Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

By late afternoon, Marlowe not only felt completely comfortable with Kelsey, Libby, and Judy, but she now knew who Nick was and all that Alex and Kelsey had lived through during that horror-filled night in the Pacific Northwest years ago. She also knew Libby'd survived being buried alive, and that Mark Houston was the man who'd found her. Even Judy had lived through a nightmare, after a horrendous freeway accident left Harley missing for days, with a traumatic brain injury that made him forget her. They hadn't had their boys then, but Marlowe could relate to being forgotten. That was the story of her life, and knowing these women better gave her a new perspective.

Persia and China were running late, and Marlowe realized her new friends weren't the shallow divas she'd thought. If anything, they were like her, each lucky to be alive. Only they didn't feel sorry for themselves. They were each resilient and strong. That was what she had in common with these ladies. They might look like they'd just stepped off high-fashion runways in Paris or New York, but they were scarred and battered, too. They were brave. Well then, Marlowe could be brave and stop whining, too.

"And then I find out that Sergeant Knicks " —Judy made exaggerated air quotes— "who I thought was a female soldier, was actually a big, black lab. Do you believe that? Her name's spelled N-Y-X, not K-N-I-C-K-S like the basketball team. Darn him. Alex tricked me, the jerk, and then he laughed in my face when he drove me to the airport to pick up a… a dog crate." Judy leaned into Marlowe when she said that.

Marlowe laughed.

"Yes, but Nyx was Harley's military working dog," Kelsey added. "He needed her back in his life and you made that happen. How is Nyx anyway?"

Judy crossed her arms and humphed. "Oh, she's fine, but until that day, I didn't think Alex knew how to tease. He made me look stupid, but" —she shrugged— "now I know he loves Harley as much as I do."

"He does," Kelsey murmured. "He loves all his agents, their families, and even their dogs."

Despite Judy's sarcastic, over-exaggerated delivery, it was easy to see how each of these women loved their men, and no wonder. Alex, Mark, and Harley had each saved their wives' lives in one way or another. Kelsey had two men to thank for her being there today. Alex for finding her after her ex-husband tried to kill her—after he'd already murdered her tiny baby boys, the asshole. Then Harley, when a year later, Alex and Kelsey were nearly killed by her ex—again—and his survivalist buddies from Montana. Harley'd rescued Alex first that time. He'd been near death's door, beaten so bad. Then Harley went into the woods after Kelsey, who'd been dragged off by her ex and his buddies. By the time Harley caught up with them and put them in the ground, she'd been in rough shape. She'd lived through one nightmare after another that year. Alex hadn't helped matters when he'd thought he was dying and yelled at her to leave him. To just go. But once again, Harley brought the lovers back together.

As far as the Stewarts being rich, snooty, and full of themselves, this house was just a stone house that Kelsey and Alex had turned it into a home. Looks were deceiving, and Marlowe was feeling pleasantly mellow, especially with Bradley asleep on her lap. She tipped forward and breathed a kiss into his hair. For the first time in her life, she felt like she belonged. These pretty women, the ones she'd tried so hard to alienate, kept being kind and thoughtful, most of all, honest.

Yes, they'd all been through their own versions of hell, and Marlowe couldn't begin to imagine how terrifying it must've been for Libby to have been buried alive. In a concrete planter. In Wisconsin. In autumn. Winters there were brutal, and early fall couldn't've been much warmer. Marlowe shivered at the thought of being trapped in that dark, cold cave again.

"So…" Kelsey murmured. "It's late, girls, and I have an extra guest room that's just down the hall. Marlowe, would you mind staying with me until Alex gets back?"

"You know?" Marlowe asked, surprised he'd told his wife about the mission. "I mean, err, he told you where he was going?"

Kelsey leaned forward, her elbows on her knees. "Not exactly. My husband has a tendency to run toward trouble while others run from it, so I suspect he's doing something dangerous."

"As do his men," Libby confirmed. "You sound like you know more than we do, Marlowe. Do you?"

"Yeah, what's up, girlfriend?" Judy asked.

"No, err, yes. Okay, yes. But it's… it's classified." Marlowe had no idea if the mission was classified or not, but no way would she break Asher's confidence. He'd had the nerve to stand up to his boss. She couldn't let him down. "I was supposed to go with them," she offered lamely, "but here I am, sitting around doing nothing while they're off saving the world—"

"You aren't doing nothing," Judy snapped. "We all signed up for this when we married our guys, and maybe that's why you don't get it. You don't have a vested interest in these guys coming back safely, or maybe you just don't care about them as much as we do. You don't have anyone to lose. But understand this" —Judy gestured angrily toward the other women— "this is what us wives do when our men leave. We sit with each other, we stand by each other, and we keep watch together, in the darkest nights when waiting alone gets too hard, Marlowe. While they're off saving the world, as you put it, we save each other here at home. That's every bit as important to them as their missions are to the world. We can't do what they do, and God knows, I wouldn't want to. But someone has to, and those someones are the men we love."

Marlowe's mouth was dry by the end of Judy's rant. She felt like she'd been slapped. Sure, she wished Asher hadn't left like he did, and yes, okay, she missed him not being with her when she woke up this morning. But he hadn't even said goodbye. He'd just snuck away with his friends.

Only now…

It wasn't like he was out joyriding with his buddies. He'd left her behind, true, but he'd done that to protect her. Maybe because of that hug in Harley's barn? The hug she'd turned into an awkward joke, when all he'd wanted was to get closer to her?

Man, she was a troll. He'd just revealed his secret, that he had nightmares. That he needed a service dog. Big, brave Asher Downey, the courageous warrior who'd gone into hell to save her worthless life, had confided his deepest, darkest secret to her. But she'd shut him down, and somehow, Judy knew.

Marlowe had no idea what to say, or how to feel about Judy's uncomfortable accusations. As usual, Kelsey saved the day. Resting a hand on Marlowe's kneecap, she stage-whispered, "And as you can tell, some of us are still recovering from a bit of our own PTSD."

"And one of us," Libby added slyly, "might not be married, but she masks her fear for the guy she cares about by acting offended because he left without her. She's really afraid for him, because she knows how bad things can be in that part of the world. She knows she might never see him again. That's a frightening thought, huh, Marlowe?"

Judy's eyes turned into two thin slits of intense emerald green scrutiny, reminding Marlowe how Asher seemed to see right through her, too. Darn it, Libby might be right.

Marlowe bowed her head, hiding from Judy's fierce gaze. "I don't know what you're talking about."

But she did know, and Libby was right. Marlowe did care for Asher. She liked being with him, and she especially liked how he smelled, and the way his sexy green eyes lit up when he'd first seen her that morning in Germany. She liked the funny way her body hummed when he came into view, and she was dying to run her fingers through his hair. And that stupid hug? That was her being mean and pushing him away because… Well, because if the two people who should've loved her the most shoved her away like she was nothing, why would Asher be any different? People were mean and thoughtless and selfish. Only…

Right then, Asher was far from home, risking his life in a hostile country, doing what she wanted to be doing. Fighting for the helpless and the vulnerable, instead of sitting around complaining, whining, and talking about how someone else ought to do something about it. Asher was the reason she was alive today, but she'd spurned him. Why?

"I bet you didn't know Asher nearly died in Somalia when he was still Army," Kelsey whispered.

Marlowe turned to study Alex's wife. There were tiny scars along her jaw, and she'd shown Marlowe the wicked, red scar along the side of her head where a sniper's bullet had nearly killed her last fall. These women were tougher than she'd thought. They weren't wealthy talkers; they were earnest doers. And most of that doing was done out of the goodness of their hearts. They weren't getting rich off their sacrifices. Kelsey ran a safe place for homeless teenagers in Washington, D.C., Judy was a registered nurse, and Libby was a doctor. They were hardworking mothers, as well as businesswomen and faithful wives.

"I didn't know he was in Somalia," Marlowe replied softly.

"It's his story to tell, and I shouldn't have said anything. One of these days, he'll share it with you, but…" Kelsey shrugged. "Sometimes the truth is hard to see because we're too close to it, sweetheart. I never knew how strong I was until Alex showed me how to be brave."

"I'm not brave. I'm just mean," Judy declared proudly.

Libby leaned into Judy, nearly pushing her over. "You're just like Marlowe. You're only mean because you have to be. I'll bet Harley has never once said you're mean."

Judy hmphed. "He'd better not if he knows what's good for him."

Everyone laughed.

"I am worried about those guys. All of them," Marlowe admitted.

"But she only has eyes for Asher. Marlowe and Asher, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G," Libby sing-songed.

Marlowe nodded, meeting Libby's sparkling blue. "I do like him."

"We know," Judy quipped. "Now give me that beanie."

Marlowe slapped her free hand firmly over the beanie Asher gave her. "Why?"

"Judy," Kelsey warned.

"Nope. It goes," Judy declared, holding her hand out as if she totally expected Marlowe to obey. "It's part of the mask. It has to go. Hand it over, sister."

"When she's ready to let it go, she will," Kelsey said firmly.

Judy shook her head. "That's the thing." She looked right into Marlowe's soul. "You're ready, aren't you?"

Marlowe bit her bottom lip, unsure and afraid; trembling for nothing, darn it. She was brave. She didn't need a beanie to prove it, because she didn't care what anyone thought of her. Not anyone. Except Asher. "Asher gave it to me."

Kelsey's brown eyes brimmed with what Marlowe recognized now as, not love, but understanding. And if Kelsey believed in her... Marlowe closed her eyes, clenched her teeth, and dragged the beanie off.

"There," she snapped at Judy. "Are you happy now? I'm bald. Ugly. I had lice, damn it, so I shaved my head. I did what I had to do. I'm not rich and I'll never be as beautiful as any of you." She hadn't intended to sound vindictive, but what was so wrong about a woman wearing a beanie? What was beauty anyway? Skin deep, that was all. Some of the world's prettiest people were pigs at heart and some Taliban soldiers were handsome. But none had a problem punching a woman in the face.

"I'm sorry," Judy said. There were tears in her eyes, and Libby was sniffling, but it was Kelsey who whispered, "We've got your six, little girl. You're not alone now, and you'll never be alone again."

Something cracked open in her chest. It hurt. "It's too hard. I can't do this."

"You already did, sweetheart," Kelsey told her firmly. "The TEAM is a family, and you belong to us now. You are finally home. Let it out. We're here, and we already love you."

"I second the motion," Judy whispered hoarsely.

Marlowe looked at them through tears. Libby was hugging Judy. Everyone was crying. Well, except for Grandpa Stewart. He was still in his wheelchair, sound asleep, and snoring.

"Here, here," Libby murmured. "Motion approved. You're stuck with us, Marlowe."