16. Petra

Chapter sixteen

Petra

The golden ray of morning light through the gap in the curtains signals that it’s time to go. Saying goodbye when Reed hits the road will only be awkward. There’s no need to get emotional or wax poetic, even if talking with him is as easy as if I’ve known him my whole life.

I sneak out of bed and tiptoe to the bathroom. After I wash my hands and replace Reed’s sleep shirt with my blouse, there’s a knock on the door. Reed doesn’t wait for an answer before he opens it. He leans against the door jamb, eyes raking over my half-dressed form. “Are you going to make a habit of leaving while I’m asleep?”

“Yes.” I reach for my pants, but Reed tugs them out of my hands.

“Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate your figure in clothes, but your bare legs are fantastic.” I blush as he pulls me in close, smoothing his palms down my thighs. “Are you running out on me to meet another man?”

“What?”

He laughs, the creases from his eyes blending with the creases from his pillowcase. He makes the most ridiculous things attractive. “I meant Jesus. It’s Sunday, and your dad wanted you to be a nun. Are you headed to church?” It shouldn’t warm me all over that he listened—and remembered—but it does. “I’ve gotten out of the habit, but I grew up a nice Baptist boy and say my fair share of prayers. I’d go with you, if you wanted.”

I shake my head, digesting this new piece of Reed. The more I know, the less his puzzle pieces fit together—as if I’m forcing them together on a tabletop when he’s a sphere. “You’re a better Christian than me. I’m not going to Mass. I’ve been angry with God for a long time.”

“I see.” Reed wraps his arms around my waist, pressing us together. He’s deliciously warm from sleep. “Sounds like you’re still a believer, so what did he do to deserve the cold shoulder?”

Reed. Always pushing. Digging into my soul like a tweezer to discover what’s infecting me. “That’s between me and him.”

Reed hums, raking his fingers through my mess of hair. “I’ll leave it be. But just because you’re not talking to him doesn’t mean he’s stopped caring for you, Pet.” I don’t respond. Can’t respond, without delving into secrets I can’t handle. In the pause, his gaze burns into me, soft, hard, and hot all at once. The air grows heavy between us until I’m breathless. “And just because you push me away doesn’t mean I’ll do the same. But I’ll let you finish dressing.”

He unwinds from me, and his absence leaves me cold. I quietly retake my space, leaving our intimate moments in the dark where they belong. Once I dress, I see five texts from Livi, all asking about my not-date that turned into more of a date-date, considering how quickly he got me naked.

I text her back a quick, harmless lie.

Stayed the night. Nothing happened. I’ll text you later.

Liar! Call me!

I ignore her, gathering my things together. Reed stops me with a wide, gentle palm on my arm. “Do you want to get coffee?”

It’s an offer to end this on better terms, and I take it. “Sure.”

Tina is at the counter as we leave and, though we’re not holding hands, my cheeks heat. No doubt she’ll tell Becca and set the PTA moms’ tongues wagging.

“Now that your curiosity is sated—” I fiddle with my toffee latte at The Cornerhouse Cafe. “Where are you headed next? ”

Reed shakes his head. “It’s far from sated. Guess I’m staying in Swift River a little longer. I have yet to collect my side of the bargain, remember?”

I swallow hard at the memory of his rasp in my ear, my hands all over you . He lit a fire last night that still smoldered inside me. “You could claim it now and save yourself an extra hotel stay?”

“I love that offer,” Reed chuckles, “but I’ve got plans for you. When are you off work?”

I should lie, but the truth wins out. “I don’t have to work today.”

“What? Pet, we could be in bed right now. Cuddling naked, preferably.”

Sign me up , my body declares, but I shut it down. “I have a real life. I have to—”

“If you could do whatever you want today, what would you do?”

My answer is immediate, but I don’t want to share. I take a sip, stalling. “Laundry.”

Reed pins me with a look. “Petra.”

“It has to be done.”

“Petra.”

“Clean the kitchen. Visit Livi and the kids.”

He grins. “Done. Let’s go.”

“What?”

His raised eyebrow practically laughs at me. “We’re going to visit Livi. Should we bring a hostess gift? Maybe something extra special as thanks for the lace.”

My face goes up in flames. If Reed and Livi goad each other, I’ll be left in a pile of mortified ashes. “I’d go to the coast—if it was solely me. It’s almost an hour to the beach, but I’d spend all day there. Writing, breathing in the salt. I’d watch the sunset and come home.”

Reed’s eyes search mine. “Writing?”

Shit. “Like my diary.”

Reed frowns at me. “You’re not a great liar, which I appreciate. Why didn’t you mention this over dinner? What do you write? Is that what you were doing in LA? ”

Because you created your own company and I never published. “Mostly middle grade fiction. But I got sidetracked after…stuff. Ended up working for a nonprofit that advocates for patients with high medical bills. Then I moved back here.”

I wish I could read him as easily as he reads me, but his expression is one I don’t understand. “Was advocacy something you wanted to do, or did you fall into it?”

I shrug, hiding the knots in my stomach. “I had some intense hospital bills. I fought them and then…it felt right to use what I learned to help other people.”

Reed smiles, but his face is full of shadows as he reaches across the table to stroke his thumb over my knuckles. “You’re pretty incredible. Can I ask? Was it cancer?”

“No.” My fingers itch to touch my necklace. “A procedure that insurance didn’t want to cover.”

Reed frowns, but doesn’t push. “Didn’t want to stay in the advocacy field when you moved here?”

“Not a lot of options.”

“Portland is only an hour away—”

I can’t handle his pity. It’s my own fault I ended up back in Swift River. “Right now, I need to get back on my feet.”

Reed wants to say more, but he presses his lips together and takes in the mist dampening the sidewalk. “When’s your next day off?”

“Tuesday.”

“Okay.” He stands up from the table and offers his hand. “Day after next, we’re going to the coast, but today is my day. Do you want fresh clothes from your place?”

He’s making plans? I flounder while Reed tugs me up from the table. “What are we doing?”

“Something outside. Yes or no on the clothes?” he asks.

I’m so thrown by the suggestion he’ll still be here that I’m not listening as we walk. “Yes?”

“Great,” Reed says. “We’ll go there first. Can I convince you to pack an overnight bag? ”

That brings me to a screeching halt. “Hold on, you can’t come to the house. My parents will—”

“Already know? From Livi?”

I choke off my answer because he’s right. Livi can’t keep her mouth shut. I shift my panic mode into proactive. “If you’re serious, we need rules: One, I can’t handle my parents’ inquisition first thing in the morning. Two, no discussing my sex life or listening habits with my family. Three, you can’t become best friends with Livi.”

“Jealous?” he asks, grinning.

“Ha! I don’t want to die of embarrassment.”

Reed squeezes my hand. “Let’s do something, just you and me first. I won’t bring up our sex life, and Livi and I will be good—but not best—friends.”

My brain, however, gets caught on three words. “ Our sex life?”

He chuckles, and a heat pools in my belly. “I think it’s very intertwined.”

“Okay,” I squeak, considering how right he is.

Reed tugs me toward the car. “Perfect. Thought you’d fight me on that.”

“Fight you on what?” He opens the door for me and I sit, dazed, still processing our sex life. The rest of his conditions are hazy. “Wait!”

Reed shuts the door and climbs into the driver’s seat, smiling, light brown hair glistening with dew in the morning sun. “Already agreed, baby. Nothing you can do about it now.”

I glare, thoroughly confused as to what he roped me into. “How do you keep doing that?”

He tucks a wayward curl behind my ear, his smile fading. “Are you actually upset? I enjoy teasing you, but I don’t want to push. Show me the limit and I’ll stick to it.”

His fingers against my ear make me dizzy. He must notice, because he pulls his hand away, allowing me to focus. “Talking to my parents about sex is a limit.”

He nods solemnly. “Noted. ”

“With Livi—this is my family, Reed. You’ll leave and—” I’ll be left here. I can’t finish because there are ridiculous tears welling up. I desperately want to go back to LA, where I didn’t share a bathroom with my brother, or sleep in the same bed as when I was twelve. “I have consequences here, and you don’t.”

“I understand,” he says, cupping my jaw. “But I genuinely like you. When I leave, we can still be friends.”

My laugh is watery. “People don’t get naked and stay friends.”

“Why not?” he asks. “We could visit LA together—simply for the food—and regain some of your independence.”

God, I miss my independence the most. “LA has such good street food.”

“That’s why I said it. It’s going to be okay, Petronia.” His thumb traces the length of my jaw. “Just saying, we could avoid the be-all, end-all goodbye.”

I scrounge a smile, pushing away the waterworks. “We’ll see.”

“Do you want to end the game?” The concern on his face is bittersweet.

Truth is, I enjoy this game. I crave Reed’s hands on me and the way he makes me blush. I was a dead plant until he gave me some water and tugged me toward the sunlight. But I can’t find the right words. I shake my head.

He presses a soft kiss to my jaw and draws back. It blurs the lines between the intimacy of last night and the space between us this morning. “Me either,” he says. A confession. “Okay. My day. Are you hungry?”

I shrug, wiping my face to make sure no tears leaked out. “I had coffee cake.”

“Yeah, and? Are you hungry?”

“Yeah.”

“Me too,” he says with a laugh. “Let’s go to breakfast.”

At Imelda’s Diner, the post-church crowd watches us over their plates. That’s Diamante’s girl , I imagine them muttering . Tom will be so disappointed. No one says anything, though Big Billy’s overlarge, white mustache twitches when he glances our way .

“Petra, you alright?” Reed asks.

I dig deep for conviction. I don’t want the town, or my own doubt, to ruin this for me. I’m not comfortable going against the grain. Except for my move to LA, every choice I’ve made in life was to appease the people closest to me.

But Reed is mine. My choice. My joy. Screw the fallout. People already know, so I might as well make the most of it. I nudge his foot with mine, eliciting a smile and a nudge in response.

“Cheeky woman. I’m caught between the Swift Omelet and the Marionberry French Toast.”

“Get both and split?”

“You’re reading my mind,” Reed says, and my chest grows warm and fuzzy.

He’s not staying. Enjoy this for what it’s worth, and that’s it, I remind myself. And with Reed’s help, I avoid overthinking. When we talk, awkward pauses are laugh-worthy, jokes have the best punchlines, and anything too somber is quickly brightened. And then, of course, there’s all the sex talk.

“Porn?” Reed asks, very matter of fact.

I glance at Big Billy, cheeks hot. “Jesus, Reed, could you keep it down?”

“Sorry.” Reed leans forward, wiggling his eyebrows dramatically as he whispers, “Porn?”

I roll my eyes at his complete lack of subtlety. “Before the audios, yes. Now…not so much.”

Reed’s chest puffs like a proud rooster. “Doesn’t do it for you anymore?”

“Get over yourself!” I laugh.

“You never told me which scene is your favorite.”

I have many, all which fill a different need. I can’t go with one of the boyfriend-style ones, because the last thing I want is for Reed to assume I expect more. His most ridiculous comes to mind. “Santa’s Big Present. ”

Reed’s mouth drops open. “Seriously? I—you—” It’s the first time Reed flounders, and my giggles roll out of me as I slump down in my seat. “ Extra Cheeky !”

“Aren’t you proud of all your episodes?”

He rolls his eyes. “Both Santa and Pirate Captain were written by my friend Holly as punishment for bets that I lost. Pirate wasn’t your favorite, right?”

I break out into a fresh wave of giggles. “No! Your accent was terrible!”

“My accent was amazing. He had to sound drunk.”

I’m still laughing when his hand grasps the back of my neck and pulls me forward. My giggles fade in breathless anticipation, because I’ve fantasized about this type of forcefulness.

His eyes blaze, and I know his kiss is going to consume me.

But then his eyes clear and, with a gentle stroke of his thumb down my neck, he lets go. I deflate, anticipation replaced by disappointment. Is he avoiding kissing me because he knows it’s too intimate? Maybe he thinks I’ll get too attached, the way his stalker was. But Reed speaks before I can reassure him this doesn’t mean anything.

“Come on,” he says. “Let’s get out of here. But we need to detour at the hotel.”

I convince him to let me pick up the tab—after all, he’s living in hotels and I don’t pay rent. We’re in Reed’s room all of five minutes as he packs a backpack and insists I switch into one of his shirts. We stop by the counter on our way out and Reed asks Tina to extend his stay another night.

“Sure thing,” she says brightly, but between typing, Tina raises an eyebrow at me. Reed notices.

“Yes, actually,” he interrupts Tina’s pointed stare. “She is that good. Fucking phenomenal.”

I’m so surprised, my snorting laugh doesn’t come out until he’s guided me to his SUV just outside the front doors. “Reed!”

“What?” He opens the hatch, a smug smile plastered across his face. “Your hard limit is family. Is she family? ”

“No.”

“Then it’s within the rules. Are you mad?” I shake my head, still giggling, as he sets his bag in the hatch. Grinning, he pulls me into his arms and presses us tightly together. “She’s watching us.”

Reed’s hands smooth down my back until he has a firm handful of my ass, and squeezes. My knees buckle, and I muffle my moan against his shoulder. Maybe he’s putting on a show, but Tina is the last thing on my mind while I twine my arms greedily around him. His kisses down my neck send my head spinning. Reed excels at this—touching me in ways I didn’t know I wanted. His scruffy jaw against the tender skin of my collarbone makes me shiver.

“Cold, Pet?” I manage to shake my head. “You want more?” I nod, lips tingling in anticipation, but his kisses travel away from my mouth and across my collarbone. One of his hands brushes over my breast, and I can’t tell if the needy sound that comes out is mine, his, or both of ours. He’s hard against me, and it’s a relief to know he’s affected too.

He swears as he breaks away. “Better get moving or I’ll drag you inside and claim my bargain.”

I swallow my protests, climbing into the passenger seat before they can burst out.

Before I beg for Reed to do just that.