Chapter One

July 15, 1817

Landover Manor

Bedfordshire, England

"G enevieve Marie, have you even heard a word that I have said?"

The annoyance in her mother's voice yanked Gigi from her delicious musings of spending this rainy, gray day in the arms of a certain young man who worked as a glass washer in one of the taverns in the village. As of yet, she'd only stolen a few kisses with him, but he was exactly the sort of man a girl could get up to scandal with.

And there had been precious little of that in her life lately.

With a little shake of her head, Gigi caught her embroidery before it slipped from her lap and then focused her gaze on her mother. Silver strands glittered in the blonde tresses, made almost magical in the candlelight. "I'm sorry, Mama. Woolgathering. Rainy days always bring out that trait." She gave her parent a little frown as she glanced around the drawing room at three of her sisters assembled there. "What did you say?"

Her mother huffed while her sisters—Cora, Anna, and Emmaline—looked on with varying expressions of amusement. "I had asked you what you planned to do with the rest of your summer. Amelia has written to me, urging me to make you find a paid position as a companion as she and Nora have done."

"Gah." Gigi briefly pointed her gaze to the ceiling. "Mia wrote to me as well, lecturing me on the same—all of her letters are the same—but that is the last thing I wish to do. It sounds dull and horrid." Her oldest sister Amelia had wed the man of her heart three months prior, a viscount with pockets to let who was a scandalous rogue and unrepentant scoundrel, but they were madly in love with each other, which was this side of sickening.

It had been Mia's idea that all the Hasting sisters take paid positions as companions to help their pay the back taxes on Landover Hall before it was taken from them, and while Mia and Cora had done just that, Gigi had held back, putting off the duty for as long as she could. That was not the path to trod that would gain her the life she wanted.

"What did you tell her?" her mother wanted to know, as she pushed and pulled her embroidery needle through the fabric.

"That I have no plans to become a companion, that being such will not give me the life I dream of, that I have far too much spirit to be subservient or docile while someone else has all the fun." Gigi shrugged. "And where did playing the part of a companion get them? Mia married a viscount with pockets near to let while Cora married a retired sea captain." Which had happened just last month. "He owns a shop in Mayfair without enough coin to do much between them, which is why she teaches piano lessons to young ladies." She was already poor; she didn't wish to continue being such. "I am done with scraping by."

"At least the girls have husbands. They aren't alone in life any longer." Her mother frowned, which only made Gigi want to do the exact opposite of what she would ask. "You would do well to find yourself settled."

"Oh, Mama, please don't lecture me on this now." She wasn't exactly jealous of her older sisters, for didn't wish to marry if it meant giving up her freedom, and honestly, she was having far too much fun jumping in and out of scandal.

"When, then? You are seven and twenty, Geneveive, and you are wasting your life by not encouraging suitors."

Across the table, Gigi's sister—and Cora's twin—moved her hands in what was sign language from the Benedictine monks. Their older sister Mia had been good on her word, and had hired a weekly tutor for Nora, so that she could learn how to talk more effectively. In fact, all the members of the Hasting family were learning it, and it seemed to give Nora peace.

"See? Even Nora thinks I shouldn't be rushed into marriage." As she spoke audibly, Gigi made a few signs to bring her sister further into the conversation. "How is it wasting one's life to not marry? Wouldn't it be considered irresponsible to marry someone vastly unsuited and therefore live a miserable life afterward?"

All her sisters nodded.

A sigh came from her mother. "Ordinarily, that would be a true statement. However, where you are concerned, I'm afraid it's the only way to tamp down your penchant for trouble." She laid her embroidery in her lap. "Every time a new on-dit occurs bearing your name, each instance there is a new thread of gossip swirling around you and your potential scandal, it hurts your father's heart."

Ah, so then guilt would be the motivating factor in matching her. I don't play such games. "Yet he never thought how such gossip would affect his daughters' futures when he chose not to pay the taxes on this pile of bricks or his other creditors." She arched one of her eyebrows. "How is what I do any different?"

"No doubt it's because you don't know the meaning of discreet," her young sister, Anna, said with a grin curving her lips.

Their parents had taken in Anna and her sister Emmaline after a fire destroyed their home and killed their mother and father.

"What is the point of engaging in scandal if no one knows about it?" Gigi couldn't help but shoot back, much to the amusement of her sisters.

Her mother, though, continued to frown. Disappointment reflected in her eyes. "Can you not see that we only want you settled and happy? I would rather you have a man to care for you once we are no longer able to do that."

"Of course I do, but I'm hoping to marry a rich man who has a title. I do not wish for a life of struggle or scrimping merely to keep a household running."

In her formative years, Gigi and her sisters had enjoyed a life of privilege. She'd even had a few Seasons in London before the family had been forced to retreat to the countryside when they could no longer afford to rent a townhouse in London. Once they were at the hall permanently and her father's financial situation had been discovered, there was no more funding for new gowns or fripperies as there was in the past. No more opportunities to go to Brighton or Bath. Various things had been sold to help raise coin, and life had generally become dull.

I don't want that for my future.

"You say you want to marry a well-to-do man, yet your behavior isn't as proper as it should be in order to attract such a gentleman." Light chastisement threaded through her mother's voice.

"What would you like of me, Mama? To sit docilely in the drawing room and embroider my life away in the hopes some man will take notice of me, and overlook the fact there is no dowry for me because Papa doesn't have a head for business?"

Tears sprang into her mother's eyes while her younger sisters gasped. "You know his mind is failing!" Truth be told, her father was upstairs resting, for he tired easily now. "Your father tried his best, but the markets were volatile from the war and the aftermath."

"Then his man-of-affairs should have guided him better. There really isn't an excuse to have nearly empty coffers at this point in his life, and with so many dependents." For that, she didn't think she could ever forgive her father. And if she were honest with herself, thinking about the future terrified her.

Her mother huffed. "Your sisters send coin home as often as they can, but they both have other responsibilities just now, and they should put their husbands first." Her smile didn't reach her eyes. "We shall see Amelia and Cora at Christmastide."

Before Gigi could respond, Anna jumped into the silence. "Oh, I so adore the holiday season!" Her smile was one of innocence and hope. "Perhaps one day I will marry well, for that will solve all their problems and then Gigi wouldn't need to settle for a man who doesn't truly appreciate her spirit."

"While I appreciate the support, love, you might wish to think logically." Gigi couldn't help the giggle that escaped. "Do you truly believe that some random duke or marquess is going to tumble off his horse on the road, wander up here, and then fall instantly and madly in love with you?" She snorted in derision. "Love—if it exists—doesn't happen like that. Besides, you rarely leave the house due to your scars." Which she'd obtained in the fire.

"I like to think that to the right man, none of that matters." There was a strong note of annoyance in Anna's voice as she narrowed her eyes.

"Don't give up on those dreams," Emmaline said in a quiet voice. She never left the manor because the fire had traumatized her so deeply, she now saw danger everywhere. It was probably another reason why Anna stayed near home, so that her sister wouldn't feel so alone. "If a young lady hasn't her dreams, she has nothing."

Gigi cleared her throat and took back control of the conversation. "Regardless, real life doesn't work like that. And besides, who wants the responsibility of being a duchess? There is no freedom there and far too much responsibility."

"You wouldn't enjoy that life, for there is no room to prove a sensation." Disapproval lingered in her mother's voice. "Why must you constantly chase scandal?"

"It's more entertaining and fun." Gigi shrugged. "I detest being proper as much as I detest weak-willed men, society's rules, and stays. There must be something… more out there for me than what is expected."

For a few seconds, silence brewed in the room.

Finally, her mother sighed. "You have always been my wild child."

Her youngest sister Emmaline set down her handiwork and frowned. "You are quite certain you won't be a companion like Mia and Cora? That you won't help Papa?"

Annoyance stabbed through her chest. "Perhaps someone should have the courage to ask Papa just how he let himself get into this mess, hmm?" Why should she curb her behavior when her father didn't feel the need to do the same? "Did he gamble away the contents of his coffers?" When Mia discovered how deeply his pockets were to let, she said nothing of how it happened. "Why should his daughters need to pay for his sins? The man who should have protected us all above everything?"

"You have no cause to be cruel," her mother said, then dabbed the corners of her eyes with a handkerchief.

"At times, the truth is cruel, and you shouldn't sweep such things away." When Gigi glanced at Nora, her sister encouraged her with wide eyes and a nod. Dear Nora might be mute and she might not hear correctly, but her mind was sharp. Given the opportunity, she would make a name for herself. "I won't become a companion, always at someone else's beck and call, giving up my position in the beau monde to become a glorified servant. That is not the life for me."

Emmaline fretted. "It's respectable work for a daughter of a family in reduced circumstances, though. I scan the newspaper every Monday for suitable positions I can take."

"Circumstances not of my making." In this Gigi wouldn't budge. She didn't care if it made her ungrateful. There were consequences for everyone's actions. Hadn't her parents ingrained that into her head for more years than not? "However, I would consider taking the position of a governess." If the children involved weren't dull. Or proper. Or whining. That would only make the days far too long.

"Oh, Gigi." Her mother sighed. "There aren't that many opportunities of said nature here in the country. It's why your sisters went to London."

"And look where it got them." Why did she feel as if she were constantly forced to defend her dreams and her own intentions because they weren't like everyone else's? "Married, one to a reformed rake and the other to a retired navy captain. Neither of whom possess a fortune, and will require my sisters to always struggle."

"But they're in love!" Anna exclaimed. "That should count for something. Isn't it the one thing everyone in the world chases?"

"Why should I become like everyone else?" More annoyed, Gigi blew out a breath. "Love sounds far too dull. I can't imagine any sort of adventure would be had once two people wed, for a woman's worth dilutes to keeping a house and becoming a mother and becoming an ornament on the arm of said man." She shook her head. "I want so much more than that."

"What do you think will happen to you if you marry a wealthy or titled man?" When Gigi didn't answer, her mother shook her head. "You are na?ve yet, Genevieve, and it shows."

"No, I am hopeful and know my own mind." On this she wouldn't budge.

"However," her mother said, clearly not pleased with the interruption, "I am not quite as put out with you as I should be, because I agree with some of what you've said." For the space of a few heartbeats, she stared at each one of them in turn before resting her attention back on Gigi. "The girls' husbands are sweet, and they truly love your sisters. Your sisters are happy, and that is all that matters. You would do well to follow in their footsteps."

"Oh, Mama. You don't understand." Gigi harrumphed. "Love shouldn't come at the expense of being poor."

"There is more to life than bedeviling men and encouraging them to kiss you." When her sisters tittered, her mother frowned. "Yet I will tell you this. If you are serious about taking a position as governess, the vicar in the village is in need of one for his young nieces. There are two of them. One is eight and the other is six. They've lived with him for six months, after a horrific accident took the lives of their parents as well as his."

"How fortuitous!" Anna clasped her hands. "That will keep you close. You won't go to London and fall in love, and we'll still be able to see you." Sadness filled her eyes. "While I am delighted Mia and Cora have married, I do miss them terribly."

"I understand that." For the first time during this conversation, Gigi gave thought to her sisters outside of them falling in love. "I miss them too."

She and her sisters had done everything together. They'd been her confidants, her role models, her best friends, but then they'd gone off to London. Everything had changed after that. Their attention had been readjusted. Yes, they both wrote regularly, but it wasn't the same. She would have to wait five months to see them when they came to the hall for Christmastide. And even then, she wouldn't have her sisters to herself, for they would always be concerned about the wellbeing of their husbands, and no doubt they would wish to spend time with them, for Christmastide while one was in love tended to be more magical.

Or so she'd been told by a few friends who still wrote to her.

"Since Mia and Cora went away, it has been quite lonely." And perhaps that was a failing of her own. Just another reason to seek out that man in the village and get up to scandal with him, to keep that feeling at bay. Letting emotions linger in her person wasn't something she particularly enjoyed, for it obscured entertainment and enjoyment of the present. "While I'm happy to stay in the country even though there are no compelling or delicious men here, I most certainly will not fall in love. I will hold out for as long as I can, so my life remains my own." At least being a governess would make certain she kept that vow. The vicar was quite old if she remembered correctly; she hadn't attended church in far too long.

Nora made a series of hand gestures. She shook her head and grinned. Out of all her sisters, she was perhaps the most stunning and beautiful. Ruby lips and cornflower blue eyes would enchant any man who happened upon her… if they could manage to understand her and provide the requisite patience and care she needed.

"Dear Nora." Gigi pulled a face. "If that means I am a spinster for the rest of my life, so be it, dear. That is not the worst thing a woman can be labeled."

"I agree with you." Her mother nodded. "Yet you are coming scandalously close to gaining a label from which you won't be able to recover your reputation."

Another huff of annoyance escaped her. "I am capable of guiding my own life." It was indeed her own, and she was quite content with that, as long as she could continue to kiss interesting men in shadowy corners or private spots throughout the country. "After all, how difficult could becoming a governess be? Regardless of my flirtatious behavior, I was quite astute in many subjects at school."

Her mother remained silent, but her eyes said that she expected Gigi to fail.

Emmaline smiled. "I think being a governess sounds lovely. Children are adorable."

" Some children," Gigi added as knots of concern pulled in her belly. I'll show them all. "Regardless, I should be home each evening to take dinner with you." At least it would be honest work for honest wages, and it would help her forget about life's responsibilities and worries. "That is, if the vicar is amenable to installing me in the position. He is quite aged, and from what I remember, he's apt to fall asleep at tea."

"Uh…" Anna frowned. "There is something you must know about the vicar—"

"Hush, Anna," her mother warned, with an odd expression on her face. "Genevieve has made it quite clear that she can manage her own life and her own choices. We should respect her wishes in that. She is perfectly capable of calling on the vicar and explaining why she is there."

A speaking glance was exchanged between them while Nora quickly signed something to their mother Gigi couldn't quite understand.

Bored with her embroidery, Gigi tossed it into the basket at her feet. "I suppose I should go upstairs and decide on a dress, for I intend to call on the vicar in the next couple of days." She looked at her sisters. "Do any of you wish to help me?"

Emmaline volunteered. "I will, and if we cannot find something in your wardrobe, perhaps Mia or Cora left something behind that will work."

"Thank you."

"And remember, Emmaline, Gigi can take care of herself. She needs no advice from us." With a slight smile Gigi didn't quite trust, her mother waved them both off. "If you have a chance, go out and gather a bouquet of wildflowers for our luncheon table. Perhaps that will cheer your father."

"I will, Mama." With a feeling of relief, Gigi quickly escaped the room with her youngest sister on her heels.