22. Aria

The next morning, after thinking about what it will be like to return home, I decide I don't want to stay with Lucy and Donovan either. While they may not try to keep me in the United States, they are an extension of my brother and I don't want to be under anyone's watchful eyes.

When I tell Luca my decision over breakfast, he frowns. "You should stay with your Family. It"s safer there."

I shake my head. "I don"t want to be cooped up in Niko"s penthouse or with Lucy and Donovan. I don't need a babysitter. I want to be on my own."

Luca sighs, running a hand through his dark hair. "It's not about babysitting, it's about being safe. You need protection."

"You can provide me protection."

He puts his hand over mine. "I can't come with you. You know that."

"So send someone with me. Didn't you say I'm yours now?" I wonder if I'm asking too much.

Luca looks conflicted. I know it"s hard for him to suggest I stay with Niko, the man who has opposed our relationship from the start. But I also see the logic in his concern.

Finally, he nods. "Okay. I'll send Bruno with you."

I"m a little surprised that Luca is sending his most trusted associate to watch over me, especially with so much going on right now. "Don't you need him? You can send someone else."

Luca presses his hand on my cheek. "Aria, you are my number one treasure. I won"t take any chances when it comes to your wellbeing." His eyes burn with a fierce intensity that makes my heart skip a beat. "Bruno is the best man for the job, and I need him to keep you safe while you"re away from me."

"Thank you." I lean in and kiss him, feeling happy and cared for. There haven't been any exchanges of words of love, but there's no denying that I feel my place is here with Luca.

The next day,I fly to New York with Bruno. It wasn't that long ago when he was escorting me from New York to Italy, yet in many ways, it feels like a lifetime ago. So much has happened, some of it not so good. But I'm stronger now, more sure of myself and what I want, not from a dreamer's perspective like before. I'm more grounded in reality.

As we drive through the city streets, I can"t help but feel a sense of independence, even with Bruno by my side as my protection. This isn"t the sheltered life I once knew under Niko"s thumb. I"m making my own choices now, even if I"m still not entirely free.

I check into the hotel on Fifth Avenue not far from Central Park. I have a lovely two-bedroom suite, although Bruno states that he'll sleep on the couch so he can better watch the door for intruders.

The following day, I prepare for Lucy"s baby shower. It may be odd, but I want to look as different as I feel inside. Confident. Mature. I don't want them to see a petulant, spoiled young woman, as I'm sure Niko sees me.

I select a pastel yellow dress and style my dark hair into a loose chignon bun. As I apply my makeup in the hotel mirror, I can"t help but feel a flutter of nerves. It"s been so long since I"ve seen my family and friends.

Dressed and ready, I leave the hotel with Bruno. He walks beside me, his eyes scanning the area with a worried expression. I know he"s concerned about Niko"s reaction to my return. He's outnumbered in my brother's territory.

"I don't think Niko will do anything to you," I say as we approach the car Lucy sent for us.

"It's not me I'm worried about." He gives me a kind smile. "If I don't return to Italy with you, Luca's heart will break."

His words send a flutter through my heart. It also boosts my confidence. I'm not a runaway brat. I'm a woman who chooses to be with the man she loves and who cares deeply for her too.

I slide into the back of the sleek, black car with Bruno sitting next to me. I take a deep breath, trying to push away the anxiety. This is my family, and I"m here to celebrate Lucy's coming motherhood. No matter what happens, I won"t let Niko or the Mafia drama ruin this day for me.

When we arrive at the lavish downtown venue, I step out of the car. The building is decked out in elegant floral arrangements and glimmering lights, a clear sign that Donovan has spared no expense for Lucy"s baby shower.

As I make my way inside with Bruno close at hand, I spot familiar faces. Kate is absolutely glowing, cradling her newborn daughter, Sophie, while Elena juggles her twins, Niccolo and Angelica. I rush over to them, enveloping them in warm hugs.

"Aria! We"ve missed you so much," Kate exclaims, her eyes shining with joy.

"I've missed you too." I peer down at the sleeping baby, my heart swelling with affection. "She"s beautiful, Kate." I look over at Liam, my brother's friend since childhood.

"Hey, Liam." I give him a hug.

"Aria. It's good to see you."

Kate and Liam's relationship is proof to me that true love can prevail even in the most difficult of situations. Yes, Lucy and Donovan, and Niko and Elena, have endured challenges, but to me, Kate's not being from our world and Liam's closed off emotions should have gotten in the way. Love, true love, does make a difference, even if life is messy and complicated.

Elena chimes in, bouncing one of the twins on her hip. "You look good, Aria. Happy."

"I am." I glance around, wanting Niko to have heard her statement. But I don't see him.

"You'll have to catch us up on everything."

"There's so much." I figure I'll avoid mentioning Sabini, which they no doubt know about from Niko. I'll keep the latest about Electra to myself as well. "Where's Lucy?"

"You can't miss me." Lucy's voice is laced with irritation. "I'm like a beached whale."

"A beautiful beached whale." Donovan stands beside her, a fond smile on his face as he rubs her back.

I give them both a hug, then I look beyond them, expecting Niko.

Donovan, who's been like an uncle to me, presses his hand on my cheek. "He's not here. He doesn't want to ruin the day."

I scowl. "Are you saying he can't help himself and he'll be a jerk if he sees me?"

Donovan's eyes are sad. "He's doing the best he can."

Not good enough, I think, but I put that aside. I'm going to enjoy my friends no matter what Niko does or doesn't do.

"Shall we let the fun and games begin?" Elena says. Her nanny comes over to help with the twins as Elena takes charge of the shower activities.

"Does it involve waddling? That's about all I'm good for," Lucy complains.

"Goodness, Lucy, where did your sense of fun go? You're such a whiner," Elena jokes.

Donovan chuckles, wrapping an arm around Lucy"s shoulders. "My warrior princess scares even the fiercest made men in the city."

"Yeah, well, you carry around a bowling ball in your belly and tell me that won't make you grumpy," Lucy says.

"I did. I carried two." Elena arches a brow.

"Everyone knows you're the nicer sister," Lucy responds.

I smile, happy to be home… no, not home. My home is now in Italy. But it's good to be back with my friends. They're the same. Happy. Funny. Loving people.

Elena leads the way with activities until it's time to eat. After lunch, we continue to chat. I hold Kate's baby girl, gently rocking her, feeling a surge of emotion. I want one. Maybe not right away, but someday. Does Luca want kids?

"She"s so precious," I murmur, my gaze fixed on the sleeping baby.

Elena sidles up and sits next to me. "You look so natural holding her, Aria."

I glance up at her, my heart swelling with affection for my sister-in-law. I'm so happy Niko found her and had the good sense to marry her. If only he'd develop good sense around me.

"I"ve missed this, being around family."

Elena"s expression shifts to one of empathy. "You can come home, if you want."

I shift, as does my mood. "I'm happy with Luca."

She nods. "I just want to be sure that your motivation is to be with Luca."

I frown. "What else would it be?"

"To escape Niko."

Not long ago, I'd completely dismissed her comment, but after everything I've been through, I take a moment to consider it.

Finally, I answer, "I've never seen Luca as my escape. I'm with him because I want to be. And he wants to be with me. Do you know he asked Niko for permission… which is crazy in this day and age, but?—"

She laughs. "Our men retain some antiquated ways, although I think it's rooted in respect."

"So you do know?"

She sighs. "Yes. And I don't necessarily agree with Niko, but he's?—"

"I know. He's the boss of everyone." I shake my head.

"He's doing what he thinks is right." Elena's tone turns defensive.

"For whom?" I arch a brow, not wanting to get into a confrontation but also not liking being told that Niko has to make decisions for me. I'm not inept.

"Aria—"

"I know you all see me as an immature Mafia princess. Yes, I was sheltered. Yes, there's much about the world I don't know. Do you want to know what I do know? I know my brother sent me away when I was ten years old after losing my other brother and mother. I know that he kept me away after school and college. I know he never told me about you and the babies. How is that right for anyone but him?"

Her expression turns to sympathy. "I can see that you've felt abandoned. Niko has made many mistakes in his life, but you can't think he doesn't love you and doesn't want what's best for you."

I shrug. "How do I know that?"

She watches me for a moment. "Is Luca good to you?"

I nod. "Very. He's sweet and kind. Niko says no to me all the time. No way he'd let me go to Luca. But Luca supported my coming here, even knowing Niko could find a way to prevent me from returning to Italy. Luca cares about what I think and feel. Niko doesn't care about anything but bossing me around."

"That's not completely true. Niko is overprotective, but he does love you and wants you to be happy."

"Then tell him Luca makes me happy. I love Luca with all my heart."

"Does he feel the same?"

Luca's never said the words, but he's said other things to make me think he cares for me. "We were supposed to get married."

Her eyes widen.

"Things happened, so it's been…" I don't know if it's been canceled or postponed. "It hasn't happened yet."

"And you didn't invite family?"

"Why would I invite Niko? He's not even here, and it's because of me."

She looks away for a moment. I know I've hit the nail on the head.

"I don't want to ruin Lucy's shower. Just know that I'm happy with Luca. Is that enough?"

She nods. "That's more than enough. If Luca truly makes you happy, then I"ll support you, no matter what."

I feel a weight lift from my shoulders, and I lean in to hug Elena tightly. "Thank you, Elena. It means the world to me to have your support." Not that she'll change Niko's mind because I doubt she can, but I have at least one ally.

After the party,I make my way back to the hotel with Bruno's watchful eyes keeping me safe. I check my phone and see a missed call from Luca. I press the redial, eager to hear his voice. I hear it, but it's his voicemail message. I do the math to figure out the time in Italy. It's nearly midnight. Perhaps he's sleeping. I can't stop the image of Electra in my room coming to mind and making the leap to her being in bed with him. I shake it from my mind. I trust him. I trust him. Am I talking myself into that?

We reach the hotel suite.

"Thank you for escorting me, Bruno. I'm sure it's not as exciting as your normal duties." I use the keycard to unlock the door.

"I don't know. Lucia is scarier than I remember."

I laugh, and he laughs with me. "I forgot you know her," I say.

"She was very good to Luca's father. Everyone respects and admires her for that."

Stepping into the hotel suite, I go to my room to change. Once in yoga pants and a T-shirt, I sit on the bed and try to call Luca again. Again, the call goes to voicemail. Worry grows. I pace the room, my mind racing with possibilities. What if something has happened to him? What if one of Sabini's men made a move against Luca? The thought of Luca being in danger sends a shiver down my spine.

Sinking down onto the edge of the bed, I try to calm my racing thoughts. I need to be level-headed, to think this through rationally. Perhaps Luca is simply busy, caught up in some important business matters. Maybe he's just asleep. There"s no need to jump to the worst-case scenario.

Still, I can"t shake the uneasy feeling that something is wrong. I exit the bedroom and find Bruno on the couch looking at his phone.

"Have you heard from Luca?" I ask.

He glances up. "Sure."

"Now?"

He studies me. "Is there a problem?"

"He's not answering his phone."

"He could be at the club. It's hard to hear there. Or maybe asleep." Bruno doesn't sound concerned, so I shouldn't be.

I nod. "Okay. If you want dinner, you can order room service."

"Are you hungry?"

I shake my head. "I ate a lot at the shower. I think I'll take a soak in the tub and call it a night. I've got a shopping day planned tomorrow."

He nods, and I suspect he'd rather be facing the enemy than chaperoning me around boutique shops.

"Will you let me know if you hear from him?" I ask.

"Of course. But don't worry."

That's easier said than done. As I sit in the bubbly hot water of the tub, I realize that worry is a part of this world. I imagine Elena and Kate worry all the time when Niko and Liam are working. Maybe Lucy worries too, although she's such a badass, I'm sure she's right alongside Donovan when shit goes down.

For a moment, I wonder if that's the type of stress I want in my life. I think about what I could do if I wasn't with a man in organized crime. But the idea of not being with Luca feels much worse. I'd rather worry about him than try to live a life without him.

I realize that I haven't told him how I feel. I've had sex with him, and I've acted like an impulsive, jealous ninny. What can he possibly make of that? I need to use words to let him know I love him. I need to do better to show him that I'm committed to staying. He is my future. As much as I want my friends and even Niko in my life, it's time I stake my claim to my life. To my love. To Luca.