27. Sunday

TWENTY-SEVEN

"What do you think of Ash?" I ask my son as we sit on the bench at the park, enjoying the nice day. We've been so busy that we haven't gotten to hang out like this lately. I miss it. I miss him being little and wanting nothing but to be attached to my hip every hour of the day. I don't think I fully appreciated it then. I look at the young man sitting next to me, with his voice changing, his two strands of facial hair he's so proud of, and his sketchbook, and I can't help but be filled with a bit of sadness at how fast it all went by.

"In what way?" Wade's only mildly paying attention to me. I can tell by his furrowed brow and his rapid movements over the page.

"In any way." I shrug, taking a sip of my milkshake. "You guys hang out a lot. I'm just curious what you think about him." Memories of my post-op recovery, when he opened up to Ash about not needing a dad, fill my head, and it hurts my heart. I did my best to be both mom and dad for him. I would kiss the boo-boos and teach him to bait a hook. I baked his birthday cakes, and I changed his bike chains. I did all I could, and he never complained. Even when I was with Josh, and he refused to acknowledge Wade, he never acted as if it bothered him because he had me. But when he thought I was asleep in the hospital, the things he said made me realize that maybe I hadn't been the only one trying to put on a brave face in our little family.

"I like him. He's fun, and he can draw. He likes to do stuff with me, and he's nice to you and makes you happy." I furrow my brow.

"Makes me happy?" I watch Wade nod.

"You are always smiling around him, and I hear you guys on the phone at night watching TV sometimes. Plus, he brings you Starbursts, and he's helping with the dance studio."

"What if…" I take another sip of my shake, trying to find some nerve. "What if I went on a date with him?" Wade's fast movements over his page stop, but he doesn't look up. I'm about to tell him not to worry about it, that I was just thinking out loud, when he looks up at me and smirks.

"I think that would be awesome, mom. And I think Ash and you would have a lot of fun."

I chew on my thumbnail nervously. "Maybe," I mutter before looking away.

Ren: What year is it? Fucking ask him yourself!

Janie: You know she won't *chicken emoji* *poop emoji*

Me: You all are assholes.

I shakemy head as I walk to my dresser and pull out a pair of pajama shorts and a gray tank top before grabbing a comb and returning to my bed, where I had tossed my phone.

Ren: Assholes? Probably. But we are correct.

Stevie: I love you, Sunday, but I agree, just ask him out. Ash has horrible anxiety. If you wait on him, it might never happen.

Indy: Want me to ask him? He's coming to pick me up tomorrow.

My heart drops at her text. I completely forgot Indy was in the text thread because, well, I'm an idiot and she's been out of it for almost a week now while recovering from her relapse.

Me: NO! DO NOT ASK HIM!

Janie: Ohhhhhh… Do it! Do it!

Ren: Easy, tiger, Sunday might lose her shit and not realize you are kidding.

Indy: I mean, I have no car in this race. I will gladly tell him.

Me: HI! IT'S ME, NOT GIVING CONSENT TO THAT!!

Janie: Shhh… we won't do it. But you should march that perky ass over to his door and ask him out.

Ren: You do have a nice ass

Stevie: And you didn't hear it from me, but Ash has a thing for your nipple piercings.

Me: Wait… WHAT

Indy: Oh yeah, it's creepy as shit the number of times he's come back to compliment Stevie on those piercings.

Stevie: lol yeah, I asked how he was so familiar with them, and he turned red before saying he just ‘has an eye for good work'

Me: Well… I must go somewhere and die now.

Janie: THIS IS YOUR IN! Go over there shirtless!

Janie: No, that will end in sex. That's not a bad thing, but we want a date.

Janie: OH! Go over and say that the ball fell off! Tell him you need help putting it back on!!

Me: Good night, ladies…

I turn our group chat on do not disturb while laughing to myself, thinking about what would happen if I walked over to Ash's, saying my piercing needed assistance. I bite down on my lip, knowing precisely where that would lead, but I can't. That isn't what I want from him, well… not entirely.

But what if he says no? What if I'm reminded that he doesn't want to date me again? That this is just the occasional hook up with the hot neighbor that my son is crazy about. That we both are crazy about—if I'm being completely honest.

"Screw it," I mutter and climb to the head of my bed and knock on the wall. It only takes a second before I get the knock knock in return. I get out of bed and walk through the apartment, making sure to stay quiet to not wake Alice or Wade up. I walk to Ash's door and go to knock, but then shrug and just open the door. I remember him scolding me once about keeping my door unlocked, yet his is always unlocked if he's home. Though he is over six feet and covered in tattoos and muscles, so I guess he may be a little less concerned. I walk through his apartment, down the hall, and open his door.

"FFFUCK!" he shrieks and covers his bare chest with a pillow. I snort while placing a hand on my hip.

"Is that pillow supposed to protect you?"

"We'll see if you have that attitude when I hurl it at your big head," He grumbles, rubbing his chest.

"Well, start locking your door. What if a crazy person just waltzes in here?"

"One just did!" he huffs while standing up. "Now, may I ask why you felt the need to shave ten years off my life?"

I take a deep breath while trying to summon all my courage. "Right, ummm… You want to date me." He raises a brow and looks around.

"Is that so?" he chuckles, and I smack my head.

"No! I mean, do you want to go on a date with me?" I watch his smile fall slightly, and my confidence falls along with it. Not that I had much to begin with. Fuck, he's going to reject me. He's really going to look me in the eye againand—–

"Okay." I stare at him in stunned silence. Am I hearing things?

"What?" I ask tentatively.

He gives me a breathy laugh. "I said, okay. But I'm not a cheap date, sunshine. I expect to be wined and dined. I'm all about being doted on." He gives me a wink that causes butterflies in my tummy to erupt.

"So, what were you thinking?" he asks, and I shift uncomfortably.

"Honestly? That you would say no, and I would have to figure out how to disappear and somehow still allow Wade to come around."

His brows furrow together. "I meant, where would you like to go on the date… but good to know."

"Oh my god," I groan and hide my face in my hands. "Is this how men feel when they ask girls out?" He chuckles, and I feel him move closer.

"Probably something similar." His warm arms wrap around me, and I let out a sigh. "So, is that the only reason you came over?" I stare up at him as he gives me a suggestive smirk.

"You're a pig."

"Yet here you are, begging to court me. Trying to make me a proper lady and such." I reach up and smack his forehead.

"Ain't nothing proper about you, charming." His chuckle is a low rumble as he nuzzles into my neck. I don't want to leave, but I also know that staying will only lead to sex, and I need to know if there is more to us than that.

"I should go before Wade wakes up." I can see the disappointment flash across his face, but he smiles and kisses the top of my head.

"Good night, sunshine."

"Night, charming."