11. Ayden

Chapter 11

Ayden

D eclan held me all night as we slept, his fingers twining in my hair and massaging my scalp. I could have lain like that forever, damn the world and its troubles.

The next morning, we returned through the gate to the cavern in the Melucian mountains.

I was still disoriented from Traveling, bracing myself against the Melucian gate, when Declan’s whole body stiffened and his eyes grew wide.

“What is it?” I wobbled to where he stood.

“It’s Atikus,” he said, sudden urgency filling his eyes and voice. “He’s in trouble.”

I watched in silence as Declan stared into the nothingness of the rough-hewn walls, feeling about as useful as a broken bolt.

“I have to get to Saltstone.”

“What happened?”

Declan paced before the gate. “I couldn’t tell. He reached out, and I could sense he was in pain or fighting someone, something like that, but he couldn’t really speak. He said something about ‘her spirit’ and ‘inside my head.’ I think that’s what he said.”

“That is not ominous at all.” Sarcasm dripped from my lips.

Declan nodded, still staring as he sorted through whatever Atikus had told him. Before I could sit and pour some of the ever-present wine, Declan gripped my shoulder and squeezed his eyes shut.

Nothing happened.

His eyes opened, and he flinched.

“Dammit. I still can’t Travel.”

“Try it without me.”

Declan’s head cocked to the side, then he stepped back and concentrated.

Still nothing.

“It’s not working,” he groused. “We’ll have to hike down and find horses. There are messenger waystations between here and the capital where we can get fresh horses. If we push—”

“It will still take nearly a month.”

Declan fell into a chair and pressed his palms to his temples.

“What am I supposed to do? I have all this power, and I’m stuck here in a cave unable to help.”

“Whatever is happening, Atikus will have to face it on his own. He is strong, much stronger than most think.” I sat beside him.

“What if my mother could help?”

“Your mother?” My brows furrowed. “The same mother who left you when you were little?”

Declan’s eyes widened. A heartbeat later, he shook his head and squeezed them shut again.

“Sorry, I just meant . . . what if the people I met on the island could help?”

“You still haven’t told me much about them—or your time there—but sure, if you think they have magic that could get you to Atikus, why not try?”

He stared at me so long I started to squirm in my chair.

“Are you okay, Dec?”

“Fine. I’m fine.” He stood and began pacing and muttering to himself. “I should go back through the gate. That makes sense. If she can help . . . Yeah, that’s what I need to do.”

I watched but said nothing. Discussions of magic and power still made me feel as useless as a dry inkwell. They also underscored just how different we were, how different our paths would become. Spirits, we already walked different paths.

Declan turned and started, as if remembering I sat there with him.

“You should go to Saltstone, help with the rebuilding effort.”

And there it was. I could not help him in his magical mission, so he would send me away to work on something a Mute could handle. A bitter taste filled my mouth, and I bit back a sharp retort.

None of this was Declan’s fault.

It wasn’t fair to lay it at his feet. Still, I could not help but wonder if this was a preview of our lives together: me stuck shoveling shit while he and the Gifted handled more important matters.

I swallowed back the rising bile.

“And you will join me when you can?”

“I will follow you to the ends of the world, Ayden Byrne.” He closed the gap between us before I could blink. His lips were warm against mine, and I felt the shroud on my heart lift, if only a little. “I have to go. There’s no time to waste.”

Before I could hug him or kiss him back . . . or even say goodbye . . . he leaped through the gate and vanished.

For the second time in only a handful of days, I stared into space and wondered at my place in the world, at my place by Declan’s side.

Atikus was in trouble.

Irina’s spirit roamed the continent.

Declan was needed, now more than ever.

And I sat there, useless, unable to do a damn thing to help him or anyone else.

I filled a glass and sucked it down. The wine revived my body and mind but did little to relieve my sour mood. I doubted there was a magic powerful enough to lessen the sting of what I felt in that moment.

My elbows found the tabletop as my face fell into my palms.

“How long will he keep doing this?” I asked the empty air of the cavern. “How long will Dec want to be with someone who cannot even stand at his back as he fights? Someone who wields no power stronger than a bow or axe? I am no better than a common soldier—and most of them have a fucking Gift.”

I refilled my glass.

By the time I finished my fifth glass, I remembered that the magical wine didn’t cause drunkenness.

“Great. I cannot even get myself properly smashed. I really am fucking useless.”

I hurled the glass into the wall.

It tinkled to the floor, unmarred and mocking my fecklessness.

“Saltstone,” I mused. “A month on the road traveling to a city where I will be just as useless as I am sitting in this cave.”

I knew Declan’s first thought was of rebuilding our home. My father and mother had both survived the battle. Our estate had also survived. I could return and find work with the Guard or other groups helping to repair the Kingdom army’s damage.

But I would still only be one pair of hands.

There had to be something better for me to do, some greater purpose. If Declan could save the world, I could at least try to save one tiny corner of it.

But where? What corner needed me? In what corner could I do the most good?

I glanced down at the wine glass still wobbling about on the floor, and something on my boot caught my eye. I reached down and brushed brambles off the leather. The stylized owl pinned to every Ranger’s boot shone up at me.

And I knew my path forward.