Chapter 31

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

C rosby was no longer a prisoner. He had been promoted back to part of the crew, but that didn’t mean anyone trusted him. Jerrik certainly didn’t, and for that reason, Crosby wasn’t allowed to join us fishing anymore.

A few of the others had warmed up to him, no doubt thanks to the two large sacks that he had stolen from Canne when we were in the midst of escaping. One was filled with flour for bread and the other with nuts and dried fruits. They were the items Bjorn had promised us, but we forgot to collect them in our haste to leave.

Together with the fresh produce we had swiped before the feast and the little fish we had caught these past few days, the food lasted a little over a week, but now, we were back to meals that wouldn’t fill even one-fifth of our stomachs.

“This is our best yet,” Jerrik exhaled in relief as we dropped the oars and patiently waited for them to reel us back onto The Serpent.

I joined Jerrik in his relief. “Six fish isn’t going to last long, but it’s the most we’ve seen in two weeks. I hope this means that we’re back in more habitable waters.”

“It sure looks like we are, and about time, too.”

Everyone was just as delighted as we were when we showed them the six fish we had been lucky to catch today. It was five more fish than we caught yesterday.

Gustav quickly fried two fish and left the other four for the coming days. Even though Jerrik and I were hopeful that things were starting to look up for us, we could not guarantee that we would be able to catch more fish tomorrow.

I wasn’t surprised to find Crosby sat among us. This was the way it had been since we had fled from Canne, the island of cannibals.

When everyone had gone to sleep that night, I poked Viktor awake and demanded that Crosby be upgraded from the bottom deck. To my surprise, he had already discussed it with the crew, and they all agreed that Crosby would be promoted to one of the crew as long as it was fine with me. However, he had warned me that one foot out of line would result in Crosby being back chained in the bottom deck quicker than he could beg for mercy.

Viktor and I had had some beautiful, mind-blowing, toe-curling sex before, but that night was extra special. Knowing that this gorgeous man, whom I was lucky enough to call my husband, could read my mind and know what I felt before I even mentioned it to him made me feel so fortunate. And tingly between my legs.

Crosby had been helping with cleaning and smaller tasks around the ship. No one yet trusted him with the more critical tasks, and I was sure that Jerrik would rather drown himself than allow Crosby back on the rowboat with us, but he had been earning his keep.

After dinner and ale, Crosby helped Gustav clean up and went to the second deck, where he was rooming with Hammond.

I would have also loved to join them on the second deck, but Viktor was on night duty. And if Viktor was on night duty, so was I, much to his dismay.

“You should go to bed, my siren,” Viktor murmured from behind me, bowing his head to kiss my neck.

“I’m not tired,” I lied, but I was betrayed by a big yawn not even a moment later.

“Not tired, huh?” Viktor laughed, and I couldn’t help but join in.

“Not as tired as I was that night we ran away from those wicked cannibals,” I chuckled, and even though the joke was lighthearted, Viktor let go of the wheel and curled one arm around my waist, saying so much to me with that simple action.

“I would never have let them eat you,” he whispered.

“Thanks for the reassurance, but after they chewed through your bones, I’m not sure if you would be able to stop them from doing the same to me.”

“We need to work on your positivity, my siren.” He playfully nipped my neck, making me giggle and squirm in his arms, but I froze when I felt something wet on my shoulder, seeping through the material of my dress.

“Viktor?” I whispered, my voice deathly quiet.

When I turned my head to glance over my shoulder, he nuzzled his face further into my neck. “Don’t look at me, Astrid. I don’t want you to see me like this.”

My lips parted in shock. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” he tried to deny, but his voice cracked so painfully that I felt like my heart was also breaking. “I’ll be fine. Just give me a moment to collect myself.”

“Why are you crying?” I asked in a small voice, turning around in his arms. Reaching up, I pried his hands away to cup his face.

This wasn’t the first time I had seen Viktor shed tears, but it was the first time I felt my heart cracking with each wet tear that rolled down his face.

“You need to tell me what’s wrong, Viktor, so that I can fix it,” I urged him quietly, struggling to keep my voice from cracking with emotion. “Did something happen? Are you hurt?”

“A lot of things have happened on this trip,” Viktor gulped and lowered his gaze, refusing to meet my eyes. “And I’ve nearly gotten you killed on more than one occasion.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You nearly drowned. Then you nearly starved to death, and then after that, you were nearly eaten alive by cannibals. All of those things are my fault. If it weren’t for me, you never would have been in danger like that,” he sniffled and wiped away the tears before they could fall. When he finally met my eyes, his face was hard, and his expression was serious. “I don’t want you to see me like this, my siren. Please go to bed. I’ll see you in the morning.”

If my husband thought it was that easy to get rid of me, he had another thing coming.

I pinned him with a hard stare. “Are you my husband or not?”

“What kind of question is that?”

“Answer my question,” I demanded.

“Of course, I’m your husband!”

“Then why are you trying to hide your pain from me?” I whispered, blinking back tears of my own. “Don’t you trust me to protect you? To care for you?”

“What? Of course I do, Astrid!” Viktor gaped at me, looking offended. “I don’t want you to ever think like that.” He shook his head and reached for me, pulling me into his arms and wounding them tight around me, leaving no room for escape. Not that I would ever dream about leaving Viktor’s arms.

“I don’t ever want you to feel like you have to hide your feelings from me,” I mumbled into his chest, holding him just as tight as he was holding me. “You can tell me anything. You know that, right?”

“I know, I know,” Viktor sighed and nodded, still looking a little defeated. “I know that, but I feel like all I’ve done is fail you lately.” It hurt me to hear him talk like this, but I knew he needed to get all this off his chest.

“I haven’t been able to sleep since we returned from Canne,” Viktor admitted, whispering into my hair as he held me like I was the most precious cargo on this ship. “Every single night, I lay awake holding you. I wanted you with me because I thought I could keep you safe, and I couldn’t imagine spending months at sea without you. I knew the distance and yearning would kill me, and I still stand by that, but everything has been going wrong lately. You’ve been in danger over and over again, and I’ve been helpless to save you. I can’t fall asleep at night knowing how I’ve failed you, and I’ll keep failing you if I don’t change my ways.”

“I don’t want you to change your ways, pirate. You’re absolutely perfect the way you are. I love you the way you are.” I pulled back slightly to stare up at him. When he refused to meet my eyes, I cupped his face and peppered kisses all over his face until he looked at me. “Did you hear me, Viktor? I love you. More than a person can ever love somebody, and I love you so much for bringing me with you. I don’t know how I would have gotten this far without you, having to miss you every day. Things have been crazy lately, but we’ve all been in danger.” I nuzzled the tip of my nose against his. “When you got onto the rowboat with Jerrik to save Crosby, I wanted nothing more than to scream for you to come back. I didn’t want the cannibals to eat Crosby, but I didn’t want it enough to risk you, Viktor. I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you. I truly wouldn’t be able to live without you, so please don’t put yourself in that position again.”

Now, I was crying.

“I wouldn’t be able to live without you either, my siren,” Viktor whispered, inching his mouth closer to mine, brushing a soft kiss against my lips.

“Then it seems like we’re at an impasse,” I smiled against his lips. “You keep worrying about me, and I’ll keep worrying about you, okay, pirate? Because not worrying about each other is impossible, but I need you to sleep at night, okay? Please do it for me. I need to know you’re okay.”

“I promise I’ll try,” he whispered, and his lips turned up slightly at the corners when I gave him a pointed look. “For you, I’ll try anything, my siren.”

“And I don’t want you to hide your feelings from me anymore, okay? I’m your wife. You’re supposed to tell me these things. You’re supposed to confide in me so we can share the burden. We’re a team, remember?”

“I’m so grateful you’re my wife, Astrid,” he groaned and pressed his mouth to mine again, this kiss harder and more passionate than before. “And I promise not to bottle my feelings anymore.”

“That’s all I can ask for,” I sighed wistfully against his mouth. “I love you, Viktor.”

“And I love you, Astrid. More than you can imagine. Never forget that.”

“I wouldn’t ever dream of it,” I smiled, turning my head to rest against his chest, seeking the comfort that only my husband could provide.

Viktor kept his foot on the button the whole time, so we continued gliding through the water. His arms were tight around me, and the blanket he had wrapped around us was warm. Before I knew it, I found myself drifting off to sleep.

I didn’t know how long I was out, but some time later, Viktor shook me awake with an alarmed look.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” I asked, gasping as I surged awake.

“The King’s Lost Island...Treasure Island,” Viktor whispered into the darkness, turning me around to stare into the distance.