22. Sunday

TWENTY-TWO

Iflop onto my bed and let out a long yawn. I hate how quiet the apartment is. Wade is staying with Ren and Atlas again tonight because I have surgery tomorrow to have the VNS device removed. It probably would've been easier to ask Ash or Indy if they could watch him tonight, but I didn't want to ask Ash after his panic attack yesterday.

Grabbing my remote, I turn on the television when I hear a familiar knock on my wall. My heart rate quickens and a smile pulls at my face. I hate it. I"m about to knock back, as per our ritual, to signal that one of us is about to text. But as I'm about to knock back, there's another thud and another… Oh god, is he?

Heat rushes to my face as I jump off my bed and storm out of my room, fueled by the aggravation rushing through me. How dare he? He knows my bed is rightthere. He doesn't want me, fine. He can fuck whoever he wants, but he doesn't have to do it right next to my fucking bed, does he?

I walk across the hall and try his apartment door without bothering to knock. When I enter, I startle Indy, who's watching TV on the couch.

"Sun–"

"No time," I state as I walk past her and down the hall. I reach Ash's closed door and smack on it several times.

"Hey!" I yell. "You wanna continue to try to beat the record on one-night stands with the girls you pick up at Hel's? Go for it, but move your fucking bed!" I smack the door again, my body shaking with adrenaline, and I nearly run when the door swings open, and a sweaty and shirtless Ash stands in the doorway. At least he put his pants on. I notice his breathing is labored, and a smirk forms on his face.

"You know, sunshine," he says with a breathy laugh. "I could be gracious and not make you feel like a dick," he shrugs. "But I'm in a shit mood today, so I'm going to make it your problem." Ash backs away, opening his door fully. I look inside and notice he's the only person in there. At the foot of his bed sits his weights and an exercise mat.

"Oh." Fuck, this won't end well. "Well, my bad," I state as I turn to walk away before my cheeks get any redder.

"My bad?" He laughs. "You just barged in here and said all that shit, and your response is, ‘my bad'? I think you owe me better than that. Don't I have feelings? Am I not a human?"

"Fine," I state as I look up at him. "I'm sorry," I mutter through gritted teeth. "Happy?" Ash taps a finger to his chin.

"I think you could do better," he purrs in a low tone, which I can feel in my core. I let out a shaky breath to try to get my bearings. When did he get so close? When did I back up against the wall? "Come on, sunshine," he teases. "You wounded me."

"Yeah, you look super affected." I go to push him away, but he grabs my wrist and pins it against the wall over my head. "Hey!" I cry out in surprise and shove him with my other arm, only for it to end in the same fate. He lowers his head and looks me in the eye.

"Tell me, sunshine," he whispers in that same purr. "What if I was with someone else?" I glare at him as I feel the jealousy coming back.

"That's your business. Fuck whoever you want. But I have surgery in the morning and need sleep, so I need to go," I snap. His eyes widen and I feel his hands loosen on my wrists. I take the opportunity to shove him so I can get some space. He moves, though I think it's more so because he wants to, not because I have any real effect.

"You're having surgery tomorrow?" he asks, his voice full of worry.

"Yeah," I say, trying to get past the whiplash of emotions. "It's minor. They're just removing the VNS here." I point to the light scar near my armpit.

"Why didn't you say anything? Where's Wade? Do you need me to hang out with him?" Oh… my fucking heart. He doesn't want you like that Sunday. Stop it.

I give him a weak smile and shake my head. "Thanks, but he's at Ren and At's place. I didn't want to bother you."

"It wouldn't have been a bother," he says quietly, almost as if he's hurt or offended.

"Well, I knew Ren would be home tomorrow. I figured with tomorrow being Friday, you would have Hel's, and then, you know, whatever." It's getting too fucking warm in here. I need to leave, like now.

"Sunshine," Ash calls before I can leave his room. I turn around to face him.

"Here." He grabs my hand and puts a little baggy of orange Starbursts in it before I can jerk it away.

"What is this?" I laugh lightly as he shrugs.

"I never paid you the fee for being my date." He winks before patting my shoulder, and I give him a small smile.

"Well, thanks. At least I have something to look forward to eating once I get home."

"And Sunday? For what it's worth, you're the only girl I've been with that I've tattooed." I feel a blush heating up my face.

"Oh? Not from what I saw the other day." Shit, way to go, big mouth. I see his smirk grow wider as he raises a brow.

"You stalking me, sunshine? You didn't mention this before."

"Shut up. I was with Luca the day I got attacked and saw you outside with a woman." He thinks for a moment before nodding his head.

"Well, sweetheart. That was Mari, Neil's daughter. She's in town to see Neil and Mom. And to get a tattoo from Fox. Also, you would have better luck getting her into bed than I would." I'm now most definitely resembling a tomato.

"I'm just going to go die now." I head out the door again. "Have a good night, charming. Sorry again for being an asshole."

Ash leans against the door frame and smirks. "I'll take you as an asshole as long as I get you." He winks before walking back into his room. "Have a good night, pretty girl. Give me a knock when you're back in bed." I stare at him as he goes to his bed and pulls it from against the wall before continuing his workout.

I head out into the hallway in almost a daze.

"Sunday?" Indy's small voice grabs my attention.

"Hm?" I barely acknowledge her while walking to the front door.

"Is everything alright?" No. Everything isn't alright. Everything is shit. And the only thing I want is for Ash to like me.

"Yeah," I say quickly. "Just tired. I'll talk to you later."

Once I'm back in my apartment, I stare down at the bag as I set it on the counter. It's just a clear sandwich bag tied with a red piece of yarn.

"You know, sunshine, I kind of feel like this is destiny. Like the red string of fate."

I sigh and look up at the ceiling. "Why? Fucking why?" There"s a knock on my wall, followed by my phone chiming.

Charming: You know, you look really pretty when you're jealous.

Me: Fuck off. I'm not jealous. We're friends, we can fuck whoever, just keep the headboard away from the wall.

Charming: Yeah, that's not going to work.

Me: Why?

Charming: Because if I hear a man over there with you, I'm coming in there and beating his face in.

Me: Oh, and that's supposed to be fair? You go out and my vag is out of service?

Charming: Haven't been out. Don't plan to.

Me: Why?

Charming: Other priorities. Now go to sleep. Good night, sunshine.

Me: Night, charming.

I set my phone on the charger while letting his words sink in. Priorities? He doesn't plan to go out because of priorities. Since when? And what are his priorities?

Snuggling into my pillow, I exhale a long sigh. There's a part of me that hopes beyond hope that maybe I might be at least part of those priorities.