help her through this time, no matter our feelings for her husband. Which for me, will remain complicated for a little while yet.

I tip the rocker back, using my toe to push against the warm wood of Roman’s porch before kicking off my Uggs and tucking my feet up underneath me, letting the movement soothe me. I may have sorted one lot of feelings out on that big, flat rock, but now I’m consumed by other feelings. Guilt for how I left last night. Guilt for turning off my phone after speaking to my mum and Roman. Guilt for not calling Gus and letting him know what was going on. How the hell am I going to make this up to him? Last night I was a bitch and then ran without a word. I know my husband. He’ll be going out of his mind with worry, and it’s my fault. I can only hope Dayz or Roman passed on the message that I’m only going to be away for two days, but you can never be too sure and if I turn on my phone to call him I’m certain I’ll see missed calls from him and I’ll feel even shittier for what I’ve done to the poor man. Argh!

I angrily pick at the fluff on my comfy sweatpants when a clanging noise breaks through the sounds of the bush. Looking up, I can see birds leaving one tree for another further away. I put down my fifth cup of tea in as many hours, standing and shoving my feet into my Uggs to see if I can get a better idea on what the hell is making that god awful racket.

The clanging sound seems to get louder and closer. It’s clearly not an animal because there is no reason an animal would be that bloody loud in its own habitat. Twigs snapping now join the metallic sound, which is actually quite rhythmic, as if it’s something swinging back and forth.

“Fuck’s sake!” The expletive is growled out and my knees can’t hold me up. I plop down into the rocker, my hands coming up to my mouth. I recognize that growl. My eyes are glued to the small, barely there path that cuts through the trees. Another growl breaks the silence and I watch with rapt attention as my big, handsome, growly husband steps into the clearing, wearing his ridiculously new and shiny hiking gear, a stupidly large hiking pack on his back. His metal drink bottle and cup are swinging from a side strap, knocking against each other.

My eyes devour the sight of him. Here, 6 hours from the road, through dense wood where he has obviously walked to find me. He scowls at something on his leg before he glances up, locking eyes with me. He freezes. The only thing moving is the ticking of his jaw. Judging by the look on his face, he’s unsure whether he should sweep me up or tan my hide. Or both.

He stands stock still, not moving, but that’s ok because I realized something when I was on that rock this morning. Gus has made all the moves in this relationship, and I’ve spent the whole time working out exit strategies. I convinced myself that I was going to have to walk away to keep my heart intact. But I could never do it. I love him. I am in love with my husband. And instead of being a pussy, as Pops would say, I’m going to be the badass bitch that ran the Bartashev Bratva, for an albeit short time, and I’m going to make the next move. I’m going to take what I want, consequences be damned. And what I want is August Tombs and all the crazy that comes with him.

Holding Gus’s gaze, I slowly stand, stepping off the porch, one step at a time, until my feet hit the ground. We hold each other’s gaze and then I’m running. My legs pump, the distance between us shrinks until I launch myself at him, and, because it’s Gus and he is the most in control, dependable man I’ve ever met, he catches me.

She comes flying at me, landing in my arms, exactly where she belongs. I can’t even begin to describe the feelings coursing through my body. Relief that she’s here, safe. The anger that she put herself at risk hiking 6 hours in the fucking dark; we will be having a conversation about that. And love. I love this woman so fucking much and even though she put me through hell the past 12 hours; she ran to me. To trust me with her heart. To catch her. The feeling of her here, in my arms, feels like heaven. Well, almost. I’d feel a lot fucking better having her in my arms if they weren’t half dead thanks to straps of my pack digging into my shoulders.

“Babe, as much as I love holding you, I need to put you down and get this fucking pack off my back. And these fucking boots off my feet.” She pulls back to look at me, her eyes glistening and a huge grin on her face. She loosens her grip on me and I place her on her feet before unhooking my arms and dropping the pack that holds all my camping supplies and enough snacks to last 3 weeks.

I drop it on the ground, and then for the first time take in my surroundings.

“What the fuck?!” I vaguely noticed Ana sitting on a porch, but my eyes were locked on my wife, not the fucking opulent log cabin with an entire wall of windows. “I thought you were out here camping?”

Ana turns to look at the house behind her before shrugging her shoulders. “I usually do. I packed my tent, but Roman offered me the house and a ride up here because of the late hour.”

“Wait, what? A ride? So you didn’t fucking hike 6 hours in the dark?” She frowns at me before answering.

“No. Roman had his helicopter pick me up in the clearing next to the car park.”

“Helicopter.” At this point, I’m just repeating what she’s saying.

“Um, yeah. There’s a helipad at the back of the house. Wait, didn’t you talk to Roman? I thought that’s how you would have found me?”

I stare at her for a moment and in my mind curse Roman in every swear word I know. That motherfucker.

“Roman is the one who told me where to find you. He also told me it would be best to spend last night at home and then start the 6 hour hike up here at first light. The Russian prick.” I watch as humor dances in her eyes, her lips pulled between her teeth as she tries not to laugh.

She leans sideways to take a good look at my pack before straightening up and looking up at me.

“Did you bring your tent?”

I let out a long sigh, my eyes closing. “Yeah, I was planning on camping with you until you were ready to come back home.”

Ana’s eyes drop to our feet, before looking up at me, glittering with unshed tears. Her tiny hand reaches up and cups my cheek, allowing me to nuzzle into her.

“Oh Gus, my brave, beautiful husband.” She whispers out. My eyes open and I stare down at her.

“Ana, my brave, beautiful wife,” I whisper back. A tear slides down her cheek and I brush it away with my thumb. I drop my forehead to hers, breathing in her sweet scent. I then realize the more pungent smell overpowering hers would be me. I drop a quick kiss to her lips before pulling away.

“Babe, as much as I want to stand here and ravage you, I really need to get inside and take a shower. I fucking reek.” She pulls back from me, throwing her head back in laughter.

“Ok, lemme show you around, then you take a shower and we will do some ravaging,” she giggles as she takes my hand and pulls me along behind her up the steps and into Roman’s cabin. It’s fucking beautiful and tranquil and it makes me hate the guy even more that he made me hike up here. Even so, it was worth every fucking step when I saw the shock and awe in Ana’s face that I was here. For her.

I stop in my tracks, tugging on her hand, pulling her to a stop. She turns to look at me and, as relieved as I am to be here, there’s still some shit that needs to be taken care of.

“You ran from me, Ana. You left without a word. Do you know how much that hurt me? Do you know how worried I was? Wondering if you were coming back or if you were hurt somewhere?”

She furrows her brows, guilt written all over her face, as she dips her eyes and looks at her feet.

“Gus, I - I’m so sorry. I was all twisted up about counseling and Ivan and it was all too much.” She peers up at me with those brilliant green eyes, and I know I can’t hold it against her. Where her trauma has led her to run, mine has led me to hold on too tight. Maybe if we work on it together, we can meet somewhere in the middle.

“I understand baby, just next time, leave a note, yeah?” She bobs her head at me and her lips curl on the edges. “And don’t think you won’t be punished, Wife. I’m going to redden that ass for every time I pictured my life without you in it, for every time I sniffed your pillow trying to draw your scent into my lungs because you weren’t in my arms. You owe me that much, Ana.” She brings my hand up to her lips, kissing my knuckles with her lush lips.

“I owe you much more than that,” she whispers before she turns and leads me into the master bedroom. Two walls are lined with floor to ceiling windows. The view is breathtaking, and yet I’m finding it hard to tear my eyes away from Ana. She leads me into the giant ensuite and I have to admit to myself that I cannot wait to get in there and wash away 6 hours of dust, dirt, and nature. The shower takes up one entire wall with so many shower heads. I have no idea how to work them all, but Ana does, so she sets everything up for me, allowing the water to warm.

Without a word, she tugs at the bottom of my Henley, running her hands up my sides before helping me remove it and throwing it on the floor somewhere behind me. She kneels at my feet and unlaces my boots, giving me time to kick them off to the same place my shirt went. She unbuttons my pants, the ones the man sold me, made of some type of breathable material that makes an annoying “swishy” sound as I walk. She tugs them down, taking my boxers with her, ignoring my hardening cock as it points directly at her, wanting to say hello. She pulls everything down to my ankles, allowing me to step out of them and then she stands, gathers up my clothing and stops in front of me with my stinking bundle of gear in her hands. She looks at me, chewing on her bottom lip a little.

“I’ve turned on the massage jets. You shower, Gus, and I’ll take care of this. I’ll be waiting for my punishment in the bedroom,” she averts her eyes, looking coy, and my dick goes from half mast to full. Well, as spectacular as this shower is, I don’t think I’ll be lingering, especially knowing what waits for me on the other side of the door.

I rush through washing myself, barely letting the 5000 jets massage my aching muscles. I may be city fit, but getting up at dawn, driving two hours to the clearing and then hiking 6 hours has left me tired and sore in places I didn’t even know I could be. Roman, that Russian asshole, is definitely going to pay for this. Stepping out of the shower, I dry myself roughly with the towel Ana left for me, wrapping it around my waist as I step out into the bedroom, and then I freeze.

Sitting naked at the end of the bed is my wife. Her long, black hair is loose, tumbling over her shoulders, flowing down to the middle of her back. My cock is hard enough to pound nails, resting against my belly. Ana is a fucking beautiful sight that has my cock leaking like a faucet. I take two deep breaths to calm myself down. If I can’t get myself under control, then this punishment will be over before it begins.

I stand in front of Ana, letting my towel drop. I draw my finger down her cheek, under her chin before tipping her face up to mine, letting her see how much I want her.

“I’m going to spank that luscious ass of yours.” I hold her gaze and her eyes flutter closed before opening and staring into the depths of my soul. Fuck. Closing my eyes, I tip my head back, rolling my shoulders and breathing out, before meeting her gaze again.

“Do you have anything to say, baby?”

“I’m sorry.”

I raise my brow at her. “What for?”

She gulps, “I’m sorry that I got scared and upset and I ran away from you. I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you about it. I’m sorry that you were worried. I-I’m just, sorry,” her voice tapers off to a whisper at the end. I kiss her softly before pulling back.

“Because you apologized so sweetly, I’m going to feed you my cock before I spank you. Would you like that?” She bobs her head at me, holding my gaze as she slides off the bed onto her knees, licking her lips. Shit, I might be punishing myself more than I’m punishing her right now.

“Open wide and stick your tongue out.” She’s fucking perfect and does exactly as I say, her pink tongue sticking out, waiting for me. I pump myself twice, angling my cock head just above her, watching as I drip onto her pretty pink tongue. She makes a groaning noise at the back of her throat and I watch as she swallows what I’ve given her before sticking her tongue out again, eager and waiting. I decide to tease her a little, slapping her cheeks gently with my dripping dick, before slowly feeding him into her hot, wet mouth. She wraps those pretty lips around me and sucks me with so much vigor my eyes cross.

Between the suction of her mouth and her tongue working up and down my shaft, I’m worried I won’t last long. I cup her gorgeous face in my hands before running my fingers back through her hair, pulling it away from her face so I have the perfect view of her, her gaze holding mine as she works my cock with her mouth. I’m shallowly thrusting my hips, I don’t want to go too deep and hurt her, but that seems to be the least of her worries as she pulls off my dick, smirks up at me and then dives back on, taking me so deep that her nose nestles into the hair at the base of my cock. I let out a groan when I feel her tongue wriggling on my balls and her fingers tugging at them. I can feel the telltale tingle in my balls and the base of my back, but I’m not coming down her throat. The only place I’m coming is in her tight, pink heat.

I pull back from her, staring at her, the saliva on her face, her cheeks flushed, her eyes dazed. Fuck, my wife is going to ruin me. I sit on the edge of the bed, watching her as she wipes her drool and my pre-cum off her face.

“Stand up baby. I need you over my knee. Give me that pretty ass.” She does exactly what I say, rising to her feet so gracefully before coming to stand in front of me. I stare at the cleft between her legs, her pretty pussy topped with her trimmed dark landing strip, and I see the unmistakable glistening of her folds. She places herself over my knee, the top of her body resting on the bed, her ass in the air, the tangy scent of her perfuming the room. I run my hand over her generous globes before landing two swift, firm spanks. She lets out a squeak, her ass clenching before relaxing, the pink handprints creating a burn before I rub it out.

“I’m going to spank you ten times, baby. I think that’s a fair punishment, don’t you?” I hear her murmured “Yes” so I land all ten blows in quick succession before kneading the burn out of her plump ass.

Using both hands, I spread her cheeks apart, looking down to see her glistening pussy peeking out from between her luscious thighs. I let a string of saliva drip out of my mouth onto her pussy, and using one hand to keep her ass spread, I massage my spit into her folds, dipping my thick finger into her, teasing her slightly before pulling back. She’s so fucking wet for me and I know she’s aching. But she hasn’t earned my cock yet, or hell, even her orgasm. Not yet. I continue to tease, running my finger through her lips, pulsing in and out of her as she writhes in my lap, pushing her ass back at me every time I pump in.

“That’s it, little wife. Take what I’m giving you. I want you to spill all over my fingers, get them nice and wet.”

“Gus, I need you,” she moans at me, but she’s not getting what she wants just yet.

I tease her a little more, adding another finger, wriggling them in her channel, her juices squelching at my movements. Her whines let me know she’s getting close, so I pull back, running my soaking fingers around the outside of her lips, massaging her plump cheeks, letting her come down a little before diving back in and starting the teasing again. I do this over and over, whispering filthy things to her, letting her know she deserves everything I’m giving her, but she doesn’t deserve to come until I say so. I twist my fingers inside her so I can rub that rough patch of skin inside her. She bucks up in my lap, ass high enough in the air for me to drop down and lick her little back hole, puckering under my attention.

“Please Gus, please let me come!” She begs, twisting in my lap so she’s looking at me over her shoulder, her cheeks flushed, hair stuck to her face, eyes wild, lips parted.

She’s so fucking beautiful. I lean back, wrapping one hand gently around her throat so that she’s looking at me dead on, and pump my fingers brutally.

“Never again, Ana. Please, never run from me again.”

Her eyes roll back a little, her mouth hanging open. I pull my fingers from her and slap her ass before shoving them back in.

“N-never. I promise.” She licks her lips, and I feel her swallow before she closes her eyes. I can feel how close she is, so I bring her to the precipice of her orgasm before letting her go, lifting her off my lap, and placing her on the bed on her stomach. Swiftly I kneel over her, my knees on the outside of her legs angling my cock into her glistening hole. Holding steady at her entrance, I lean forward and growl in her ear, “Come, Ana,” Then in one smooth thrust, I’m home.