Chapter 40

“ I am so glad this works,” I said, looking out over the jagged peaks of the Himalayas, my feathers fluttering in the wind. “I’m not sure I would have ever gotten over not being able to come here anymore.”

Azmodea stretched and folded her wings, shifting on her seat on a boulder. Like me, she barely felt the cold, appearing fully at ease in her glittering, short-sleeved gown that would have given any human death by hypothermia in this climate. “I understand, darling. Earth is just a treasure, isn’t it? This scenery is breathtaking. Though, I’d be miffed that I wouldn’t get to mingle among people as much any longer with that power of yours.”

“Eh.” I shrugged. “That, I can easily go without. They’re just so…peopley.” I shuddered. “And besides, I really only have the two that I want to visit, and one of them is already dead. Yay, me—I can’t accidentally kill him!” I made an exaggerated shimmy.

I’d gone to see my dad the other day, though under special conditions to make sure my power of death wouldn’t unintentionally leak out and kill people around me. Instead of going to his house—or rather, that of his widow—where he usually hung out watching his living family, I’d flown to a small, remote, and uninhabited island off the coast of Oregon, a good distance away from the shore, and waited for the demon guarding him to bring him to me—stuffed in one of those boxes in which souls were transported from Earth to Hell.

Of course, I’d asked my dad’s permission first via a letter. Given his only other experience with a transport box had been right after Azazel had stolen him from Lucifer way back when, I’d wanted to make sure he was comfortable with it. When he’d heard the explanation of why all this was necessary, he’d readily agreed.

Eight years had passed since I’d last seen him, and thankfully, he was still not showing signs of deteriorating into a wraith. We’d spent hours on the small island, and I’d told him all about my adventures of the past years. I’d never forget the way his eyes had bulged when I’d shown him my wings.

“My daughter,” he’d whispered, his face full of awe. “The Queen of Hell.”

Yeah, I still had to get used to that title.

As it had turned out, it was possible for Azazel and me to visit Earth for a short time without our power affecting our environment—we just had to go alone. We’d done a few experiments on this—very carefully, of course, and with permission from Metatron and Shekinah—and either of us on our own had the least amount of power slipping out. Something about us being separated by an entire dimension dulled that deathly energy a little. It was still there, a steady churn of cold darkness in my core, but it was much easier to push it down and keep it contained when Azazel wasn’t around.

Shekinah and Metatron had surmised that the fact that this power was now shared between Azazel and me through our bond made it more manageable. Lucifer had only ever carried it alone because his connection with Lilith hadn’t been the same kind of soul bond that Azazel and I had. We now appeared to bear the power of death in equal measures, but if there was a lot of distance between us, or one of us was unconscious, it wasn’t quite as potent.

Sadly, this meant we could never visit Earth together, but it was a small price to pay for all that we had achieved—and for the chance that I could actually still see my loved ones.

For now, I didn’t want to risk too much, and I had yet to test the limits of how much and how long I could be among living people, which was why I’d met with my dad on that remote island, and why I didn’t yet dare to visit Taylor. We still needed to do more experiments, and only once I was sure that I could spend time in Taylor’s presence without any of my power affecting her would I risk meeting her in person. My heart ached at not being able to see her yet, but her safety came first.

I squinted at a speck on the horizon that was gradually becoming bigger. “I think that’s her.”

Azmodea got to her feet and peered in the direction I indicated. “Looks like.”

I bounced in place with nerves and excitement. “Do you know what the surprise is?”

My sister-in-law raised a haughty brow. “As if I would tell you.”

“Come on!”

“Zoe dear, why spoil it? She’s almost here, and then you’ll find out.”

“But I am your queen.” I put both hands on my hips.

“Oh!” She laid a hand on her heart. “Then this might be the opportune moment to tell you that I have a problem with authority.”

Grumbling under my breath, I watched the angel draw closer. The sun’s rays painted her white wings golden as she landed in front of us, her perfectly braided auburn hair unruffled by the journey. Wearing a sari of bright pink and turquoise, Naamah opened her arms and enfolded Azmodea in a hug.

“My sweet, sweet daughter,” she murmured, squeezing her tight.

I almost didn’t hear Azmodea’s husky “Mom,” that one word holding a world of emotion.

“You become more beautiful every time I see you.” Naamah drew back and caressed Azmodea’s face, then she turned to me. “Zoe,” she said, her turquoise eyes—identical to her father’s—filling with tears. “Come here.”

And then I was pulled into her strong embrace.

“I am so sorry for causing you pain,” she whispered. “I know you talked with Azazel, and he explained the reasoning behind my actions, but I wanted to apologize to you personally. Please forgive me for the role I played in your fall, and for the missed chance with your mother.”

I drew in a heavy, shuddering breath, then I squeezed her back. “It’s okay.”

She released me, dashed away a tear, and nodded. “I have something for you, and I hope it will make up for the hurt I caused you.”

Curious, I watched her reach into her sari and pull out a small object. I frowned when I realized it was a soul transport box.

“What—” I asked, even as the stirrings of an idea of what this might be prickled in my mind.

Naamah didn’t wait for me to finish my question, didn’t pause to explain. She simply opened the box, and with a flash of light, the soul inside was released.

My lungs stopped working. My heart shattered into a million pieces that melted back together. I only had a few seconds of seeing her clearly, then the tears filling my eyes clouded my vision.

“Mom!” I cried out and launched myself at her.

“Zoe,” she rasped on a grunt as I tackle-hugged her.

My world splintered. All the emotions I’d kept bottled up, all that pain and heartache, the despair and sorrow I’d felt over her death and losing her, it all bubbled up now. The dam broke, and it nearly broke me .

Sobbing, I clung to her, her ghostly form as solid to me as if she were alive. We sank to the ground, and she hugged me tight enough to make it hard to breathe. She kept stroking my hair in that soothing way of hers, and it threw me back in time.

I was a teenage girl again, lost in a sea of uncertainty, heartbreak, and anger, feeling so rejected from my dad leaving us, and here she was, my anchor, my rock, my one constant.

I couldn’t speak for a long time, my throat so raw, unable to stop crying in order to form words.

Eventually, my mom pulled back, her hands framing my face. Her eyes darted to beyond my shoulders, and I realized that I’d instinctively wrapped my wings around her.

I laughed and sniffed. “I have wings!”

Her ghostly form glowing with emotion, she huffed out a laugh, too. “I can’t believe it. Oh, sweet baby. I am so glad to see you. After we left things the last time we met…”

Fresh tears shot into my eyes. “I’m sorry, Ma. I shouldn’t have said those things. I know that now. It was wrong of me. I was being selfish by asking you to make a deal to stay on Earth longer. I just didn’t want to lose you”—my voice broke—“but that’s no excuse. I need you to know that I am not that kind of person. I was just overwhelmed and afraid, and I didn’t think before I said all that. I’m glad you didn’t make a deal. You were right to choose the health of your soul. You were right, and I was wrong.”

“Oh, honey.” Her features trembling, she stroked my hair. “I understand. I was just so sorry that I wasn’t able to spend more time with you after that, that we didn’t get to speak again under better terms before I—” Swallowing, she looked down for a moment. “Your demon came to me again before the cancer took me.”

My eyes widened. “He did?”

She nodded. “He explained to me what had happened to you, and why you weren’t able to visit me again. He told me about the talk you’d had, too. That you’d wanted me to know you’d changed your mind and were sorry about suggesting that I make the deal. So you see”—she laid her hand on my shoulder and squeezed—“I never thought you were that kind of person. I know you, and I know your heart. And it’s a good one, Zoe.”

That turned on the waterworks again. Sobbing once more, I fell back into her arms.

When I was eventually able to stifle the crying a bit, I drew back, my face a mess of tears and snot. I blinked at the tissue that was being held out in front of me.

With a glance at Naamah, I took it from her hand and heartily blew my nose. “Thanks,” I said. Frowning, I turned back to my mom. “How is it that you’re here?” I looked up at Naamah. “How did you bring her down here? I had no idea souls were allowed to leave Heaven and come back to Earth.”

“Technically, they aren’t.” Naamah regarded her nails. “But you know me. I have plenty of strings to pull. I searched for her for weeks and months, and when I finally found her, luck had it that the angel in whose stable she’d landed owed me a favor.”

I grinned. “Of course.”

“Anyway, I convinced him to transfer her to my care, so now she’s with me, and since souls in an angel’s care are their property, in a way”—she glanced at my mom—“no offense, darling!”

“None taken,” my mom replied with a dignified nod.

“I can decide what to do with her,” Naamah continued. “And if I want to stuff one of my souls into a box and take her for a trip, who’s going to stop me?” She shrugged and lifted both hands in the air, her expression all innocence, with just a hint of mischief.

With a relieved laugh, I stood and hugged her. “Thank you!”

“Don’t mention it, sweetie,” she murmured, squeezing me tight. Releasing me, she added, “And this is not limited to a onetime visit, you know? Anytime you and your mother want to chat, just send me a letter, and I’ll make it happen.”

“You’re the best.”

She flicked her braid over her shoulder, her face alight with a sly smile. “Oh, I know.”

Chuckling, I turned back to my mom.

“Tell me all about your new life,” she said and pulled at me to sit on a boulder. “I have heard of some of your adventures, but not in detail. I want to know everything.” With a smile, she added, “And tell me about Azazel. Tell me the story of you two. He seems to be wonderful.”

With a knot in my throat, I nodded. “He is.” I sniffed and wiped a new tear away. “He’s everything and more.”

And then I recounted the strange, unpredictable, amazing tale of how a botched seance at the age of thirteen had made me the Queen of Hell, with the love of my life at my side.

A few days later, I stood on a glacier under the endless Arctic sky, Mammon at my side, both of us watching the horizon for the demon who would meet us.

“I still don’t understand,” I muttered, unbelievably glad that I didn’t feel the cold here as a human would. “This doesn’t seem like a good idea. Are you sure this won’t end in bloodshed?”

“Why?” Mammon turned a perplexed look on me.

“I don’t know.” I threw up my hands. “Maybe because you gave his true name to a human, which led to him having to perform the humiliating task of acting out that human’s messages in front of me?”

“Nah.” Mammon slid his hands in his pockets and rocked on his heels. “He doesn’t hold a grudge.”

“Seriously? That goes contrary to everything I’ve heard about Belial.”

“In fact,” Mammon said with a sly grin, “he’s grateful. Said he owes me.”

I lowered my chin and gave him an incredulous look. “For fucking up his life?”

“Quite on the contrary,” he murmured. “Oh, here he comes.”

With unmatched speed, Belial approached the glacier where we stood and then landed in front of us, his wing beats whirling up the fine dusting of fresh snow that had fallen.

With his impressive height, the broad shoulders, and muscles all over his body, he looked like he crushed boulders with his bare hands and then ate the pebbles for breakfast. His features weren’t quite as finely drawn as those of most other demons, yet he was still arrestingly beautiful, in a primordial, hewn-from-rough-stone kind of way. He was ruggedly handsome, and I had no doubt he had a panty-liquefying effect on most women when he entered a room.

Not on me, though. I preferred my dude with silky black hair, storm-gray eyes, and a smile that turned my knees to pudding.

“My queen,” Belial said in greeting and went down on one knee. When he rose to his feet again, he stepped up to Mammon, reaching for him.

I was about to jump between them to prevent the aforementioned bloodshed, but Mammon clasped Belial’s arm and pulled him into one of those manly, back-thumping hugs.

I was sure I stared at them with my eyes bulging wider than those of the fish swimming somewhere below us in the frigid water.

“You’re…you’re okay? With each other?” I gestured between them.

“Of course,” Mammon said. “I told you.”

“But—how?”

Smirking, Mammon glanced at Belial. “Show her. It’s time she found out.”

His eyes glinting ominously, Belial reached into his pocket, pulling out—yet another soul-transport box.

“What the—” I flailed. “I swear, if one more person—angel—demon—pulls a surprise box on me?—”

Belial clicked on the unlocking button, and the box sprang open. A flash of white light, then…

“Ughhhh, no one told me how fucking weird it is to be stuffed in there!” The ghostly form of Taylor shook herself as if to get rid of an icky feeling, her strawberry-blond hair pulled back in a ponytail, with lovely bangs framing her face. “It’s stifling! Totally disorienting. Honestly, you should warn a girl, okay?”

“Tay?” I asked in a squeaky voice, frozen in place.

She turned to me, and her face lit up like a kid seeing a Christmas tree. “Z! Omigod, come here!”

The next instant, I found myself dragged into a crushing hug. I uttered a choked sound, partly because Tay was fucking strong and actually managed to squeeze me within an inch of my life—metaphorically, of course, since I was now pretty hardy as a demon—and partly because emotion strangled me.

“Aaaaah, it’s so good to see you, girl!” Tay jerk-rocked me from side to side, not unlike a dog would with its favorite toy. “And even better to hug you! I can touch you now!”

“Please don’t do so in inappropriate places,” Mammon interjected from the side. “Her mate is very territorial. Much to my chagrin.”

“Mammon,” I groaned.

Releasing me, Tay gave me a brilliant smile. “I can’t believe this is actually happening.”

I shook my head to clear it. “I can’t believe you’re here. As a ghost. Wait—have you died?” I rounded on Mammon, my wings flaring behind me. “You promised she was safe and sound!”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” Mammon held up his hands.

Tay clapped a hand over her mouth. “Zoe, your wings are amazeballs!”

“Before you hurt Mammon,” Belial spoke up, “let me explain. Taylor is not dead. What you see is not her afterlife spirit, but the astral form of her soul. It’s the same thing you did when you were a human and traveled from Hell to Earth. Her body is safely asleep at home.”

My mouth agape, I pivoted to stare at Tay. “You managed astral projection?”

“What, like it’s hard?” Tay put one hand on her hip and gave me her best Elle Woods impression.

I stuttered out a laugh. “My God, I’ve missed you so much.”

“Tell me about it.” She pulled me into another quick hug. “Eight fucking years without you, Z. Don’t ever do that to me again.”

“I’ll do my very best not to,” I whispered.

“So,” she said as she let me go. “What’s that I hear about you being Queen of Hell? I barely got used to the news of you having turned into a demon, and the next thing I know, you run the place! Not that I doubt whether you’re qualified for it—if anyone can whip that joint into shape, it’s you. But how did all that happen?”

I glanced at Belial, then grabbed her by the elbow and led her away a few paces. In a hushed voice, I said, “First, you need to tell me what’s going on with you and Mr. Messenger over there. Last time we spoke, you promised you wouldn’t summon him anymore, and now he carried you here in a box. Did you command him to do that? Are you still summoning him? If he gives you any trouble, just tell me, and I’ll take care of it. I’m his queen now. I can have him hanging upside down in our dungeon while hellrats munch on his guts. Just say the word, Tay. I can rip off his wings, too. I still need to grow my collection.”

Taylor leaned away from me and looked me up and down. “First of all, I’m loving this fierce side of you.” She gestured from my head to my toes. “Super badass. Bloodthirsty. Vengeful. Me likey. Secondly, I never promised I’d stop summoning him. I said the exact opposite . But—” She forestalled my impending protest with a raised finger. “Never to worry, because that boo is hooked on me. Won’t harm a hair on my head. He’s really not into that domestic violence shit.”

I shook my head and pinched the bridge of my nose. “Even if nothing has gone wrong in eight years of summoning him, that doesn’t mean—wait, what?”

Tay’s grin was slow and wicked. “Uh-huh. You heard that right.”

“You—” I gasped for air, then turned in the direction of Belial and flailed at him. “He—” Wheeling back to Taylor, I wildly gestured between both. “You two?—”

“We’re an item,” she said and winked.

I let my arms fall at my sides. “You’re in love?”

Beaming at me, she nodded. “He worships the ground I walk on, Z. I never knew what this was like, until him. It was a rocky road in the beginning, but this”—she gestured between her and him—“has been going for seven years now. It’s been truly amazing. He’s everything I ever hoped and wished for.”

“That’s…I don’t know what to say, except”—I filled my lungs and then shouted—“Taylor Marie Parker! You’re having sex with a demon? ”

Tay broke into giggles at my quote of the exact way she’d once reacted to the news of Azazel and me being married when I’d first visited her from Hell.

Mammon, however, yelled from where he stood with Belial, “You’re one to talk! You’ve been humping my uncle all over the place!”

Bending down, I scooped up a handful of snow, formed it into a ball, and threw it at Mammon. It harmlessly landed five feet next to him. Mammon stared at the failed missile, then burst out laughing so hard that he doubled over and Belial had to catch him.

“I’ll have you scrubbing toilets in the palace!” I shouted, clenching my hands into fists.

That only made him laugh harder, the misfit.

“Wait, you live in an actual palace?” Taylor interjected.

“Uh, yeah. It was Lucifer’s, but since Azazel and I took over the throne, we’ve moved in, because it’s, like, super central within royal territory. And it has all the bells and whistles and is perfectly set up to accommodate the rulers of Hell.”

Not too long ago, it might have been unthinkable for me that I’d voluntarily make that palace my home, especially with Lucifer still residing there, too. But so much had changed in the meantime.

Lucifer still had his quarters in the private wing, though he only spent one week out of the month there—the rest of the time, he was on Earth, watching over Lilith’s reincarnation.

He’d left to go see her not long after the battle with the archdemons. As soon as his wings had regrown, he’d taken a contingent of trusted warriors and set up camp near little Liliana’s home. He not only guarded her from a distance but also made sure to do occasional closer checks to prevent anything untoward happening to her in private. That girl was now more thoroughly protected than probably anyone in human history.

And I’d never seen Lucifer as contented and at peace than when he returned from a trip to Earth. According to him, even without speaking to her, even knowing she wasn’t the exact same person, just being near her and feeling that familiar energy was enough to soothe the pain of having lost her all those years ago.

“This is even better than The Princess Diaries ,” Taylor said, pulling my attention back to her. “Man, I’d love to see the palace. Bet it’s super pretty.”

“I can take pics and show ’em to you next time.”

“Yes!” Tay clapped her hands. “Oh, speaking of pictures.” Turning to Belial, she snapped her fingers. “Babe! Come here, please.”

And like any male who was a goner for his woman, Belial immediately heeded her call. “What do you need, love?”

She batted her lashes at him, and I’d be damned if there wasn’t actual, deep affection in the way she looked at him. Like he hung the moon and gave her the stars.

“Show her the photos,” she said.

Belial reached into his pocket again, and this time, he drew out a phone. Unlocking it, he swiped for a moment, then handed me the device.

I stared at the picture for a few heartbeats without comprehending. Then it sank in, and my pulse stuttered.

“Is that—yours?” I asked in a high-pitched voice, pointing at the adorable baby on the screen.

Tay nodded with the brightest smile I’d ever seen on her, and Belial puffed up his chest.

“You have a baby?” I’d had no idea that my voice could go that high. Tears filling my eyes, I looked at Tay. “You’re a mommy?”

“Yes,” Tay said, tears of her own thickening her voice.

“Omigod!” I swung my arms around her and pressed her close. “Congratulations!”

When I pulled back, I cast a smirking look at Belial, then looked back at Tay and asked with deliberation, “So, who’s the daddy?”

“Oy!” Taylor hollered.

Belial glowered at me.

Mammon and I both snickered in unison.

When I sobered, I turned to Taylor again. “Okay, I need full deets on this. How did this happen?”

“Um, Z, I feel like I’m not the person to explain to you how babies are made.”

Mammon guffawed, while I playfully slapped Tay’s shoulder.

“I mean,” I said over Mammon’s and Taylor’s laughter, “how did you and Hunky Chunk get together?”

“I object to that nickname,” Belial threw in.

I flipped my hair over my shoulder. “I’m your queen. I can call you whatever I want.”

Mammon chuckled and wiped a tear off the corner of his eye. “This is excellent.”

“Well,” Tay said, hooking her arm through Belial’s, “it all began with a wedding.”

“Sounds familiar,” I muttered.

Laughing, Tay shook her head. “No, this is nothing like your story. Okay, so you know this cousin of mine?”

“The infamous Amber?”

“The very one,” Tay said with a roll of her eyes. “So she was getting married…”

And then she told me all about how needing a date to her frenemy cousin’s wedding had ultimately led to Taylor falling in love with the most unlikely guy, who turned out to be the perfect match for her.

After hours well spent chatting with my best friend, catching each of us up on the other’s life, we said our goodbyes and went our separate ways. Mammon and I flew to the nearest hellgate, which was still hours away from our meeting spot, and when the heat of Hell wrapped around me as I stepped through, I inhaled a deep breath.

Every single cell in my body sighed at the feel of being in my own realm again. When Lucifer had crafted this dimension, he’d done so, unwittingly, with the power of death and had consequently infused much of this world with that energy. It was like he’d carved a piece of himself out of his spirit and created this realm, and now that Azazel and I had taken over the power of death from him, Hell itself felt as familiar to us as our own bodies. Much of this dimension lived and breathed in sync with us.

And all of the animals born of this realm instinctively gravitated toward us, which was how I’d found myself with dragons wanting to cuddle at the most inopportune times, and every hellhound I met wanted to be my best friend.

Now, as I walked through the palace, repairs and updates happening all around me, a pack of inferni followed me, and contrary to my first encounter with that predatory species that was a mix of feline and canine, they didn’t intend to eat me. They simply trailed me around sometimes, as if keeping me company.

When I stepped into the throne room, which was filled with members of the court, supplicants, and emissaries from the outer territories, my powers—both those born of my demon nature, and the cold one taken from Lucifer—rose in anticipation, in recognition.

Even across the distance from the dais with the two thrones on it to the massive double doors, Azazel sensed my presence, for his head snapped in my direction, and he signaled for the demon currently talking to him to be quiet.

The demons around me noticed me then, and immediately, they fell to their knees or bowed deeply, depending on their rank, and murmurs of “Your Grace” went through the crowd.

While I crossed over to the dais, the rows of demons parting before me, Azazel watched me with hungry eyes from where he sat on the throne, looking every inch the ruthless ruler.

“Court dismissed,” he said, his voice carrying into the farthest corners of the room.

It was a testament to how much respect and authority he’d already garnered among our people that every single demon rushed to comply with his command, even though many of them must have had cause to speak with him. In the time it took me to reach the dais and ascend the steps, the entire throne room had emptied.

It was only Azazel and me, and the bond glowing between us.

My gaze fixed on him, I closed the distance to his throne, and then I climbed onto his lap and straddled him.

Resting one hand on my hip, he thrust his other into my hair and pulled me to him until our lips were only an inch apart. “Welcome home, love,” he murmured against my mouth.

I smiled into the possessive kiss with which he claimed me, while my soul hummed with pleasure and love.

Yes. Now, I was home.