12. More Real For Me

12

MORE REAL FOR ME

A ster took care of business in the bathroom and splashed cold water over his face.

He hadn't expected to feel as deeply as he had just now with Raine.

The thumping of his heart. The heat in his veins. The tingles in his body.

All those things, and he questioned the meaning of it.

When he came out of the bathroom, Raine was sitting on the bed pulling her socks on. She handed him his jeans and underwear and he bent to put them on but didn't button or zip them and reached for his shirt to yank over his head.

He was never self-conscious over his scars. But the sympathy in her eyes told him they were going to chat.

"You want to talk," he said, sighing.

"Not if you don't want to," she said.

He wanted to laugh and say she was being a chick, but he'd listened to his buddy and decided not to say that to Raine. It was a fifty-fifty shot whether she'd laugh or be offended. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her.

"You do," he said. "So we will. Go on, ask."

"If it hurts you to talk about it, then we won't," she said. "I mean that."

"It's not that it hurts me," he said. "But I don't want you upset either."

"I won't be. I mean, I'll try not to be," she said, "but seeing the scar makes it more real for me."

"It's real," he said. "Trust me."

"You told me that you saved a girl from a kidnapping," she said. "Did they find the person who did this?"

"They did," he said. "I told Carrington to run several times while I was fighting them off. She didn't."

"Why?" Raine asked. "Fear had her frozen?"

"I thought that but later learned that it was her sense of honor. She felt if I was saving her, she wasn't going to leave me to die. She was prepared to fight back more than she already had but didn't need to. Or did it in her way. She videotaped what happened. Kids these days, they just hit a button faster to catch things than I can do."

"Tell me about it," she said.

"She got a good shot of the guy's face that shot me and the van as it pulled away along with the license plate. Then she called nine-one-one while she applied pressure to my wound."

"Oh God," she said, her eyes filling. "She was a kid. How did she know to do those things?"

"Watching on TV," he said drily. "But she did all the right things and probably saved my life. It wasn't until I was in the ambulance that she called her father. Then she followed me there. The police wanted her statement, they wanted to take her into custody for protection and she said she couldn't leave me."

"How old was she?" she asked.

"Sixteen. More mature than most sixteen-year-olds. She's an only child; her mother had passed when she was a kid. Her father, he spoiled her, but he instilled a lot of values in her too."

He wasn't going to say anything about the money. It was no one's business. It wasn't anything that was public, but his parents knew. His sister too. He'd even told Zane and wasn't sure why. Maybe because he wanted to make sure Zane didn't try to charge him less or something for rent.

Then he wondered if his parents had ever bragged about it, but he started to think they didn't because in their way they wanted a cut of it.

"I'm glad it worked out," she said. "And that Carrington didn't get hurt."

"She didn't," he said. "She didn't even post that video when a lot of kids would. Just gave it to the police."

"That would make me sick," she said.

"I saw it. It still does. But shit like that happens."

He didn't care about the fact that he saw himself fighting the guy. It was seeing his body get thrown back when he was hit by the bullet. Good thing the guy had a lousy aim.

"Are they in jail?" she asked. "I'm assuming so."

"They are. They haven't gone to trial yet. I'll fly back to Texas when that happens. As I said, things take time."

"They aren't pleading guilty?" she asked. "They are on video."

"They will, but the police are trying to find out who hired them. No one is talking there. Not my problem."

Though he did worry about Carrington, but also knew her father would have her protected at all costs right now.

"I can't believe you just walked away and aren't worried," she said.

"I can't control that situation," he said. "There are things in my life that are easier if I walk away."

He'd never said those words to anyone before. He was surprised he was now.

"Like your parents?" she asked. "Were they not there for you when you were injured?"

He sighed. "They were there for me. I moved home when I was recovering and out of the hospital."

"How come you couldn't return to the service?" she asked. "I'm sure lots of soldiers are shot but then continue on once they are healed."

"Yes," he said. "But I sustained damage to parts of my heart that had to be repaired. There could be long-term damage."

The bullet had missed his heart but nicked some important parts on the way out. Open heart surgery normally took people out of the service.

Not to mention the nerve damage in his arm. He was right-handed and it was his left arm, but he fired a weapon with both.

Right now, everything seemed fine, other than tingles now and again, and he was doing the exercises he was told to do. He wasn't going to let anything stop him. Mind over matter was how he was trying to live.

"What kind of long-term damage to your heart?" she asked.

"I don't know," he said. "I'm not trying to scare you. But anytime things are repaired they can have issues later in life or they could be totally fine. For now, I'm in good shape and plan on staying that way. Which means not being at war where other people are dependent on you. I don't ever want to be the weakest link of the team."

She snorted over his dry tone. "Is it okay to be working construction and carrying things?"

"Yes," he said. "That isn't a problem. I'm not an idiot. I follow the doctor's orders. I'm not even the typical guy who moved somewhere new and didn't get a doctor. I've got a primary and a cardiologist too. My records are here and I'm under care."

"Thank you for that," she said. "I was going to say if you need referrals to doctors that River would know some good ones."

"I'm sure he would, but I'm seeing doctors in New Haven. He works out of that hospital, right? Or just in a satellite office?"

"Yes," she said. "He reads imaging for them at times. They do a lot of that from satellite locations and there are times he works from home only reading what is sent to him from all locations."

"My point is, I'm on top of my healthcare when a lot of people aren't." Like his father, but he'd never say that to his parents. They appeared healthy and that was all they cared about. They never wanted anything to slow down their partying with their friends.

"I'm glad to hear it," she said, patting the bed next to her, so he sat. He'd been standing while he talked, Raine sitting there looking at him.

She leaned into his side and almost cuddled against him.

He wasn't sure any woman had done that before. He didn't think he was the cuddling type either.

"Are you all good now?" he asked. "Or do we need to talk some more?"

"I'm good," she said. "Well, one more thing. I'm surprised I didn't say this before but feel the need to now."

"What's that?"

"I'd hope we are exclusive."

"You don't need to say that," he said. "I don't like cheaters. I don't believe in it either. Hell, I'm not sure I can handle one woman at a time, let alone two."

She laughed like he'd hoped she would. "Good to know."

"How about we go make dinner together," he said.

"Another activity?" she asked. "Yay."

"Now you're just yanking me along," he said.

"Maybe. But admit it, you're having a good time with me."

"Yes," he said. "I am."