6. Jillian

6

JILLIAN

J illian walked down Park Avenue, soaking in the sights of the little town preparing for the holidays.

The Victorian dollhouse in the real estate office window was set on a bed of snow made from cotton batting. And the owner of Locally Made was setting Christmas mugs in the front display of the shop. Brad had explained once that most of the pottery in the shop was made with clay from a nearby river, and Jillian thought it was a neat idea that even the cup for your morning coffee could literally be a part of the town.

In the cute shopping bag she carried was a gift that she’d already picked up for Josie and was pretty happy about. Josie was at a tough age, where it was so easy for little kids toys to seem too babyish for her, or the things meant for teens too mature. Jillian had purchased a few smaller gifts in the city. And she had been on the fence about a few possibilities for a larger present, but as soon as she’d explained what she wanted to Lily over at the toy store, the woman had known instantly that a set of beautiful wooden blocks complete with turret pieces, bridges, and other details would be perfect for Josie. And Jillian agreed that any kid would love to build castles and villages, and the pieces in the set would be safe for the younger cousins she would be playing with now on the homestead.

With the gift sorted, Jillian just wanted to grab a few things from the grocery store before heading over to the café for coffee with Brad’s mom and her friends. Josie normally liked a snack of cheese and crackers with fruit after school, and Jillian wanted to make the cottage feel as much like home as possible for her right now.

“Hey there, how can I help you?” a young woman with a tag that said Lucy asked as she walked into the welcome warmth of the big shop.

“Oh, I’m just wanting cheese and crackers and fruit,” Jillian told her. “Nothing fancy. I think I’m okay on my own.”

“We have a new cheddar in from a local dairy farm that’s amazing ,” Lucy said happily. “They let the staff do a taste test, and we all ended up buying some to take home.”

“That sounds great,” Jillian said.

Lucy set off to the dairy aisle and Jillian followed, nearly bumping into the other woman when she stopped suddenly.

“Oh, my word,” Lucy whispered, her eyes on the tables at the front window.

“What’s wrong?” Jillian asked.

“Sorry,” Lucy said. “I’m not usually one to gossip. It’s just that the lady in the window there, Amanda, she had a thing for that guy all through high school, but he was dating another girl. And now, to see them together… Well, it’s sort of a Christmas miracle, isn’t it?”

Jillian looked to see who Lucy was talking about and suddenly it felt like her heart was going to stop beating.

Brad was sitting at a little table in the front window. And he was leaning in, listening to whatever the pretty blonde lady was whispering to him as if it were the most interesting thing he had ever heard.

Somehow, Jillian managed to tear her eyes away and force a smile.

“That’s really sweet,” she said to Lucy, who smiled and nodded approvingly.

“Sometimes a little patience pays off,” Lucy said, heading for the dairy aisle again. “It did for me. I married the guy I crushed on forever.”

“That’s really wonderful,” Jillian said, meaning it, even as her own heart broke. “When the time is right, it’s right.”

“That’s what I used to tell myself about Ashton,” Lucy said dreamily. “But I didn’t really believe it. The universe has a way of delivering miracles though.”

Her gaze slid back to the café tables, but Jillian kept her own eyes forward.

She would find a way to be happy for Brad. He deserved to find love, even if it wasn’t with her. She wanted that for him, and for Josie too.

But she didn’t exactly want to watch it happening.

Ten minutes later, Jillian was relieved but still heavy with sadness as she escaped the store without Brad spotting her, and headed down the sidewalk in the direction of Jolly Beans , the little café by the train station at the corner of Park and Ambler.

How am I supposed to go hang out with his mom and her friends? What if they’re talking about this too?

But she thought about the advice she would give to Josie if she ever found herself in this situation one day. And she knew the advice would be to stop licking her wounds and focus on others. Annabelle and her friends would probably have plenty of stories to share with a fresh audience, and that would be a welcome distraction from her pain.

She pushed open the door to the café, sending the little bells on top of it jingling, and inhaling the rich, welcome scent of fresh coffee and something delicious baking.

Annabelle was at a nice big table in the window of the café. She and her friends all seemed to have notebooks and legal pads out, as if they were trying to solve a mystery or something.

“Hello, dear,” Annabelle called out as Jillian approached. “Have a seat. We already ordered for you.”

“Oh,” Jillian said, taking the open chair next to Annabelle. “Wow, thank you.”

“We’re all having gingerbread lattes and a slice of Pete’s famous cranberry bread,” the lady on her other side said firmly. “There’s nothing better on the menu, and those are only around for the holidays.”

“It sounds amazing,” Jillian said .

“I told you,” Annabelle said to her friends. “She’s a keeper. Jillian, meet Betty Ann, Shirley, and Ginny.”

“Nice to meet you all,” Jillian said, trying to commit their names to memory.

“Annabelle says you’re a book lover,” the lady beside her said.

“Yes, Betty Ann,” Jillian said. “I do love books.”

“And you don’t know anything about antiques?” Betty Ann asked.

“No,” Jillian said, shaking her head and wondering what in the world was going on.

“You’re right then, Annabelle,” Betty Ann said. “She’s all yours, if she’s willing.”

“We’re planning the Winter Wonderland celebration,” Annabelle explained. “It happens the week between Christmas and New Year’s, and everyone loves it. It’s the perfect way to avoid the post-Christmas blues.”

“That sounds really nice,” Jillian said. “But I’m surprised you can find the time, with Emma’s wedding coming up so soon.”

Brad’s sister, Emma, was set to be married to the wealthy rancher who’d caused such a stir last year by buying up so much of the farmland around Trinity Falls. The whole family was very excited and everyone was busy preparing for the ceremony.

“Oh, I’m helping some with the dresses,” Annabelle admitted. “But Emma and her bridesmaids are working out all the details.”

“Don’t let her fool you,” Shirley chimed in. “By helping out some , she means organizing all the food and cooking most of it. ”

From all Jillian knew about Brad’s mother, that tracked perfectly.

“Let’s not get sidetracked, ladies,” Annabelle continued, but there was a clear note of pride in her voice. “Every year, each of us heads up a group of volunteers to make the Winter Wonderland happen. Betty Ann handles the community garage sale, Shirley coordinates the food offerings, and Ginny handles the unexpected things.”

“Like if someone doesn’t show up for another task,” Ginny explained with a gentle smile. “Or if someone faints or loses their tickets, or a child needs to win something and hasn’t yet.”

“You make sure all the kids get to win something?” Jillian asked, impressed.

“The little ones, yes,” Betty Ann said firmly. “No child should go home empty-handed.”

“My group has been collecting book donations,” Annabelle said. “I was hoping you might volunteer as part of the team that goes through them to make sure they’re ready for sale. We also pull out anything that might be good to donate to the children’s section at the library, and that goes on a separate table.”

“I’d be glad to,” Jillian said, feeling excited about the prospect of volunteering with a team. “Thanks so much for thinking of me.”

“Oh, I do like her,” Betty Ann said, patting Jillian’s arm.

Jillian felt a burst of warmth in her chest. Maybe her life was a little up in the air, and maybe her heart felt like it was sinking into the floor. But having a worthy purpose and a community around her, even for a little while, was just what she needed.

The next hour passed quickly as she listened to the ladies make their plans and laugh about past festivals. Just a short amount of time with them allowed her to see not just how well the Winter Wonderland was run, but also to hear references to so many other events in town that this group had a hand in.

She was so drawn in that she didn’t even notice Brad’s arrival until Betty Ann tapped her hand.

“Hey there,” he said, his deep voice touching her heart as it always did when he spoke gently like this. “I was heading over to pick up Josie, and I saw you in the window. I wondered if you might like to join me.”

“Yes,” she said right away. “I mean, unless you all need me to stick around?”

“No, no, dear,” Annabelle said right away. “Josie will want to tell you all about her day.”

“Thank you,” Jillian told her. “This was really amazing. I can’t wait to lend a hand. I’m sure we have some books to donate. We really didn’t have time to sort through all our things.”

“You can bring them over to the community center,” Betty Ann told her. “And if you have children’s books, those can go over to Miss Caroline at the library. We let her pick through everything first since her budget is limited over there.”

Caroline was married to Brad’s brother, Logan. They lived on the homestead too, but all the way on the opposite side. Josie had stayed with Logan for a month or two last year while Jillian was busy helping her sister, and she was pretty sure the amazing time Josie had with them was a big factor in Brad’s decision to move back to Trinity Falls.

“Oh, Caroline would love that,” Annabelle said with a fond smile. It was clear how much she adored her daughter-in-law.

“Great,” Jillian said. “We’ll definitely do that.”

“Thanks for letting me borrow her back, ladies,” Brad said in his charming way.

They all laughed and said their goodbyes before Jillian followed Brad outside toward his car.

The wind was so cold that she hurried to button up her coat. Now that she wasn’t distracted with her new friends, the thought of Brad and the pretty blonde lady slammed back into her head and her breath caught in her throat.

“You okay?” Brad asked as he opened the car door for her.

“It’s just really cold,” she said, hoping he would think that was a good enough answer.

She didn’t like being anything but honest with the man who had been the kindest and best of employers for almost ten years. But she also couldn’t tell him that seeing him with another woman hurt so much it felt like she couldn’t breathe.

You’re not in love with him , she told herself fiercely as he got into the car. You just haven’t been out in the world in a long time .

Playing house with Brad Williams had been a really nice way to spend her twenties. But the reality was that if she wanted a family of her own, she was the one who ought to be going out with someone, and as quickly as possible.

When I get back to the city, she told herself. I’ll get Fee to help me.

Fiona Baxter was her best friend, and everything Jillian wasn’t—brave, brash, and brilliantly independent. She could never understand why Jillian preferred to spend her nights off reading or watching funny movies with Josie when the clubs of the city and the dating apps awaited her.

Jillian adored her friend, but she had always thought Fee was a little on the wild side.

But maybe a little time on the wild side was exactly what she needed right now.

“What are you thinking about?” Brad asked suddenly.

“I was just thinking about Fee,” she admitted.

“Hm,” Brad said, frowning.

Brad and Fee had never gotten along. Jillian wasn’t really sure why. Though Fee had plenty of guesses.

He’s just an old stick in the mud, Fee had said once.

He’s jealous that you can go out and he can’t, she’d guessed another time.

He wants you all to himself, she said one night when they were out dancing.

That had made Jillian smile and Fee had yelled at her.

You can’t fall in love with him, she had said. He just sees you as one more useful thing in his house. Like an oven or a refrigerator.

When Jillian had protested that it wasn’t true, Fee had laughed and made her promise not to fall in love with him.

It was probably too late by then, but Jillian had pledged to try. And now she knew for sure it was too late. But thankfully, Brad was pulling his car up in front of the elementary school, so she could focus on something else for a while.

“I’m going to get out,” he told her. “But I know it’s cold. You can stay in with the heat going.”

“No way,” she said, hopping out.

The best time to see Josie was the moment she walked out the door of the school, when she was excited to share how the day had gone, and when she still remembered details, like what she had eaten for lunch, and who she played with on the playground.

Brad smiled, but his eyes looked sad.

The bell rang before she could ask why, and the doors opened, allowing kids to flow out onto the playground like a colorful stream in their big, puffy coats with hand-knitted scarves, movie character hats, and bright smiles on their faces.

Back home, Josie was normally the first one out. But today the stream of kids was down to a trickle by the time she trudged out, eyes on the ground, feet dragging. And just like that, all of Jillian’s problems faded into the background as she wondered what it was that had made Josie so sad, and what she was going to do to fix it.