CHAPTER SEVEN

She could not believe it. The man who was always far too busy to be bothered with domestic affairs was late for his own divorce. Late. For a divorce! When she first filed, he behaved as if he was offended that she did it. Then he behaved as if he was glad to be rid of her. Now he was slow-walking this shit again? Who does that? But it was typical Hammer.

Amelia sat at the table flanked by her lawyers on either side of her, the judge at the head of the table, and Hammer's lawyers on the opposite side of the table. The only thing they all had in common? They were all waiting on the great Hamilton Reese to make an appearance. They all had to bow down to his schedule because of who he was. And that, for Amelia, was exactly why they were in that courthouse today.

Amelia looked at her lead attorney. "How much longer do we have to wait on his ass?"

"Up to the judge. Hopefully not much longer," he added as he looked at his watch. Then he smiled. "Don't worry, Millie. You won't be his much longer."

Amelia stared at her attorney when he made such an odd statement. Because it hit her in her gut. This shit was real. She filed for a divorce from the man she thought was the love of her life, and what was crazy was that she still loved him. But once the divorce was finalized, it was going to be over. They were going to be over.

She still loved Hammer. She'd always love him. He was the father of their beautiful son and every time he walked into a room her heart still fluttered like she was some lovestruck teenage girl. But she was not the kind of woman who could play second fiddle for too long to anybody, including the United States government. Who owned Hammer. Who was never going to let him go. And he was never going to let them go either. Nor any of those thirsty, questionable females always at his beck and call. She'd already given him too many chances to get his shit together. Way too many. He blew through every chance. What she was doing was right, she said to herself again.

But when he finally walked through that door inside that courthouse conference room in his immaculate suit that hugged those massive muscular arms; those same arms that used to embrace her unlike any other man ever could, her heart said differently. What she was doing was all wrong, her heart started saying when she looked up and saw his gorgeous face again. And her heart was fluttering. This was far more difficult than she thought it was ever going to be.

But it was his attitude that made her push through. Because the former head of the CIA and the current head of the WSOD, the government's Worldwide Special Ops Divisions, arrived like a man who didn't give a damn either way. His look was as stoic as an ordinary joe out for an afternoon stroll. He wasn't apologetic. He wasn't arrogant either. He was just a man finally showing up for his divorce as if it meant nothing to him. And that pissed Amelia even more.

But after the judge gushed over him as men often did whenever the big man showed up, and after his attorneys went on and on about what they felt would be a reasonable settlement, Amelia's attorneys finally spoke. And when they spoke, it was only then did Hammer look at Amelia. Because he was as shocked as the judge was. According to her attorneys, she didn't want anything he had. Not even his name. She just wanted out. They had already agreed to fifty/fifty custody of their son. That was all she needed to know.

But when Hammer finally looked at his about-to-be ex-wife, it was only then did that entire side of the table see any kind of emotion on his face. And it wasn't anger or bitterness or none of that aftermath shit most divorce attorneys see on the regular. It was pain. Severe pain. It was as if he was finally realizing that she wasn't going to back down, and he was stunned.

But Amelia had been experiencing that same pain for years through his neglect, through his questionable behavior with other females, that she was over it. Or at least was trying to get over it. And him. But she felt his pain because she was feeling it too.

But the judge was delighted. This was too easy. "Mrs. Reese," he said, "are you stipulating that you are not requesting anything from Mr. Reese as your attorneys have just announced? Are you telling the Court that you are not requesting a dime from Mr. Reese, or anything else of any value? Including his name?"

Amelia knew her voice would be unsteady if she spoke. That was why she did not speak.

"Mrs. Reese?"

"That is correct," her lead attorney said.

"I must hear it from your client, not from you," said the judge. "Mrs. Reese?"

Amelia dared not look at Hammer when she spoke. "That is correct," she said.

"You do understand that Mr. Reese has agreed to give you some part of his considerable fortune, just not half of it?"

"I don't want anything from him," said Amelia, this time staring right back at Hammer. Only there wasn't a shred of pain in her hard, cold eyes. At least not to anybody else in that room. "I just want the divorce finalized. I just want to move on." She should have said need to move on, but she wasn't going to go that far. She wasn't going to ever reveal the true depths of her devastation to anyone: not even herself.

But she'd already revealed it to Hammer. He knew her better than she knew herself, and he knew, deep down, she wasn't ready either. He leaned over and whispered to his own lead attorney. The attorney, seemingly surprised, leaned over to Hammer and whispered something back to him. But Hammer ignored him. He told him what to say. That was the end of it. And the attorney, who had forgotten that nobody questioned an order by Hammer Reese, looked at the judge. "This information my client has just received from his wife is unexpected," the attorney said.

The judge smiled. "I would agree with that."

"In light of the uniqueness of her decision, my client will need time to consider her request."

While Amelia stared at Hammer, confused by such a request, her attorney wasn't confused at all. He was livid. "Your Honor! This is another example of Director Reese slow-walking this entire process. He needs time to consider what? Against our legal advice, and the legal advice of any attorney alive, our client has opted to give Director Reese exactly what he has asked for, and even more so. What is there to consider?"

"That's the problem, Your Honor," said Hammer's attorney. "Mr. Reese did not ask for what opposing counsel's client requests. She doesn't want his name? She never took his name. She remains a Sinatra to this day. She doesn't want his money? Since when? The first filing had her requesting a fifty/fifty split of his fortune and full custody of their son. Yes, she backed down from that full custody request, but this other stuff is news to us. My client has a right to consider his options."

This made no sense on any level to Amelia. What was there to consider? She didn't want his money, his name, his fame, or anything else he had to offer. Any other man would have been over there rejoicing. Hammer just stared at her.

"This is highly unusual given what Mrs. Reese, I mean Sinatra, has requested," the judge said. "But Mr. Reese wishes to prolong this situation again? Is that what he's telling me?"

Any other attorneys would not have even bothered to consult their client. But those other attorneys didn't have the former director of the CIA as their client. The lead attorney looked at Hammer. Hammer nodded his head with a look that suddenly changed. To hell with it, was the look on his face, although Amelia still saw the pain. But he'd already blown every second chance she gave him a hundred times too many. By the time chance number ninety-nine came around, she was done. By the time chance number one hundred came around, she was over it.

But how was she going to get over him?

"That is what he is telling you, Your Honor," Hammer's attorney said to the judge. But unlike in Amelia's case, the judge did not require Hammer to speak for himself. He accepted the attorney's answer, dropped down the gavel, and adjourned the matter for another two months.

"But Your Honor," blared Amelia's attorney, "our client is ready to finalize this!"

"But Mr. Reese is not."

"Mr. Reese is not the only party in these proceedings. What about our client's right to be heard?"

"Good day, counsel," said the judge in no uncertain terms as he got up and left the room.

Amelia's attorneys were livid. So was Amelia. Two more months of this? How in the world was she going to be able to deal with two more months of this?

She and her side stood up. They had to walk around to Hammer's side to get out. Hammer was just standing up as she rounded the table. And she didn't mince words. "You claim you're so busy, but you never have your shit together when it comes to this divorce. Now my black ass back on your clock again."

Amelia had that strong look about her that weakened the knees of most men that came into contact with her. She was not to be trifled with and every man knew it. But when Hammer looked at her with those icy blue eyes, and with that look that always seemed ready to chew you up and spit you out, it was her knees that weakened.

But she refused to ever fall under his spell again. "Damn you, Hammer!" she proclaimed and slung herself away from him in a fast getaway.

But just as she was brushing past him, and he could feel that feeling of love that overtook him every time he laid eyes on her, he grabbed her arm and pulled her against him. Every attorney in that room stopped in their tracks. Was he going to slap her? Beat the shit out of her?

But instead, he stared into her sultry green eyes in such a way that his knees weakened too. He missed rubbing her soft deep-toned brown skin, and tasting her sweet, luscious lips, and feeling her sizeable breasts against his chest. He was going to miss her. He already missed her. How on earth was he going to make it without her?

Amelia was as stunned as he was. Because his touch still affected her. One of the good things about being with Hammer she had to get over too.

And then they stood there. So close they could kiss. But their kissing days were over. They were enemies now. Their love had turned to hate. At least that's what divorce meant. Didn't it? Only Hammer could never hate Millie.

Amelia could never hate Hammer, either, and the reality of it was setting in. She despised him mightily sometimes, and he despised her with equal venom. They turned fighting into a hardscrabble, down-and-dirty artform. They made love as if they couldn't get enough of each other. Even though they didn't even live together. Didn't even live in the same country: Hammer still lived on Charlemagne in Canada. Amelia still lived in Baltimore. It was the oddest of marriages. A marriage that was doomed, in many ways, from the very beginning. But they always held on. And that was why they stood there. As if they were trying to figure out a way to hold on again.

But Amelia was tired of holding on. A marriage wasn't supposed to be about holding on. She wanted and needed so much more than that.

That was why she was the first to pull away.

Amelia left that room feeling as if she did the right thing. She wanted to breathe again. To be herself again. To stop making excuses for a man who didn't want to be excused. She was ready to live her life without him.

She just had to figure out how.

Hammer Reese remained where he stood when she left. His own attorneys could see how devastated he was. He didn't want the divorce. He wanted one more chance to make this right. But even he knew his chances were up.

He walked out of that room like a man unable to bear his own weight.