29. Reed

Chapter twenty-nine

Reed

If she needs a second, I’ll give her a thousand. I unhook her bra from where it’s twisted around her waist and work out the knots in her back. She’s not used to holding that position, and she’ll undoubtedly be sore tomorrow.

“You didn’t call time on me,” I tease, soothing the sting from my serious lapse in reasoning. I was invincible, on top of the world in a way I’d never truly appreciated. Now that I know what it’s like to have my sexual identity stripped from me, her obedience is even more exhilarating. But Petra’s got her own scars and trauma, and I need to help her work through this to keep her afloat. “God, Pet, having you surrender to me? Talk about a fantasy I didn’t know I needed. How’s your ass?”

She wiggles, testing it, and I want to take a bite. “It’s fine. It didn’t hurt more than in the second it happened. Even then, it didn’t hurt- hurt. Does that make sense?” She turns her head to blink up at me. “I’m sober-drunk.”

I lay down beside her, nuzzling her cheek, kissing her softly. It’s the first of a hundred apologies I’ll make for thoroughly losing myself in her. “I’m sober-drunk around you every minute. What rational thinking? What self-control? I have neither when I’m with you. I didn’t even ask for your safe word, baby.”

“I would’ve used Bambi. Bambi, ” she chuckles, and then her whole body shakes with them.

It’s an almost-silent laughter that goes hand in hand with her in these vulnerable moments. She’s actively working through her coping mechanism, though, even when she buries her face in her hands and laughs.

“Jesus, Reed. That was the opposite of me taking responsibility.”

My smile slides off my face, and I rub a gentle hand down her spine, determined to give her some level of aftercare. “I know. I’m sorry, Pet. Do you regret it?”

“No,” she giggles into the mattress.

When she lifts her face again, she’s blushing. Beautiful. Vibrant.

“No,” she repeats more seriously. The smirk that pulls at the corner of her mouth is all feminine satisfaction. She’s riding high from her orgasm. “I should’ve known you don’t concede that easily. My insistence was ridiculous anyway, we definitely would’ve had sex. Zero percent chance we would’ve held back.”

I knew that, but to hear her say it has me throbbing. I swallow against the renewed sense of need and try not to let it show as I comb her hair away from her face. “I’m still sorry. It was my first time letting go in a while, and there were some things that caught me off guard. New things to discuss in therapy.”

“Therapy is good. But you didn’t hurt me, Reed. You asked if I wanted you to stop. If I’d said yes, I guarantee you would’ve. I’m glad you didn’t, though. That was incredible.”Her eyes are winter shifting into spring—the first freshly green leaves among the dark, frozen soil—warming after a long winter chill. She brushes her nose against mine, and we meet in a slow kiss that has ashes flaring into wildfires. My hands roam everywhere, mapping the softness of her skin. She gifts me with a slow, sly smile. “You don’t have to suffer in silence.”

“I’m fine,” I say. It’s only a half-lie. I need to make sure she’s not going to bolt once the shock wears off. “Want a blanket? Let me untie you.” Petra shakes her head, leaving me to figure out what she needs. “I can run a bath, or put on some white noise and spoon you. Let me be what you need, Pet.”

“Aftercare applies to both parties, Reed. What about what you need?” Petra turns on her side, the peak of her breast tight and dark, and it takes all my effort to direct my gaze to her face. Her smile widens. “Help me up?”

“Of course,” I say, reaching for her bindings.

She frowns. “Leave it. That’s not what I said. Help me up.”

My brain moves sluggishly as I get to my feet and help her stand. I pull her close by her forearms and check her hands anyway. Her color is fine, and I can slide two fingers under the tie. Not bad for heat-of-the-moment.

Petra tilts her face up, soft and serene. “I told you I’m fine.”

“Just checking,” I say. She’s undeniably hot: rosy-cheeked, lips swollen, wrists bound. I tuck the straps of her bra under the bindings and over her hands so it falls to the floor.

She laughs. “One hell of a magic trick.”

I brush her hair behind her shoulder, her skin soft and dewy. “What’s going on in there? Let me in your head, Pet.”

“Don’t worry, I’m about to make it clear.” Petra grins and pushes my chest with her bound hands. I stumble back, catching myself on the chaise next to the window. “Sit.”

I see where she’s going with this, and I’m lightheaded. “You don’t have to—” It’s a halfhearted protest. My dick is completely on board.

“Sit,” she demands, pushing at my chest again. I drop like a stone onto the seat, and Petra laughs. Her head back tilts back with it, lengthening the column of her neck. She’s more exquisite than I imagined as she braces her hands on my shoulders to sink to her knees. She’s not shy or giggling, though joy still lingers in the brightness of her eyes. She’s confident, determined, amused. It’s an even headier combination.

“You’re a vision.” I stroke her cheek, and she closes her eyes and leans into it.

“You wanted me tied up, Reed, and I am. You want to be dominant? Do it.”

Jesus. Want and responsibility tear me apart. I shake my head, and when she opens her mouth to protest, I smother it with a kiss. I lose my composure as I dive into her mouth. She pulls at my waistband and wraps her hands around my cock, freeing it from the stifling material. I hold on to the back of her neck so I can kiss her as long as I want, and she moans into my mouth.

“Oh,” I groan, wanting that vibration everywhere. Needing more eyes, lips, and hands. I never have enough of them when I’m with her. When I withdraw, her chest heaves, and her lips are red and full. “Tell me you want it.”

She doesn’t hesitate. “I want it.”

“Explicitly, Petra.”

She swallows, but when she speaks, her voice is husky. “I want to make you feel the way I do. You don’t just get me off, Reed. You cherish me. I want you to feel that. I want you to know it with your cock in my mouth. I want you to picture me when you close your eyes, tesoro mio . I want you to come down my throat. I want your orgasm to belong to me, the way mine belongs to you.”

It’s painful how hard I throb at that. My aural kink mixed with her voice is going to kill me.

“I forgot. I keep forgetting and I don’t know why. Come here, Reed.”

She beckons me in, and between me bending low and her stretching up to my ear, her bare skin presses against mine and sets off fireworks across my body. Petra kisses my jaw, my ear, and then her bound hands nestle my cock between her tits.

“You’re the only man to make me come with his mouth,” she murmurs, feathering her lips across my shoulder. “To make me orgasm when I’m told to. The only man I’ve wanted to talk dirty with, Reed. Your fantasy? I’d do it. I wished I was wearing something sheer on the beach when you unzipped my coat, tesoro . Do you think anyone paid attention to us on the bluffs? I would’ve. Your eyes shined with my nipple in your mouth and your hand around my neck. I loved it, but this time I want you to choke me with something else.”

“Oh God,” I groan, gripping the seat of the chaise for dear life. The combination of her silken skin and her soft words in my ear send my system into overload. Each syllable is sex—my name is pure sin. Her words pour over me like lava, seeping through my pores and filling me like an empty vessel until I’m drowning in liquid fire.

“Take them off, Reed,” she demands. She doesn’t have to tell me twice. I’m naked within a second, and her gaze drips, lingers, and warms my skin like hot wax. She might be kneeling with her wrists tied, but I’m completely at her mercy. “Rugby is so underrated.”

“Have you ever watched a game?” I ask. She smiles as she shakes her head, then drops away to lick a hot stripe from root to tip, swirling her tongue over the head of my cock before repeating the motion. Her eyes glimmer as she sucks me down, and my hands dive into her hair. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, Pet.”

She retreats, laughing. “Is this how you felt earlier, when I couldn’t think of anything but you? You make me feel invincible. Powerful.”

“You have immense power over me.” I hope she hears it down to her soul. Her smile falters, becomes something soft and warm before she blinks it away and replaces it with one that is positively feline. She reaches between her thighs, and her hand comes up shiny and wet as she wraps it around my cock. I moan as she coats it, working me through her fists until I roll my hips into her touch. “Your cum kink is gonna kill me, Petra.”

“Do I have one?” She grins and lifts back onto her knees and tucks my cock between the warmth of her tits. I play with her nipples, squeezing her tighter around me. She’s so soft. “You said you were obsessed with my breasts, Reed. Hope you don’t mind me using that to my advantage.”

She’s thoroughly enjoying herself. I refuse to blink, determined to commit this moment to memory. “Do you hear me complaining?”

“I think you want to hear me. Right, Reed?”

She keeps saying my name, knowing it drives me wild. The tight, wet slide of our skin is electrifying.

“It’s your turn to confess your favorites. Did you like the crack of your hand on my skin? My voice in your ear? The way I moaned for you? That one does me in, Reed—hearing how desperate you are for me.”

I let her set the pace and run my fingers through her hair, amused, bewildered, utterly captivated. “ Jesus. You’re the switch.”

“Am I?” Her eyes widen. “I just love knowing that you want me.”

“You’re the only person I’ve wanted like this, Pet.” I pin her ribs with my knees to hold her there, tilting her head back to devour her. I delve deep into her mouth, my need to dominate her simmering under the surface. When I retreat, she nips her way down my throat and across my chest.

“Does your slow, sleepy scenario include the other way around?” she asks, uncertain again. “If I spent an hour on my knees for you, is that fantasy material?”

I laugh in disbelief. “ Is that fantasy material? Petra, you left fantasy in the dust twenty minutes ago.”

“Good,” she says, smirking. She rocks back on her heels and her mouth is everywhere, from my jaw to my thighs . I don’t know what’s hotter, the heat of her, the silk of her lips on my skin, the sound of her sucking like I’m the best thing she’s tasted. It’s torture, because I want each slippery, profane sound, but I also want to bury myself inside her.

I clench my fist around my last shreds of control as she moves over me. Her edging is brutal, and she shows no sign of tiring.

“Petra,” I groan, and her dark eyes meet mine with a fire in them that makes me throb. I want her tongue playing over my cock, I want her tits, I want her mouth. I want, I want, I want.

“I know,” she sighs against my skin.

I need this to go on forever—I’m worried that I’m going to come in the next ten seconds. “I need to fuck your mouth, baby.”

She moans. “I need it, too.”

I cup her jaw in my hand and guide her down, sliding my cock deep into her throat—not teasing this time, but in earnest. My heart leaps, hammering against my ribs, and sweat drips down my cheek as I hold myself back .

She swallows, tight around my cock, holding me as long as I need before I pull her off and do it again. “That’s it. Look at me, Pet,” I encourage, fucking her mouth deeper, faster. She chokes, eyes tearing up, but doesn’t retreat. If anything, she doubles down, gagging. “Let up if you need to, darling.”

“No,” she protests between panting breaths. Her hands tremble against my thighs. “I trust you. I want you as deep as I can.”

God. Her breath play fascination sends me spiraling. I don’t trust myself with her hair, so I explore her back, splaying my fingers wide over her spine. She moans, pulling me in deeper, and the vibration is everything. Time slows as she looks up at me and works her pretty lips over my cock. She’s not shy as retreats, just to tease me, using her tongue and her fist to drive me insane.

I’m fucking desperate for her, and need builds inside me relentlessly, like a spring coiled too tight. I can’t catch my breath. My muscles bunch, heat radiating through them like a warning bell. “Can you take more?”

Petra nods and opens for me as I slide as far down her throat as possible. There are wet drops on her lashes and her face is flushed. Her eyes crease, like she’d smile if she could. She’s so goddamn sexy.

“If you want to tap out, Pet,” I warn, “now’s the time.”

She swallows around me, and that’s all it takes. The dam of want, need, and fiery desire breaks open, flooding my senses. I come with a groan, spilling down her throat, with Petra’s eyes locked on mine the whole time. She holds onto my sides as she gulps it down, and fuck , she makes me shake.

“God, Petra,” I gasp, and let my head fall back as the world spins. She pulls back to finish swallowing, clutching my thighs for balance as she catches her breath.

“How’s that for tapping out?” Petra huffs a gentle laugh against my skin, placing kisses everywhere she can reach. She’s shivering, but proud. She deserves to be.

“Cheeky woman.” I’m still out of breath when I yank her up off her knees and onto my lap. She loops her bound hands over my head to snuggle closer while I swipe my thumb over her swollen lower lip and massage her jaw. Though she doesn’t show it, she has to be sore. Meanwhile, I’m fantastic. The spinning slowly dissolves into a familiar lightness that makes me sleepy. The only reason my eyes stay open is because I know I’ve only got a limited amount of time left to look at her before I board my plane. If I ever thought I’d be able to walk away from Petra, I was delusional.

I hide my fierce grin in the curve of her neck. “How are you feeling?”

“Me?” she asks. “Your orgasm was mine. I had you breathless and moaning because you wanted me. You might resemble a king on your throne, but right now I feel like a queen.”

Because she is. I cover her with a thousand kisses, craving her skin against mine for as long as possible. Her wrists are pink when I untie her, and I brush my lips to the marks over and over in both apology and reverence.

Petra lifts my head. “I wouldn’t change a thing, tesoro .”

I nod, and when the worry dissipates, pride takes its place. This brave woman, giggling and uneasy just a week ago, sensual and self-assured in my arms. “You amaze me. But next time we’re setting limits and ground rules before I lose my ability to reason. Shower?”

She nods and climbs off my lap. I turn off the mic before I scoop her up and carry her to the bathroom. Her mouth drops open. “Oh my God, I forgot we were recording.”

“I can’t wait to listen to it. I should’ve had the mic on my lap during that audiogasmic scene,” I lament. “I hope it caught your whisper. I’ll play that back every night of my life.”

“Shut up,” Petra laughs, rolling her eyes. She doesn’t know I’m dead serious.

I step into the shower with her, and we kiss under the spray, our hands roaming. When we towel off, her ass is still rosy.

“It’s beyond hot, Pet,” I admit, rubbing lotion into her pink skin. “My marks on you. It’s a heady thing.”

“Yeah,” she says, squeezing my arm. “ It is.”

When we slide under the covers, naked and tangled together, Petra’s exhausted. She tries to stay awake to talk, but with a few strokes of my fingers over her cheek, her eyes flutter shut.

“Pet?” I ask, when she’s on the edge of sleep. “What does tesoro mio mean?”

“My treasure. My darling,” she mumbles.

She doesn’t wake further, though my heart skips several beats and pounds louder than waves crashing in my ears. I press a tender kiss to her hair as my plan solidifies. I belong here. In Portland. With Petra.

I hold her for a while longer, then grab my laptop and sneak to the living room.

Portland, Portland, Portland.

The city is a lighthouse, beckoning me home.