18. Selena
Turning off the shower, I sit on the bench, taking a moment to catch my breath. I'm exhausted and I've barely done anything other than wash my hair and body the best I could.
Three male voices drift into the bathroom, but I can't make out who they are.
"Selena, do you need any help?" That voice I know. It's Elijah—no, Jay. That's what he wants to be called. He made sure to let me know only his father calls him that. Him and Julia.
"No," I call back, out of breath. My voice is so weak, I'm not sure if he can even hear me.
"Alright, my brothers are here. They brought you some more soup."
"Okay." I hate how shaky my voice is.
Not to mention now my nerves are on edge that all three of them are here. In my apartment.
Fuck!
I take my time getting out, pulling the towel from the rack and drying my body. As much as I hate to admit it, I feel better after cleaning up. When Jay suggested it, I scoffed. It was already hard enough to just move around without becoming dizzy. I knew I couldn't stand in the shower, and a bath just seemed like a perfect drowning scene out of a horror movie.
But Jay rushed to his truck, coming back with a board. He immediately covered it with a towel, placing it across the tub, and my heart melted. He was being so thoughtful.
Throughout the day, he's taken his time, asking questions about me and in return answering some of mine. Talking was a struggle at times and in those moments, he told me stories of him and his brothers.
It was the questions about Sam and I, that I tried my hardest to steer away from. I gave him minimal answers, not wanting to say something I wouldn't remember later that would bring my lies to the surface.
The more time I spent with him, though, the more I hated myself. How could I keep such a big secret from them? That I'm pregnant and one of them is the father.
God, I'm horrible and I know there's a special spot waiting for me in hell.
Stepping into my room, I pull the towel off and sit on the edge of my bed, taking the time to dry my hair. I'm already out of breath and seeing double from walking the short distance from my bathroom to here..
I'm not sure how much more of this I can take. I'm going to have to call the doctor's office back and try to get a follow-up appointment. There has to be something I can take to help with this other than what he gave me. It's not working for shit.
I pick up my cell phone from where I left it before I went to take my shower. I needed to check in with Sam, and I didn't want to risk him calling and Jay answering.
I have a sinking feeling he doesn't have boundaries. It was bad enough I fell asleep with him here. The whole time I was snoozing, he had free rein of my apartment to snoop.
A small part of me is paranoid that he did. That he may have found something to uncover my lies.
Opening my text thread with Sam, I message him.
Me: All three of them are here.
Sam: WTF
Sam: Are you okay?
Sam: Tell them to leave if they are bothering you.
Sam: You don't need to be upset right now.
Me: No I'm fine. Just nervous. What if they find out I'm pregnant? Thankfully they believe my story about having a stomach bug.
Sam: I can come back. I don't like you being there all alone and sick. Jose feels the same way before you even mention him.
Me: I'm fine and not alone. 3 men in my living room proves that. Just wanted to check in. love you.
Sam: I love you too. If you need me to come back I'll be on the first plane.
Me: I know and it's why you're my best friend.
I put my phone back down and stand slowly, my body swaying as I do. Reaching forward, I take hold of the dresser, gripping it while I wait for the wave of dizziness to subside.
Once it's gone, I open the drawer and pull out a pair of panties, some sleep shorts and a shirt. The thought of putting on a bra makes me sick, so I skip it, knowing I have a robe hanging on the back of my door.
I take my time walking over to it and slipping it on.
Time to face the men waiting in my living room.
I pad slowly and carefully down the hallway, keeping my hand where I can reach out and hold the wall for support if need be. As I pass the bathroom, my stomach churns and I fight to keep the non-existent contents in it from coming up.
I pause for a moment, deciding if I'll be able to do it, or if I'm going to be praying to the porcelain god for the umpteenth time today.
When I'm positive I'm good, I continue to the living room, heading straight for the couch. I feel their gaze on me, but I avoid eye contact. I can't face them. Not when I know I'm keeping something important from them.
I keep reminding myself this is for the best. If Mom found out, she'd never let me live it down. She'd use it as a chance to remind me of how all I want to do is ruin her happiness.
"Hey there, Cupcake." Zeke waves, a broad smile covering his face. But I see how his eyes are watching my every movement.
I pull the robe tighter around me. I know I'm not showing yet. But I'm having twins and I know I will be sooner, more so than later.
"Hey. What are all of you doing here? I've been trying to get this one to leave. I wasn't trying to get more of you to show up."
Lowering myself down on the couch, I pull my legs up, taking hold of the blanket and pulling it around me. It's my very own barrier to the world.
It's how I'm going to protect myself. Even sick as a dog, all I want is them. It's why it's so hard to be around them. They consume my every thought and my body craves them. It yearns to feel them inside of me, taking me to another level of consciousness as I come undone.
They're my stepbrothers, it's forbidden.
I need to get a grip and calm down. Closing my eyes, I count to ten. Being with them is not worth the drama it would cause between them or with Mom.
"We wanted to see the most beautiful woman in the world before we head to work." Zeke winks as he moves around the couch, sitting down beside me. So close that if I didn't have my blanket barrier, his body would be flush with mine.
"I don't exactly feel pretty and that's not something you say to your sister."
"Stepsister, not related by blood, so I can say it all I want. I can even remind you about that hot night in the hotel." He licks his tongue across the bottom of his lip, and my pussy quivers.
I remember it well. If I didn't feel like shit it would be one of the images I would use when I flick my bean.
"Zeke," Eli chastises him as he steps in front of me, Gatorade in hand. "You need to try to drink some more."
"I got you some soup. Is it okay if we eat with you?" Jay asks.
"You're here, so I guess so. Didn't take you for soup men." I try to laugh, but my body hurts too much to do it.
"About that. It's Mexican. If the smell is going to be too much, we can eat at the firehouse." This man has been showing me his nurturing side all day, and now this. I've missed someone thinking about me and how something would make me feel. My mother would never care. She'd do it anyhow.
I take a sip of the Gatorade, the coolness of it soothing my burning throat. Throwing up can really do a number on you. Once I'm done, I set it down on the end table beside me.
"No, it's fine, eat." I take the soup from Jay, admiring how he placed a dish towel around the bowl so I wouldn't burn myself.
Eli steps into the room, a bag in his hand, and takes a seat on the floor in front of the coffee table, using it as a table and also in my direct sight.
"Good idea bro." Zeke remains on the couch but scoots forward, pulling the coffee table closer to him, gaining a glare from an annoyed Eli.
The smell of the food hits me as they open the containers. I barely have time to set the soup down on the coffee table before I take off, running down the hallway, slamming the bathroom door behind me.
I hear a gentle rap before Eli's voice feels the air. "Princess, are you okay?"
"Yeah, just dying in here. Go back and eat, please. This is embarrassing as it is." Another round of vomiting hits me, and I grip the rim of the toilet. I really need to call the doctor. This can't be normal.
The squeaking of the door has my body tensing. No, please no, don't come in here.
It's what I want to say, but the words don't come.
He steps over to the sink, turning on the water.
"Where's your wash rags?"
"Under the sink," I answer, my voice audibly out of breath, and I don't care that it is. "What are you doing?"
"Shh," he replies.
Opening the door, he reaches underneath and pulls out a rag, running it under the water before ringing it out.
He squats down beside me, running the cold rag along the back of my neck, soothing me in a way I didn't even know I needed.
"Have you seen a doctor? They could prescribe you some nausea medication. But at the rate you're getting sick, I think you'll need some IV fluids too."
He continues to rub the rag along my neck, and I drop my ass to the floor. For the moment, I think I'm done.
There's nothing left inside of me. I'm just too fucking weak and tired to get up.
"I'm going to call the doctor tomorrow if I'm not feeling better." It's not a lie, I do plan to, just it's going to be my OB, not my primary care.
"Let me help you up." He stands, taking hold of my hands in his and pulls me up with him. I stumble and end up falling against his chest.
Fuck, he smells so good. I inhale his scent, reveling in the familiar scent of the cedarwood cologne he was wearing on the plane. He lets go, slipping his hands around my waist, pulling me tighter to him.
Tipping my head up, my eyes lock with his chocolate ones. My lips part slightly, and I let out a moan. All I can think about is how it felt to kiss him. How soft his lips felt, even though he kissed with such force.
Our heads begin to move closer together.
"Eli?" Zeke calls from the living room.
We pull apart quickly, Eli only holding onto my arm as we stare at each other.
"Yeah, what do you want?"
"Is Selena okay?"
"I'm fine," I shout back with a shaky voice.
Eli gives my arm a squeeze, but I needed a moment alone.
"Umm, I'm going to brush my teeth. I'll be back out in a minute. Go ahead and eat."
"Are you sure?" he asks.
I nod my head, and he lets go of my arm. I immediately miss his touch. He smiles and leaves the bathroom.
I almost fucked up and kissed my brother.